Anybody still feel ugly after losing weight?
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I think this is pretty common. BUT
It can be a red flag for something more serious:
body dysmorphic disorder.
here's a thing about it: I hope it's helpful!
(not trying to say anyone in this thread has this, I just figure knowledge is power)
http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC3181960/0 -
I think this is pretty common. BUT
It can be a red flag for something more serious:
body dysmorphic disorder.
here's a thing about it: I hope it's helpful!
(not trying to say anyone in this thread has this, I just figure knowledge is power)
http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC3181960/
Yep - been there all of my life. I used to get bullied throughout my childhood/adolescence for having LOADS of spots and being really small and skinny. This affected my confidence greatly and I used to shy away from girls (and later women) - I didn't even get my first partner until I was 25!
I've always felt that I'm too ugly for anything and even getting in shape hasn't helped. I feel that I need to look like Jeff Seid before anybody will look me at me with a look better than contempt. What my mirror shows me is a far cry from the positive feedback that I've had on here.0 -
I don't feel ugly but I do still see a fat person when I look in the mirror. I know I lost a lot of weight and look tons better but I'm not where I want to be yet. I'm wanting to work on having a positive image of self so wear clothes where I feel that I look my best in.0
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your life is still a tale of brutal rejection and wondering what is wrong with you?
I get rejected more now than I did before. I think it's because I try more now, but it actually hurts worse than it did. I still have a long way to go weight loss wise, but it's annoying that I have worse luck than I did when I was bigger
I didn't even get my first partner until I was 25!
Same here!0 -
I feel the same way a lot, and I either end up overeating or undereating when I feel like this. It feels like a massive cycle of doom because whenever I lose weight I think 'wow, I still look gross, what's the point' and end up gaining it back again0
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I feel the same way a lot, and I either end up overeating or undereating when I feel like this. It feels like a massive cycle of doom because whenever I lose weight I think 'wow, I still look gross, what's the point' and end up gaining it back again
I just get determined to hit the gym whenever I feel like that.0 -
Hell No! Like getting noticed, and now that I am the size I am, never realized that the vast majority of people that live in my area are very over weight. They walk around in their stretchy pants stuffing cookies in their mouths. I have had them look at me, then look down like they can't look me in the eye while walking past me in the mall. That is definately Not My Problem!0
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Yep, because losing weight doesn't automatically make me pretty/beautiful/sexy/etc.. The only way to change my ugliness is with surgery.0
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I think everyone has that issue... they always find something they don't like about themselves and sometimes it changes by what catches your eye in the mirror....my hangup is the scale more than the mirror...I am at the point where I'm actually gaining because it is turning to muscle however mentally it makes me think I'm getting fat...if that makes sense...So to avoid it I don't weigh myself anymore I just go by how my clothes fit.0
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I 90% of the time feel pretty, even 50lbs ago I still felt pretty I'm still about 60lbs away from my goal weight, but I never really think of myself as being ugly in person. I'm very critical when it comes to pictures of me though. Its like I see something different when I look in the mirrior, but if the same image is captured in a picture I hate it and rip it apart. I guess thats kind of a double answer. Pretty in person but not in a picture.0
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This is such a powerful topic. Title really does sum up the pain we all feel based on childhoods/years of teasing, bullying, self-loathing, and "mirror avoidance." When we choose to eat less, and hopefully healthier choices, allow our muscles to stretch and grow to support health, and our bodies physically change--our emotional center has a hard time catching up. But, just like we make daily choices to change the exterior, we need to change the interior as well.
This applies to boys/men, too, but I read a great article about how we as parents can stop feeding the body image issues in our daughters by changing how we praise them.
Instead of, "oh, you're so pretty!" Or "you are just cute as a button" or "you look gorgeous" we should try to say specific health centered praise--like, "your hair is so shiny and healthy!", "your legs are so strong and powerful from your sport" or "I am so impressed with how you carry yourself with poise at your recital" or "your friendly smile just lights up the room!"
I'll tell you, it takes conscious effort for me to think of specific praise instead of generic physical beauty praise for my darling daughter, but I sure hope she carries the subconscious memories of that instead of seeing herself as simply "pretty."
Long wind aside, perhaps we could all benefit from avoiding the pretty or handsome or fat or thin trap when looking in the mirror and make a conscious effort to tell ourselves positive statements that support our new lifestyle...
Proof that I need to work on positive self-praise? I can't think of anything right now to say nice about myself without feeling super hokey. Sigh. Baby steps...2 -
am on the same boat. Although i lost almost 20 pounds, half way to reach my goal, i still see my oldie in the mirror. My mind still hasn't accepted the change...0
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Yep, because losing weight doesn't automatically make me pretty/beautiful/sexy/etc.. The only way to change my ugliness is with surgery.
Don't you dare! 132lbs lost makes you a damn sight healthier!!0 -
I guess it all depends on how things progressed for you. I am back to the size I was in high school. It was in my 40s that my waist size increased over my pants length. Having been a 30 X 30 the majority of my life, that was my barometer. When I got to 35 X 30, and saw a picture of myself, where I thought I was holding my stomach in, that I knew something had to be done. (The picture is posted in my profile. It's not hard to pick out which one it is).0
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Just FYI, it goes for people in the other direction as well......it does for me anyways....
I came out of HS ~135 lbs, and 6'0"......
So as others have mentioned, I guess we (myself included) need to be thankful of who we are and where we are first......
Then take care of the cosmetic stuff second......
Just keep your goals in mind, and keep pushing ahead. :drinker:
Be happy with where you have come from and where you are......it could always be far worse.1 -
Just FYI, it goes for people in the other direction as well......it does for me anyways....
I came out of HS ~135 lbs, and 6'0"......
So as others have mentioned, I guess we (myself included) need to be thankful of who we are and where we are first......
Then take care of the cosmetic stuff second......
Just keep your goals in mind, and keep pushing ahead. :drinker:
Be happy with where you have come from and where you are......it could always be far worse.
A physique like that, you should be delighted! *jealous*1 -
Just FYI, it goes for people in the other direction as well......it does for me anyways....
I came out of HS ~135 lbs, and 6'0"......
So as others have mentioned, I guess we (myself included) need to be thankful of who we are and where we are first......
Then take care of the cosmetic stuff second......
Just keep your goals in mind, and keep pushing ahead. :drinker:
Be happy with where you have come from and where you are......it could always be far worse.
A physique like that, you should be delighted! *jealous*
Don't get me wrong, I am proud of where I am, and what I am able to do.....
But as you pointed out in the first post......you still feel ugly or unattractive.....
So I still feel that way as well.....I still see myself as I was back in my younger years.
So for me, I am trying to accept where I am and be thankful for that....
I would love to have a physique like Gregg Plitt, or Jeff Seid.......but that I doubt will ever happen.....just not my body type I guess....0 -
Just the other day I was sitting in my hair stylist chair. She was going on and on about how great I'm looking. I finally told her that yes I'm down nearly 60lbs. But when I look in the mirror I still see the same fat size tight 22 pants person. (I am now a size 16) I've seen so many amazing NSV's. And yet I can't let go of the delusions of the mirror. Perhaps it's because we know our "ick" areas and when we look in that mirror or eyes will immediately go to those spots. For me it's my hips and my thighs and I KNOW that's where I look first. I still have 60lbs more to lose in this journey and I'm working really hard at accepting the things about my body that I just can not change. I can lose every single pound. But I will still see my hips and thighs as ugly! We need to embrace our bodies as a whole. After all we have all been blessed with the good and the bad of both our parents! It's a daily struggle. But I for one am working on it!!
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I feel exactly the same, but, to be honest, I knew it all along. I knew that losing weight wouldn't have made me happy, or satisfied.
I feel better than I did before, but since the self hate and dissatisfaction were almost overwhelming, I think it would have been difficult to feel even worse than that. I think I am "prettier" than I was, but this doesn't make me pretty, or good-looking, or thin or anything else at all. It's easy to feel slightly better if you're starting for your worst point.
The only thing that actually got better is that I can deal with it now. When I was 15 kgs heavier, I couldn't bear it, there was literally nothing I could think about to cheer myself up. Now, I have some moments in which I'm actually okay, so those moments keep me going.
I still have some hard times. When I look in the mirror I don't like myself, I still describe myself as fat, I still feel ugly, but I reckon I've made and I'm making everything I can to look and feel at my best. I'm pretty sure this sensation will never go away, because I've never been proud of myself, but I wonder, is anyone really proud of themselves all the time? I doubt it. If I can deal with my issues like anyone else would, if I can live like any other human being, then I've succeeded, I've reached my goal. It doesn't matter how much I have to bear if I can actually bear it.0 -
I'm there with ya'! I've lost 111 pounds from my heaviest weight (355) to my current weight (244), I can run for miles straight, I'm in the best physical shape of my life, I'm the smallest I've ever been as an adult (32 years old), and I am STILL DISGUSTED every time I look in the mirror. I don't ever think I'll be satisfied with my progress. All I see are the areas that I can't seem to impact or change. It DOES push me harder, but I think it's a negative thing. To me, it's a 'Lose/Lose/Lose' scenario.
You're not alone.0
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