Nice/Romantic Gesture OR Trying Too Hard

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  • IronmanPanda
    IronmanPanda Posts: 2,083 Member
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    If anyone wants to bring me a dozen of red roses, please feel free to. I will appreciate them. :)

    On the way! :flowerforyou:
  • lizziebeth1028
    lizziebeth1028 Posts: 3,602 Member
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    A dozen roses is too extravagant for a second date....the guy would have come off pretentious to me.
  • Elizabeth_C34
    Elizabeth_C34 Posts: 6,376 Member
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    Funny, I remember every show growing up basically taught you to be romantic, that women loved receving flowers ,especially for no reason! Even candy!...and now you see charm bracelets are coming back around. Your girl wearing your class ring with a boatload of string wrapped around it so it would fit them. They were proud to wear it, they bragged about it to their girlfriends, or so we thought they did anyway. You held hands on your way to class, got the door for them wether it was a building door or car door. You let them sit down first and got their chair for them. You would sit and talk for hours at night, not text, talk! The tv shows back then made you believe in true love and romance...you would make a compilation of love songs for them as a gift, let them have one of your shirts that had your cologne on it because they said they would wear it or sleep with it at night.
    Romance....goes back to being the nice guy and never getting the girl you wanted...you just wanted her to like you, you wanted her heart to melt when you gave her something hoping she understood the sentiment behind it...show her appreciation for being with you, always labeled as cheesy, but in your heart you thought you were sweeping her off her feet....just being a hopeless romantic....
    Now these things like that are frowned upon.Your scrutinized for your efforts...instead of the sentiment behind it getting the attention it should deserve. Its sad really....just my opinion...

    I still like those things. One thing my husband did when we dated was to renew my interest in romance. It's fun to have a little of it along the way.
  • try2basunbeam
    try2basunbeam Posts: 128
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    Funny, I remember every show growing up basically taught you to be romantic, that women loved receving flowers ,especially for no reason! Even candy!...and now you see charm bracelets are coming back around. Your girl wearing your class ring with a boatload of string wrapped around it so it would fit them. They were proud to wear it, they bragged about it to their girlfriends, or so we thought they did anyway. You held hands on your way to class, got the door for them wether it was a building door or car door. You let them sit down first and got their chair for them. You would sit and talk for hours at night, not text, talk! The tv shows back then made you believe in true love and romance...you would make a compilation of love songs for them as a gift, let them have one of your shirts that had your cologne on it because they said they would wear it or sleep with it at night.
    Romance....goes back to being the nice guy and never getting the girl you wanted...you just wanted her to like you, you wanted her heart to melt when you gave her something hoping she understood the sentiment behind it...show her appreciation for being with you, always labeled as cheesy, but in your heart you thought you were sweeping her off her feet....just being a hopeless romantic....
    Now these things like that are frowned upon.Your scrutinized for your efforts...instead of the sentiment behind it getting the attention it should deserve. Its sad really....just my opinion...

    As the girl with the creepy dating story posted earlier who is married to said creepy guy...I stay in my pjs as long as I can so I can smell him on my shoulder...:blushing:
  • Elizabeth_C34
    Elizabeth_C34 Posts: 6,376 Member
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    If anyone wants to bring me a dozen of red roses, please feel free to. I will appreciate them. :)

    I'm married, but me too! I'll appreciate them and it'll make my day!
  • Scott613
    Scott613 Posts: 2,317 Member
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    Funny, I remember every show growing up basically taught you to be romantic, that women loved receving flowers ,especially for no reason! Even candy!...and now you see charm bracelets are coming back around. Your girl wearing your class ring with a boatload of string wrapped around it so it would fit them. They were proud to wear it, they bragged about it to their girlfriends, or so we thought they did anyway. You held hands on your way to class, got the door for them wether it was a building door or car door. You let them sit down first and got their chair for them. You would sit and talk for hours at night, not text, talk! The tv shows back then made you believe in true love and romance...you would make a compilation of love songs for them as a gift, let them have one of your shirts that had your cologne on it because they said they would wear it or sleep with it at night.
    Romance....goes back to being the nice guy and never getting the girl you wanted...you just wanted her to like you, you wanted her heart to melt when you gave her something hoping she understood the sentiment behind it...show her appreciation for being with you, always labeled as cheesy, but in your heart you thought you were sweeping her off her feet....just being a hopeless romantic....
    Now these things like that are frowned upon.Your scrutinized for your efforts...instead of the sentiment behind it getting the attention it should deserve. Its sad really....just my opinion...
    While nice guy Mike is getting the flowers Billy badass just handed her a pack of condoms and said you know you want to......She did......Billy badass dumped her shortly after for her better looking friend. Mike is at the gun store asking the clerk to keep his gun on hold till he's 18.
  • CalJur
    CalJur Posts: 627 Member
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    dozen roses on second date? too fast player. slow your roll. patience is a virtue.
  • Blasian29
    Blasian29 Posts: 27
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    I have had guys come pick me up for a first date with a bouquet of flowers. I love flowers! I think it makes a good impression when a date brings flowers. I will admit that I am old fashioned, and my husband still opens doors and pulls out chairs for me, but he still brings home a bouquet of flowers for me every now and then, and I love it just as much now as I did on our first date.
  • bloodguilt
    bloodguilt Posts: 126
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    My friend went on a date with a guy, all went well and he called to take her out for a second date. He showed up at her house to pick her up and had a dozen red roses for her. She called to tell me that she went on the second date, then told him no more. She felt he was trying too hard, it was too much too soon. In my opinion, they are just flowers. It was a nice gesture, but maybe a bunch of daisies or single rose or two wouldn't have been read into they way she did. Thoughts??? Dating is hard enough as it is and I really feel for the guys out there. Women can be difficult! :flowerforyou:

    "Women can be difficult!"
  • havingitall
    havingitall Posts: 3,728 Member
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    sighs.....Poor men!! They just can't catch a break no matter how hard they try....This makes me sad

    I agree.... I guess it would have been better if he sat in the driveway and honked the horn for her to come out
  • TankGirl71
    TankGirl71 Posts: 241 Member
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    Wanna know what creepy is? When a guy tattoos your name on his arm five days after meeting you. True story. (I would have preferred some roses)
  • JustLindaLou
    JustLindaLou Posts: 376 Member
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    Well he better dang well better bring me flowers on the first date!!......expensive jewelery wouldnt hurt either......

    Now you're talking!!!!! LOL
  • Elizabeth_C34
    Elizabeth_C34 Posts: 6,376 Member
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    Funny, I remember every show growing up basically taught you to be romantic, that women loved receving flowers ,especially for no reason! Even candy!...and now you see charm bracelets are coming back around. Your girl wearing your class ring with a boatload of string wrapped around it so it would fit them. They were proud to wear it, they bragged about it to their girlfriends, or so we thought they did anyway. You held hands on your way to class, got the door for them wether it was a building door or car door. You let them sit down first and got their chair for them. You would sit and talk for hours at night, not text, talk! The tv shows back then made you believe in true love and romance...you would make a compilation of love songs for them as a gift, let them have one of your shirts that had your cologne on it because they said they would wear it or sleep with it at night.
    Romance....goes back to being the nice guy and never getting the girl you wanted...you just wanted her to like you, you wanted her heart to melt when you gave her something hoping she understood the sentiment behind it...show her appreciation for being with you, always labeled as cheesy, but in your heart you thought you were sweeping her off her feet....just being a hopeless romantic....
    Now these things like that are frowned upon.Your scrutinized for your efforts...instead of the sentiment behind it getting the attention it should deserve. Its sad really....just my opinion...
    While nice guy Mike is getting the flowers Billy badass just handed her a pack of condoms and said you know you want to......She did......Billy badass dumped her shortly after for her better looking friend. Mike is at the gun store asking the clerk to keep his gun on hold till he's 18.

    The girls Billy Badass picks up are the same ones *****ing that they can't find a good man too. That's the really pathetic part of it. Too many women go for the bad boys then blame THEM when the guy turns out, (SURPRISE) to be a *kitten*. DUH!
  • zenzoes
    zenzoes Posts: 187
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    Funny, I remember every show growing up basically taught you to be romantic, that women loved receving flowers ,especially for no reason! Even candy!...and now you see charm bracelets are coming back around. Your girl wearing your class ring with a boatload of string wrapped around it so it would fit them. They were proud to wear it, they bragged about it to their girlfriends, or so we thought they did anyway. You held hands on your way to class, got the door for them wether it was a building door or car door. You let them sit down first and got their chair for them. You would sit and talk for hours at night, not text, talk! The tv shows back then made you believe in true love and romance...you would make a compilation of love songs for them as a gift, let them have one of your shirts that had your cologne on it because they said they would wear it or sleep with it at night.
    Romance....goes back to being the nice guy and never getting the girl you wanted...you just wanted her to like you, you wanted her heart to melt when you gave her something hoping she understood the sentiment behind it...show her appreciation for being with you, always labeled as cheesy, but in your heart you thought you were sweeping her off her feet....just being a hopeless romantic....
    Now these things like that are frowned upon.Your scrutinized for your efforts...instead of the sentiment behind it getting the attention it should deserve. Its sad really....just my opinion...
    I love this :) It reminds me of my first love in high school. That feeling was so amazing. So amazing that many years later we sought each other out listened to old mixed tapes we gave each other back then. We've been totally in love for years and I still wear his shirts to bed :) Great post!!
  • Rikki444
    Rikki444 Posts: 326 Member
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    I looked up the definition of the word 'romance' online (WM Online) and one of the definitions reads:

    "to try to influence or curry favor with especially by lavishing personal attention, gifts, or flattery"

    This is why some of us are very turned off by 'romance'..... it's just not 'real'. Because this was only the second date, there is no way to know the motivation of the poor guy.... but I can see why your friend read into this as 'trying to influence her' or... 'trying too hard'.

    Dating is difficult for both parties.... I.DO.KNOW.... but eventually, all things fit in. At the end of the day, it is not the gesture that turned her off.... she's just not that into him and accepting flowers is leading him on....because it is lovely to get flowers from the man you love..... I.DO.KNOW.
    :flowerforyou:
  • Becoming_A_Butterfly
    Becoming_A_Butterfly Posts: 2,534 Member
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    I would be flattered if a man brought me roses on a second date. It's sweet.

    I don't feel sorry for men and don't buy into "women are so difficult" mindset of much of this thread. Both my boyfriend and I liked each other; made it known we liked each other; and didn't play any stupid games or expect each other to read minds as a form of communication. It works for us. I suspect it would work for a lot of people if they just grew up and showed respect to their partner.
  • ElizabethRoad
    ElizabethRoad Posts: 5,138 Member
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    What is so difficult about this subject, exactly? I know: you want a one-size-fits-all gift that will automatically please any woman. Sorry to break the news, but women are individual people with individual tastes and preferences. One woman may want a dozen roses, and the next woman may not. Romance requires getting to know the person, and knowing what will make her happy. If flowers will make her happy, then you get her flowers. If it's something else, then do that. Shoving a bouquet at someone without bothering to find out if it's appropriate is not romantic; it's what you do when you want to exert the minimum effort possible and still get laid.
  • Miss_Chievous_wechange
    Miss_Chievous_wechange Posts: 1,230 Member
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    If roses are too forward for a second date, wonder what that means about what I usually get on a second date...er, nevermind. :blushing:
  • BeesKnees181
    BeesKnees181 Posts: 166 Member
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    If it's right...it's right. You just know. And no amount of flowers can make it more or less so.
  • mdelcott
    mdelcott Posts: 529 Member
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    Wow Women!!! This fear of flowers on a second date is the reason the majority of men now days thinks a romantic evening is a bucket of KFC and a case of beer. Lighten up

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