Nice/Romantic Gesture OR Trying Too Hard

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  • UsedToBeHusky
    UsedToBeHusky Posts: 15,229 Member
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    One day I was making my daughter dinner. It was pouring rain outside and I glanced out the back door. Someone was standing outside! I go to the door, and here it is this guy who took me out a few times who I had pretty much blew off. He was too nice. He was too touchy--always wanted to hold my hand or have his hand on my leg. urg.. I open the door and askedwhy he was there. He held out a bottle of cranberry juice and said "I came here to give you this" (I had been having health issues and the doctor was having me drink a lot of cranberry juice. I asked him if he wanted to cvome in. He said "no. Just wanted to let you know I was thinking of you". He lived an hour away from me!!

    I was so blown away by it in a creepy, then not so creepy way. Yeah, it was creepy, but I knew he was just trying to be sweet.

    He's my husband of 13years. We rarely argue and have an awesome family, business, house, etc.

    I'd take the roses happily.

    OMG! Such a beautiful story! Congrats to you both! :heart:
  • billsica
    billsica Posts: 4,741 Member
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    Women can be difficult!
    Agreed.

    Its stuff like this that makes me want to switch teams.
  • UsedToBeHusky
    UsedToBeHusky Posts: 15,229 Member
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    Too much too soon?
    Jesus, you would think he was asking her to be engaged or that he tried f*cking her. Hell, maybe he did *kitten* her on the first date ( you never know these days!) but the flowers are just too much.

    This is a problem with some women. They are too picky. They b*tch, moan, and cry that they can't have a nice guy who is fond of them being thoughtful. Then when someone does something thoughtful like this, the b*tch, moan, and cry that it's too much.

    I agree but I still think the chick is a fool. It had to be something else. I know if I liked a guy and he made a gesture that I thought was "too much" then I would just tell him. I wouldn't totally cut the guy off.

    I totally disagree. after 12 years of marraige things that when we first met i though were kinda cute albiet a little annoying now are major issues that were just under the surface..... Just sayin... you cant be sucked in see it for what it is.

    It's a guy with flowers! I'm just saying... what more could be read into that.
  • CandeesLand
    CandeesLand Posts: 200
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    I think that if the only thing she is basing his being-over-the-topness on is the flowers than that is crazy. More likely, it was a bunch of things that were said and done that made her feel that way and the flowers just pushed her over the edge. I think flowers or lots of other small gifts, at any time, first date or 500th date, show that someone went out of their way to show you that they were thinking of you/care about you. It may be wise to try to guage how a woman feels about flowers in general and certian flowers before you spend money on a dozen roses though.
  • auticus
    auticus Posts: 1,051 Member
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    I feel so sorry for single guys, women are so bloody difficult sometimes. :angry:

    This is one main reason I've been mostly single for the past 9 years.
  • KimmieBrie
    KimmieBrie Posts: 825 Member
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    I don't know that I feel sorry for the guy... she just didn't like him. It was the 2nd date. I think it was more than the flowers but
    does it really matter? Half the women here saying they want to meet him might run at date 2 as well. Not all nice men and women hit it off. Maybe he left wishing he had never given her the flowers and never intended to call her again....you just never know....

    but we women sure are good at over analyzing things!
  • galegetsthin
    galegetsthin Posts: 1,352 Member
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    Because nothing says "undying love" better than a plant cut off from its roots destined for an early grave! I like getting flowers, but just a few. Not a lot of them. When I come home sometimes and there is a rose in a cup for me, it makes me all giggly. But not on the 2nd date. I would be a bit creeped out too.
  • april_beth
    april_beth Posts: 617 Member
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    One day I was making my daughter dinner. It was pouring rain outside and I glanced out the back door. Someone was standing outside! I go to the door, and here it is this guy who took me out a few times who I had pretty much blew off. He was too nice. He was too touchy--always wanted to hold my hand or have his hand on my leg. urg.. I open the door and askedwhy he was there. He held out a bottle of cranberry juice and said "I came here to give you this" (I had been having health issues and the doctor was having me drink a lot of cranberry juice. I asked him if he wanted to cvome in. He said "no. Just wanted to let you know I was thinking of you". He lived an hour away from me!!

    I was so blown away by it in a creepy, then not so creepy way. Yeah, it was creepy, but I knew he was just trying to be sweet.

    He's my husband of 13years. We rarely argue and have an awesome family, business, house, etc.

    I'd take the roses happily.


    awwww, way freaking creepy but awwww, i love the ending :)
  • infamousmk
    infamousmk Posts: 6,033 Member
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    Too much too soon?
    Jesus, you would think he was asking her to be engaged or that he tried f*cking her. Hell, maybe he did *kitten* her on the first date ( you never know these days!) but the flowers are just too much.

    This is a problem with some women. They are too picky. They b*tch, moan, and cry that they can't have a nice guy who is fond of them being thoughtful. Then when someone does something thoughtful like this, the b*tch, moan, and cry that it's too much.


    I agree but I still think the chick is a fool. It had to be something else. I know if I liked a guy and he made a gesture that I thought was "too much" then I would just tell him. I wouldn't totally cut the guy off.

    I totally disagree. after 12 years of marraige things that when we first met i though were kinda cute albiet a little annoying now are major issues that were just under the surface..... Just sayin... you cant be sucked in see it for what it is.

    Pretty sure the woman hasn't had time in one date to decide if the flower dude has any kind of quirks she would even have to consider whether or not she could live with for the rest of her life. It's a second date, not a prenup...
  • LissaAlice
    LissaAlice Posts: 10
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    Would you not rather have a guy that gave you flowers then a guy that couldn't even be bothered to put the though in....he seems very sweet, as is obviously very into her if he's doing this on the second date, I'd say even if it doesn't work out in the end, at least he's trying to pull his weight in the relationship.
  • infamousmk
    infamousmk Posts: 6,033 Member
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    I don't know that I feel sorry for the guy... she just didn't like him. It was the 2nd date. I think it was more than the flowers but
    does it really matter? Half the women here saying they want to meet him might run at date 2 as well. Not all nice men and women hit it off. Maybe he left wishing he had never given her the flowers and never intended to call her again....you just never know....

    but we women sure are good at over analyzing things!

    Again, if there was more to it than the flowers, why doesn't the woman just say, "He chewed with his mouth open." or "Turns out he was a bigot" ..... why make it about the ONE KIND GESTURE?? It's a freaking mind game and it's bullsh!t and it's exactly the thing I don't like about a lot of women.
  • the_journeyman
    the_journeyman Posts: 1,877 Member
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    My wife would rather me just pick her some redneck roses (wildflowers or similar)

    JM
  • shanolap
    shanolap Posts: 1,204 Member
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    Sounds like the guy got lucky that night! He doesn't have to deal with her ever again and hopefully he will find someone who will appreciate him and his kind gestures.
  • ItsCasey
    ItsCasey Posts: 4,022 Member
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    Yet another example of what's wrong with men these days ... women are offended by chivalry. A man does what a man SHOULD do (bring flowers to a woman he likes), he gets screwed over because woman thinks it's "creepy," and he never does it again, thereby ruining the experience for the next woman, who might have appreciated the gesture.

    Seriously, it's just a bouquet of flowers, not a marriage proposal. Sounds to me like this chick needs to get over herself.
  • Elizabeth_C34
    Elizabeth_C34 Posts: 6,376 Member
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    I feel sorry for the guy. Sounds like he liked her quite a bit and was just trying to be romantic. Sucks that the next girl he dates probably won't get the same treatment because she shot him down this time.
  • rml_16
    rml_16 Posts: 16,414 Member
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    Something like that would make me feel weird about the guy, but if everything else was kosher, I wouldn't dump him over it. My guess is there was more to it, even if it was subtle. If he was an otherwise great guy and she dumped him over that, then he's better off without her, anyway.
  • rossi02
    rossi02 Posts: 549 Member
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    If the flowers pushed her away, then she must not have been into him to begin with. Like someone else had said, if she had felt that instant conection with him, she would have thought it was the sweetest thing ever.
  • BobbyClerici
    BobbyClerici Posts: 813 Member
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    Yep, he blew it.
    Too much too soon. This poor guy knows nothing about women.
  • Legalchica
    Legalchica Posts: 462
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    Too much too soon?
    Jesus, you would think he was asking her to be engaged or that he tried f*cking her. Hell, maybe he did *kitten* her on the first date ( you never know these days!) but the flowers are just too much.

    This is a problem with some women. They are too picky. They b*tch, moan, and cry that they can't have a nice guy who is fond of them being thoughtful. Then when someone does something thoughtful like this, the b*tch, moan, and cry that it's too much.

    I agree but I still think the chick is a fool. It had to be something else. I know if I liked a guy and he made a gesture that I thought was "too much" then I would just tell him. I wouldn't totally cut the guy off.

    I totally disagree. after 12 years of marraige things that when we first met i though were kinda cute albiet a little annoying now are major issues that were just under the surface..... Just sayin... you cant be sucked in see it for what it is.

    It's a guy with flowers! I'm just saying... what more could be read into that.

    after just meeting him??? a lot... maybe I'm just to paranoid and cynical now... but thats ok.
  • jsteffen80
    jsteffen80 Posts: 136
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    I first gave my wife flowers on our first wedding anniversary. She got one red rose. She will get one more each year we're married.

    Guys have it rough... women send some messed up signals... but a dozen roses on the second date is just thick.

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