Strip clubs for married men?
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I'm always very suprised to hear people say that when they're with their SO, they're always thinking of their SO. Even when the boyfriend and I are getting busy, sometimes I think about other people .. and I know he does too. I mean, really, don't you folks think about what someone else looks like naked? I do, and then sometimes I think about what it would be like to be naked with them. Not because I don't love my boyfriend's body, and what he does with it, but because it's just natural to me to be curious about others.0
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Who's husband said "I don't like looking at other women naked."? LOL Mine didn't, he just doesn't rutinely pay them to stand in front of him and get there, and I'm glad.If your husband says he doesn't like looking at other women naked, he is either a homosexual, or a liar, which would you rather be married to ladies? Guys that can't admit to their wives that they find other women attractive are the first ones to cheat...............food for thought...............
If it's not how you guys roll, good for you, differnet strokes for different folks!
But no, I'm not worried that my dh is gay because he doesn't frequent strip clubs. LOL As the lady who has sex with him all the time, I can comfortably answer that.
What ever happened to good old fashioned porn on the computer? LOL0 -
Who's husband said "I don't like looking at other women naked."? LOL Mine didn't, he just doesn't rutinely pay them to stand in front of him and get there, and I'm glad.If your husband says he doesn't like looking at other women naked, he is either a homosexual, or a liar, which would you rather be married to ladies? Guys that can't admit to their wives that they find other women attractive are the first ones to cheat...............food for thought...............
If it's not how you guys roll, good for you, differnet strokes for different folks! But no, I'm not worried that my dh is gay because he doesn't frequent strip clubs. LOL As the lady who has sex with him all the time, I can comfortably answer that.
What ever happened to good old fashioned porn on the computer? LOL
whats the difference? looking at pictures of different girls and masturbating is better than looking at them and not masturbating?0 -
For me, I feel like needing to do it in person is that farther step. If you feel differently, honestly, that's fine! Maybe your favorite color is blue and mine is red, kwim? It's OK for us to have different opinions and view the world a little differently.
Who's husband said "I don't like looking at other women naked."? LOL Mine didn't, he just doesn't rutinely pay them to stand in front of him and get there, and I'm glad.If your husband says he doesn't like looking at other women naked, he is either a homosexual, or a liar, which would you rather be married to ladies? Guys that can't admit to their wives that they find other women attractive are the first ones to cheat...............food for thought...............
If it's not how you guys roll, good for you, differnet strokes for different folks! But no, I'm not worried that my dh is gay because he doesn't frequent strip clubs. LOL As the lady who has sex with him all the time, I can comfortably answer that.
What ever happened to good old fashioned porn on the computer? LOL
whats the difference? looking at pictures of different girls and masturbating is better than looking at them and not masturbating?
Personally, I want my DH to want to do his in person sexual things with me (I don't know if he watched internet porn, that was a JOKE, I would imagine it happens sometimes LOL). Lucky for me, it hasn't caused a problem for us.
It's not an issue in my life. I haven't really analysed my reasons, and since it's never caused an issue, I'm fine with that. But, a lot of people have said "I" (general) must be really insecure it I don't love the idea of my husband paying other women to get naked. Maybe it does stem from my insecurity-- not that he'd have sex with them, but that he'd compare me later if I was dancing or something to that effect. SO WHAT? Kwim? Why is it so bothersome to some posters if I don't feel like I'd look super hot if the imagine in your head was a 22 year old who hasn't had a few babies? SO WHAT? Maybe he just respects that, if it's not a problem for us, why is it a problem for posters here?
Like I said, I haven't psychoanalysed it. But yeah, I guess I am insecure in that way! Regardless of that or other reasoning, If my husband is happy, and I am, well, I guess it's OK, even if it isn't enough for strangers on the internet. LOL0 -
Its been my experience...seeing two of my friends and their relationships have issues with this.....that saying 'no you can't do that' seals the fate of the issue and most times the relationship.
The first relationship, was the female going on her turning of age birthday and her boyfriend flipped out. Within a few months she had gone a handful of times to show him he didn't control her. She never crossed lines...I went most of the times and can say she was a 'good girl'. But, that is how that played out and ultimately played a fairly big part in them breaking up.
Another relationship, this was the guy. He was going, fairly regularly as a single guy and wanted to continue as time allowed once he got serious with this girlfriend. She told him she wasn't a huge fan of him going now that he was in a relationship, but she wasn't going to demand that he stop...it was something he enjoyed before she came along. He went 2 or 3 times after and then stopped altogether. I guess knowing it was 'allowed' curbed some of his interest.....and his interests probably changed some too. But, there was such a drastic difference in the two relationships and the outcome of this topic.0 -
My hubs and I are really old fashioned - he takes me on dates and pays for everything. That's why I love going to strip clubs with him because he always makes it rain.0
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If I ever went to a Strip club it certainly wouldn't be to watch married men - that's a bit too niche for me0
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strip clubs are fun. it's entertainment. i've gone to plenty of them. i have dated strippers. i have gone to strip clubs w/ ppl i'm dating. it's no different than any other show, IMO. You go in, you get entertained, you pay for the fun, and then you go home. Guys LOVE going with me, b/c a girl at the table will get more attention, and the dancer will get more money for it. and i LOVE going to gay strip clubs with my mo's, i get hit on by so many strippers then! (rule of thumb for male strippers: those working in straight clubs are gay and those working in gay clubs are straight).
i don't see the big deal. but then i'm pretty open about sexuality.
that said, at the end of the day, this is like any other question that orbits the issue of fidelity: it has to be decided and agreed on in the couple.0 -
My husband doesn't go to strip clubs out of respect for me-- I had a previous husband who cheated on me for 6 years and I have trust issues. I've never asked him not to go, he just doesn't. We enjoy each others' company much more anyway. Nothing says I love you like a lap dance from your wife. 0
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*Just stating my opinion, so you don't need to go off if you don't agree.*
I'm not okay with any of it. My belief is that true love and respect in a relationship cannot flourish if you engage in any of that activity. I would never think of doing any of that and I wouldn't stand for a partner doing it. For me, I need someone who just wants me. I should be enough. If I'm not, he can get all of his attention and satisfaction somewhere else, permanently.
I am with you on that as well. My husband used to have a large porn collection due to neglect in his first marriage and it was a constant issue between him and I. There were other issues surrounding his addiction and luckily he dealt with it. We have now been married 12 years but it was hard. I have the same belief as you, he should be satisfied with me.
I told him that since he wants to look at someone naked and I can't be there all the time, we took some risque pictures of each other and he has them to look at anytime. I feel better knowing it's my body he's looking at.0 -
"that said, at the end of the day, this is like any other question that orbits the issue of fidelity: it has to be decided and agreed on in the couple"
This, exactly Each couple has to make this decision together, no matter what the "norm" is or what other people say. 0 -
^^^This...I agree with 100%...its fun to be entertained by others once in awhile...plus they get the motor running so its always a plus for us!!!!!
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If their prioritys are in order they will NOT want to be anywhere near a strip club. I 100% disagree with anyone participating in them married or not. That stuff is not for everyones eyes... cover yourself up!
Thank you.
I remember having an argument with my husband when we were dating because I made a comment about strip clubs. Not that he was a big supporter, he just didn't see the big deal.
A week later he was invited to a friends birthday and when the phone call came in, he said "why do I need to go to a club? Look what I have here" and he hung up.
That was the last strip club discussion we had in our 4 years together.... he doesn't go to bars, clubs, anything....
He's a husband and a dad, those are his main priorities... and for fun he works on cars or goes to tracks with the guys... no need to be watching naked women parade around... and when I go out I give him the same respect.
Sounds like you got a good one! Good for him for standing up!
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What ever happened to good old fashioned porn on the computer? LOL
Trust me, the porn on the internet is not old fashioned. :bigsmile:0 -
Nope, not acceptable for us. IMHO, loyalty to your spouse demands that you don't go elsewhere for your needs, visual or otherwise. Same goes for porn, soap operas that depict the grass always being greener on the other side, and flirting. I choose love and loyalty to the man I married and the father of my children. We were married when I was 19, and have just celebrated 16 years married and loving it!0
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There was a time in my life before marriage where I went to strip clubs all the time, worked in them, dated dancers, the whole thing. My wife knows this, and because of that I haven't been a single time since we've been together. When we first started dating, she was uncomfortable a few times when we ran across dancers that I'd dated in the past - though she has nothing to be concerned about in that area.
She would never tell me I couldn't go, but I know that she wouldn't like it so I don't go. It's a respect thing. I suppose I would go with a bachelor party, but I'm at an age now where all my friends are already married so it's never come up.0
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