Why do people ignore friend requests?

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sammyjowedeking
sammyjowedeking Posts: 116
in Motivation and Support
I see a lot of peoples profiles that say, " I won't accept friend request without a message!" or " Let me know what we have in common and I might add you."

Honestly? this is a support website! Do people really think they are too good to add people? Or think to many people want to be their friend? Whats wrong with that?

Im sorry but I just don't understand. If someone wants to be my friend and needs me for support or wants some inspiration, I wont deny them. Its not like you have personal information on your profile that people could track you with like Facebook.

Can someone explain this to me?
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Replies

  • TheFitHooker
    TheFitHooker Posts: 3,358 Member
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    I will add anyone who ask's but I remove if they don't log in for a month. I do that because I do get a lot of friend request and I don't mind it at all, I'll support anyone but if you sign up, find me, and then never log in again, I just don't like that lol.
  • jeffdoc
    jeffdoc Posts: 224 Member
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    I agree fully. I accept any friend requests and, in fact, encourage people to add me as a friend because I can use the motivation and I am happy to provide the same in return.

    Great post/topic. Glad you brought it up. :)

    Cheers!

    Jeff
  • LovingLisa2012
    LovingLisa2012 Posts: 802 Member
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    i have no clue .. i add anyone .. i actually prefer to not have a message included ..lol
  • allifantastical
    allifantastical Posts: 946 Member
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    I agree!
  • d2footballJRC
    d2footballJRC Posts: 2,684 Member
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    I see a lot of peoples profiles that say, " I won't accept friend request without a message!" or " Let me know what we have in common and I might add you."

    Honestly? this is a support website! Do people really think they are too good to add people? Or think to many people want to be their friend? Whats wrong with that?

    Im sorry but I just don't understand. If someone wants to be my friend and needs me for support or wants some inspiration, I wont deny them. Its not like you have personal information on your profile that people could track you with like Facebook.

    Can someone explain this to me?

    Because there are A. collectors, people who just friend request everyone. B. It's really hard to keep up with your news feed once you get over 100 friends. I'm at 160 now and I'm going to have to trim back again. So friend requests help you pick out people that you want to have with you on the journey. It shows a little bit of effort. I'm a bit rough in that I usually cut people once they stopped logging on for a week, unless they say they are on vacation or something. I want to give quality support and inspirations to my friends. It's more personable and less just basic.. GOOD JOBS...
  • jules0516
    jules0516 Posts: 158
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    Thank You, I have wondered the same thing...Even if the person has specifics likes and wants to be around like-minded people-Do they stop to realize they might be that one person that helps someone that is struggling big time but because the person who needs help may not outwardly "fit" in as a friend...well- Motivation and Support go out the window,doesn't it??
  • taso42
    taso42 Posts: 8,980 Member
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    When you hit around 200 or so, it will make sense.
  • darrcn5
    darrcn5 Posts: 495 Member
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    I personally add people message or no, but I think their reasoning is to make sure that their friends on here are someone they can relate to. I have other females, particurally mothers, as my friends because I can easily relate to them and support them. I wouldn't be able to relate as well to a college aged male. It helps to have some kind of common ground. Some also do it because they want to make sure the friends they have are actually going to interact with them and not ignore them. Like Facebook, some people on here like to collect friends; they add people and then never say a word to them. They are just a number.
    And I will admit, I do delete people who I am not meshing with for whatever reason or who ignore me and never provide support or encouragement. One gal had an issue with low carb eating, which is something I do. By no means do I expect all of my friends to do things my way, but please don't be nasty to me because I am not doing things "your way."
  • Pebble321
    Pebble321 Posts: 6,554 Member
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    I can't speak for anyone else - but for me, I haven't accepted any new requests lately because I feel as though I don't have enough time or energy to respond to the friends that I have right now and I don't want to add new people only to ignore them.
  • d2footballJRC
    d2footballJRC Posts: 2,684 Member
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    When you hit around 200 or so, it will make sense.

    exactly, I got to 280 once and it was madness. The news feed was impossible to follow. 80-130 or so seems to be the sweet spot for me.
  • underthecherrytree
    underthecherrytree Posts: 532 Member
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    I add everyone as well but ask that they leave a message so I know where they found me. For example, if someone found me on the 100+ lbs to lose forum I would love to know as I can really relate to that person:)
  • autumnk921
    autumnk921 Posts: 1,376 Member
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    I like to know something about people from the start just because it's nice to know if we have something in common - SAHM, 30+ lbs to lose, Live in my area, My age, height, weight, etc so I can relate to them....I will add pretty much anyone even without a message - even though I do have it on my profile to add a message but I know sometimes people add you b/c of a post you may have written in a thread...But I have had people who request to be my friend & that is the last time that I hear from them ever...I give support to ALL of my friends but would like the same in return...If they don't say one word to me for a month - especially when they have been logging daily - I will delete them b/c I need motivation as well...This isn't like FB like you said & I don't want 300+ friends on here with 100 of them that I have never even heard a word from...But that is me....
  • ishtar13
    ishtar13 Posts: 528 Member
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    I'm an introvert.

    I only make some things public.

    If I see you post in a forum, I'll cheer you on.

    I don't want people I don't know, like and respect (which means getting to know you first) as "friends".

    Actually, the only person I've "friended" so far is someone that I know I have a lot in common with from another forum.

    My real life best friend is on here, and I haven't "friended" her here yet.

    There are some things I want to be private.

    I initially came here for the food/exercise tracking tools, not the "support".
  • Contrarian
    Contrarian Posts: 8,138 Member
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    I'm shy and private. I have a small, but excellent group of friends here, and that makes me happy. Do you want me to be unhappy or something?
  • onedayillbeamilf
    onedayillbeamilf Posts: 966 Member
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    I'm selective with who I accept because I've tried that whole "accept everyone" thing and it did not end well.
  • Jorra
    Jorra Posts: 3,338 Member
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    Honestly, why should I have to be everyone's friend? I don't want every last person on this site to be my "friend." I keep friends that I interact with often and have common interests with.

    If I want to interact with other people, I will use the forums.
  • d2footballJRC
    d2footballJRC Posts: 2,684 Member
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    I'm shy and private. I have a small, but excellent group of friends here, and that makes me happy. Do you want me to be unhappy or something?

    Depends...

    Please fill out this questionnaire:

    A. Political Affiliation
    B. Blood Type
    C. Am I Nerd?
    D. Cats or Dogs
    E. How many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie roll tootsie pop?
    F. Do you eat your exercise calories?
    G. Will lifting make women bulky?

    After you fill out that very informative survey I can properly answer your question.

    ;-)

    Just kidding, I mean you no harm :-D
  • d2footballJRC
    d2footballJRC Posts: 2,684 Member
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    I learned be selective who you give your texting number too. There are some crazies on here.
  • simplydelish2
    simplydelish2 Posts: 726 Member
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    In trying to support my friends, I can get overwhelmed with the time it takes. I keep my friends list pretty small and don't accept all the invites.

    Just another perspective.
  • Contrarian
    Contrarian Posts: 8,138 Member
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    I'm shy and private. I have a small, but excellent group of friends here, and that makes me happy. Do you want me to be unhappy or something?

    Depends...

    Please fill out this questionnaire:

    A. Political Affiliation
    B. Blood Type
    C. Am I Nerd?
    D. Cats or Dogs
    E. How many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie roll tootsie pop?
    F. Do you eat your exercise calories?
    G. Will lifting make women bulky?

    After you fill out that very informative survey I can properly answer your question.

    ;-)

    A Liberal
    B Whatever the most common type is. B+ maybe?
    C Kind of
    D Both. Either. Giraffes.
    E 3
    F Usually
    G No

    I eagerly await your response.

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