Women - Farting, Pooping, and more in front of men...
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My boyfriend and I have fart wars and we have a great relationship. He tells me he has to take a poo all the time so why can't I tell him when I have to? All he does is laugh and say "Go give birth to that food baby!!!" lol I don't think it has hurt our relationship one bit. In fact, I'm pretty sure we laugh more than normal couples do. To each his own, but if a man can't find the humor in a fart then he's not the man for me anyway!! You guys are really uptight hahaha Relax, go have some fun or something.0
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Some of the women in this thread are so incredibly hot, no guy is going to care which side of the fence they are on for this topic.
If the incredibly hot woman I am with prefers to keep these functions private, then that is how it would be in the relationship. If she is less concerned and open about it, then that works too.0 -
'BAHAHA' isss sooooo appropriate here. However this is quite disturbing, but terribly hilarious at the same time!!!
:laugh:Sometimes when I know it's going to be a bad fart, I slip it out and ask him if he can smell burning...he takes a deep breath in and BAM! There it is. I disgust myself sometimes.
He farted in K-Mart one day and took off leaving me standing there. A lady walked into it and gave me the worst look ever. He set me up and cackled about it for hours after.
BAHAHAHAHAHAA
I can still be a lady though...I promise! I laugh at all these people who imply my relationship is inferior because we fart. We are completely comfortable with each other. Farting is a great way to put a stop to an argument too...*PAAAAAAAAAAAAARP* and we're both giggling.0 -
I could KILL my fiance with my *kitten* :blushing: ... ...literally... As much as he doesn't "enjoy" it, lol, we are able to laugh and joke about it! 8-) And he better continue to handle it, because I can already tell our 1yo daughter has been blessed with my "gift"
:laugh:
Besides, with some of the things he does, sometimes it is a nice sweet revenge to suddenly have to take a poo while he is in the shower! Sometimes you just cant wait!!
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My Golly..what happens if you are having sex (making love, for you gentile ladies), and a queef happens?:embarassed:
Not sure I spelled it right..but we all know what I mean..
Do you get up in the middle of doing the deed, or break out laffing?
Laffing is so much more fun..but again..it was more fun stoned...:noway:
Sister Nicolette
Holy crap (the only kind my ladylike body produces!)-
I was going to go to sleep, but this thread seems like a better alternative. :drinker:0 -
i fart in front of my bf---we have jokes/games about farting (nothing gross, kinda like fake yelling at each other for doing it and quoting movies/shows about it) he hates hates hates it when i have to use the bathroom (i drink a LOT of water everyday) while he's in there either showering or shaving but somethings things coincide. we've been together for 10 years so we must be doing something right---farting doesn't hurt us at all........except for our noses but its short term0
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The people getting super offended makes this thread a hilarious bedtime read.
LOL!!! Yes it sure does!!
here i am laughing my butt off at this thread. Thanks MFP yet again... what a wonderful um... diet tool... yeah... um... uhhh-huh...
when i gotta fart or crap i gotta fart or crap. end of story. i dont brag about it but when i gotta use the can i make it noted and say something like OUT OF THE WAY I GOT DIBS ON THE CAN. yes only one bathroom in our dang house. 3 people 1 toilet... it can get hectic!0 -
Farts are funny lol. I've been with my BF for 8 and a half years (since I was 17) and I do all of the above. I have a loving, sexy, romantic, fun relationship too!! SOMETIMES (if I'm busting) I'll even go when he's in there. *GASP*
Ahahahahah!!0 -
Sometimes when I know it's going to be a bad fart, I slip it out and ask him if he can smell burning...he takes a deep breath in and BAM! There it is. I disgust myself sometimes.
He farted in K-Mart one day and took off leaving me standing there. A lady walked into it and gave me the worst look ever. He set me up and cackled about it for hours after.
In saying that...there's a time and a place. I don't do it in public or when we're around other people.
I'm going to have to try that as payback for the dutch oven my boy friend did the other night. Yes, I have the sense of humor of a 12 yr old boy.
I'm not going to hold my farts in front of my bf. That'll give me a tummy ache.0 -
Well..Well..Quite the conversation someone started.
My hubby and I have been on/off for 22 years.
We have seen, done it all.
Although, I will admit, it was funnier when we were smoking weed.
BTW, I don't fart~I Fluff!!!
And, should one "sneak out" or come out "like a marching band"..it is ALWAYS blamed on the DOGS!!!
I don't Poop-I "drop the kids off at the pool"-lol-heard that one at work.. cracked me up..but being a night shift RN, you can laff about anything!!
Seriously, bathroom time is finally PRIVATE TIME.0 -
'BAHAHA' isss sooooo appropriate here. However this is quite disturbing, but terribly hilarious at the same time!!!
:laugh:Sometimes when I know it's going to be a bad fart, I slip it out and ask him if he can smell burning...he takes a deep breath in and BAM! There it is. I disgust myself sometimes.
He farted in K-Mart one day and took off leaving me standing there. A lady walked into it and gave me the worst look ever. He set me up and cackled about it for hours after.
BAHAHAHAHAHAA
this convo is so funny to me.
i know we were all raised differently. but i come from a big greek family and this whole thing just has me cracking up.
i can just imagine being in the grocery store with my mom, she farts and dashes all the time and tries to leave me in a cloud of fart. it cracks me up and grosses me out at the same time but it's family you know?0 -
Only yesterday my neighbor told me and my wife that she never farts. Not that she doesn't bend over and let 'er rip right in front of her husband, but that she DOES NOT fart.
Personally, I think her assertion is ridiculous - - is it biologically possible to never fart? I find myself, once again, wondering why this is such a big deal for some women. The only thing that I can come up with is that many females are socialized to believe that such behaviour is not "ladylike." If that's what a person believes, that's fine. As a guy, I just want to be with a person who is comfortable with who she is.
My only question is this: Whatever one's stance on "the big squeeze," do we need to make a big deal out of it? :laugh:0 -
My Golly..what happens if you are having sex (making love, for you gentile ladies), and a queef happens?:embarassed:
Not sure I spelled it right..but we all know what I mean..
Do you get up in the middle of doing the deed, or break out laffing?
Laffing is so much more fun..but again..it was more fun stoned...:noway:
Sister Nicolette
LOL OMG ROFL0 -
Not gonna lie though, I used to hold them in at school. Cuz who wants to be a kid and get made fun of by all the other kids. I swear during grad ceremony someone would be like "Omg remember in 8th grade when Tabb farted...." Yah, I dont think so. But Ill admit, the tummy aches from holding were AWFUL!!! Not that Im not a lady about it now, but Im not feeling bad for what comes natural to my body! Those tummy aches HURT!!!0
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He's watched me give birth to our two children, I think any modesty I may have clung to went right out the window.0
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i know we were all raised differently. but i come from a big greek family and this whole thing just has me cracking up.
i can just imagine being in the grocery store with my mom, she farts and dashes all the time and tries to leave me in a cloud of fart. it cracks me up and grosses me out at the same time but it's family you know?
My grandmother used to fart all the time. When I was little, she blamed the dog. A little later, she just said, "more room out than in!"0 -
My only question is this: Whatever one's stance on "the big squeeze," do we need to make a big deal out of it? :laugh:
Seriously! I also posted in a thread about sexual fantasies and there were plenty of "in before the lock" posts. I think this thread has a better chance of being locked because of some of the nasty remarks. :noway:0 -
You wrote....I always seem to "fall in love" and have long lasting relationships
You look so young. Gotta wonder how many long last relationships you could have had at your age. What is your opinion of a long lasting relationship?
I am sure the dog in your profile picture could care less if you fart in front of him.
Best of luck to you holding in your gas.0 -
I used to have the princess mentality. I used to turn on the vent or run the sink when I peed and pooped in the bathroom, so it couldn't be heard. It took me two years of marriage and taking on a couple of step-sons to get comfortable with farting and the like. I wouldn't even SAY the word "fart" before then.:embarassed:
The kids think it's a riot, and we all laugh it off and blame each other. That being said, we only engage in the comedy inside of the home. We don't do it in public.
Also, I told my husband that if he ever tried to "dutch oven" me, he would wake up without his proper "tool" in the morning. Seven years in and still haven't been dutch-ovened... :flowerforyou:0 -
Only yesterday my neighbor told me and my wife that she never farts. Not that she doesn't bend over and let 'er rip right in front of her husband, but that she DOES NOT fart.
Personally, I think her assertion is ridiculous - - is it biologically possible to never fart? I find myself, once again, wondering why this is such a big deal for some women. The only thing that I can come up with is that many females are socialized to believe that such behaviour is not "ladylike." If that's what a person believes, that's fine. As a guy, I just want to be with a person who is comfortable with who she is.
My only question is this: Whatever one's stance on "the big squeeze," do we need to make a big deal out of it? :laugh:
A woman I used to work with once told me that she "doesn't do THAT" (referring to farting). She wouldn't even say the word. She told me that her body gets rid of all of her gas through belching that she does in private.0 -
I could KILL my fiance with my *kitten* :blushing: ... ...literally... As much as he doesn't "enjoy" it, lol, we are able to laugh and joke about it! 8-) And he better continue to handle it, because I can already tell our 1yo daughter has been blessed with my "gift" :laugh:
Besides, with some of the things he does, sometimes it is a nice sweet revenge to suddenly have to take a poo while he is in the shower! Sometimes you just cant wait!!
Oh and I forgot to add, he also gets the cup o cheese every now and then(see video below). BAHAHAHAHAHA!!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-xFaJUZRkQM 0 -
Sometimes when I know it's going to be a bad fart, I slip it out and ask him if he can smell burning...he takes a deep breath in and BAM! There it is. I disgust myself sometimes.
He farted in K-Mart one day and took off leaving me standing there. A lady walked into it and gave me the worst look ever. He set me up and cackled about it for hours after.
In saying that...there's a time and a place. I don't do it in public or when we're around other people.
I'm going to have to try that as payback for the dutch oven my boy friend did the other night. Yes, I have the sense of humor of a 12 yr old boy.
I'm not going to hold my farts in front of my bf. That'll give me a tummy ache.
^^^ Right!? No tummy aches here!0 -
He's watched me give birth to our two children, I think any modesty I may have clung to went right out the window.
Most ladies number two DURING this..........
Im sure he was NOT offended!0 -
'BAHAHA' isss sooooo appropriate here. However this is quite disturbing, but terribly hilarious at the same time!!!
:laugh:Sometimes when I know it's going to be a bad fart, I slip it out and ask him if he can smell burning...he takes a deep breath in and BAM! There it is. I disgust myself sometimes.
He farted in K-Mart one day and took off leaving me standing there. A lady walked into it and gave me the worst look ever. He set me up and cackled about it for hours after.
BAHAHAHAHAHAA
this convo is so funny to me.
i know we were all raised differently. but i come from a big greek family and this whole thing just has me cracking up.
i can just imagine being in the grocery store with my mom, she farts and dashes all the time and tries to leave me in a cloud of fart. it cracks me up and grosses me out at the same time but it's family you know?
^^^^ I too, am from a Greek family..and do the supermarket FLUFF and run with my daughter and boyfriend..ha ha.
Also, I noted on your profile, you are from "The WINDY CITY"!!!!!..
could it be all the GREEKS??????..
my parents are from there..ha ha ha0 -
i have been with my husband long enough farts, pooh and "other things" have become a contest to see who can gross the other one out more.
that being said i beleve in waiting to fart around somone until you know um realy well- or have some awsome beans0 -
I could KILL my fiance with my *kitten* :blushing: ... ...literally... As much as he doesn't "enjoy" it, lol, we are able to laugh and joke about it! 8-) And he better continue to handle it, because I can already tell our 1yo daughter has been blessed with my "gift" :laugh:
Besides, with some of the things he does, sometimes it is a nice sweet revenge to suddenly have to take a poo while he is in the shower! Sometimes you just cant wait!!
Oh and I forgot to add, he also gets the cup o cheese every now and then(see video below). BAHAHAHAHAHA!!http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-xFaJUZRkQM
GOD YES!!!!!!0 -
You wrote....I always seem to "fall in love" and have long lasting relationships
You look so young. Gotta wonder how many long last relationships you could have had at your age. What is your opinion of a long lasting relationship?
I am sure the dog in your profile picture could care less if you fart in front of him.
Best of luck to you holding in your gas.
I think you just won the thread. I Lol'ed0 -
I just farted...0
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"Clean eating" makes you fart too...all the healthy goodness. The fresher the veggies the fresher the fart I find!0
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So what about men- you're saying it's not okay for women to do these things. You think it's okay for men to? That's hypocritical.Despite all the sarcasm and nonsense that everyone else is posting, I agree with you. I believe that ladies shouldn't do that kind of stuff in front of another person. Its not attractive whatsoever. We all know we go but we should do it in private. I've been friends with my best friend for like six years and I think I farted in front of her like twice and it was on accident. Its just not classy to brag or talk about how you have to poop or burping in front of someone. Some ladies should get some class.
No, I don't think its okay for a man to fart next to me. He should have some respect.
:noway: I've said this before, and I will say it again, does that mean my partner doesnt repsect me because he farts in front of me all the time? Do I not repsect him because I always tell him when I have to poop? B!tch please.
First off, you could have enough common decency to not call me a *****. Ignorant. If you're all really going to get uptight about MY opinion, then you are really childish. Its an opinion. Get over yourselves. I have better things to do with my life then to sit here and defend myself.
You Mad Bro?
Then, why are you responding?0
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