Why do people not allow the "under 1200" friend requests
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I don't know about WELL above 1200. Mine is 1290, but like I said earlier...I do often eat above that.
But out of curiosity I plugged in my goal weight of 120 and my BMR is 1170. So then it will be ok for me to eat 1200 by your standards? Then I can be friend worthy.
Like I said earlier, eating 1200 because a woman is very petite and looking to lose some vanity weight, yes, that can be one way to lose weight without sacrificing too much lean muscle mass. That, and people who are obese and have lots of weight to lose and under doctor's care eat that way for a short period of time.
But eating at BMR for the rest of a person's life is not the way to go either. BMR is what is needed to run organs and brain function if in a coma. TDEE on top of BMR is what is needed to not gain or lose weight. You need to eat at your TDEE when you get to goal weight. Just saying.0 -
Yes, very arbitrary, and I wasn't having issues on it either, at first. And neither was my sister, at first. It only add people who realize that the 1200 cal number is not a health choice.I hike...and I'm currently doing 30 Day Shred. I do exercise, just not crazy. And I often eat in the 1400-1500 calorie range.
I'm good.
I'm just advocating that 1200 is a very arbitrary number and not everyone who is eating it is having issues.0 -
And your goal weight should be a healthy one you can support at your activity level. I don't think it's a good idea to be stick thin if you're not willing to eat a healthy number. I'm teetering on underweight and made decision that I wanted to keep that but I didn't want to keep it sitting at a desk all day (office job), because it wasn't healthy. If you can maintain that while eating a healthy amount of nutrient rich foods that is near the minimum calorie suggestion for an average women, then go you!I don't know about WELL above 1200. Mine is 1290, but like I said earlier...I do often eat above that.
But out of curiosity I plugged in my goal weight of 120 and my BMR is 1170. So then it will be ok for me to eat 1200 by your standards? Then I can be friend worthy.
Like I said earlier, eating 1200 because a woman is very petite and looking to lose some vanity weight, yes, that can be one way to lose weight without sacrificing too much lean muscle mass. That, and people who are obese and have lots of weight to lose and under doctor's care eat that way for a short period of time.
But eating at BMR for the rest of a person's life is not the way to go either. BMR is what is needed to run organs and brain function if in a coma. TDEE on top of BMR is what is needed to not gain or lose weight. You need to eat at your TDEE when you get to goal weight. Just saying.0 -
Aww thanks you're sweet. See this is the reason why it's sometimes worth saying something on these threads despite the backlash. Feel free to add me and I can nag you with documentation haha. Every now and then I read into the pcos stuff for my friends sake. I've read way to much google scholar documents on it for someone who doesn't have it trying to talk my friend out of being upset haha. Just keep in mind that not everyone is right, even studies have their scope. It's quite a depressing situation sometimes, and it doesn't have to be
It's very very common to stall on low calories and go up when you begin eating. You deplete your glycogen stores (a form of energy) and your body gets very excited when you give it enough to make liquid energy again...and that weighs weight. Most people I know who hit plateaus break it by hitting maintenance for about 6 weeks and doing a cut. They will whine and moan and be sad that they're gaining (water) weight and then a few weeks after the 6 weeks are up they shut up because they lost that and moreThank you for those links, I will be looking at those later and will see if there is anything that might help x
What I must point out, I was always a bit heavy but not fat until I lost both of my parents in a short space of time (2 years and 3 days). I emotionally ate and really really ballooned. It is only the last week that I have been eating about 900 a day out of desperation, I tried upping cals from 1200 and it didn't shift my plateau at all. I just literally lost a pound then gained 4 the next week then lost them all and then put on a pound etc.
I'm a big girl weight wise and it has got me down but getting the weight off (I also lost 5lb on the first week of dieting prior to joining here - i know it was water weight and that big loss most of us get in our first week) slowly was fine as long as i was losing even half a pound a week. It didn't bother me that I was losing slowly because I was still getting there slowly but surely. But eating 1200-1300 a day and not losing anything for 2 months was so depressing and disheartening.
I would never, ever say to anyone "Just cut your cals by half it worked for me" or anything like that but I am just wondering if this is the calories I need to consume to lose. Everyone is different. Its not like I am 110lb or anything, i'm still big.
I never comment on someone completing their diary and being under their cals unless their diary is viewable and I always view before commenting.
Oh and as for the comment about "everyone who eats less than 1200 is all about drama" what crap! I am just a normal woman who is 38 years old that wants to lose weight so that I don't die of heart disease in 20 years time. I don't moan on my wall on here. I have a friend on here (who I am going to unfriend) who constantly agonises about how she wants to go out for a meal but can't and she always has her 1200 minimum a day. Yet I have another friend (the one on a liquid 600 cals a day diet) who said last "My friend asked if I wanted to go out for a drink but at the moment I am sticking to this so did my fitness DVD instead
". She is on low cal and never moans or whinges at all!
You can't really tell if you're consistently losing weight week to week it's more of a month to month thing since our bodys can fluctuate with water. And sometimes the water is needed and is a good thing and helps us repair muscles and feed organs the energy they need to be healthy.
If you decide to go that route keep in mind that since you have pcos your tdee is going to be lower then estimated so you probably shouldn't eat up that much. Especially since you've been eating little. Your weight should level out before that time is out if you're guessing your TDEE right, it'll go up quick, but it well level out. But if you're anything like my friend it will still be above BMR. There's many who have been in the same boat as you and it's worked for them. There's a reason all those articles are out there on pcos saying stay away from low cal diets Unfortunately a lot of people don't know much about it and there doesn't seem to be a large amount of studies done on different diets for PCOS. I know I've seen several people mention they have metabolism problems including thyroid or PCOS and had success with eating more, I'm just not sure how active they are on the forums. You may want to join the eat more to weigh less group and ask if anyone is in a similar situation. One thing I do know though is exercise is mentioned as important on mostly all of the pcos sites. Just don't overdo it and make sure you're doing something to work on your strength.
You are a darling and just full of amazing advice. I also think you are right.
I am going to stick to this for this weekend and then from Monday I will go back up. Going to have a good look at your links and research a bit today and tomorrow so that I can eat the right foods to help and to get my cals back up.
Thank you, you have provided some really amazing ideas and advice without judging me or making snidey comments. Thank you again xx 0 -
To add to my last bullet - no, I do not follow them around to verify what they do. But I have a real hard time seeing how someone can eat 0.32 tbsp of peanut butter on a piece of bread for breakfast, and at the end of the day, they have hit 1200 ON THE BUTTON. Also, I see "So and so burned 1056 calories in 60 minutes doing Circuit Training General". BS alert. Just eat more and be honest!
LOL... this cracked me up... and it is oh so true. Although, I guess if your average heart rate for 60 minutes is around 170, you'd certainly burn a ton of calories. (not to say that it applies to any friends on my list
(this thread has gotten so off topic)0 -
i have deleted friends when they consistently eat under 1000 every day. As a former anorexic, getting attention of any kind only fuels it. I want no part of that. Anorexics, i feel, need intervention of the mental health kind. Not that obese people don't, but i can tell you having been on both sides of the scale, being obese and gaining healthy habits is alot easier than being anorexic and and forcing yourself to eat again.0
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I'm so tired of the 1200 calorie bashing. I'm BARELY 5'0, which really means 4'11 3/4. I don't need as many calories as a woman who is 5'6.
I eat regular meals...I often eat more than 1200 but I definitely have my days where I'm in the 1100-1200 calorie range. Again, I don't NEED as many calories as a lot of people.
I'm barely 5'2 with a bmr of only 1280 and I eat1550-1750 to lose. If you read back through the thread you will see there are many short ladies eating plenty of calories and still losing.
Being short doesn't have to mean eating ultra low calories.
I agree with you here too. I'm 5'2 and I eat 1300 calories, well, net 1300. I don't understand why people would think height has anything to do with it lol0 -
I don't have anything to add that CoderGal hasn't said already, I'm just bumping to keep up.0
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To each their own on what to put up as restrictions to friendship or support. I find it hard not to see it kind of rude though. Some just ask that you send a message why you want to be their friends which makes sense. Was it something I said? My picture? Goals? What? I equate it to how you make friends face to face. Sometimes you just need to hear one thing out of the person's mouth to know it's not going to work. If you had a sign on your forehead saying f$*k off to a segment of the population I guess you would accomplish the same thing.0
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Because everyone can choose on their own who to allow and not allow to be their "friends".
I didn't read all the pages (but I read a lot of them) and this has been the best reply I've seen. I'm not going to be friends with everyone IRL, and I certainly wouldn't be offended if there are people here who don't want to be my friend.
How you select your friends, is none of my business, nor is it any of yours how I select mine.0 -
I had the gastric sleeve 8 months ago. The calorie count for somone in the losing stage is anywhere between 700-1200. You might be missing out on learning about a new person if you decline based on the 1200 calorie count. Unless you dont want to associate with someone who has had WLS. I eat anywhere from 800-1000 based on my exercise a day. I am glad my friends didnt feel that way or i might not have that many friends, cause a lot of my friends havent had WLS.0
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Hmmm... While I agree that, for many sufferers, it may fuel their condition, it is not true of all sufferers. It depends on many factors such as why they developed the condition in the first place. I was in treatment with girls who flaunted their thinness in your face and spoke endlessly about their behaviours, how little they ate, etc. Then there were other girls, myself included, who hid under layers of baggy clothing and were embarrassed by their behaviours. That's one of the reasons why I've locked my diary, firstly because (as I stated earlier) I would NEVER want to give other sufferers ideas, but mainly because I'm deeply ashamed by the foods I eat and the quantities. My anorexia was about never feeling good enough and shame. I just wanted to disappear out of sight and HATE attention of any kind.As a former anorexic, getting attention of any kind only fuels it. I want no part of that.0 -
There are a lot of "pro ana" people which is terrible. But the people with legitimate eating disorders, the ones that don't promote their disorders (I wouldn't call it a lifestyle for it's not something you can choose to have happen to you) may be eating under 1200 too if they are not getting help. Probably people just don't want to see the Pro-Ana in their newsfeed. I know coming from me, somebody who is in doctor-supervised recovery, seeing pro-ana/under 1200 a day in my newsfeed is too triggering.0
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No one should eat less than 1200 calories per day. Educate yourself on nutrition. The Tufts University Guide to Total Nutrition is very good.0
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* Edited to add that I don't think 1200 calorie eaters are ALL of the above. They probably have one of the bullets tho. And before you start hating because you are a 1200 calorie eater, read again and see if you adopt at least one of the bullets. If you do, your argument TO ME is invalid.
Nope, none of those. And .32 tablespoons is just about 1 tsp. I log that amount (.33) and have hit 1200 on the button, though I'm also sometimes under or over, no big. If I can make 1 tsp meet my needs for 30 calories instead of 90, I will. I do plan my calories in advance, so that's why it's easy to make 1200. I'm just short and not overweight and not terribly active. So I need less than someone who is short and active or short and overweight.0 -
I dont agree with people who say this, if eating under 1200 calories works for people then let them eat that and if they have eating disorders they may need help not people who dont want to get to know them! I dont think other people should be so concerned with what people eat unless they are eating a really low amount0
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I dont agree with people who say this, if eating under 1200 calories works for people then let them eat that and if they have eating disorders they may need help not people who dont want to get to know them! I dont think other people should be so concerned with what people eat unless they are eating a really low amount
Agreed! Which is why I have that 1200 note in my profile :laugh:0 -
Are we talking netting, or just plain eating? I mean, I'm losing weight slowly, and eating about 1500cals, but netting 900.
I wouldn't dream of telling people to eat more or less, nor would I choose not to friend someone for it.0 -
I mean just eating. I often net below 1200. It doesn't mean I "really ate 900." I really, really, really ate 1200. Your body needs a deficit to lose weight. My body doesn't wait until the end of the day and divide up the calories I took in for my organs and my exercise.
Also, if someone on my friend's list has a good reason to be eating below 1200, I don't say anything about it to them (unless I forgot.) If their doctor says eat 900 for your PCOS, who am I to argue? But most people don't need to eat 900 calories.0 -
If you are obese, you cannot go into starvation mode (under 1200=starvation mode) its complete nonsense.
Jesse Short
ISSA Certified Personal Trainer0 -
I don't really get it either. Maybe those who don't accept the requests are jealous of people with extremely low calorie diets. . . which is stupid because the human body adapts very quickly to super low calorie diets halting weight loss and slowing metabolism. But to each his own!0
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People who eat LESS than 1200 are trying to kill themselves!!! Its simple! I don't accept ppl with ED for that reason!!0
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Thanks for letting us know this irrelevant-off-topic information JessieIf you are obese, you cannot go into starvation mode (under 1200=starvation mode) its complete nonsense.
Jesse Short
ISSA Certified Personal Trainer
CoderGal
2 diplomas in this and that
several certifications in this and that
several certificates in this and that
most of a degree
went to a gym with certified personal trainers
dated several dumb certified personal trainers who have proved to know jack squat about most things including health
p.s. Not saying you don't...just that it's irrelevant. Certificates do not make you intelligent.0 -
I wasn't aware we were here to impress each other with how much or how little we eat. My diary is closed unless I have an issue and need friends to look at it for a specific reason.0
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I feel like more people on here are encouraging others to over eat and not under eat. Give in to your cravings, just measure the ice cream so it can fit in with the day, just exercise more so you can still have your treats. More of that is on here than anything else. Few people suggest eating healthy. I think a lot of people on here have eating disorders and that is why they are trying to lose weight. Disorders are not just for the skinny folks. If you weigh 300 lbs you have a problem of some sort.
I stay around 1200 with a wide variety of foods and a lot of vegetables. I don't agree with trying to keep at 1200 if you are doing it with all shakes and bars with a taco bell dollar item tossed in every day. That isn't healthy.
This site has really opened my eyes to the food obsession in this country. My God, are you going to go into starvation mode if you can't squeeze in a damn cupcake? I had to cut out a lot of stuff when diagnosed with Celiac. I've gone through all the missing things. But I wasn't living off donuts to begin with.
I have blocked a person on here who is constantly saying anyone who eats 1200 calories is eating like a 6 yr old. I've seen her diary and she eats all crappy food and complains about being fat.
Don't take advice on health from anyone but your dr. Not people who claim to be nurses or whatever. Some people want to suck you into their world because they will never change theirs. The pro ana people can move on along with the chronic overeaters. If you want to be healthy then take steps to do so, don't make excuses. If you slip, start over. Don't make excuses. Leave the rest of us alone if we want to eat healthy and force feed. We don't all have disorders.
^^This
Myfitnesspal needs to work on getting a "like" button of some sort.0 -
I'm on a 1000-1100 diet strictly because I've had the Lap-Band Surgery preventing me from eating a ton of calories unless I drink them. I stick to my protein and exercise and try to eat my calories back if I physically can. Having a tiny stomach is something I'm still getting use to. I had the surgery back in April and dropped so much since then. People have the right to choose who that want to be friends with thats why there is a deny request. The same can be with anyone on any social network.0
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Out of curiosity - and this is a serious question - how do those of you who won't friend 'under 1200 calories' people know how many calories people eat before you friend them? A lot of people have friends-only diaries. Do you ask the person? Or do you simply not friend anyone who doesn't have a public diary?
I'm asking for practical reasons. My food diary is friends only. Would it be helpful if I put a disclaimer on my profile? Something along the lines of: 'By the way, I sometimes deliberately eat less than 1200 calories, because I like to sometimes have a couple of fasting days. I've been doing this for 18 years, on and off, and it always has tremendous positive effects on my health and wellbeing, and I've also read a great deal about it - so if you try to persuade me not to do it, however much I respect you, realistically I'm not going to obey you. On the plus side, I don't try to persuade anyone to convert to my personal eating habits - but if you feel you might be led astray by having access to my diary, better not friend me.''
(I know that comes across as a bit facetious - it's not intended, but honestly I'm finding this whole thing so ludicrous it's hard to know how else to word it! Basically, what I want to know is this: is this really seen as such a serious problem that those of us who don't fall into people's friending stipulations need to announce it on our profiles so that people are pre-warned?)0 -
Oh my... is this a post about choosing your friends?
Seriously... you are telling/judging/critiquing a person's choice of friends?
Oh my.
I am almost speechless. Is it not their choice who their friends are? For whatever reason, who is to question that?
I can see the original post is asking "why", out of curiosity, I would suppose... but, the thread has lead to a bit of bashing of personal choice.
For motivation and support it is quite understandable that your "friends" would be on the same path as you. And hopefully, within that you get a good mix to motivate you to your goals, whatever they may be. With all that said, here are the forums that are open to everyone so we can get a wonderful mix of people that can brighten our day, give us a laugh (when you don't take it personally), pump us up, and open our world to such variety.
DITTO THE ABOVE...^^^^^^
And, really people? shame on those who critisize or put judgement... Ya'll need to take a better look in the MIRROR!!0 -
This thread makes me feel huge, lol.
I'm 5'11" and MFP has me at 1900 calories to lose 1.5 lbs a week. I've been thinking about adjusting to try and lose 2 lbs a week. Even then, I'll probably still be at 1700 or 1800!
I've tried 1200 calories before and I was getting headaches and feeling fainty. I've tried 1500 and same thing. I think where I'm at now is darn near perfect. I've only been on MFP for about 2 weeks, but if I see that this really works (seems to be) I don't think I'm ever going down a(what I consider to be) starvation path again.
Personally I find it difficult to be friends with people starving themselves. Unless you've had a surgery or some type of digestive problem, would it really hurt you to have some healthy nuts, oils (flax, coconut), whole grain pastas? I mean, I go through my calories so easily I'm wondering if other people are eating bird seed and water or exercising everything they eat right back off.
I love food and consider it a joy in life, and I do not get pleasure from being restrictive with myself. But, I fear that I could get that way because I've been the kind of person to quit a diet because I couldn't be "perfect." ("Well I had an ice cream cone. All is lost now. Might as well just give up.") That is so illogical and that's really what I'm battling most of all. So the danger of going the other way is real for me, and I don't want to see myself adopt another unbalanced mentality about fitness.
Food restriction becomes a game for some people where they win an invisible trophy the less they eat or the hungrier they are. I didn't come here to adopt a new addiction, I came here to get rid of one. I'm a bit passionate on this topic because I had a cousin two inches taller than me who went fanatic on a crash diet and walking 8 miles a day. She lost all of her weight in a few months but aged herself horribly and became so mentally unstable. Lifesaver gummy snacks were her "supper" ... she's gained about 3/4 of the weight back over the last ten years. Just don't want that to happen to me, or anyone for that matter.0 -
Why would I want to friend someone who is eating 700 calories a day and complaining about how they can't lose the last 3lbs they need to lose because they are a total whale at 115lbs? I haven't seen 115lbs in probably 25 years, and I had almost that to lose when I found this site!
If someone is eating small amounts, in a balanced diet, under doctor supervision ( such as post bypass) I might consider it.
DING DING DING0
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