Another Mom under fire for post baby selfie.

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Replies

  • QuietBloom
    QuietBloom Posts: 5,413 Member
    If the goal of a strict diet is to gain the bare minimum of weight during pregnancy, no, that's not really healthy. That being said, there are women who have gained less because they either couldn't eat or their bodies didn't need it. That's fine. But it shouldn't be a goal.

    why?

    Because the goal of pregnancy is a healthy baby.

    Forget about the mom, right? Because having 2 simultaneous goals is unheard of. Yes, that's sarcasm.

    This is similar to the rule that we can only discuss (or worry about) the "important" things.

    Ignore the fact that expending precious finite resources expressing this judgment to the participants in an online forum...

    ...takes similar effort to the discussion itself.

    Yep. I'll call it. A false dichotomy.
  • IanBee93
    IanBee93 Posts: 237 Member
    This is not something to be jealous of, it is not as if a woman 4 days postpartum is allowed to diet or exercise. I didn't care what I looked like for about a month, I was more concerned about the ability to climb stairs to my bedroom.

    The only issue that I have with this trend is that women are being shamed into trying to make their bodies look as if they had never had a child. That is so sad to me. I am proud of being able to do an amazing thing with my body. I do exercise and diet- but I never am ashamed of stretch-marks, or a little pouch up front, or the fact that my hips have gotten a tad wider.

    Why is it so shameful to look as if you had birthed a child?

    because it's unattractive.
  • devil_in_a_blue_dress
    devil_in_a_blue_dress Posts: 5,214 Member
    The only reason to be annoyed at something like this is because you feel guilty, and that is not the fault of the person posting the picture.

    Perfect reply.

    She looks awesome. I don't have her genes so will never look like her but I can (and will) look the best I can be so her ost is very encouraging.

    Can't women be annoyed with seeing something like this because it perpetuates an unrealistic standard and not be feeling guilty or jealous?

    This woman has every right to be proud of herself and she didn't do anything wrong - and people who are making personal remarks about her husband, if she had a healthy pregnancy, or priorities are just mean spirited. But women, who are constantly told how they should and should not look, can be annoyed that this image, because this woman is, no doubt, the exception to the rule. She gets all these accolades for what is entirely genetic, if this is actually 4 days post. Does that mean this woman can't be proud? HELL NO. She can be. She should be, unless it's fake and then she's doing a world of harm. And yes, it's totally valid to question if this is real because biologically speaking, universally all women take longer to recover. I didn't take longer, my doctor also told me I was basically a freak of nature. So healthy skepticism with that in mind, in the face of a society that tells women we need to be virginal, sex kittens with also telling us we need to be sexy mommies seems TOTALLY logical.

    Maybe instead of calling jealousy without thinking, consider that women who don't appreciate this picture as a celebration of ONE women, probably are just annoyed that society as a whole thinks this is what women should look like. And if you don't, you are seen as less than.

    The end.
  • jonnythan
    jonnythan Posts: 10,161 Member
    The only reason to be annoyed at something like this is because you feel guilty, and that is not the fault of the person posting the picture.

    Perfect reply.

    She looks awesome. I don't have her genes so will never look like her but I can (and will) look the best I can be so her ost is very encouraging.

    Can't women be annoyed with seeing something like this because it perpetuates an unrealistic standard and not be feeling guilty or jealous?

    This woman has every right to be proud of herself and she didn't do anything wrong - and people who are making personal remarks about her husband, if she had a healthy pregnancy, or priorities are just mean spirited. But women, who are constantly told how they should and should not look, can be annoyed that this image, because this woman is, no doubt, the exception to the rule. She gets all these accolades for what is entirely genetic, if this is actually 4 days post. Does that mean this woman can't be proud? HELL NO. She can be. She should be, unless it's fake and then she's doing a world of harm. And yes, it's totally valid to question if this is real because biologically speaking, universally all women take longer to recover. I didn't take longer, my doctor also told me I was basically a freak of nature. So healthy skepticism with that in mind, in the face of a society that tells women we need to be virginal, sex kittens with also telling us we need to be sexy mommies seems TOTALLY logical.

    Maybe instead of calling jealousy without thinking, consider that women who don't appreciate this picture as a celebration of ONE women, probably are just annoyed that society as a whole thinks this is what women should look like. And if you don't, you are seen as less than.

    The end.

    So if a woman looks great, it perpetuates an unrealistic standard.

    Right.

    Exceptions should be condemned! They are unrealistic as standards! Film at 11.
  • QuietBloom
    QuietBloom Posts: 5,413 Member
    This is why I hate the lawyer mentality whereby people make issues out of nothing.

    Really? This discussion is about nothing? The fact that even pregnant women are becoming the focus of the 'fit and thin' pressures of society? I think that is kind of something worth discussing. But hey, that's just me.

    This is in fact an exercise of "making a mountain out of a mole hill."

    First quoted comment is correct. A lot of this is jealousy, butt hurt, and #firstworldproblems

    Well, your a man. Which at first might excuse your thinking. But then jof is also a man. So you don't get that excuse. You are just jumping in with your 'you're all just so jealous' which is both demeaning, and ignores the actual good discussions that are happening. But by all means, carry on. Your photo only ads the general derpiness of your comments. :flowerforyou:
  • dbmata
    dbmata Posts: 12,950 Member
    Well, your a man. Which at first might excuse your thinking. But then jof is also a man. So you don't get that excuse. You are just jumping in with your 'you're all just so jealous' which is both demeaning, and ignores the actual good discussions that are happening. But by all means, carry on. Your photo only ads the general derpiness of your comments. :flowerforyou:

    While you're completely inaccurate with your shallow interpretation, I will defend your right to be so wrong.

    I did appreciate the, "but youse a mans," argument. Was classic.
  • tomwatso
    tomwatso Posts: 1,304 Member
    I think she looks outstanding.
  • molonlabe762
    molonlabe762 Posts: 411 Member
    bump
  • devil_in_a_blue_dress
    devil_in_a_blue_dress Posts: 5,214 Member
    The only reason to be annoyed at something like this is because you feel guilty, and that is not the fault of the person posting the picture.

    Perfect reply.

    She looks awesome. I don't have her genes so will never look like her but I can (and will) look the best I can be so her ost is very encouraging.

    Can't women be annoyed with seeing something like this because it perpetuates an unrealistic standard and not be feeling guilty or jealous?

    This woman has every right to be proud of herself and she didn't do anything wrong - and people who are making personal remarks about her husband, if she had a healthy pregnancy, or priorities are just mean spirited. But women, who are constantly told how they should and should not look, can be annoyed that this image, because this woman is, no doubt, the exception to the rule. She gets all these accolades for what is entirely genetic, if this is actually 4 days post. Does that mean this woman can't be proud? HELL NO. She can be. She should be, unless it's fake and then she's doing a world of harm. And yes, it's totally valid to question if this is real because biologically speaking, universally all women take longer to recover. I didn't take longer, my doctor also told me I was basically a freak of nature. So healthy skepticism with that in mind, in the face of a society that tells women we need to be virginal, sex kittens with also telling us we need to be sexy mommies seems TOTALLY logical.

    Maybe instead of calling jealousy without thinking, consider that women who don't appreciate this picture as a celebration of ONE women, probably are just annoyed that society as a whole thinks this is what women should look like. And if you don't, you are seen as less than.

    The end.

    So if a woman looks great, it perpetuates an unrealistic standard.

    Right.

    Exceptions should be condemned! They are unrealistic as standards! Film at 11.

    That is not what I am saying at all. I am saying that the people condemning the photo, which I am not, might not being doing so out of jealousy, but frustration with a system that makes exceptions the rules.
  • QuietBloom
    QuietBloom Posts: 5,413 Member
    The only reason to be annoyed at something like this is because you feel guilty, and that is not the fault of the person posting the picture.

    Perfect reply.

    She looks awesome. I don't have her genes so will never look like her but I can (and will) look the best I can be so her ost is very encouraging.

    Can't women be annoyed with seeing something like this because it perpetuates an unrealistic standard and not be feeling guilty or jealous?

    This woman has every right to be proud of herself and she didn't do anything wrong - and people who are making personal remarks about her husband, if she had a healthy pregnancy, or priorities are just mean spirited. But women, who are constantly told how they should and should not look, can be annoyed that this image, because this woman is, no doubt, the exception to the rule. She gets all these accolades for what is entirely genetic, if this is actually 4 days post. Does that mean this woman can't be proud? HELL NO. She can be. She should be, unless it's fake and then she's doing a world of harm. And yes, it's totally valid to question if this is real because biologically speaking, universally all women take longer to recover. I didn't take longer, my doctor also told me I was basically a freak of nature. So healthy skepticism with that in mind, in the face of a society that tells women we need to be virginal, sex kittens with also telling us we need to be sexy mommies seems TOTALLY logical.

    Maybe instead of calling jealousy without thinking, consider that women who don't appreciate this picture as a celebration of ONE women, probably are just annoyed that society as a whole thinks this is what women should look like. And if you don't, you are seen as less than.

    The end.

    It doesn't annoy me to see her picture. It amazes me. But I agree that it could be an indication that the pressure for women to be 'thin and fit at all costs' is spreading to pregnant women.
  • wheird
    wheird Posts: 7,963 Member
    She looks fantastic. The haters are just jealous.

    I'm a little jealous too. Of her husband.
  • mmm_drop
    mmm_drop Posts: 1,126 Member
    People need to be less concerned about what other people are doing.

    ^This.
  • What ever voodoo she did for that body...,I want in
    ^^^ Me too!
  • QuietBloom
    QuietBloom Posts: 5,413 Member
    Well, your a man. Which at first might excuse your thinking. But then jof is also a man. So you don't get that excuse. You are just jumping in with your 'you're all just so jealous' which is both demeaning, and ignores the actual good discussions that are happening. But by all means, carry on. Your photo only ads the general derpiness of your comments. :flowerforyou:

    While you're completely inaccurate with your shallow interpretation, I will defend your right to be so wrong.

    I did appreciate the, "but youse a mans," argument. Was classic.

    Shallow? I could argue that you running around with your LOLZ and 'your so jealous' comments are rather shallow. Or is there a deeper truth you are hinting at?
  • jonnythan
    jonnythan Posts: 10,161 Member
    The only reason to be annoyed at something like this is because you feel guilty, and that is not the fault of the person posting the picture.

    Perfect reply.

    She looks awesome. I don't have her genes so will never look like her but I can (and will) look the best I can be so her ost is very encouraging.

    Can't women be annoyed with seeing something like this because it perpetuates an unrealistic standard and not be feeling guilty or jealous?

    This woman has every right to be proud of herself and she didn't do anything wrong - and people who are making personal remarks about her husband, if she had a healthy pregnancy, or priorities are just mean spirited. But women, who are constantly told how they should and should not look, can be annoyed that this image, because this woman is, no doubt, the exception to the rule. She gets all these accolades for what is entirely genetic, if this is actually 4 days post. Does that mean this woman can't be proud? HELL NO. She can be. She should be, unless it's fake and then she's doing a world of harm. And yes, it's totally valid to question if this is real because biologically speaking, universally all women take longer to recover. I didn't take longer, my doctor also told me I was basically a freak of nature. So healthy skepticism with that in mind, in the face of a society that tells women we need to be virginal, sex kittens with also telling us we need to be sexy mommies seems TOTALLY logical.

    Maybe instead of calling jealousy without thinking, consider that women who don't appreciate this picture as a celebration of ONE women, probably are just annoyed that society as a whole thinks this is what women should look like. And if you don't, you are seen as less than.

    The end.

    So if a woman looks great, it perpetuates an unrealistic standard.

    Right.

    Exceptions should be condemned! They are unrealistic as standards! Film at 11.

    That is not what I am saying at all. I am saying that the people condemning the photo, which I am not, might not being doing so out of jealousy, but frustration with a system that makes exceptions the rules.

    The system didn't make her an exception. Her genes and behavior made her an exception.

    There's nothing wrong with celebrating that exception.

    If you're so jaded with the system, which does indeed promote unrealistic standards for beauty through a variety of methods, that admiring or celebrating a genuinely exceptional person makes you angry, then it's your attitude that needs adjustment.
  • brower47
    brower47 Posts: 16,356 Member
    The only reason to be annoyed at something like this is because you feel guilty, and that is not the fault of the person posting the picture.

    Perfect reply.

    She looks awesome. I don't have her genes so will never look like her but I can (and will) look the best I can be so her ost is very encouraging.

    Can't women be annoyed with seeing something like this because it perpetuates an unrealistic standard and not be feeling guilty or jealous?

    This woman has every right to be proud of herself and she didn't do anything wrong - and people who are making personal remarks about her husband, if she had a healthy pregnancy, or priorities are just mean spirited. But women, who are constantly told how they should and should not look, can be annoyed that this image, because this woman is, no doubt, the exception to the rule. She gets all these accolades for what is entirely genetic, if this is actually 4 days post. Does that mean this woman can't be proud? HELL NO. She can be. She should be, unless it's fake and then she's doing a world of harm. And yes, it's totally valid to question if this is real because biologically speaking, universally all women take longer to recover. I didn't take longer, my doctor also told me I was basically a freak of nature. So healthy skepticism with that in mind, in the face of a society that tells women we need to be virginal, sex kittens with also telling us we need to be sexy mommies seems TOTALLY logical.

    Maybe instead of calling jealousy without thinking, consider that women who don't appreciate this picture as a celebration of ONE women, probably are just annoyed that society as a whole thinks this is what women should look like. And if you don't, you are seen as less than.

    The end.

    It only perpetuates an unrealistic standard if ignorance is king. I'd rather go the educated route than tell this woman she shouldn't post a picture of herself.

    Educate the masses instead of assuming they are too dumb to understand and cope with reality.

    The beginning?
  • devil_in_a_blue_dress
    devil_in_a_blue_dress Posts: 5,214 Member
    The only reason to be annoyed at something like this is because you feel guilty, and that is not the fault of the person posting the picture.

    Perfect reply.

    She looks awesome. I don't have her genes so will never look like her but I can (and will) look the best I can be so her ost is very encouraging.

    Can't women be annoyed with seeing something like this because it perpetuates an unrealistic standard and not be feeling guilty or jealous?

    This woman has every right to be proud of herself and she didn't do anything wrong - and people who are making personal remarks about her husband, if she had a healthy pregnancy, or priorities are just mean spirited. But women, who are constantly told how they should and should not look, can be annoyed that this image, because this woman is, no doubt, the exception to the rule. She gets all these accolades for what is entirely genetic, if this is actually 4 days post. Does that mean this woman can't be proud? HELL NO. She can be. She should be, unless it's fake and then she's doing a world of harm. And yes, it's totally valid to question if this is real because biologically speaking, universally all women take longer to recover. I didn't take longer, my doctor also told me I was basically a freak of nature. So healthy skepticism with that in mind, in the face of a society that tells women we need to be virginal, sex kittens with also telling us we need to be sexy mommies seems TOTALLY logical.

    Maybe instead of calling jealousy without thinking, consider that women who don't appreciate this picture as a celebration of ONE women, probably are just annoyed that society as a whole thinks this is what women should look like. And if you don't, you are seen as less than.

    The end.

    It doesn't annoy me to see her picture. It amazes me. But I agree that it could be an indication that the pressure for women to be 'thin and fit at all costs' is spreading to pregnant women.

    I think more than anything, people who are calling jealousy don't realize that not all women have this body type as a goal. When somebody says "Oh, you don't like this -- YOU'RE JEALOUS" you are actually saying you think you know what the other person wants.

    I didn't look like this after I had a baby, but also have a very quick recovery -- it annoyed people I knew who had longer recovery times because they felt this pressure to be back at it sooner than they were. They weren't jealous of my body, but with the societal pressures to be all these things at one time.
  • QuietBloom
    QuietBloom Posts: 5,413 Member

    Can't women be annoyed with seeing something like this because it perpetuates an unrealistic standard and not be feeling guilty or jealous?

    This woman has every right to be proud of herself and she didn't do anything wrong - and people who are making personal remarks about her husband, if she had a healthy pregnancy, or priorities are just mean spirited. But women, who are constantly told how they should and should not look, can be annoyed that this image, because this woman is, no doubt, the exception to the rule. She gets all these accolades for what is entirely genetic, if this is actually 4 days post. Does that mean this woman can't be proud? HELL NO. She can be. She should be, unless it's fake and then she's doing a world of harm. And yes, it's totally valid to question if this is real because biologically speaking, universally all women take longer to recover. I didn't take longer, my doctor also told me I was basically a freak of nature. So healthy skepticism with that in mind, in the face of a society that tells women we need to be virginal, sex kittens with also telling us we need to be sexy mommies seems TOTALLY logical.

    Maybe instead of calling jealousy without thinking, consider that women who don't appreciate this picture as a celebration of ONE women, probably are just annoyed that society as a whole thinks this is what women should look like. And if you don't, you are seen as less than.

    The end.

    It only perpetuates an unrealistic standard if ignorance is king. I'd rather go the educated route than tell this woman she shouldn't post a picture of herself.

    Educate the masses instead of assuming they are too dumb to understand and cope with reality.

    The beginning?

    :heart:
  • MstngSammy
    MstngSammy Posts: 436 Member
    I'm sick of hearing about it. She isn't a freak of nature. She just took extra care of her body during pregnancy.

    People just need to stop being so judgy.

    The "freak of nature" comments can also apply to the other end of the weight spectrum. We are all responsible for ourselves and need to stop placing the blame elsewhere.



    (Some medical conditions are not considered in this statement)
  • devil_in_a_blue_dress
    devil_in_a_blue_dress Posts: 5,214 Member
    The only reason to be annoyed at something like this is because you feel guilty, and that is not the fault of the person posting the picture.

    Perfect reply.

    She looks awesome. I don't have her genes so will never look like her but I can (and will) look the best I can be so her ost is very encouraging.

    Can't women be annoyed with seeing something like this because it perpetuates an unrealistic standard and not be feeling guilty or jealous?

    This woman has every right to be proud of herself and she didn't do anything wrong - and people who are making personal remarks about her husband, if she had a healthy pregnancy, or priorities are just mean spirited. But women, who are constantly told how they should and should not look, can be annoyed that this image, because this woman is, no doubt, the exception to the rule. She gets all these accolades for what is entirely genetic, if this is actually 4 days post. Does that mean this woman can't be proud? HELL NO. She can be. She should be, unless it's fake and then she's doing a world of harm. And yes, it's totally valid to question if this is real because biologically speaking, universally all women take longer to recover. I didn't take longer, my doctor also told me I was basically a freak of nature. So healthy skepticism with that in mind, in the face of a society that tells women we need to be virginal, sex kittens with also telling us we need to be sexy mommies seems TOTALLY logical.

    Maybe instead of calling jealousy without thinking, consider that women who don't appreciate this picture as a celebration of ONE women, probably are just annoyed that society as a whole thinks this is what women should look like. And if you don't, you are seen as less than.

    The end.

    It only perpetuates an unrealistic standard if ignorance is king. I'd rather go the educated route than tell this woman she shouldn't post a picture of herself.

    Educate the masses instead of assuming they are too dumb to understand and cope with reality.

    The beginning?

    It only perpetuates an unrealistic standard if it's not real. If it is real, this is one person's celebration of their experience. Their experience just isn't the norm.

    The frustration other people might have of this image might not be jealousy based (as this might be their goal) but frustration with a society that sets this as its standard.
  • Achrya
    Achrya Posts: 16,913 Member
    She looks fantastic. The haters are just jealous.

    I'm a little jealous too. Of her husband.

    You're a man and thus your opinion that other's are coming from a place of jealousy and envy make you shallow and derpy.

    I'm a woman and since I agree with you I'm probably out of touch with societies pressure on women or something. Or maybe I find this latest wave of feminism and all the party lines that come with it gross and damaging, so when people try to make one woman a microcosm for all that is wrong with the female image in societies view it makes me want to vomit.

    Or something. /kicks rocks
  • QuietBloom
    QuietBloom Posts: 5,413 Member

    It doesn't annoy me to see her picture. It amazes me. But I agree that it could be an indication that the pressure for women to be 'thin and fit at all costs' is spreading to pregnant women.

    I think more than anything, people who are calling jealousy don't realize that not all women have this body type as a goal. When somebody says "Oh, you don't like this -- YOU'RE JEALOUS" you are actually saying you think you know what the other person wants.

    I didn't look like this after I had a baby, but also have a very quick recovery -- it annoyed people I knew who had longer recovery times because they felt this pressure to be back at it sooner than they were. They weren't jealous of my body, but with the societal pressures to be all these things at one time.

    Oh, I'm jealous, no doubt about it. LOL But I'm also jealous that she's younger, has her whole life ahead of her, looks like a model. On and on. But it doesn't make me angry at her, or even annoyed. I don't see the two emotions as being mutually exclusive. I can be jealous (or envious) but I don't feel the need to bring her down. I had my glory days, and now she is having hers. :drinker:
  • servilia
    servilia Posts: 3,452 Member
    "bare minimum" as stated by whom?

    Those minimums don't really mean everything other than that they're a mean, based on a hypothesis and some sometimes outdated studies.

    The placenta, extra fluid, extra blood and the baby all weigh SOMETHING. The fact that it varies is accounted for by the proscribed range of acceptable weight gain. If someone gains less than this it means she's actually losing weight from her pre-existing stores which is not recommended unless the mother was overweight to begin with.
  • Hauntinglyfit
    Hauntinglyfit Posts: 5,537 Member
    Whenever I post a picture of my outstanding self, what I have in mind is "dear god, i am so hot", not "here you go womens, this is what you need to look like". Then I french kiss the mirror.
  • devil_in_a_blue_dress
    devil_in_a_blue_dress Posts: 5,214 Member

    It doesn't annoy me to see her picture. It amazes me. But I agree that it could be an indication that the pressure for women to be 'thin and fit at all costs' is spreading to pregnant women.

    I think more than anything, people who are calling jealousy don't realize that not all women have this body type as a goal. When somebody says "Oh, you don't like this -- YOU'RE JEALOUS" you are actually saying you think you know what the other person wants.

    I didn't look like this after I had a baby, but also have a very quick recovery -- it annoyed people I knew who had longer recovery times because they felt this pressure to be back at it sooner than they were. They weren't jealous of my body, but with the societal pressures to be all these things at one time.

    Oh, I'm jealous, no doubt about it. LOL But I'm also jealous that she's younger, has her whole life ahead of her, looks like a model. On and on. But it doesn't make me angry at her, or even annoyed. I don't see the two emotions as being mutually exclusive. I can be jealous (or envious) but I don't feel the need to bring her down. I had my glory days, and now she is having hers. :drinker:

    I was responding to more general comments from people claiming of you don't love this picture, you must be jealous. I personally have no issues with it -- AT ALL. There is just another answer than "you're jealous" to people who find this photo annoying (which again, I don't).

    I don't really feel envious because this isn't what I want to look like, but I bounced back nearly as quickly as she did. Lucky ducks.
  • KayNowayJose
    KayNowayJose Posts: 138 Member
    I'm too lazy to write my long winded response to this, and have like 10 people think I'm crazy, instead I'll go watch a Starz movie and workout while doing it. :-P
  • Lifelink
    Lifelink Posts: 193 Member
    The internet hate machine continues. So many people care about something that has **** all to do with them.

    Keep making excuses for yourself, that will totally give you the body you want. *rolls eyes*

    3vbe5k.jpg

    Meanwhile, I'll continue to be getting in the best shape of my life and using things like this as motivation- as it's intended.
  • servilia
    servilia Posts: 3,452 Member
    :drinker:
    Whenever I post a picture of my outstanding self, what I have in mind is "dear god, i am so hot", not "here you go womens, this is what you need to look like". Then I french kiss the mirror.
  • Achrya
    Achrya Posts: 16,913 Member
    Whenever I post a picture of my outstanding self, what I have in mind is "dear god, i am so hot", not "here you go womens, this is what you need to look like". Then I french kiss the mirror.

    But society.
  • dbmata
    dbmata Posts: 12,950 Member
    Well, your a man. Which at first might excuse your thinking. But then jof is also a man. So you don't get that excuse. You are just jumping in with your 'you're all just so jealous' which is both demeaning, and ignores the actual good discussions that are happening. But by all means, carry on. Your photo only ads the general derpiness of your comments. :flowerforyou:

    While you're completely inaccurate with your shallow interpretation, I will defend your right to be so wrong.

    I did appreciate the, "but youse a mans," argument. Was classic.

    Shallow? I could argue that you running around with your LOLZ and 'your so jealous' comments are rather shallow. Or is there a deeper truth you are hinting at?

    Shallow, lacking in depth, 14 second attempt and analysis after coming up with a preconceived position based on the "you're a man" argument. It was a failure, but I won't hold it against you. The attempted body shaming of the people pissed off by her pictures is amusing, as was your attempt at "shaming" me, or whatever that was with your statement about how I look.

    I would say more, but I don't think I could continue being as polite as you seem to need.