girls ... do you mind if your men go to strip clubs?

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  • sfoxy219
    sfoxy219 Posts: 103
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    Here's my thing - I don't equate sex with love... and I don't think objectifying beauty is a bad thing. Sex and sexuality are so vilified in the US (especially), and everyone is raised to believe that bodies are dirty, sex is dirty, and if you like either, you're dirty. IMO, it's the most absolutely natural part of being human. Moreso than love, more than enjoying fine wine, or understanding sarcasm ... it's essential for our survival.

    And really, I'd much rather have a man that can appreciate a woman's body without feeling 'bad' about it than a man that pretends like he only sees me. That's a one-way ticket to resentmentville.

    Nicely said.
  • ampa916
    ampa916 Posts: 189 Member
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    I wouldn't mind. but my husband hates strip clubs. He says no point in going to watch someone strip when he can't touch or anything it's just a waste of money. So I just get to be his stripper :p
  • downinaggieland98
    downinaggieland98 Posts: 224 Member
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    I tend to think any guy that would spend his hard-earned money at a strip club is pretty sad...
  • mummy_gerdes
    mummy_gerdes Posts: 336 Member
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    as long as he is upfront about it i couldnt care less - i go with the guys sometimes. its when they styart lying about where they have been that you know it is a problem.

    also :love: the answer about him coming home for dinner!!
  • JanetLM73
    JanetLM73 Posts: 1,277 Member
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    It wouldn't bother me at all. my husband doesn't like them because the drinks are too expensive, he likes a good old fashion pub.
  • infamousmk
    infamousmk Posts: 6,033 Member
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    I'm surprised almost everyone is okay with strip clubs ... I would never be okay with my boyfriend going because I feel like it objectifies and hypersexualizes women. I feel like strip clubs say that women have one purpose and that's to be sexy. They ignore women's other wonderful characteristics, achievements, and personalities. Does anyone else feel this way?? Plus why would I be okay with him getting sexually aroused by anyone but me? I wouldn't want some girl giving my man a lap dance. .... P.S. I don't mean for this comment to be disrespectful to anyone's opinion, I just don't understand why girls are okay with it.

    I love lots of great characteristics, achievements, and a wicked personality, but my boss doesn't care about the ones that aren't relevant to my work. Why should I care what kind of degree a dancer has when it doesn't relate to her work? Some of us just don't put our self-worth in to our careers. I go to my job every day to make money, so that I can go home and do the things I enjoy. I don't care what anyone there thinks of me on a personal or spiritual level.

    And if you think you're the only person he's ever sexually aroused by, you're dead wrong anyway.
  • GlitterGoldJem
    GlitterGoldJem Posts: 73 Member
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    The strip clubs were I live leave a lot left to be desired when it comes to the girls on stage. Lets just say the rejects from People Of WalMart would be better than what the clubs have here. So if he wants to go for some sh*ts and giggles then go for it. Even if we had descent places I wouldn't care, there's nothing wrong with visuals ... makes for fun for us later. :)
  • Im_NotPerfect
    Im_NotPerfect Posts: 2,181 Member
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    Heck no! Our policy...lookey no touchey! The only touchey he better be doing is on me. Other than that...he's married. Not dead!
  • doorki
    doorki Posts: 2,611 Member
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    I'm surprised almost everyone is okay with strip clubs ... I would never be okay with my boyfriend going because I feel like it objectifies and hypersexualizes women. I feel like strip clubs say that women have one purpose and that's to be sexy. They ignore women's other wonderful characteristics, achievements, and personalities. Does anyone else feel this way?? Plus why would I be okay with him getting sexually aroused by anyone but me? I wouldn't want some girl giving my man a lap dance. .... P.S. I don't mean for this comment to be disrespectful to anyone's opinion, I just don't understand why girls are okay with it.

    your husband is getting sexually aroused without you all of the time. All men are. Hell, when you are younger it just takes a stiff breeze.
  • HelloSweetie4
    HelloSweetie4 Posts: 1,214 Member
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    My husband doesn't really like to go. Sometimes he will go with his buddies (maybe once or twice a year). I don't have a problem with it.
    Of course, he's the clingy type, so he doesn't like going anywhere without me. I've actually made him go to a strip club with his buddies once because I wanted some alone time. lol
  • Lib_B
    Lib_B Posts: 446 Member
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    And this is where women's lib got us ???

    WOW

    This ^^^^

    I get that some claim that the women have the power, but at the end of the day, they are still viewed as a piece of meat. That said, I don't care if my hubby goes. But, he seems to have lost interest since we had a daughter. He has come to realize that those girls are someone's baby and he wouldn't want men ogling his baby in that way. It's objectification - which, if you are unaware of the meaning - these girls are viewed as "objects." Not as people with real feelings, real problems, etc. Just as a naked piece of *kitten*. Personally, I find it kind of sad. To each their own. But I want my daughter (& my son for that matter) to view themselves as worthy enough to be more than an object.
  • fitnfancy80
    fitnfancy80 Posts: 251 Member
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    I don't mind but don't make it no habit.
  • modernartemis
    modernartemis Posts: 37 Member
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    For our bachelor/bachelorette parties my husband and I had an agreement: We wouldn't like the idea of another person waving their goods around our fiance's face, therefore we won't go ourselves. I absolutely HATE the idea of my man getting a lap dance, I would flip. Him watching a girl on a pole, well you see worse than that on t.v. every night.

    He didn't even want to go to a strip club, his friends did on his bachelor night. He wanted to get drunk and play poker, lol. I had an ex who once went to one in Philly, his friend bought him a lap dance, and one of the girls offered to "finish it" for $50. He was so disgusted he almost threw up, knowing a *kitten* was dancing on his lap. He never went to one again. (NOT saying all strippers do that- but this was supposed to be a NICE strip joint, so I am sure sometimes, once in a blue moon, it happens)
  • kayleesays
    kayleesays Posts: 564 Member
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    Here's my thing - I don't equate sex with love... and I don't think objectifying beauty is a bad thing. Sex and sexuality are so vilified in the US (especially), and everyone is raised to believe that bodies are dirty, sex is dirty, and if you like either, you're dirty. IMO, it's the most absolutely natural part of being human. Moreso than love, more than enjoying fine wine, or understanding sarcasm ... it's essential for our survival.

    And really, I'd much rather have a man that can appreciate a woman's body without feeling 'bad' about it than a man that pretends like he only sees me. That's a one-way ticket to resentmentville.

    Nicely said.

    I love this answer. I would love if a man were up front with me about this kind of thing. My boyfriend and I are both very open when it comes to confessing attraction to other people - but it's just that: attraction, not a desire to be with that person. When a man goes to a strip club, the last thing he's looking for is real intimacy with another woman. I equate it with 3D porn.
  • jsapninz
    jsapninz Posts: 909 Member
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    I would not be in a relationship with someone who though it was ok to go to a strip club.

    To me, sexuality is something wonderful and private between a couple, it isn't something you flaunt and share with total strangers. Yes, we have "needs," no, it doesn't mean you should fulfill them in every way possible. I am in a relationship because I am committed to my man, totally and completely, which includes sexually. If my man didn't feel the same way then obviously we wouldn't have a relationship.

    I find it odd that the women on here are so cavalier about them not caring/encouraging their men to go. I wonder if it has something to with a confusion about being confident and secure in your relationship...the defense is "it doesn't mean anything," but sex and everything related to it does mean ALOT because it is so important and awesome :blushing: :happy:.

    Let the roasting begin.:indifferent:
  • BeautifulRedButterfly
    BeautifulRedButterfly Posts: 316 Member
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    i wanna go to one.
    i wouldnt mind getting a lap dance from another girl (;
  • Huffdogg
    Huffdogg Posts: 1,934 Member
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    I don't care where he gets his appetite, as long as he comes home for dinner :wink:

    LOL I love this quote.
  • christina_theresa
    christina_theresa Posts: 290 Member
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    who needs a strip club when he can come home to this *swings on pole and then falls ungracefully on the floor* :laugh:
  • ChitownFoodie
    ChitownFoodie Posts: 1,562 Member
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    I wouldn't mind if he went, but it doesn't interest him. I've dated guys who worked at strip clubs, and they admit that after awhile they are completely desensitized to the whole idea. If he wanted to go, I would probably tell him to have fun. Eh!
  • Huffdogg
    Huffdogg Posts: 1,934 Member
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    This thread has been great for identifying people to Ignore. Thanks _snw_!!

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