In love with flatmate, what to do?

PrincessGlitterTush · January 2012

Thats cute...but don't make the first move...let him do that !

^^^Agreed.. Do the dinner - but let him make a move first.. Good luck hun x

PrincessGlitterTush · January 2012

I understood that to mean 'on the dinner date'???? Am i wrong.. ?

_Angie · January 2012

I understood that to mean 'on the dinner date'???? Am i wrong.. ?

I guess he should make the first move

Now to get something appropriate to wear

Jaxster12 · January 2012

I understood that to mean 'on the dinner date'???? Am i wrong.. ?

I guess he should make the first move Now to get something appropriate to wear

Go naked and I can promise you he will make the first move!

PrincessGlitterTush · January 2012

GOOD LUCK !!!

Andylee63 · January 2012

Just go for it girl.. What is the worst that could happen

grantacconda · January 2012

Get drunk together.. go in for a kiss... If it fails you can always just say sorry about last night i was drunk

Articeluvsmemphis · January 2012

aww that's sweet, but you don't have to be elaborate, just do it

Kirsty_UK · January 2012

This thread makes me smile :flowerforyou:

BrettPGH · January 2012

Awww kiss him honey!

This is me being the little old lady across the hall.

Kymmu · January 2012

Dinner and lots of wine...it's a truth serum.....If he doesn't have the same feelings at least the next day you can blame the wine for your little emotional outburst!

balungile · January 2012

I think dinner is fine but no candles and stuff like that. If he doesn't feel the same way the rest of the romantic dinner will be terrible. Rather cook and dish as you normally do. Buy the wine yes. I'm a fan of truth in these things so I would vote for telling him in a not so crazy way, like saying "Look we've leave together for this long and I think I have developed feelings for you. If you don't feel the same way its fine. I just thought I should let you know so that I don't look back in 20 years and wonder what could have happened."

Bahet · January 2012

This is such a great thread! I'm hoping it goes really well for you. Don't use the word "love" as that scared guys but let him know you are into him. Also let him know that if he doesn't reciprocate (he'd have to be gay -- you're stunning!) that you value his friendship and don't want him to feel weird about things.

Oh, and wear something sexy tonight.

ArroganceInStep · January 2012

I've had exactly two cases where the girl came onto me and not the other way around. In both those situations they got themselves and me drunk...kissed me...and then went with it. Basically what Kymmu said, except I was a bit of a party animal and so were my friends in college so instead of wine it was usually tequila shots and screwdrivers.

The guys I knew in college who were living with women they weren't seeing saw them as off-limits because THEY didn't want things to get weird. If you're wondering why he hasn't approached you that may be it.

The thing I do have some experience in is how to make the first move. You're worried about getting rejected or messing with your living situation. That's a very real possibility, but the tearing yourself up getting the nerve to do it is probably much worse than whatever he might say or do. Just do it, if it doesn't work out that sucks but then at least you'll know.

fteale · January 2012

I have always been the one to make the first move. I have always wondered a bit why women warn other women off doing that. IME most men are terrified of doing so in case they have misread the signals.

YouAreTheShit · January 2012

Dinner and lots of wine...it's a truth serum.....If he doesn't have the same feelings at least the next day you can blame the wine for your little emotional outburst!

This is actually a good strategy.

Don't mention love though. I would go the route of words that are slightly muted so as not to make him feel pressured to respond the same. Stuff like:

- you're super cool
- you're really sweet
- you're always thoughtful
- you're hot
- you kinda turn me on

More flirty and playful, and less serious and loving.

Good luck and let us know how it goes!

Shelle68 · January 2012

bump just to follow

beezerphd · January 2012

Replying to this thread so I can see the outcome.
Sounds like this guy is definitely into you.
If he does like you then he is a very lucky guy, if he doesn't then he must be blind and dumb as you are gorgeous.

Good luck tonight, but don't go too overboard to quickly.

HisPathDaily · January 2012

Don't make it so complicated ... or hard on yourself. I don't know, maybe I'm weird, but when I was talking with women that I was interested in, and now it's been my wife for over 10 years, just TELL ME WHAT YOU ARE THINKING! lol ... I'm not yelling, just stressing a point

...

I truly wish you luck, and love is beautiful, but DO NOT wait for him to make the move ... for pete's sake just tell him ... dinner, conversation, whatever your comfortable with, but you've obviously been waiting already ... he may be just as uncomfortable ... and if I was talking to him, I'd say the same thing ... but since I'm talking to you, the ball is in your court!

Yes, you can get rejected ... BUT ... I leave you with one question, what may you regret more?

1) Asking him and finding out that the feelings you have are one-way?
2) Years down the road wondering what would have happened if you would have asked?

Take your chance at getting a few bruises ... love is worth it

MadeToCraveHIM · January 2012

I don't even know you dear and I'm excited for you :laugh: I'm a hopeless romantic though! Hope all goes well and definitely keep us all posted. We're all cheering for you :bigsmile:

RyanDanielle5101 · January 2012

Bump to see the outcome!

Indy_Mario · January 2012

This is such a great thread! I'm hoping it goes really well for you. Don't use the word "love" as that scared guys but let him know you are into him. Also let him know that if he doesn't reciprocate (he'd have to be gay -- you're stunning!) that you value his friendship and don't want him to feel weird about things.

Oh, and wear something sexy tonight.

There's nothing wrong with a woman making the first move, although I would try to avoid using the word "love" right away, it might seem a little rushed to him!

If he is doing all those things for you, he's definitely interested and thinks you're someone special (in the good special way). Also, it could be that he's just a super sweet fella, but odds are he takes one look at your pretty face and can't help himself to be swooned by your beauty and kindness.

Be nice, wear something sexy but appropriate (a nice, playful dress), talk about the wonderful things he does for you and how you appreciate them. Let him draw conclusions, but don't be afraid to steer the conversation (just don't monopolize it).

Best of luck to you, he sounds like a winner!

halfsizeheather · January 2012

i was flatmates with my partner and (after about two months of living together) he just came up to me and kissed me. he said he was so nervous he knew he wouldn't be able to get his words out. lol

we are still together eight years later and are getting married later this year.

the way i look at it, i got to know he's bad habits before we got serious and friends first is sometimes better.

good luck.

p.s my guy also cooked the meals- trying to impress me...i'm so lucky he still does it to this day.