In love with flatmate, what to do?

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  • baypathgradLyns
    baypathgradLyns Posts: 639 Member
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    Awww kiss him honey!


    This is me being the little old lady across the hall.

    lol, cute!
  • baypathgradLyns
    baypathgradLyns Posts: 639 Member
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    Please come back and tell us how it went... dying to know the outcome!

    Yes! this! please keep us posted :)
  • baypathgradLyns
    baypathgradLyns Posts: 639 Member
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    IMO, it sounds like he likes you...but I am not an expert on the intentions of men lol
  • erin755
    erin755 Posts: 11
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    I would'nt cookk him a romantic meal, i think it cud b a bit cringy wen uz rnt togher! Wat I wud do,is wen he comes hme from work, surprise him by having a chinese takeout for u both and a dvd! mention that u fot uz cud hav a cosy night for the night! He wont b able to resist a chinese nd A WAR FILM or sumit NOT a chik flik! any way ease the topic into convo like "U wud swear we wer boyfriend girlfriend," (laugh) "look at us sitting all cosy together!" Then say "I wouldn't mind u being my boyfriend, ur so nice." But laff it off, so if he doesnt speak up u no its nt wat he is looking for, nd uz r still frriends bcoz he onli fnks u made a funni remark, nd didnt embarass urself by saying u love him! hope all goes well, let us no wat happens!
  • thea0101
    thea0101 Posts: 54 Member
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    Another thing: I agree about NOT making it look like you did the first move so you don't crash and burn....


    However, there are ways of making the guy make the first move...if you know what I mean, ladies... :drinker: Cheers!
  • determinedsocialworker
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    I started reading the thread hoping it had started a week ago or something and I would get to know the outcome by the end.. but I guess not! LOL Don't make it into some major event or you're going to be all weird and it won't be any fun. Have a glass of wine, make something to eat..chat.. just be you..and add some honesty in there about how you think he's a great guy and you don't expect anything from him but that you are finding yourself having a bit of a crush on him..or you have feelings for him.. whatever you're comfortable with... just see how it goes... and yeah, no mentioning love... unless it's about what you made for dinner! Good luck and yes, I'd like an update so I can live vicariously through you for a bit longer. :)
  • 12skipafew99100
    12skipafew99100 Posts: 1,669 Member
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    Maybe drop a hint like "Wow, I think I could really get into you" when he does something really nice. Do not declair your love for him. Slow, slow, slow. If its meant to be, it will happen. Don't do or say anything you might want to take back later.
  • _Ben
    _Ben Posts: 1,608 Member
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    Based off your initial post, I'd say he already likes you
  • MikeM53082
    MikeM53082 Posts: 1,199 Member
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    late night, drunken hook-up.
  • thea0101
    thea0101 Posts: 54 Member
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    I started reading the thread hoping it had started a week ago or something and I would get to know the outcome by the end.. but I guess not! LOL Don't make it into some major event or you're going to be all weird and it won't be any fun. Have a glass of wine, make something to eat..chat.. just be you..and add some honesty in there about how you think he's a great guy and you don't expect anything from him but that you are finding yourself having a bit of a crush on him..or you have feelings for him.. whatever you're comfortable with... just see how it goes... and yeah, no mentioning love... unless it's about what you made for dinner! Good luck and yes, I'd like an update so I can live vicariously through you for a bit longer. :)

    Your post made me smile. I'm remembering all those times in high school and college..... :flowerforyou:
  • ceilidh92
    ceilidh92 Posts: 22 Member
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    I agree with much of what has been said but I will give an idea of how I would carry the night out as:

    1.) Wear something good looking (complimenting your looks but not look like you’re dressed up too much). Sexy but understated.

    2.) Keep the meal simple because it just adds additional pressure in making it just right. If someone just cooks for me, I love it. It doesn't really matter what it is. It's the gesture of cooking for me & the company they give me.

    3.) Keep the conversation light. Ask about him, what he likes to do or if you already know what he likes to do, ask about what it is that interests him in it. In other words, have him feel like you’re interested in getting to know him better. Make him feel the center of your attention. Hopefully he will return the favor to you and you two get to know much more about each and feel closer, no matter what happens next (dear friend, partner, or ???).

    4.) Mention how fond you are of having such a sweet flatmate and that you really appreciate his gestures of kindness. And that you have other friends that have roommates/flatmates that don’t do this and that is a very appreciated gesture.

    5.) Be cautious about having the night go much further than a kiss & snuggling. Leave the energy build between you and not throw all caution to the wind by doing something that will complicate defining what you to might have. I know I sound a little traditional (which I am rarely myself, believe me), but to protect what you have and try to gentlely build upon it. You must be slow and patient.

    6.) And also above all, keep from over embellishing your feelings for him. To overwhelm with an “I love you” comment, can make for awkwardness for him and a very nervous, potentially crushing situation for you. You can express your sincere adoration for him in this evening’s conversation and then he can absorb it a little and search his own feelings to express to you. By giving him an excuse to think about you, you let nature take its path instead of forcing it down the path you want. Too often people feel pressured in echoing a comment of “I love you”, when they may not be ready to say it. So making it much lighter, brings the feelings to light with a light tap instead of a two-by-four over the head. :wink:

    That is my 2 cents…

    Good Luck,
    David
  • Prozack1964
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    Being open and honest is the only way
  • RedHotChiliSteppers
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    Just go do something fun together and then at the end YOU go in for the kiss.

    If he has feelings for you too he will of course kiss you and love it.

    I have had times where the girl made the first move and it was the best ever. I'd think to myself, I should have just done it earlier a long time ago!
  • bnv08
    bnv08 Posts: 33 Member
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    this is so sweet! i'm sure he has the same feeling but is to afraid to say anything so he is showing his affection through nice gestures. you have to tell him how you feel or else you might regret it forever. i can't wait to see what happens!
  • clarkeje1
    clarkeje1 Posts: 1,637 Member
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    bump
  • warmachinejt
    warmachinejt Posts: 2,167 Member
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    i really like a girl and if she told me she loved me i would melt away inside lol but anyways tell him you like something about him (not what any other girl would say, like the way he does things for you) and ask him out? maybe ask him out first im no expert but thats what i'd like
  • erickirb
    erickirb Posts: 12,293 Member
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    Sneak into his room late at night with nothing on and crawl into his bed. This would surly get his attention.
  • kb455
    kb455 Posts: 679 Member
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    he packs you lunch and gives you chocolates as a nice surprise?!!? thats man speak for "please notice me" I am 90% sure of it. You are smart AND pretty and he clearly cares for you

    I agree. I can't imagine a guy going to that trouble for someone he sees as simply a roommate and nothing more. There's a good chance he feels for you the same way you feel for him. I'd just drop some subtle hints to him and see how he responds.
  • warmachinejt
    warmachinejt Posts: 2,167 Member
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    don't be subtle please cause of lot of us have no clue when you like us, i speak for experience
    TELL HIM
    i only found out 2 girls liked me in HS (back then) but that's cause they TOLD me
    it is very easy to only pass off as nice and not flirting so make clear you're interest (again this is my opinion)
  • MrDude_1
    MrDude_1 Posts: 2,510 Member
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    ooh, its like a real life sitcom.
    bump to see what happens next.