When guys yell out the car and honk the horn at you..

rachellem86

I've found a simple direct compliment goes a long way. I'm absolutely into giving honest compliments all the time...in a non-creepy sort of way, if they're deserved. I've told countless women, "hey, I'm not a freak, but I call like I see it - and I couldn't help notice how amazing you look...I respect the hard-work you had to put in to get there..." I then go the opposite direction relatively quickly to not make them feel awkward or threatened. Multiple times I've had the woman tap me on the shoulder and thank me, very sincerely for noticing. Sure beats a yell or whistle. Try it guys...just don't be the creepy guy.

^^ this. Simple compliments go a long way! Use your words, boys!

Ctripp86

Having been yelled at by women numerous times when running, I find the appropriate response is to twist my nipples while licking my lips. Everyone wins!

haha perfect!

rml_16

I've found a simple direct compliment goes a long way. I'm absolutely into giving honest compliments all the time...in a non-creepy sort of way, if they're deserved. I've told countless women, "hey, I'm not a freak, but I call like I see it - and I couldn't help notice how amazing you look...I respect the hard-work you had to put in to get there..." I then go the opposite direction relatively quickly to not make them feel awkward or threatened. Multiple times I've had the woman tap me on the shoulder and thank me, very sincerely for noticing. Sure beats a yell or whistle. Try it guys...just don't be the creepy guy.

That's a lot to say as you're driving past her down the road. You must talk fast. ;-)

I've never been yelled at or whistled at in a situation where someone would have the time to say all of that to me.

oregon_mama

I'd be flatterd as well. No guy has ever approached me really. I have ***** written all over my face i guess. BLAH. But to your question YA I'd GIGGLE and BE FLATTERED. Proably think they arent even being serious.

Nanou1975

I would be searching for the girl they would be making the comment too. I would never think they are talking about me.:laugh: :laugh:

I have to say that my exercices are always with my dog, and I have my music on during that time too. They would need to get pretty close for me to hear the comment and my dog would go into total protector mode so he would be barking and growling to let them know to back off. (he's the reason I even go out to exercise...it feels safe)

Jellyphant

If this was done to you, how would you feel?

I've heard countless people say it's trashy to enjoy that kind of thing, and not that it's ever happened to ME personally, but hell, I'd be flattered.

I like it, I like doing it. A few years back I remember seeing a car with a bumper sticker that read "Honk to see my boobs" I honked like 4 times I drove up next to the car and all I can see is this SUPER FAT guy with extremely large titts just laughing and smiling at me....

I was embarrassed...

Hahaaaa, BURNNN!!

rml_16

OK, Papaver

va_va_voom

It's an attack on your worth as a human being, and if they yell out of the car at you, all you are is a piece of meat that they feel they can judge.

It's degrading, deplorable, and honestly, whenever I get cat-called at, I flip them the bird. They quickly change their tune to "YOU B*TCH/S*UT/W*ORE!" or whatever their feeble little minds can come up with.

It's also called "rape culture." But if I start in on this, I'll be here for hours.

I'm guessing it's more about you flipping them the bird that gets you called those names and less about them feeling the need to overpower you by raping you. If you don't like it, ignore it. But, doing something insulting is going to always bring you MORE negative attention. That's not rape culture, that's just reality.

no, it IS rape culture.

it's the belief that yelling objectifying things at a strange woman is acceptable. it's a power play. and it IS degrading.

lucky i'm fugly, because i'd be terrified if someone yelled at me when i'm walking.

I'm not talking about the cat-calling part of it. Yes, it's degrading - which is why I ignore it. Why draw MORE attention to myself? Ignoring it isn't condoning it, but doing something equally offensive in return isn't going to make it stop, either.

If a woman really wants to put an end to the behavior, then walking confidently and making eye contact without smiling is the best way to show a man that she is aware and ready to defend herself, if necessary.

I've been whistled and yelled at repeatedly in my life. Those men are not the men who have made me feel like I needed to be ready to protect myself. It was a supervisor at an old work place, an ex boyfriend's friend, a teacher... all people relatively well known to me. It is statistically proven that most rapists are not going to be a random man on the street and, if it is, I doubt he's cat-calling first.

va_va_voom

I've found a simple direct compliment goes a long way. I'm absolutely into giving honest compliments all the time...in a non-creepy sort of way, if they're deserved. I've told countless women, "hey, I'm not a freak, but I call like I see it - and I couldn't help notice how amazing you look...I respect the hard-work you had to put in to get there..." I then go the opposite direction relatively quickly to not make them feel awkward or threatened. Multiple times I've had the woman tap me on the shoulder and thank me, very sincerely for noticing. Sure beats a yell or whistle. Try it guys...just don't be the creepy guy.

That's a lot to say as you're driving past her down the road. You must talk fast. ;-)

I've never been yelled at or whistled at in a situation where someone would have the time to say all of that to me.

lol

angryguy77

I'd feel disturbed and tell them I don't swing that way

PapaverSomniferum

It's an attack on your worth as a human being, and if they yell out of the car at you, all you are is a piece of meat that they feel they can judge.

It's degrading, deplorable, and honestly, whenever I get cat-called at, I flip them the bird. They quickly change their tune to "YOU B*TCH/S*UT/W*ORE!" or whatever their feeble little minds can come up with.

It's also called "rape culture." But if I start in on this, I'll be here for hours.

I'm guessing it's more about you flipping them the bird that gets you called those names and less about them feeling the need to overpower you by raping you. If you don't like it, ignore it. But, doing something insulting is going to always bring you MORE negative attention. That's not rape culture, that's just reality.

no, it IS rape culture.

it's the belief that yelling objectifying things at a strange woman is acceptable. it's a power play. and it IS degrading.

lucky i'm fugly, because i'd be terrified if someone yelled at me when i'm walking.

I'm not talking about the cat-calling part of it. Yes, it's degrading - which is why I ignore it. Why draw MORE attention to myself? Ignoring it isn't condoning it, but doing something equally offensive in return isn't going to make it stop, either.

If a woman really wants to put an end to the behavior, then walking confidently and making eye contact without smiling is the best way to show a man that she is aware and ready to defend herself, if necessary.

I've been whistled and yelled at repeatedly in my life. Those men are not the men who have made me feel like I needed to be ready to protect myself. It was a supervisor at an old work place, an ex boyfriend's friend, a teacher... all people relatively well known to me. It is statistically proven that most rapists are not going to be a random man on the street and, if it is, I doubt he's cat-calling first.

the whistlers may not be the rapists, correct,

but it's the culture that condones it. talk to the public prosecuter in your area and find out how many rapists actually get charged when their victims have the guts to press those charges. go to your local women's shelter and find out how many of those women have been blamed by other people for their victimhood. sit quietly at a bar and listen to men talk about the women around you.

it is a rape culture that thinks whistling and yelling crude obsceities at women is "cute" or "funny"; that judge a person not on their personhood, but on their secondary sexual characteristics.

women are nothing more than objects in this day and age, only marginally less so than 50 or 100 years ago. look up the statistics of women's rate of pay vs men. look up their placement rates out of graduate programs. look at comments about women politicians.

and women condone this through silence sometimes, and through acceptance more often.

women like me, ms. "I LOVE IT WHEN PEOPLE OBJECTIFY ME!!!", are are losing our self worth at a young age because we are not society's standard of beauty (or worse, if we ARE), pressured to dye our hair, lighten or darken our skin, lose weight in unhealthy ways, get implants, perfect our make-up techniques, and why? because our college educations are worth less than a man's? because when walking down the street we may or may not get insulting things yelled at us? and because our peers think getting yelled at is "flattering" even "acceptable"?

and women walk outside, HOPING to get yelled at? like it's all in good fun? like it isn't a symptom of the sad sad world we're living in?

i need an asprin.

va_va_voom

the whistlers may not be the rapists, correct,

but it's the culture that condones it. talk to the public prosecuter in your area and find out how many rapists actually get charged when their victims have the guts to press those charges. go to your local women's shelter and find out how many of those women have been blamed by other people for their victimhood. sit quietly at a bar and listen to men talk about the women around you.

it is a rape culture that thinks whistling and yelling crude obsceities at women is "cute" or "funny"; that judge a person not on their personhood, but on their secondary sexual characteristics.

women are nothing more than objects in this day and age, only marginally less so than 50 or 100 years ago. look up the statistics of women's rate of pay vs men. look up their placement rates out of graduate programs. look at comments about women politicians.

and women condone this through silence sometimes, and through acceptance more often.

women like me, ms. "I LOVE IT WHEN PEOPLE OBJECTIFY ME!!!", are are losing our self worth at a young age because we are not society's standard of beauty (or worse, if we ARE), pressured to dye our hair, lighten or darken our skin, lose weight in unhealthy ways, get implants, perfect our make-up techniques, and why? because our college educations are worth less than a man's? because when walking down the street we may or may not get insulting things yelled at us? and because our peers think getting yelled at is "flattering" even "acceptable"?

and women walk outside, HOPING to get yelled at? like it's all in good fun? like it isn't a symptom of the sad sad world we're living in?

i need an asprin.

I just find this post so extremely ironic in this sub-section of the forums, TBH. I've seen more women flaunt their bodies, talk in sexually suggestive manners, and call modest women (like myself) prudes for not engaging in the same behavior. So, the fact that you let off this rant on me has set my irony meter off the charts. Gah.

If you don't agree with it, then why are you here perpetuating it? I suppose it's under the guise of "sexual liberation"?

shoegal517

I won't even ride in my convertible with the top down by myself because I don't want people looking at me...but I'm super shy, so yeah.....it freaks me out. I don't think it's bad to feel flattered though, it doesn't mean you think it's ok to be a *kitten* but I don't think there's anything wrong with liking that you were noticed.

PANZERIA

the whistlers may not be the rapists, correct,

but it's the culture that condones it. talk to the public prosecuter in your area and find out how many rapists actually get charged when their victims have the guts to press those charges. go to your local women's shelter and find out how many of those women have been blamed by other people for their victimhood. sit quietly at a bar and listen to men talk about the women around you.

it is a rape culture that thinks whistling and yelling crude obsceities at women is "cute" or "funny"; that judge a person not on their personhood, but on their secondary sexual characteristics.

women are nothing more than objects in this day and age, only marginally less so than 50 or 100 years ago. look up the statistics of women's rate of pay vs men. look up their placement rates out of graduate programs. look at comments about women politicians.

and women condone this through silence sometimes, and through acceptance more often.

women like me, ms. "I LOVE IT WHEN PEOPLE OBJECTIFY ME!!!", are are losing our self worth at a young age because we are not society's standard of beauty (or worse, if we ARE), pressured to dye our hair, lighten or darken our skin, lose weight in unhealthy ways, get implants, perfect our make-up techniques, and why? because our college educations are worth less than a man's? because when walking down the street we may or may not get insulting things yelled at us? and because our peers think getting yelled at is "flattering" even "acceptable"?

and women walk outside, HOPING to get yelled at? like it's all in good fun? like it isn't a symptom of the sad sad world we're living in?

i need an asprin.

Amen to that, sista-friend.

Also, to the lady who said that I essentially 'deserved' to be called those names, why is it so terrible that I give back exactly what they give to me? (by the way, the simple fact that you says I 'had' to have been doing something to 'deserve' it is ALSO tying in to rape culture. Just sayin'. Blame the victim.)

It's not a compliment. It's a judgement on my looks and my worth as a person within society...and quite frankly, if you're going to be a chauvanistic jerk (I'd much rather use stronger language, but there you go), then I'll use my right as an equal human being in this society to give them back the same treatment - treat me like an object whose only purpose is to fulfill your sexual standard of beauty, and I'll treat you like someone who pays woman walking down the street for sex. The end.

PANZERIA

I just find this post so extremely ironic in this sub-section of the forums, TBH. I've seen more women flaunt their bodies, talk in sexually suggestive manners, and call modest women (like myself) prudes for not engaging in the same behavior. So, the fact that you let off this rant on me has set my irony meter off the charts. Gah.

If you don't agree with it, then why are you here perpetuating it? I suppose it's under the guise of "sexual liberation"?

SO! What you're saying is that women who 'choose' to hit on guys, dress in a sexual fashion, and are, essentially, 'loose women', 'deserve' all that they get? I am, of course, summing this up in a very loose (see what I did there?) and generic way...but still.

*** EDIT***

Also, the women who call you a 'prude' should go jump off a bridge. Sexual liberation and equality is about choice - the choice to have sex, and the choice to not have sex.

va_va_voom

Amen to that, sista-friend.

Also, to the lady who said that I essentially 'deserved' to be called those names, why is it so terrible that I give back exactly what they give to me? (by the way, the simple fact that you says I 'had' to have been doing something to 'deserve' it is ALSO tying in to rape culture. Just sayin'. Blame the victim.)

Find in my post where I said that you deserved it and I will absolutely retract it. I said you were inviting more negative attention by flipping them off. I mean seriously - flipping them off is stooping to their level. Show a little class.

It's not a compliment. It's a judgement on my looks and my worth as a person within society...and quite frankly, if you're going to be a chauvanistic jerk (I'd much rather use stronger language, but there you go), then I'll use my right as an equal human being in this society to give them back the same treatment - treat me like an object whose only purpose is to fulfill your sexual standard of beauty, and I'll treat you like someone who pays woman walking down the street for sex. The end.

Definitely not a compliment. It doesn't bother me, but I don't enjoy it. If - IF - I laugh, it's usually b/c I think they're ridiculous for doing it in the first place.

Oh - and as I said above, stooping to their level is hardly the way to show them how to treat a lady like a lady.

va_va_voom

SO! What you're saying is that women who 'choose' to hit on guys, dress in a sexual fashion, and are, essentially, 'loose women', 'deserve' all that they get? I am, of course, summing this up in a very loose (see what I did there?) and generic way...but still.

*facepalm* Yes, I see what you did. You deliberately misrepresented what I said. Pat yourself on the back for that one.

I'm saying that I find it interesting that women who will engage in those types of behaviors and the attention they receive from the other members here are calling out women in this thread who enjoy the attention they receive from a man cat-calling out the car window or walking down the street.

What difference does it make how the attention is received - it's still all just a means of getting attention. They like getting cat-called at, other women like flashing their boobs on forums where men are probably using those pictures later on for personal recreation. I actually think the cat-calling is less disturbing from that standpoint.

PANZERIA

Amen to that, sista-friend.

Also, to the lady who said that I essentially 'deserved' to be called those names, why is it so terrible that I give back exactly what they give to me? (by the way, the simple fact that you says I 'had' to have been doing something to 'deserve' it is ALSO tying in to rape culture. Just sayin'. Blame the victim.)

Find in my post where I said that you deserved it and I will absolutely retract it. I said you were inviting more negative attention by flipping them off. I mean seriously - flipping them off is stooping to their level. Show a little class.

It's not a compliment. It's a judgement on my looks and my worth as a person within society...and quite frankly, if you're going to be a chauvanistic jerk (I'd much rather use stronger language, but there you go), then I'll use my right as an equal human being in this society to give them back the same treatment - treat me like an object whose only purpose is to fulfill your sexual standard of beauty, and I'll treat you like someone who pays woman walking down the street for sex. The end.

Definitely not a compliment. It doesn't bother me, but I don't enjoy it. If - IF - I laugh, it's usually b/c I think they're ridiculous for doing it in the first place.

Oh - and as I said above, stooping to their level is hardly the way to show them how to treat a lady like a lady.

Lol, have a little 'class'? What are we, in the 50's?

So, let's go with your scenario - If I DIDN'T react. You know what that does? It tells them that I was OKAY with it. That I ACCEPTED their 'judgement' on my physical appearance.

I was not okay with it, and I was taught that if you don't like people doing something to you that you just say no. Since it was in traffic, flipping the bird was the quickest way to assure them I was NOT okay with it.

Or I could just sit down, shut up, and stay in my kitchen where I belong so I won't have these problems. Oh my, the big wide world is so scary...all these powerful, powerful men who are judging me on how I look...I guess if I leave the house imperfect today, I won't get honked at, and that's the WORST!!!!!!! I should just stay home. Much safer that way.

OR. I could tell them off in a quick way that will get the message across so that MAYBE, just MAYBE in the future they think twice about it. Probably not, but at least they know that I wasn't okay with what they did.

va_va_voom

Lol, have a little 'class'? What are we, in the 50's?

So, let's go with your scenario - If I DIDN'T react. You know what that does? It tells them that I was OKAY with it. That I ACCEPTED their 'judgement' on my physical appearance.

I was not okay with it, and I was taught that if you don't like people doing something to you that you just say no. Since it was in traffic, flipping the bird was the quickest way to assure them I was NOT okay with it.

Or I could just sit down, shut up, and stay in my kitchen where I belong so I won't have these problems. Oh my, the big wide world is so scary...all these powerful, powerful men who are judging me on how I look...I guess if I leave the house imperfect today, I won't get honked at, and that's the WORST!!!!!!! I should just stay home. Much safer that way.

OR. I could tell them off in a quick way that will get the message across so that MAYBE, just MAYBE in the future they think twice about it. Probably not, but at least they know that I wasn't okay with what they did.

Hey - it's a free country. You deal with it how you want to and I will deal with it how I want to - definitely not losing sleep over this one. I am not angry at the world b/c I came out of the womb a female. :flowerforyou:

PANZERIA

SO! What you're saying is that women who 'choose' to hit on guys, dress in a sexual fashion, and are, essentially, 'loose women', 'deserve' all that they get? I am, of course, summing this up in a very loose (see what I did there?) and generic way...but still.

*facepalm* Yes, I see what you did. You deliberately misrepresented what I said. Pat yourself on the back for that one.

I'm saying that I find it interesting that women who will engage in those types of behaviors and the attention they receive from the other members here are calling out women in this thread who enjoy the attention they receive from a man cat-calling out the car window or walking down the street.

What difference does it make how the attention is received - it's still all just a means of getting attention. They like getting cat-called at, other women like flashing their boobs on forums where men are probably using those pictures later on for personal recreation. I actually think the cat-calling is less disturbing from that standpoint.

Lol, lady, think what you wish. Judge however you wish. If it makes you feel better about yourself to receive fly-by cat calls (or as you call it, male attention), go for it. I, for one, don't, and I shared that.

We are obviously never going to agree. Just please stop judging women who don't just 'sit back and take it.' That's all my point really is.