Why do people ignore friend requests?

sammyjowedeking · May 2012

I see a lot of peoples profiles that say, " I won't accept friend request without a message!" or " Let me know what we have in common and I might add you."

Honestly? this is a support website! Do people really think they are too good to add people? Or think to many people want to be their friend? Whats wrong with that?

Im sorry but I just don't understand. If someone wants to be my friend and needs me for support or wants some inspiration, I wont deny them. Its not like you have personal information on your profile that people could track you with like Facebook.

Can someone explain this to me?

TheFitHooker · May 2012

I will add anyone who ask's but I remove if they don't log in for a month. I do that because I do get a lot of friend request and I don't mind it at all, I'll support anyone but if you sign up, find me, and then never log in again, I just don't like that lol.

jeffdoc · May 2012

I agree fully. I accept any friend requests and, in fact, encourage people to add me as a friend because I can use the motivation and I am happy to provide the same in return.

Great post/topic. Glad you brought it up.

Cheers!

Jeff

LovingLisa2012 · May 2012

i have no clue .. i add anyone .. i actually prefer to not have a message included ..lol

allifantastical · May 2012

I agree!

d2footballJRC · May 2012

I see a lot of peoples profiles that say, " I won't accept friend request without a message!" or " Let me know what we have in common and I might add you."

Honestly? this is a support website! Do people really think they are too good to add people? Or think to many people want to be their friend? Whats wrong with that?

Im sorry but I just don't understand. If someone wants to be my friend and needs me for support or wants some inspiration, I wont deny them. Its not like you have personal information on your profile that people could track you with like Facebook.

Can someone explain this to me?

Because there are A. collectors, people who just friend request everyone. B. It's really hard to keep up with your news feed once you get over 100 friends. I'm at 160 now and I'm going to have to trim back again. So friend requests help you pick out people that you want to have with you on the journey. It shows a little bit of effort. I'm a bit rough in that I usually cut people once they stopped logging on for a week, unless they say they are on vacation or something. I want to give quality support and inspirations to my friends. It's more personable and less just basic.. GOOD JOBS...

jules0516 · May 2012

Thank You, I have wondered the same thing...Even if the person has specifics likes and wants to be around like-minded people-Do they stop to realize they might be that one person that helps someone that is struggling big time but because the person who needs help may not outwardly "fit" in as a friend...well- Motivation and Support go out the window,doesn't it??

taso42 · May 2012

When you hit around 200 or so, it will make sense.

darrcn5 · May 2012

I personally add people message or no, but I think their reasoning is to make sure that their friends on here are someone they can relate to. I have other females, particurally mothers, as my friends because I can easily relate to them and support them. I wouldn't be able to relate as well to a college aged male. It helps to have some kind of common ground. Some also do it because they want to make sure the friends they have are actually going to interact with them and not ignore them. Like Facebook, some people on here like to collect friends; they add people and then never say a word to them. They are just a number.
And I will admit, I do delete people who I am not meshing with for whatever reason or who ignore me and never provide support or encouragement. One gal had an issue with low carb eating, which is something I do. By no means do I expect all of my friends to do things my way, but please don't be nasty to me because I am not doing things "your way."

Pebble321 · May 2012

I can't speak for anyone else - but for me, I haven't accepted any new requests lately because I feel as though I don't have enough time or energy to respond to the friends that I have right now and I don't want to add new people only to ignore them.

d2footballJRC · May 2012

When you hit around 200 or so, it will make sense.

exactly, I got to 280 once and it was madness. The news feed was impossible to follow. 80-130 or so seems to be the sweet spot for me.

underthecherrytree · May 2012

I add everyone as well but ask that they leave a message so I know where they found me. For example, if someone found me on the 100+ lbs to lose forum I would love to know as I can really relate to that person:)

autumnk921 · May 2012

I like to know something about people from the start just because it's nice to know if we have something in common - SAHM, 30+ lbs to lose, Live in my area, My age, height, weight, etc so I can relate to them....I will add pretty much anyone even without a message - even though I do have it on my profile to add a message but I know sometimes people add you b/c of a post you may have written in a thread...But I have had people who request to be my friend & that is the last time that I hear from them ever...I give support to ALL of my friends but would like the same in return...If they don't say one word to me for a month - especially when they have been logging daily - I will delete them b/c I need motivation as well...This isn't like FB like you said & I don't want 300+ friends on here with 100 of them that I have never even heard a word from...But that is me....

ishtar13 · May 2012

I'm an introvert.

I only make some things public.

If I see you post in a forum, I'll cheer you on.

I don't want people I don't know, like and respect (which means getting to know you first) as "friends".

Actually, the only person I've "friended" so far is someone that I know I have a lot in common with from another forum.

My real life best friend is on here, and I haven't "friended" her here yet.

There are some things I want to be private.

I initially came here for the food/exercise tracking tools, not the "support".

Contrarian · May 2012

I'm shy and private. I have a small, but excellent group of friends here, and that makes me happy. Do you want me to be unhappy or something?

onedayillbeamilf · May 2012

I'm selective with who I accept because I've tried that whole "accept everyone" thing and it did not end well.

Jorra · May 2012

Honestly, why should I have to be everyone's friend? I don't want every last person on this site to be my "friend." I keep friends that I interact with often and have common interests with.

If I want to interact with other people, I will use the forums.

d2footballJRC · May 2012

I'm shy and private. I have a small, but excellent group of friends here, and that makes me happy. Do you want me to be unhappy or something?

Depends...

Please fill out this questionnaire:

A. Political Affiliation
B. Blood Type
C. Am I Nerd?
D. Cats or Dogs
E. How many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie roll tootsie pop?
F. Do you eat your exercise calories?
G. Will lifting make women bulky?

After you fill out that very informative survey I can properly answer your question.

;-)

Just kidding, I mean you no harm :-D

d2footballJRC · May 2012

I learned be selective who you give your texting number too. There are some crazies on here.

simplydelish2 · May 2012

In trying to support my friends, I can get overwhelmed with the time it takes. I keep my friends list pretty small and don't accept all the invites.

Just another perspective.

Contrarian · May 2012

I'm shy and private. I have a small, but excellent group of friends here, and that makes me happy. Do you want me to be unhappy or something?

Depends...

Please fill out this questionnaire:

A. Political Affiliation
B. Blood Type
C. Am I Nerd?
D. Cats or Dogs
E. How many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie roll tootsie pop?
F. Do you eat your exercise calories?
G. Will lifting make women bulky?

After you fill out that very informative survey I can properly answer your question.

;-)

A Liberal
B Whatever the most common type is. B+ maybe?
C Kind of
D Both. Either. Giraffes.
E 3
F Usually
G No

I eagerly await your response.

TinkrBelz · May 2012

Because I have over 250 friends...all moms. I do not mind adding moms, but at least tell me something. if i added everyone that sent a FR (without a message) I would have over 400 friends...I do not mind helping people, but I can barely keep up with the friends that I have. It is nothing personal.

aproc · May 2012

I ignore or remove when somebody is consistently eating too few calories and encouraging bad habits for others. I don't ignore others but I like to have friends with the same type of goals for motivation and support. But I'm always happy to give support to anybody.

RachelsReboot · May 2012

Hmmm, I can only speak for myself and why I ask for a message first, for me it's because I don't feel like with a large list that I am able to give each person the kind of support I would like to. I like to know everyone's first names rather than calling them "socks" or "stinkfeet72" when my list get's over a certain number that becomes difficult to do. I also like to know that the people on my list are not going to bash my eating plan. I don't care what anyone elses plan is, I believe if it's working for you then it's the right one but not everyone feels that way and I have had people on my friends list who disagreed with my plan and were unable to give support because of it.

Silver_Star · May 2012

I started off accepting requests without a message...but often found that the person would add me and then ...didnt make any kind of contact or comment for the rest of the time.. which i thought was weird....why add someone and then pretend like they dont exist.

I like it when people just say hello or just an introductory message when they add me... its just friendlier...after all..its a "friend list":flowerforyou: its fine if people dont want to get to know me..but its always nice to make new friends and actually build a relationship while losing weight.

TanyaCurtis · May 2012

Cause I have to many, I wanna be able to keep up with everyone, and I feel overwhelmed already! If their purposefully starving themselves to lose weight, if they don't have an actual picture of themselves up, and just things like that, I'd have to ignore, or delete

d2footballJRC · May 2012

I'm shy and private. I have a small, but excellent group of friends here, and that makes me happy. Do you want me to be unhappy or something?

Depends...

Please fill out this questionnaire:

A. Political Affiliation
B. Blood Type
C. Am I Nerd?
D. Cats or Dogs
E. How many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie roll tootsie pop?
F. Do you eat your exercise calories?
G. Will lifting make women bulky?

After you fill out that very informative survey I can properly answer your question.

;-)

A Liberal
B Whatever the most common type is. B+ maybe?
C Kind of
D Both. Either. Giraffes.
E 3
F Usually
G No

I eagerly await your response.

After carefully grading and then using the bell curve.. I have came to this conclusion.... You're AWESOME. Only one you got docked for was C. ;-)

Trechechus · May 2012

I add everyone who requests, but I do want to keep my friends list tight and full of active people who are willing to give and take motivation, suggestions, and help whether or not it's pretty. I do like to get notes with a request, though, just so I have some kind of idea who I am adding, especially if I get a request from someone who hasn't filled out their profile.

Drawberry · May 2012

Most people don't walk up to strangers on the street, point at them and say "WE'RE FRIENDS NOW!" and I find it reasonable that someone would prefer some sort of polite contact before hand.