ever been told you werent good looking?

TheKitsune6

Other people have told me, but the worst is that I used to say it to myself. I would look in the mirror and say awful things that I would never say to another human being.

Fortunately, I'm no longer that person.

cici1028

Absolutely. On several occasions. The funny thing is, the way you get treated when you lose the weight is very hard to adjust to. People definitely treat you differently. People are a lot nicer to thinner people I think... and it shows.

Part of that is confidence though, right? When I was overweight my self esteem was LOW (and I had never been the attractive one to start with so...) and when I started feeling better about myself (once I could actually process that I was no longer overweight) I started being more confident. And I think a good attitude definitely attracts more attention.

Shutterpillar

I was bullied relentlessly in middle school. Mostly for my teeth, which are pretty crooked. But I was called ugly also... it was a very awkward and sad time.

High school was no better, as I got myself into an abusive relationship. its been almost 10 years and my self esteem is still affected by how he treated me. Even though I have an amazing husband who thinks the world revolves around me and our family, those moments in my past are hard to get over. I will still feel ashamed every now and then when I look in the mirror.

Someone asked if the bullying was the reason why we are on this site. For me, it may have a small amount to do with it. But most of the reason is because I saw myself gaining weight and I knew that if I didn't stop it right then, it would get out of control and be even harder to lose. I had just come out of a bout of depression as well and I knew I needed to get healthy for both my body and my mind. It was doing me no good to mope on the couch with a sleeve of cookies in my hand.

Mom0fTwo

My former boss continually kept telling me I looked tired... everyday... several times a day.

Eventually, I snapped told HIM that HE looked pregnant and then I quit.

Best way to quit ever!! LMAO

KarateGoddess

When I was a kid I was told I was ugly by a LOT of people and unfortunately I believed them. It's kind of sad actually because it took me until I was in my early 20s to figure out I'm not ugly and all those people who told me I was were idiots - bullies. I really wonder what my life would have been like in elementary through high school had I been stronger and able to shrug off their mean hearted comments. I found my strength though and now I try to share it with others. Don't let anyone tell you you're ugly - anyone who says things like that - they're the ugly ones!

xo_morgan

have you ever been told you weren't good looking? if so, did it bother u? or did you think they were an idiot..
a person who i used to hang out with just as friends - she told me that i wasnt even good looking.

it didnt really bother me, but i was shocked to hear her opinion so bluntly like that haha.
the weird thing is, now she wont leave me alone! she is blowing up my phone with txt and "oh lets hang out this weekend!"
she seems desperate now to "hang out" and i always tell her im busy - ill hang out with her as a group, but it would never be a date, i would NEVER date her because of her shallow personality and she kinda sluts it up....

its just amazing to me how much more attention i get from people these days as opposed to when i weighed 50lbs more than i do now.

______________________________________________________________________________________________

anyone else have a story about how your fitness journey and weight loss have changed the way people treat you?

people that would have never given you the time or day to get to know them now want to get to know you, or maybe you've changed so much that girls or guys are intimidated to approach you or maybe you make them nervous because they like you lol.

im just curious to know your story!

Your friend (ex-friend?) is a dirty liar.

haha omg i was thinking the exact same thing! Handsome..definitely nothing bad looking there!

anyways, i never heard that i was "ugly" persay and if i was told that i dont remember probably because i laughed in their face. But about 5 months after i had my daughter i was ordering a pretzel from auntie annes...(didnt feel like dieting at the time) & i was talking to my friend telling her that i probably shouldnt eat this..& the lady behind the counter said "its okay...the baby will enjoy it!" i asked her what she said and she turned beat red and didnt repeat it. i was crushed! so needless to say thats when i started my dieting & working out.

mrsbeardtoyou

I KNOW I wasn't good looking growing up, but to have someone come up and tell me that I look BETTER now that I am 44 than when I was 20... WOW, I was SKINNY back then and now, I am in the process of getting "skinny" again. I am not sure, but I guess I am "blessed" with GETTING OLDER.. lol

NatalieBrooke88

Yeah, I went to school at Georgia Tech and I had some frat boys nickname me "Donkey Kong". Yeah, I will never be able to let go of how that made me feel.

Mom0fTwo

My ex decided to tell me every day how fat and unattractive i was and when i finally had enough of him and left his response cut me really deep.. which is why i'm here..

He said "i thought dropping my standards and going for a nice girl rather then a pretty one would mean i won't get hurt"

That hurt.

Ya can I have his address so I can punch him for you???

girl_afraid82

I remember once a few years back, a couple of my close friends were teasing me about my weight (which at that point wasn't all that much... pretty sure I weighed under 140lbs!) and went a bit too far. It started off with me laughing along with them, but for some reason they didn't let up on the jokes. I could feel myself welling up a bit, so I told them it was going too far for my liking and that I was actually pretty sensitive about the subject, but they carried on. I waited until they finally left the room to cry about it, but they found out how upset I was due to my ex running after them and having a go at them. They did apologise but they seemed baffled as to why I was crying over it.

To this day I have no idea why they did that to me, and it's stuck with me for about 6 years now (as these things do). The most amusing thing though, is that one of them is now 3 stone heavier than me, when she used to be built like a twig.

giggitygoo

I'm so sorry your "friend" did that to you. That's awful. Truthfully though - you're quite far from ugly. Attractive indeed


I too, have been called ugly. So, so many times. Always by other women. I was picked on for being too skinny, too pale, my blonde hair was ugly, my nose, my teeth, my height. Apparently I'm just tore up from the floor up.

It's absolutely not true, I know that. But people like to tear you down when they're feeling insecure. It says more about them than you.

KarateGoddess

I've been told I wasn't good looking since we all had to watch that horrible video about the chances in our body. Purberty is a horrible thing. I'm still getting the "ugly girl" looks from people.

I was hanging out with one of my chick friends and her sister and realized I'M THE UGLY FRIEND! Same thing happened when I was a little younger and with my cousins. I was the ugly duckling of the group Guys say I'm "hot" just to see how far I would go. I just laugh and tell them "yeah I'm more like luke warm"

I'm sad now all over again

You've got to get away from those people, girl! They don't deserve to have you as a friend. You are beautiful - can't you see? We all can. .

thatgirl125

have you ever been told you weren't good looking? if so, did it bother u? or did you think they were an idiot..
a person who i used to hang out with just as friends - she told me that i wasnt even good looking.

it didnt really bother me, but i was shocked to hear her opinion so bluntly like that haha.
the weird thing is, now she wont leave me alone! she is blowing up my phone with txt and "oh lets hang out this weekend!"
she seems desperate now to "hang out" and i always tell her im busy - ill hang out with her as a group, but it would never be a date, i would NEVER date her because of her shallow personality and she kinda sluts it up....

its just amazing to me how much more attention i get from people these days as opposed to when i weighed 50lbs more than i do now.

______________________________________________________________________________________________

anyone else have a story about how your fitness journey and weight loss have changed the way people treat you?

people that would have never given you the time or day to get to know them now want to get to know you, or maybe you've changed so much that girls or guys are intimidated to approach you or maybe you make them nervous because they like you lol.

im just curious to know your story!

*edit* also - did this help jump start your fitness journey?

uhmmm YOU, UGLY? I do not see how she could say that at all.


I personally have never been called ugly or anything (at least not that i can remember) by people I went to school with or just out and about. But I did notice a huge difference after I went out months after having my son, I was not noticed by any guys like some of my friends were.
Of course growing up my brothers would call me ugly and say that my real family is the "frog-faced family" and that I fell off of the ugly tree and all of the ugly branches hit me in the face. LMAO, of course then it upset me, but now I just laugh. The worse part was when I was 11, shortly after my parents divorced I gained weight and my brothers would always comment on that too. They would moo at me or say "oinky oinky." I took my parents divorce very hard, went from seeing my dad all the time to just once maybe twice a year. And in the summer when we would go and visit him he always had delicious food, and after 2 months we would fly back to my moms home and my mom would be like what did you eat there rachel? You are huge. then the entire year she would have me "dieting" or should I say, influencing me to diet... But thats about all I can remember.

bejuled74

I've never been told I was ugly, but I did and sometimes still do get..."you have such a pretty face". So it's one of those underhanded compliments I guess. But I have ALWAYS been self concious of my body and being fat. It is something that has held me back my entire life. As I have gotten older, I'm not as concerned as what other people think about how I look, but I still want to know what it feels like to look amazing. I know the times that I have lost weight, I did get a lot more attention, but the weight has always come back. This time I'm determined to lose it all and keep it off.

GinNouveau

When I was in my 20's, my boyfriend of 2 years, said he had something important to ask me. I thought he was going to propose since his lip was quivering and hands a little shaky. Instead he asked, "Are you always going to be heavy, or will you lose the weight and keep it off for good?" He said it was important since he couldn't see himself married to a fat person. He said he could handle a lot of other problems, but didn't want to deal with a fat wife. Apparently, his therapist suggested he ask me.

I had no idea he thought I was fat. I felt very ugly and undesirable. He even went on to say when he walked behind me on the beach he couldn't help but think what a shame it was that my thighs were so unattractive, since he liked "me" so much.

I am grateful to him. If he hadn't revealed that, I may have married him and not known he felt that way. Turns out I ended up marrying someone who is a much better match.

I'd send that therapist a thank you note. That advice defintely saved you years of mental issues.

littlebeans

man, this is both fascinating--since so many people go through this!--and heart breaking.

I grew up the chubby kid in the family. I also inherited my Italian father's dark hair and prominent features/nose. My brother, the athletic and loud mouthed one, would rip into me constantly. Junior high was worse than childhood though because when you are a kid being chubby was called "baby fat" most of the time, which I could hide behind. Beginning in 6th grade everything started growing in weird spurts and out of sync with everything else-my hair, my nose, my legs, my arms, etc. Coupled with the fact that I was not "cool" or "in style" and still chubby, I was a target for bullying. I will always remember when I was 13 and this kid pointed at me to this friend "look, I think she's the ugliest girl in the grade" I always "brushed it off" but it stuck with me, despite the confident exterior I put on. Then when I started becoming myself, evening out in weight, and more confident in my looks/style in high school I had absolutely no self esteem still. The minute people started paying attention to me or finding me attractive I was absolutely unaware of how to behave, completely sure I was secretly ugly. Childhood bullying = long term self esteem issues, Ive come to realize. I'm in my mid twenties now, with a boyfriend who loves me/how I look its still weird sometimes how that voice of the bullied 13 yr old lives in my head, telling me I'm ugly, picking apart my flaws,etc. The most obvious way it affects me today is when I wear a new outfit, or some new shoes/high heels, I keep thinking other people may be looking at me because I'm "weird" "ugly" or "strange." so I shouldn't bother taking the time to look nice because I am just drawing attention. I swear, as a person who loves style/fashion and is mostly a confident/out spoken person, its been a battle just accepting I'm still not that awkward 13 year old.

but you know what? those people who bullied me back then were just as insecure. If I could do one thing, I would go back in time and tell them to shove it! :-)

raines_eric

Yeah, I've been told that plenty.

But, I never believed them... and my girlfriend is way hotter than them. :-)

81Katz

When I was in high school, I found out that someone I liked, liked someone else because they were "prettier and skinnier than I was". It comes and goes in the back of my mind to this day. Sometimes it pops up and makes me feel like crap and other times I can go a very long time and I don't think about it.

Funny how years later, words can still bother you or hurt.

Plus it did not help that a family memeber always had mean names to call me. Fat, ugly, cow, pig, stupid, etc. Some of those still haunt me from time to time too.

shreyaj

Yeah, I went to school at Georgia Tech and I had some frat boys nickname me "Donkey Kong". Yeah, I will never be able to let go of how that made me feel.

Wow that is so mean! My god people are such jerks, you are freaking stunning!! Those dude's will end up with some plastic wife that looks like she's 65 when she's actually 40.

BrunetteRunner87

After reading this I've realized that nobody has ever made a negative comment about how I look. A couple times my parents would say I am getting heavy, but that was true. Nobody's ever called me ugly. But apparently some people do get called ugly. So why am I convinced that people think I'm ugly if nobody's ever told me I was, and they obviously aren't afraid to?