girls ... do you mind if your men go to strip clubs?

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  • Nucky719
    Nucky719 Posts: 143
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    Me and my bf like to indulge in a strip club occasionally. Also, if he went with a group of friends every once in a while, well that's great, have fun! But if he was regularly frequenting a club by himself for no reason, spending lots of money, yes I would have a problem with that.
  • LilRedRooster
    LilRedRooster Posts: 1,421 Member
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    He doesn't go any longer, because he's grown out of it at this point, and the allure is faded.

    Besides, for him, it was something that he would do with a group of guys, just for a fun time and a different setting. Since he doesn't have a group of guys that he would do that with now, he doesn't go, because going alone is apparently not cool. But even if he did go out with the guys to see that sort of thing now and then, I wouldn't care. He's told me that it's just fun to see some different scenery now and then for kicks, and it's not anything that he needs or really puts any serious stock in.

    I get it, I wouldn't mind going to a Latin ballroom competition to just ogle the men with their pecs and tight pants. It's good, clean fun to admire.
  • breezymom81
    breezymom81 Posts: 499 Member
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    I lost my bf/fiance of 4 years to sex addiction. At first I thought it was okay he watched porn, I was curious bc I'd never watched it. But after we moved in together I saw the extent of his addiction. It got worse and worse and I couldn't satisfy him, he would literally have to have porn in front of him to... you know... and it got to the point that women weren't enough anymore, he started watching child porn and when I found out, I kicked him out and tried to get him professional help, which he didn't want. So now he bounces from girl to girl using them until he can't be satisfied anymore. He is really sick and I still care about him and I wish he would get help :cry:


    This is terriable but it is not porns fault or the sex industry, he is sick and needs professional help before watching child porn isnt enough and he goes after a child. Saying that porn caused this is like saying smith & wesson caused murder or Bud Light caused alcholoics. Sadly these problems have been around for hundrads of years and always will be, I hope he gets help fast! And good for you for getting away from him!
  • SinIsIn
    SinIsIn Posts: 1,865 Member
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    Last time he went to a strip club was because I needed a male escort to get in. =P
  • LizKurz
    LizKurz Posts: 340 Member
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    My husband doesn't do strip clubs, I don't know why. But, I certainly wouldn't care if he went, just like I dont care what porn he watches. And I don't care if he went and then wanted to come home and have sex. Lots of things can be a turn on, who you turn to is what matters.

    And I personally love going to strip clubs, so I would go with him too.
  • Snow__White
    Snow__White Posts: 1,650 Member
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    no i dont mind
  • DaughterOfTheMostHighKing
    DaughterOfTheMostHighKing Posts: 1,436 Member
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    the man I marry would not be in a place of temptation. I'm not prude, I understand that men have their needs, but my husband should come to me to have his needs met and same with/for me. If you lust in your heart, you have already committed adultery.
  • crazytreelady
    crazytreelady Posts: 752 Member
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    No, I have been to a strip club. You just have to know your limit..
    Drink and pocket wise haha.
  • breezymom81
    breezymom81 Posts: 499 Member
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    the man I marry would not be in a place of temptation. I'm not prude, I understand that men have their needs, but my husband should come to me to have his needs met and same with/for me. If you lust in your heart, you have already committed adultery.

    Ahh ****...I have commited lots of adultery by this standard and sma efor my husband :devil: oh-well we have made it 13 years together this way :wink:
  • Buttonpie
    Buttonpie Posts: 7
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    I dont care really, my husband isnt a huge fan of strip clubs, but if he was i couldnt possibly careless
  • breezymom81
    breezymom81 Posts: 499 Member
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    I used to go to strip clubs all the time. I'd allway's bring a female friend, or someone that I was dating. Rarely ever went with just guy's. I allway's enjoyed myself. Im in this relationship now where my girl is like, "You are never going to a strip club as long as were together". Life is too short to live like that... I don't feel like I should have to Not go because she doesn't like them.

    Exactly, she doesnt have to go, but you are a big boy so if you wanna go- then have it :wink: I hate being told I can and cant do! I work I am over 18 and even wear my big girl panties some days!!! :laugh:
  • Miss♥Ivi
    Miss♥Ivi Posts: 461
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    Don't mind at all! I actually think I have more fun than he does :laugh: The girls pay more attention to the girlfriends than to the boys!
  • MariaMariaM
    MariaMariaM Posts: 1,322 Member
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    No, I don't mind it at all as long as he doesn't touch. He can look all he wants but never touch!
  • littlepinkhearts
    littlepinkhearts Posts: 1,055 Member
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    I lost my bf/fiance of 4 years to sex addiction. At first I thought it was okay he watched porn, I was curious bc I'd never watched it. But after we moved in together I saw the extent of his addiction. It got worse and worse and I couldn't satisfy him, he would literally have to have porn in front of him to... you know... and it got to the point that women weren't enough anymore, he started watching child porn and when I found out, I kicked him out and tried to get him professional help, which he didn't want. So now he bounces from girl to girl using them until he can't be satisfied anymore. He is really sick and I still care about him and I wish he would get help :cry:

    I've lived with this before (it never escalated to child porn though) That would definatley be a deal breaker immediately. Although it's easy to blame yourself for his shortcomings....definately is his problem. And they usually don't see it as a problem which doesn't help either. Glad you got away from him!!
  • BAMFMeredith
    BAMFMeredith Posts: 2,829 Member
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    personally, i don't care if my husband goes. i even tried to get his friends to find him a stripper for a bachelor party before we got married. absolutely nothing wrong with checking out the scenery.

    though his boss might care. i don't think the bishop would appreciate one of his pastors frequently attending strip clubs. :)

    Hahahahaha that cracked me up. Yeah, might be a conflict of interest.


    Personally, I'm not a fan. Not because I'm jealous or anything, but because I just think they're kinda gross. I've been to strip clubs with friends several times (the first time I went was the only time I said "yeah! let's go!") for birthdays, bachelorettes, whatever, and I'm just not a big fan. The bf's not really a strip club guy either, but if a buddy of his has a bachelor party or something, I don't really care if he goes. I'm not cool with my man getting lap dances, though,unless it was something hilarious, like one from a midget or an amputee or something (no offense midgets or amputees). I don't really think he'd like it if some dude had was dancing all up on me with his d!ck in my face, so I'd rather he not have some chick all up on him either. Plus, I guess I don't really get the appeal. Why spend a ton of money to have some girl dance naked in front of you that you can't even bang, when he can just have me dance for him at home and he gets to hit it?

    That said, that's just my relationship. One of our really good couple friends goes to the strip club together all the time and they buy each other dances and stuff. Doesn't bother me, I'm not dating either of them :)
  • BAMFMeredith
    BAMFMeredith Posts: 2,829 Member
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    the man I marry would not be in a place of temptation. I'm not prude, I understand that men have their needs, but my husband should come to me to have his needs met and same with/for me. If you lust in your heart, you have already committed adultery.

    Ahh ****...I have commited lots of adultery by this standard and sma efor my husband :devil: oh-well we have made it 13 years together this way :wink:

    I have committed soooooo much adultery with Channing Tatum it's not even funny.

    Plus, everywhere you go could be considered a place of temptation. I mean, I've seen more hot chicks at the mall or the pool than I have in a strip club!
  • shannoninBC
    shannoninBC Posts: 371 Member
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    I don't think it would bother me unless it became an expensive habit.
  • Billywoo
    Billywoo Posts: 141 Member
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    There are only TWO types of guy's in this world. Guy's that LOOK. And guy's that LOOK AND TOUCH. The question that every woman has to ask herself is, What kind of man do YOU have, and what kind of man do you WANT to be with...
  • waffleflavoredtea
    waffleflavoredtea Posts: 235 Member
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    the man I marry would not be in a place of temptation. I'm not prude, I understand that men have their needs, but my husband should come to me to have his needs met and same with/for me. If you lust in your heart, you have already committed adultery.
    ^ this.
  • Sockimobi
    Sockimobi Posts: 541
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    I would say yes it bothers me. Because I know how easily addicted people can get to strip clubs, porn, etc. And it can ruin people. I would rather be single for the rest of my life, then have my boyfriend/husband go to a strip club or watch porn. Those images that the men will get in thier head after going to the strip club, it is hard to get those images out of thier heads. Porn too. I was a prostitute at one time in my life, trying to pay the bills after my divorce. And alot of my clients were married men. Thier wives had no idea. The other thing is, do you think the strippers like what they are doing? No, but they do it for the money, the drugs, etc. They don't really know any better. I have some stripper friends, they are not strippers anymore thank God. But all of them were sexually abused as children, as teenagers got into drugs and then became strippers. Drugs are very easy to get when your a stripper. Do you really want your men spending thier hard earned money on these strippers? Dont forget thier are vip sections where they can get extra's. And some men once they have been drinking awhile. They will forget about thier wife, and they will think, hey a handjob or blow job isnt cheating, because we aren't having intercourse. Have any of you researched the sex trafficking industry? They make millions on stealing girls and women and pimping them out. Alot of these women don't want to be prostitutes but are forced into it. Keep letting your husbands induldge in strip clubs, etc. I won't be surprised when he ends up cheating on you, or giving you an std. Strip clubs are not harmless fun. They are disgusting. Open your eyes. I dare you women to go to the strip clubs by yourself. Talk to the strippers, hear thier stories, and see all the married men with rings on thier fingers, sitting thier acting like horny teenage boys. There is an epidemic, and more and more people are becoming sex addicts, because of the easy affordable sex there is out there. Porn, prostitutes, strippers, Adult personals. Yall might be normal people that don't know about this stuff. But I have lived it, and seen the devestation it causes.

    Your broad generalizations are ignorant. I have had strippers for friends, I have known drug addicts, I'm totally aware of the sex trafficking industry, and yet I still somehow live with myself every day while enjoying strip clubs. Everybody's gotta get paid somehow, and if strippin' keeps the lights on, I think that's great.

    Her information isnt ignorant. Not all woman in that situation are there against their will or being abused or on drugs, but there are ALOT that are. You just never know which one is and isnt. How can you enjoy the "show" knowing that the sex indistry is made up of mostly women that are not there by choice. BUT I guess if you would be ok with your wife or daughter up there with men lusting over them (some innocent and some not so much) then enjoy. But its not a healthy lifestyle for anyone involved.

    I agree that she's not ignorant; I think she's brave to speak her mind like this when the majority here disagree. I'm a professional counselor and I work with many of the consequences of sex addiction, sex abuse, alcoholism and more. It is not harmless fun. Anything that promotes the idea of women as sex objects and sex as something divorced from love, intimacy and commitment directly contributes to violence against women and continuing exploitation. My husband feels the same so neither of us participate in things like this. There's also a big increase in sexual slavery all over the world, including in the USA, and it's built on making tons of money from people indulging their basest desires without regard for the consequences to those who do the work. I wonder if the women who indulge in or support all this ever really let themselves think deeper about all these things...and what their hearts would say if they did.

    For the reasons outlined in the last comment, I would not tolerate it. Not that it matters as my fella feels the same. I don't know why some women act as though there is something wrong with a guy who won't be involved in this kind of exploitation. At least don't kid yourself that there isn't a very ugly side to this industry.

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