My first MFP rant..

senyosmom

Hi there! I say (and you have already done so) delete, delete, delete! *Most* people have good advice and kind words of support but some will not. Can't win 'em all so just delete the bad ones and keep working towards your goals.

Personally, my food diary is not open. I log EVERYTHING I eat and sometimes I make bad decisions or have moments of weakness and I look at my food diary and have to face it - I know when I screw up and do not need it pointed out to me. Chances are Im still kicking myself for it anyway

Good luck to you!

Krisgren

That sucks!! Some people are so dumb!! No offense but I don't really care what you eat for breakfast (unless of course you wanna share, I'm sooooo in for cheesecake for breaky!!!), I'm guessing because you are on here you are focusing on your health and I'm pretty sure you're an adult and can make your own decisions!!

Also, I ate a peanut chocolate slowpoke thing about 10 mins ago (7am) and it was gooooooood!!!!!

In with the good, out with the bad.....good for you!!!!

mfpcopine

So this post is kind of pointless, I realize, but like the title says, it's just a rant..

I'm pretty new on MFP and have been following the forums and somewhat participating in them, and understand that there are people whose opinions naturally differ from one another. Some topics, especially those that are controversial usually end up turning ugly and that's expected on a public internet forum. I understand that when you post something asking for opinions, you naturally get a variety of opinions. This I have no problem with...

What I've been having a problem with is some "friends" who've recently added me have PM'd me, trying to give me advice I didn't ask for and in a very condescending way.
First one was a message saying and I quote "What exactly are you doing on MFP? You only weigh 125, are you here for attention? Just curious."
Do I have to be dangerously overweight to want to get healthy? To want to look better? How is my profile begging for attention? Have I posted anything asking for attention? ARE YOU KIDDING ME?
Yes I deleted this person, problem solved but nevertheless it was unexpected and annoying.

Second one was about my food diary that is (or used to be until today) open to everyone.
This morning I entered in "raw cheesecake", my own recipe. Ingredients are almonds, pecans, agave, dates, coconuts, blueberries, coconut oil and cashews, about 350 cals, full of healthy fats, vitamins and fibers.
One of my friends saw that I ate "cheesecake" and had the nerve to message me and say again I quote "Well if you're going to have cheesecake for breakfast why do you choose to share your diary with people who are actually trying to be healthy?"
1. Did I ask for your opinion?
2. Do you even know what the ingredients were for what you thought was unhealthy? Much healthier than the white bread and breakfast sausage you had this morning. Just who exactly are you to judge me?
3. Even if I had a 1000 calorie slice of regular cheesecake, how is what I eat your business? I'm logging for myself, and my diary is open for the times that I might need help or advice.

This person is also deleted but I mean who does this? Is everyone on here so healthy that my 1 slice of cheesecake that isn't even a cheesecake bother someone?

I though we were here to help people get healthy not skinny. So I agree. But ignore the bomb butts and enjoy the new stuff you learn.

How are you in a position to know that she's aiming to be skinny? Her weight, without more, tells very little. You would need her height, her bone structure, her body fat percentage, her weight history for starters.

itsmedicinalbacon

Its YOUR diary!!! definitely delete unsupportive people!! thanks for recipe!!

SophiannaD

These people sound jealous. Hell I'm jealous,

Twidget12

Would love the recipe for this cheesecake!!! Mmmm cheesecake...for breakfast *drools*! So sorry for your awful experience here on MFP, you definitely got some winners on your friends list! Note the sarcasm! Hope you can look past the ignorant people and start enjoying your experience here! Best wishes!!

Erisad

...now I want cheesecake, lol. I'd love to have your recipe for that though. Healthy cheesecake? That seems to be heaven on earth right there. Haters gonna hate. :P

Silvercivic

Wow that is ridiculous... I've never had anything like that happen to me! My diary is open to the public and I've posted some pretty bad binges! Everyone has been incredibly supportive. I don't have that much weight to lose either- and besides, there are people on here who are trying to gain or maintain too... anyway, sorry you had a bad experience! The rest of us are pretty nice!

sisierra

First thing you need to do is purge your friends list of people who aren't going to support you.

Smart people should be able to look at the macros of your cheescake and see if it is a decent choice or not. I say well done, I love cheesecake (insert shameless plug for the MFP Cheesecake group here) :bigsmile:

Many people on here aren't yet capable of appreciating that people have different goals to themselves, or are at different stages. Thie trick is to find people that are. Feel free to add me if you like - I'm pretty awesome

PS. I'd LOVE that cheesecake recipe if you'd care to share.

Thanks.

I don't even have a lot of friends on here yet. I guess I just got all the bad ones :noway:

Here is the recipe:
Crust:
1/2 cup pecans
1/4 cup almonds
1/4 cup shredded coconut unsweetened
1 tablespoon cacao or carob powder
1 tsp vanilla extract
2 dates
1 tablespoon agave

Put everything except for agave in a food processor and blend until everything is mixed well.
Add agave, blend until it turns into a sticky paste.
Press the paste onto the bottom of a springform pan.

Filling:
2 cups blueberries. If frozen make sure it's at room tem.
1 cup cashews, ground
7 tablespoon melted coconut oil
1/4 cup agave
1 tablespoon lemon juice

Blend everything. Pour onto the crust. Chill or freeze until the filling is hard.

Just added you, replacing the bad eggs with the awesome ones :flowerforyou:

where's the cheese? :sad:

yourpalacf

Hopefully comments like those are a one-off. My friends here have been very supportive. And I hate cheesecake...but raw nut-based ones are sooo good. A co-worker of mine brought one in to the office a while back. I was skeptical, honestly, but it was delish. And healthy!

Mercenary1914

Meal 3 on May 27th ....NICE!

aimsteen

Thank you so much for posting the cheesecake recipe. I can't wait to try it. Add me if you'd like. I never look at or comment on my friends diaries.

ETA: I might peek at your diary (if you make it public again) if you keep offering such great recipes.

bsgkid

Here is the recipe:
Crust:
1/2 cup pecans
1/4 cup almonds
1/4 cup shredded coconut unsweetened
1 tablespoon cacao or carob powder
1 tsp vanilla extract
2 dates
1 tablespoon agave

Put everything except for agave in a food processor and blend until everything is mixed well.
Add agave, blend until it turns into a sticky paste.
Press the paste onto the bottom of a springform pan.

Filling:
2 cups blueberries. If frozen make sure it's at room tem.
1 cup cashews, ground
7 tablespoon melted coconut oil
1/4 cup agave
1 tablespoon lemon juice

Blend everything. Pour onto the crust. Chill or freeze until the filling is hard.

Just added you, replacing the bad eggs with the awesome ones :flowerforyou:

Thank you! Must try! :drinker:

jennt_22

I'm sorry your 'friends' aren't turning out as actual supportive friends....
I think you made the right move by deleting them. You don't want to surround yourself with negative people. Everyone has their own reasons for joining MFP and you are so right - you don't need to be overweight to want to become a healthier person. People utilize this site for all kinds of reasons. To message you asking if you want you attention is just silly. That person obviously has a lot to learn. I also agree with others on here that the other person who commented on your cheesecake breakfast was out of line and they obviously only saw the word cheesecake and then reacted. I know cheesecake usually gets a bad rep but there are healthy versions out there (like yours!) Thanks so much for sharing the recipe by the way. I wish you the best of luck on your journey and hope some quality friends come your way!

mrf330

First thing you need to do is purge your friends list of people who aren't going to support you.

Smart people should be able to look at the macros of your cheescake and see if it is a decent choice or not. I say well done, I love cheesecake (insert shameless plug for the MFP Cheesecake group here) :bigsmile:

Many people on here aren't yet capable of appreciating that people have different goals to themselves, or are at different stages. Thie trick is to find people that are. Feel free to add me if you like - I'm pretty awesome

PS. I'd LOVE that cheesecake recipe if you'd care to share.

Thanks.

I don't even have a lot of friends on here yet. I guess I just got all the bad ones :noway:

Here is the recipe:
Crust:
1/2 cup pecans
1/4 cup almonds
1/4 cup shredded coconut unsweetened
1 tablespoon cacao or carob powder
1 tsp vanilla extract
2 dates
1 tablespoon agave

Put everything except for agave in a food processor and blend until everything is mixed well.
Add agave, blend until it turns into a sticky paste.
Press the paste onto the bottom of a springform pan.

Filling:
2 cups blueberries. If frozen make sure it's at room tem.
1 cup cashews, ground
7 tablespoon melted coconut oil
1/4 cup agave
1 tablespoon lemon juice

Blend everything. Pour onto the crust. Chill or freeze until the filling is hard.

Just added you, replacing the bad eggs with the awesome ones :flowerforyou:

OMG! That sounds awesome! Thanks for sharing. And you're absolutely right to delete people who criticize or don't support you. I keep my diary open to friends, but that's because they are primarily 'real life' friends and they help me to figure out what helps (I'm trying to lose weight, but have a long history of undereating). Anyway, keep doing what works for you!

TinaHumphries

That's ridiculous - I wouldn't go up to someone in a restaurant and tell them what they are eating is wrong so why to people feel that they can tell you on here!

You've done exactly the right thing :drinker:

Will have to try out the cheesecake this weekend sounds lovely

kdeaux1959

There are real "winners" in any community. At least you have uncovered them and deleted them. As for why you are here... Even if you are maintaining, it is useful to log your food/exercise. Welcome to the community.

mtaylor33557

I fully expected to get at least one comment like that this weekend, since I was super busy and living on drive through. But, I didn't ... I must have a great group of friends!!

My diary is open to the public, and I do sometimes have "junk" food... but, I'm not interested in having anyone tell me what to do.. that doesn't go over well... ask my husband,

StaceyL76

You had me @ cheesecake and breakfast.

Indeed! I bet it was fabulous! I used to make raw blueberry pie, carrot cake, and date peacan pie.. DELISH! Raw desserts are the best - and most of the time have a high nutrition content. Go with your B@d@ss breakfast! WooT!

Juicyyy

Thanks for posting the recipe! I am sorry that people have been so rude! Thats terrible. Some people love to hate, and are envious of others who they see as "healthy". Anyone who wants has the right to be on here whether you are using this to get healthy (healthier), lose weight, or maintain a healthy lifestyle! This is suppose to be about encouragement, but unfortunantly there are people out there that don't even know what that word means, sad.... Keep up the great work!!

Erisad

Here is the recipe:
Crust:
1/2 cup pecans
1/4 cup almonds
1/4 cup shredded coconut unsweetened
1 tablespoon cacao or carob powder
1 tsp vanilla extract
2 dates
1 tablespoon agave

Put everything except for agave in a food processor and blend until everything is mixed well.
Add agave, blend until it turns into a sticky paste.
Press the paste onto the bottom of a springform pan.

Filling:
2 cups blueberries. If frozen make sure it's at room tem.
1 cup cashews, ground
7 tablespoon melted coconut oil
1/4 cup agave
1 tablespoon lemon juice

Blend everything. Pour onto the crust. Chill or freeze until the filling is hard.

Just added you, replacing the bad eggs with the awesome ones :flowerforyou:

Thank you! Must try! :drinker:

Indeed. Recipe saved. I may try this sometime, even though I'm not a huge fan of coconut.

MadeInHeaven83

You can be on this site no matter HOW much you weigh! This site is for EVERYONE and it's about getting healthy and maintaining a healthy lifestyle, not just losing weight. You're right not to let anyone tell you otherwise!

Epicmum54

Bump

McGruber03

People love to give their opinions, wanted and unwanted. I keep my friends list small...about 3 people from work who are trying to be healthy together, and then my mom and my sister. Just don't add people or keep dropping the know it alls. Being healthy is not attention seeking, good for you for dropping them. I keep my diary closed too. Sorry you came in contact with some wackadoos!:happy:

zombiefarmboy

That sounds really crappy. I hate haters!

cmurray234

People can be so damned rude. UGH.

DUMP 'EM!

mfpcopine

I used to get comments about supposedly being anorexic on another site. Nothing could be further from the case.

Unfortunately, some overweight people have completely lost grasp of what normal weight ranges are. I read an article saying that fact alone may be one cause of obesity. Other people insist on championing weight loss theories that have been seriously challenged or debunked. On occasion, I see advice given here that is almost certainly going to result in weight gain, not loss. They don't understand that formulae depend on certain assumptions and not everyone meets them. If you aren't similar to the members of the designated group or an outlier, the "science" won't be valid for you. You have to exercise independent judgment.

As I said in another comment, no one can judge the appropriateness of someone else's weight goals or fitness program unless they know, AT MINIMUM:

Height
Sex
Age
Frame Size
Body Fat Percentage
Weight History
Health History
Goal (E.g., whether they want to be a body builder, or merely develop more strength and look good).

There are people here who are very knowledgeable (more knowledgeable than I; I read articles and summaries; they read the actual studies). They are supportive. Tune the others out.

Sublog

mmm cheesecake... I'd eat cheese cake for breakfast...

Will you marry me?

wattleneurotic

There's always some bad apples I'm sorry you experienced such negativity here.

And thank you very much for the recipe, it sounds wonderful. I will definitely be trying it!

stuiterbal

I am so gonna make this cheesecake! Sounds delicious. Can someone tell me what 'dates' are, in this recipe I mean?

Edit: found it! Thanks (English is not my first language...)