Not accepting new friends. Need to... vent? Im not angry.

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  • becoming_a_new_me
    becoming_a_new_me Posts: 1,860 Member
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    LMAO!! I think we read the same blog and wanted to be friends with the same person and we both got disappointed ....
    Now I want to read the blog!!!
  • shannieboo
    shannieboo Posts: 144 Member
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    agreed! and I hate when your new friends say "if you dont post or comment to them for 3 days they will delete you" just because I dont say something all the time does not mean i dont support you. thats why on my profile it states I do not have rules for friends.
  • Massageu2
    Massageu2 Posts: 59
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    Feel free to add me! I need all the support I can get and will do what I can to be supportive of others. Anyone else that wants too can feel free to add me too. I may take a day or two to approve you, but take it as I was a little busy, not ignoring you in any way.

    Tina
  • phinners
    phinners Posts: 524 Member
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    I'm happy to have new friends - my only disclaimer is that I do not log on every day, I work in a hospital and I am utterly knackered when I get home and cannot be arsed to log on to the internet every day to prove my commitment and woop everyone on. and also I have had weight loss surgery. And not every one likes us cheaters or *add what erver stigma you like here*. Other than that I'm cool
  • MMarvelous
    MMarvelous Posts: 1,067 Member
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    I'm not friends with everyone I meet in real life. I put up boundaries to appear unapproachable in real life (ex: no eye contact with slutty chicks at the bar).

    Well duh... you can't make eye contact when you're staring at their boobs! :wink:
    More of an *kitten* man.

    But yeah, I'm guilty of having my share of conversations with breasts.

    LMAO
  • phinners
    phinners Posts: 524 Member
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    Better to have no friends than hundreds of the sort who post 'WTG', 'Awesome burn', 'Wow, good going', 'Great job' and all the other token meaningless repetitive comments when you "burned 11 calories doing 5 minutes of "Walking the goldfish"" ;o)
    Lmao!!! Yup!!
  • onedayillbamilf
    onedayillbamilf Posts: 662 Member
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    I don't accept very many friend requests because when I was on here before, I ended up friending a psycho and I ended up having to delete the account. This time around I am ONLY friends with the people I know aren't going to attempt to make my MFP life a living hell by talking friends into sending hate mail, and people who I've seen around who's comments and posts I like. That's it, that's all. Period. It's MY choice to decide who I want to be friends with. People don't have to like it.
    How many times I gotta say sorry for that lmao
    I've already told you, sorry means nothing. You must send gifts!
    last time I sent you gift you mailed it back saying "No more creepy blow up dolls" I was trying to respect your wishes but if I can send gifts again mauahahahahaha:devil:

    That's because I specifically told you, IN WRTITING (because that makes it official that my demands must be met) that the only acceptable gifts are edible, shiny, or battery operated! That was NONE of those things. :grumble:
    Ok next blow up doll I send have a removelible "toy" better?

    Hmmm....if you send the toy, minus the doll, I MIGHT think about forgiving you. But batteries MUST be included!
  • mjordanjordan
    mjordanjordan Posts: 1
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    Agreed. There are always going to be cliques. Especially on the internet. Keep your head up. Anyone who doesnt want to take the time to meet and help new people isnt ready to help themselves! Good Luck! & Feel free to add me.


    PS. Watch what you say on here... the evil clique trolls will eat this post right up (:

    "Anyone who doesnt want to take the time to meet and help new people isnt ready to help themselves!"

    Excuse me? Some people get a lot of friend requests and so they feel they have to limit who they accept. Some people may prefer to have only a few friends on MFP, so they feel closer to them. Whatever the reason, not wanting to accept a strangers "friend" invite has ABSOLUTELY NOTHING to do with a persons interest in their own health.

    I agree 100% I dont usually spend much time in any of the forums and am not looking to be someone else's support at this time. For me, MFP is an excellent tool and tracker to help me do what I am trying to do. I have a few 'pals' on here and they are friends in 'real life.' I am very private about my weight loss journey but that doesnt make me any less dedicated. It also doesnt make me a mean, selfish, terrible, pompous, (insert whatever negative adjective you would like) person.

    At some point, I may feel that I am in a position to be supportive to people that are looking for that, but I am not there yet. ANd it just isnt really my personality to have lots of virtual friends.
  • ishallnotwant
    ishallnotwant Posts: 1,210 Member
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    I'm not friends with everyone I meet in real life. I put up boundaries to appear unapproachable in real life (ex: no eye contact with slutty chicks at the bar).

    Well duh... you can't make eye contact when you're staring at their boobs! :wink:
    More of an *kitten* man.

    But yeah, I'm guilty of having my share of conversations with breasts.

    When they start talking back you know you've had too much to drink.
  • KarateGoddess
    KarateGoddess Posts: 93 Member
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    That is seriously annoying! I can't believe they wouldn't even want new subscribers. What snobs! Like they're SOOO special! HAHA You're not selfish - they are. MFP is a community. We're all in this together to help each other get through something that can be extremely difficult and people like that are only in it for the attention - all they want from you is your 'Oh you look so fabulous! I wish I looked like that. You're so amazing.' comments to pad their already over inflated egos.

    Screw them!!

    There are so many much more amazing and real people here that are inspiring and are willing to be your friend and will help and support you. This is a great way to find them.

    I'll be your friend. :).
  • firesoforion
    firesoforion Posts: 1,017 Member
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    Yeah, I feel like the more the merrier friends-wise, and don't really understand other thought processes on here or elsewhere. I haven't been particularly quick on friending people, and yet some have still unfriended me. Eh, it means that the people on and still on my friends list are the ones that I truly want there. I feel like there has been a sense of pride, recently, about having "exclusive" friends list (in general). There was so much criticism of people for having too many facebook friends (where it started), that people decided that they'd go the other way and make their friends list an exclusive club, which is way, way more pretentious than the "friend collecting." Who knows what's going on with other people, I try to ignore it and just move on (though refusing a friend request or unfriending are one of the few things that just bother me, period.).
  • LastMinuteMama
    LastMinuteMama Posts: 590 Member
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    I saw some profiles here where I wanted to ask for their friendship, but it MUST come with a message. Message about what? About how great looking they are, fit or what am I going to tell them before I even got the chance to see what they are here for? Just looking for support, like everyone else, no big deal. Isn't this why you befriend someone here?

    I have that, "send a message", because I'm curious about what we have in common or what made you wanna friend me...are you a runner, tough mudder, mom? I still have accepted requests regardless, I saw it on other profiles and thought it was a nice idea/ice breaker, if you will.
  • daffodilsoup
    daffodilsoup Posts: 1,972 Member
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    Not everyone subscribes to the "more the merrier" philosophy. There's no shortage of users on MFP - find other people to connect with.
  • shanolap
    shanolap Posts: 1,204 Member
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    This another "debate" that I don't understand. Different people have different goals and purposes for this site. Why must people bad-mouth anyone who does it differently? I am not referring to the OP, she was venting. But rather than tell her not to take it personally, so many people jumped in with their comments about "those" people. They won't succeed, they're snobs, they're cliquish, they act like this is high school, they're douches. For the love of crud, people, grow up!

    Agree 100%!
  • skinnybearlyndsay
    skinnybearlyndsay Posts: 798 Member
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    Yeah, we all need support in this endeavor, but why does it bother you so much? You could probably find other just-as-good-if-not-better MFP pals here. It's not the end of the world and it doesn't hurt to try.

    I prefer a small group of people (<100) that I am friends with on MFP. I do turn down friends requests if there is no message, no profile, no picture, our goals don't mesh, etc. I don't do it to feel more "self-important". I do it to build the best group for my personal support.

    And, in a way, aren't we all being self-important in this journey? After all, isn't it about ourselves?
  • KarateGoddess
    KarateGoddess Posts: 93 Member
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    I don't accept very many friend requests because when I was on here before, I ended up friending a psycho and I ended up having to delete the account. This time around I am ONLY friends with the people I know aren't going to attempt to make my MFP life a living hell by talking friends into sending hate mail, and people who I've seen around who's comments and posts I like. That's it, that's all. Period. It's MY choice to decide who I want to be friends with. People don't have to like it.
    How many times I gotta say sorry for that lmao
    I've already told you, sorry means nothing. You must send gifts!
    last time I sent you gift you mailed it back saying "No more creepy blow up dolls" I was trying to respect your wishes but if I can send gifts again mauahahahahaha:devil:

    That's because I specifically told you, IN WRTITING (because that makes it official that my demands must be met) that the only acceptable gifts are edible, shiny, or battery operated! That was NONE of those things. :grumble:
    Ok next blow up doll I send have a removelible "toy" better?

    LMAO
  • Emmajool
    Emmajool Posts: 12
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    I honestly don't think people are trying to be 'cliquish', I think people just want to be able to focus on and have time for the friends they have on MFP. This site is not just a casual site like facebook where people blog about everything and anything. For the most part, the people here are really trying and some really struggle with weight loss. It's nice to be able to actually keep up with your list of friends and be encouraging. I trim my friend list quite a bit, because I just feel like i can't keep up. If I see people who are not active, I have to cut them. I want to be a supportive friend, but I have a life outside of MFP, so I can't have super long lists of friends to chat with or i'll be on here too much.

    I agree. I go onto the boards from time to time, but my friend's list consist of people I know and hang out with. We encourage one another and work out together. I hope you can find support through the boards. Hang in there.
  • Dtho5159
    Dtho5159 Posts: 1,054 Member
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    I add everyone lol
  • becoming_a_new_me
    becoming_a_new_me Posts: 1,860 Member
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    I accept friend requests, but only if there is a note telling me why they want to be friends. I have this as a memo on my profile, but you'd be surprised at how many requests I get without a message attached.
  • honeysprinkles
    honeysprinkles Posts: 1,757 Member
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    I didn't realize that people were so overwhelmed, not to mention so important, that they feel the need to declare they are not accepting friends.

    Really... seriously??? This is a fitness website.. get over yourself.

    And, OF COURSE, I will be your friend. :)
    It was a lot easier keeping up with everyone and being supportive when I had a friends list of about 40 people. Now that I have more than 100 people on here, as awesome as all the support is, it would take me all day to keep up with everyone and comment like I used to so I get why people don't want to accept more friends. It's not personal at all.

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