Is this jealousy or intuition?

SmexAppeal

Thanks for proving my point that men are stupid

Us men are stupid? Look at the girl who's gettin' played!

http://www.buuurn.com/

Let's dispense with the generalizations and think rationally here for a second. You are hearing a lot of information you probably don't want to hear [but likely suspect]. You started out with a vague scenario, only to provide more details when you attempted to rationalize your stance. The crowd still votes, "nay."

If he liked it, he would've put a ring on it.
-wtk

After only 3 months?!?! That's a little extreme to be talking marriage and rings after 3 months of dating!!!

HeatherHoskins

With you guys breaking up and getting together it sounds as if you are not meant to be. He is either using you in his rotation or just seeing what he can get away with. There is no reason he should be going to dinner with his ex, without you. It is one thing if they are still friends but if you are with him then you come to. If you are just dating and not with him then he is playing the field. His answer to your question shows his lack of respect to you. He should be trying to calm your mind, not make it go crazy. But apparently he can get away with that stuff from you. Speak your mind no matter how it sounds to him. If you don't like it tell him, if he doesn't like that then he can go away...............When I was younger I had an ex who was with someone new. He convinced her that we were just really great friends and we were... those kind with benifits.....she never knew. It happens so watch out.

Hellbent_Heidi

Why is it that as soon as people start dating they gain Hooks! What's wrong with someone maintaining a healthy sexual relationship with others when not actually being "in wedlock". Haven't you ever heard the old proverb?

Biblically speaking, there is a lot wrong with premarital sex, but I wont get into that here. Most women replying on here have enough respect for themselves and their bodies that they wont allow men to use them and lose them.

Yea but it also says if kids curse at their parents, the kids should be put to death.

I don't have kids, but this seems fair to me :laugh:

Seriously though..why are there always these women who consider sex as 'women letting men USE them"??? There's nothing wrong with having a healthy (safe) relationship with someone you aren't married to F.F.S.....its 2012!! I'm not suggesting we all randomly sleep around with everyone who walks by, but let's not pretend that women want to marry and live happily ever after with every guy we sleep with!

felice03

Maybe you could just talk him into another threesome. You, him & the stripper. That way, no one is left out.

that is how Angie and I met...maybe you will make a new friend!

Yea, you never know. Maybe even a new part-time job.

it is all about networking...

ilovemyboysx3

If it's lying in the yard and looks like poop and smells like poop ~ then it's probably poop. Walk away, girl. Just walk away.

Vincentsz

Why is it that as soon as people start dating they gain Hooks! What's wrong with someone maintaining a healthy sexual relationship with others when not actually being "in wedlock". Haven't you ever heard the old proverb?

Biblically speaking, there is a lot wrong with premarital sex, but I wont get into that here. Most women replying on here have enough respect for themselves and their bodies that they wont allow men to use them and lose them.

Yea but it also says if kids curse at their parents, the kids should be put to death.

I don't have kids, but this seems fair to me :laugh:

Seriously though..why are there always these women who consider sex as 'women letting men USE them"??? There's nothing wrong with having a healthy (safe) relationship with someone you aren't married to F.F.S.....its 2012!! I'm not suggesting we all randomly sleep around with everyone who walks by, but let's not pretend that women want to marry and live happily ever after with every guy we sleep with!

Finally Someone with sanity!!!

felice03

[/quote]


also - sex is a 2 way thing - it isn't men using women. The fun goes both ways...
[/quote]


unless it is a three way thing....

LilMissSunshine_

Maybe you could just talk him into another threesome. You, him & the stripper. That way, no one is left out.

that is how Angie and I met...maybe you will make a new friend!

Yea, you never know. Maybe even a new part-time job.

it is all about networking...

&& the tips.

Josette89

First off, if you guys are dating on and off and not an exclusive couple it really shouldn't matter what he does in his free time. If he was with this stripper girl before, I'm sure he is thinking of the possibility of getting with her again. He's not going to his place.... does that mean if they were at her place they wouldn't do it? I doubt that. You should just relax and whatever happens with him happens. You go do your thing and stop worrying about this one guy that you have been dating on and off.

tishad58

Not a chance. This sounds like intuition and I would be done. But- that's just me. There is still some kind of attachment there if he is taking her out to dinner for her birthday. Seriously, do you do this with people you are done with? Um, no.

LilMissSunshine_

also - sex is a 2 way thing - it isn't men using women. The fun goes both ways...
[/quote]


unless it is a three way thing....
[/quote]


I think they just all need to bang and get it over with.

UsedToBeHusky

Honey, he is not taking your relationship seriously, so why should you? He is going to do what he wants to do and he doesn't care how you feel about it. Dump this guy if you are looking for something serious. Or keep him but see other people yourself. Either way, you are looking for commitment where there isn't any!

oh_em_gee

Thanks for proving my point that men are stupid

Us men are stupid? Look at the girl who's gettin' played!

http://www.buuurn.com/

Let's dispense with the generalizations and think rationally here for a second. You are hearing a lot of information you probably don't want to hear [but likely suspect]. You started out with a vague scenario, only to provide more details when you attempted to rationalize your stance. The crowd still votes, "nay."

If he liked it, he would've put a ring on it.
-wtk

After only 3 months?!?! That's a little extreme to be talking marriage and rings after 3 months of dating!!!

Agreed, but it's not soon to be talking about some kind of commitment. With my current boyfriend, who I plan to marry, exclusivity and commitment came up before 6 weeks. He's clearly not ready commit to you and your son as a package deal.

MissMom3

WOW. Let him go ASAP. Is this really how you want to start a relationship? Sounds like my ex...who I was with for 5 years and 2 babies later I've realized he is the biggest piece of **** I have or will ever meet. GET OUT NOW!!! I now have a man that has opened every car door for me the past 15 months and he thinks about how I will feel before he says or does something. He's not a rich man, LOL. But having someone who adores you and loves you for who you are is so much better than being rich! The guy for you is out there somewhere and you will know when you meet him. DON"T SETTLE FOR LESS THAN YOU DESERVE!!!!!

zCarsAndCaloriesz

Honestly I would have left after he said that sentence. Sounds like something's up.

Desterknee

Ah. I have been bitten by the jealousy before. This would make me feel insanely insecure. Insanely. I wouldn't take it as a red flag though because he was upfront and honest and I value honesty above all things. I think the "no b/c shes not coming to my house" was a joke. I make jokes like that. They're crass, dry, and in poor taste but they are jokes and that's what it sounded like to me.

I can't call if its jealousy or intuition. What I will say is that you should be grateful that he was honest, and return the favor by being honest about your feelings. Just talk about it.

saxmaniac

3 months of casual on and off dating doesn't scream 'committed relationship' to me. I think he's given you as much honesty as he should be expected to with your relationship being where it is.

This. You're not monogamous until you actually have the talk, and both agree to be monogamous. Has this happened yet? Or you just hoping?

I would say any man who can pull threesomes and date strippers knows *exactly* what he's doing.

Dreamerryu27

I really thought my reply through. I tried to look at it from every avenue I could. Your looking for a commitment, and my intuition tells me he doesn't. If your okay with not being his priority and number 1 girl then roll with it just know he will never be with just you. If you were my little sister I'd tell you to move on and save your loving and time for someone willing to give you the same level of love and respect in return.

LelaYang

Trust me, if he was truly "into" you...he wouldn't be hanging out with his ex still. No matter how close they are. End of story.

spade117

I think they just all need to bang and get it over with.

Bang bang.

ShifuYaku

Why is he seeing girls? You are dating. End of story.

❤B☩❤

If sleeping around bothers you, I'd find a companion who isn't going to sleep around.
-wtk

He hasn't been sleeping around. It just weirds me out that he is taking his ex out for her birthday.

During your "off" time, do you know that he is NOT sleeping with her? I will say, tho, that the fact that he told you means that he wants to be open and honest with you.... I would definitely ask him, "Well, if you COULD go to your house, would sex be involved?" There's your answer.

Take time to do things for yourself, and don't give him so much relevance in YOUR happiness. Good luck!

Josette89

Big hugs. I love you MFP forums. Even on vacation you always make my day better. No shortage of stupid here.

My magic 8-ball says: All signs point to popcorn.

Thanks for proving my point that men are stupid

Us men are stupid? Look at the girl who's gettin' played!

hahahahahahhahahahhahahhahahahhahaha.... Boom.

HauteP1nk

Idk if it is jealousy or intuition, but I know it is stupidity if you continue to put yourself through this.

It is time to find someone else. You deserve better.

LilMissSunshine_

Why is he seeing girls? You are dating. End of story.

Wow, really. This isn't 1864.

Jacwhite22

I think they just all need to bang and get it over with.

Bang bang.

great song by Dispatch....Ever heard it?

Vincentsz

Why is he seeing girls? You are dating. End of story.

Wow, really. This isn't 1864.

AGREE!!!

TexanThom

Invite yourself along. If he says no, worry.

xSCiNTILLATEx79

A friend of mine just went through the same thing, his ex was a stripper too. low and behold he was playing her the whole time. even though he said he wasn't. If he's still attached to his EX stripper girlfriend he probably hasnt let go yet. an EX is an EX for a reason if your still all buddy buddy someones not over it. Just seems like if you broke up with someone you should move on. Although you guys are just "dating" he hasnt given you any commitment so really at this point its not so much your business. This friend went through alot of heart ache with a similar situation. Not worth it.

dfborders

Didn't read all of the comments on here but I think you are correct in saying that the two of you need to talk over - even if over the phone prior to Friday. First, is this something that he set up prior to the two of you getting back together? If so, it still sucks and I would be horribly jealous and insecure but not really sure if you can do anything about it. Second, the biggest red flag to me is that it appears he cheated on this girl because she cheated on him. That is my biggest concern - you hurt him and now, is this his way of hurting you back (passive agressive). Not sure if any of that helps but those are my thoughts. With the relationship being only 3 months old and not being together all of that time and both of you dating others while you were separated it doesn't seem like there should be this much stress (this should be the honey moon period).

My now husband had a girlfriend of 3 months that he broke up with two months before he met me. He met her online so they didn't have a long time friendship or anything like that. They continually talked after they broke up upsetting me and her now husband. I don't know what happened on her end but I finally told my Husband (after about three months) that if he wanted to talk to her on the phone that was fine but if they ever decided to meet up in public, even for coffee, we would have a problem. He was upset about my jealousy and I wasn't sure if it would end the relationship but I figured I had better put all my cards on the table from the beginning leaving it up to him whether he wanted to pursue a friendship with her or a relationship with me. As I explained to him I don't think he would like it if I was constantly in communication with my ex and talking about our personal life with my ex all the time. He told me he wouldn't care but the phone calls slowed down and they never met.

{Now that I have posted this let the bashing begin:bigsmile:}