Why did the person above you dump you?

sti1imatic

She was out of my league

LouLouStBijou

I was too old for him

kotarea

He constantly told me I was out of his league, He went to go play baseball somewhere else..... I stood in a field alone

capnrus789

Ripped a wet fart during sexy times. Sorry 'bout that.

FabulousFantasticFifty

I told him he was Gross!!!

shankasaurus

She doesn't like dinosaurs. Or cats.

DenDweller

I don't like dinosaurs, cats, or golf.

WhatAnAss

He found out about my cat gif obsession

shankasaurus

All those cat gifs made me so THIRSTY that she could smell the desperation. Not attractive. I still love her and the cat gifs tho.

sti1imatic

She said I ate like a child.

kimdyj

I look too innocent

diespel

her hips didnt fit..

shankasaurus

She said I ate like a child.

How would I know? Your diary is closed.

He didn't like it when I tried to eat his thighs because they look so delicious.

kimdyj

Because I'm not a cat person

sti1imatic

I look too innocent

I have been known to change that.

kimdyj

Cus I don't have any tattoos...

Chalk_Slinger

Because she ALWAYS has gas from her "healthy diet" and denies farting in her sleep so I recorded her nightly explosions and used a lighter to set one aflame as proof, burning down the curtains and the sheets her mother gave us for the wedding.

kimdyj

LMAO!!! U promise you wouldn't tell!!!

Chalk_Slinger

Look, baby, I am trying to prepare the next person who takes you in. It was not easy!! I mean, you killed the parakeet the night we had Chinese takeout AFTER a Mexican lunch!!!

sti1imatic

Cus I don't have any tattoos...

Nobody is perfect..



JK