Does everyone hate their job this much?

KrazyAsianNic

I agree with everyone else that says about finding something to help you destress. Leave work at work. Find something else to distract you hobby wise or make plans with friends after to let loose. This economy sucks and I would definitely not leave your job unless you for sure had another one set up. I also agree that starting your own business could be a good place to go. My boyfriend started his own business almost a year ago. I am startng the foundations of my own. My boyfriend and I also currently the main manager people for my father's business. Do what you need to do to support yourself (and your family if you have one). Don't let work ruin your life.

I also graduated recently (May 2012), and I was putting out a lot of applications until my dad offered me a job. I was torn between taking this internship that would pay me a nice amount for at least the rest of the year or following my dream of learning the family business to potentially take over when my dad's ready to retire and still be a type of stay at home mom (the way my dad is like a stay at home dad).

sobriquet84

*munches on my salad*

I'm so very glad I'm old and will never say I only partied twice in College.

it would probably be more accurate for me to say that when i partied for 5 years, i also went to school, did some homework and held down a full time job.

Look... we have something in common! :drinker:

jlarson123

Sounds to me like you've got a B-vitamin deficiency. Try taking a good food-based B vitamin supplement. (I'd recommend the MegaFood brand, and no, I have no connection to the company.) After years of being stressed out and approaching burn-out several times, this one simple change literally saved my life. Seriously, just try it for 2 weeks, and watch your entire outlook on life do a 180 degree shift. Just make absolutely sure it is a food-based supplement, as 98% of the stuff out there is synthetic and won't help much.

Andrewsvan

I feel your pain. I have applied to that many positions and had a handful of interviews that go nowhere, a couple of second interviews that go nowhere and one job offer in the past 3 years. I am edging toward 40 and have become proficient in two trades and knowledgeable in a couple other trades. I am unable to even find a $20 an hour job in either trade and have to work a third career path and side work in my second trade to make ends meet. I do what I have to do to feed, clothe and shelter my family. It's not you, it is a widespread problem due to the crappy economy. I'd encourage you to brainstorm during your down/ dead times for ideas to make money. Listen when others are griping about a bad service experience, think if it's a problem you can solve or expectations you can exceed if you offered the service. Use your time to think up ways to better yourself.

ZeroWoIf

I can't take it anymore! I graduated a little over a year ago and was the textbook overachiever in college. Dean's list, tons of awards, straight As, ran the college newspaper, editor for the lit mag and yearbook, 5 internships/jobs during the 4 years, and always always always working and doing homework. I think I partied twice while in college! I was lucky enough to get a position 3 months after graduation but I HATE it. I'm completely underemployed and although I was told I'd have the opportunity to move up, have been denied despite asking on several occasions. Managers mark me as an essential part of the team and a wonderful employee for every performance review, though. I am SO bored. I've started coming in "late" (although not technically late -- still the first one here and I work 9-10 hours a day) and working from home (something we're allowed on occasion).

I've started to have a physical reaction to work. I frequently cry myself to sleep, am a ball of anxiety anytime I'm home because I know I have to go back, and often hide in the office bathroom crying. I have mini panic attacks while at work (sweating, shaking, skin crawling, etc.) and am generally miserable all the time. Like I said, I'm BORED. It's not a hard job but it's so mindless (basically a secretary position) and I can't take it anymore! I'm an ambitious young woman. I know so many who would be happy and grateful to have my job so I'm not trying to sound like the "entitled youth" of today, but I've busted my butt and have gotten nowhere!! It doesn't even pay well and I'm struggling beneath my student loans.

Since I graduated, I have applied to 700 (yes, SEVEN HUNDRED) positions. I had three interviews -- one for the job I have now and two for the railroad, which was sexist the first time and hired the VPs daughter the second time. I've applied to everything, from Wendy's to management positions. You either need 5 years of experience or can do an unpaid internship while still in college. Insane! I've called places back, sent thank you letters from interviews, changed my cover letters to suit the job I'm applying for and nothing has worked out. The career services folks at my college called me the perfect candidate and said I was doing everything right, even sending out my cover letters to the entire senior class to show how it should be done.

Is this how all people are? Miserable and having panic attacks all the time and not caring about anything else because they are so focused on getting out of their job and into a new one? Everyone tells me this is just how it is. I don't mean to sound like a spoiled brat but I literally feel like I'm going to die in five years because of this position!! Please tell me this isn't how the rest of my life will be!

I think you need to speak with a professional.

xxthoroughbred

But, if your record is as great as you say, why are you a secretary. i don't have anything against secretaries, i don't mean it that way. But, how did you wind up in that position if you're such a rock star? Just curious, it's not a smart-@$$ question, but a serious one.

I'm not so much a rockstar, but I honestly believe I should be in the top...35-40% of grads looking for jobs based on my experience.

I also know several rockstars who graduated with me...are much better than me...and cannot find any decent positions.

i really don't mean to be rude, but have you been living under a rock for the last 5 years?

its a fact that new grads are having a tough time in the current job market. look for a new job, but suck it up and be happy you have one while you look. stop crying in the bathroom, put on a better attitude, and be a little greatful. even if its a simple "clerical" job, i'm sure there are a lot of people that would die for the job. obviously keep looking for a position that better fits your goals, but you aren't going to get anywhere if you're going to get THIS shaken up about your current job. employers will see right through your immaturity.

You're such a sweetheart!

You labeled me as a rockstar and I corrected you. OBVIOUSLY I know that grads are having trouble getting jobs.

How are they seeing through my "immaturity"? I've had my managers tell me I'm extremely mature and professional. No one knows I'm having these attacks.

smileycookie

I can definitely relate!!! I graduated 3 a little over three years ago. I got my Bachelors and Masters in Finance in 5 years and got a job right out of college. I hate my job. I am also underemployed, underpaid, and overworked. I have been with the company for 3 years and dealt with the same symptoms as you. With my job, I had emails coming to my phone and the phone rang all the time. During this time, I have been in and out of therapy because of the stress of this job. I developed IBS for a year until I learned how to manage that. When I negotiated my salary the last time, I made sure that we all agreed on several things: I worked from home 3 days a week, I needed an assistant, emails were to not come to my phone, and I could make my own hours. I have been happier but still searching for my dream job.
Keep sending out your resume and keep being the valued employee because you will need them as a reference one day. Think of this time as you gaining the experience you need to find your dream job.

xxthoroughbred

Welcome to the real world. Wow, you've spent a WHOLE year at your job already and it's making you sick? Get used to it. This is how real life is. Not everyone loves their job, but it's a means to an end. You're not entitled to anything, especially a year out of college, are you serious? Grow up and why don't you change your attitude towards your job? This would make your life a hell of a lot easier. You've got 40+ more years of work ahead of you. Times are tough. Be thankful you have a job at all. Wow. smh

Wow! You're so helpful!

1. I don't feel entitled.
2. I've worked more than a year.
3. Thanks for being such a sweetheart!! I LOVE your positive attitude!!!!!

Bibianna2012

Here is what you should do, keep a good attitude at the job you have (or at least look like you have a good attitude). Continue to search for a job, but not a Wendys level. Try a head hunter. Many of them take the fees from the hiring company not the the hireee. Network, network, network... BTW Ive been in the professional workforce for over 20 years, every job i have gotten (except for my first job at Wendy's in 1984) was through networking! (a friend of a friend said I was ok), but it was always through someone that was familiar with how I worked. (Not my aunts cousin).

What kind of job is your dream job? What ever that is, offer to try and help out in that capacity at a volunteer organization and create your own experience. If you are a go getter then this shouldnt be an issue. You can do a few hours a week. This is a great way to net work!

If Im hiring you and see wendys for a year on your resume, im going to think you probably arent ready for a advanced job. If I see that you worked at wendys but also lead the fundraising efforts for a local non-profit Im going to think: wow this great candidate is really getting the shaft by the economy but its great they are continuing to develop their career on their own.

No excuses that you dont have time. There are full time working moms who work more hours than you. Hope I dont sound harsh, but I am one of them and if I interviewed you that is what i would think, if you worked a job below you for several years. I would think why didnt you go out and do something that you can control. Again I dont meant to be harsh but that is just reality.

Best wishes. I have had several jobs that caused the same reaction in me that you describe, but once I started to do things that I could control, I became hopeful and hope is a tremendous thing.

jennifleurb

I really don't get this... what did you graduate in with all those awards that only makes you eligible for a secretary position?

B.A. in English/Creative Writing & Business with a certificate in Management.

ETA: Awards ranged from leadership awards to research awards.

You actually sound perfect for doing a PhD. You get paid a stipend (although not a lot) and get to write and research. Check it out. Marketing might be your area.

sobriquet84

Network, network, network

one of the best pieces of advice i've seen.

you've got to GET OUT THERE. seriously, have to have a social life if you're trying to be known. go to happy hour. have a couple drinks. engage with people.

bridgeto1984

So I get hating your job. I hate mine, too. But I think the biggest thing that is going to help you right now is a shift in attitude. As much as your current job sucks (and it sounds like it does), it doesn't have to be your job for life. Try this exercise: every morning when you get up, look at yourself in the mirror and make one quasi-work-related commitment to yourself. Every single day. It can be something easy. For instance "today I am going to ask the receptionist how her evening was" or "today I am going to smile and say hello to everyone I pass in the hallways on the way to the bathroom". Visit your local library and take a look at some books on stress management. Crying everyday at work is obviously not overly healthy for you. So find a different outlet for your stress. Stop letting your job control your life. You will be amazed what such a simple thing as a change in attitude can do for you.

You say that you are working OT as a means of making more money, but don't you think that if the place is sucking the life out of you, that maybe the OT is making your situation worse? There are other ways of making money. Start working minimal hours and instead use that time on finding a supplementary part time position. Contact a local advertising or editing firm about part time or freelance work. Offer editing services to University students. Look online for things to do - I seriously fill out online surveys for extra cash. It's not much, but it's completely different from my career and it's something I can do on my own time. This is the perfect time of year to look for part time work in the retail sector as usually stores hire additional staff for the holiday season.

HGibbons1017

I won't bore you with my life story, but I do hope that you consider checking into working with a therapist to see if 1) your expectations are too high 2) there are different ways to cope or 3) that job just sucks and you need to keep looking. I can't tell you what the answer is. Your employer might have an EAP (Employee Assistance Program) that would be a good starting point.

Regardless, you can't keep hating your job...it's a terrible way to live and you deserve to be happy and be able to support yourself. It's clear something has to change, but the change is going to be hard. It will be worth it in the end though if you can go to your job and function without tears!
Good luck!

wareagle8706

How are they seeing through my "immaturity"? I've had my managers tell me I'm extremely mature and professional. No one knows I'm having these attacks.

You'd be surprised what people see even when you think you're hiding it.

Just quit the damn job and move on. This is just ridiculous. Having a degree in general business adminstration is almost as useless as having an english degree. Why don't you go back to one of those jobs you worked that you "loved" so much if you hate this one. seriously. At this point you're obviously just loving this attention and drama.

travisseger

Very rare is it that you step off the college campus and into your dream job. This is true even when the economy is good, but it is especially true in a down economy. I graduated in 1996 (man, I'm getting old) during a much better economy than we have now. My fresh-out-of-college resume could stand up against any recent graduate - very near the top of the entire class, the very top of two departments, academic awards, two very impressive internships, etc.

Do you know what that got me? A low-paying job at the very bottom of the totem pole. It was in the industry I wanted to be in, but was about as far away as possible from the job I wanted to do in that industry. I did not like the job one bit. It bored me. It stifled my creativity so much that I was exhausted at the end of every day. But I came to work and did that job to the best of my ability for four years before I got my foot in the door of the department I wanted to be in. A department I have now run for the last decade.

Because of those first four years I have a greater appreciation for the position I have now. It wasn't handed to me on a silver platter just because I had a college degree and an impressive list of internships and awards. When I am looking to hire someone these days, with all else being even, I am much more likely to hire someone who has spent that time working hard in a position they may have been overqualified for over someone fresh out of school with an impressive resume. In my experience, they tend to appreciate the job more, work harder, and are more teachable. So keep your head up, a few years of this may be exactly what someone is looking for and may just turn out to be what eventually lands you a more desirable position over someone else.

During those first four years, I found things to do outside of work that kept my mind engaged and my creative juices flowing. It worked wonders on the stress and enabled me to head back to work each morning without that sense of dread. I was a young, married guy with little money, but I found things to do that were cheap or free. Many communities have a lot of free educational workshops. I took numerous free creative writing and graphic design workshops that I could have taught with my college degrees, but they gave me something to do besides stress about going to work the next day. I took a couple of free cooking classes. I bought a beat up guitar for $25 from a pawn shop and made an unsuccessful attempt to teach myself to play. The point is, there are things out there to do that can help relieve your stress without breaking the bank.

All of that said, life is short and it's not worth it to spend every day of it miserable. Ideally, you can find a way to tolerate your current job until you land that job you desire. But if you absolutely can't make it work, there will never be a better time to cut ties and move in a new direction. It's much easier to do when you are young and unattached than when you are older and have the pressures of a family, a mortgage, etc. Best of luck to you. I hope you find what you're looking for.

yoovie

Im madly in lust with my job.

i'm madly in lust with yr sexy azz! lol <3n-

three strikes, now we're friends

Rage4lightning

Right now, I love my job. But I've also been exactly where you are right now.

One of my previous jobs had me working mandatory 6 day work weeks with an average of 70 hours a week. I would often go home crying thanks to the stress. I'll never forget the day my supervisor found me crying in an empty room on one of my breaks. It was awful and I despised it. I had another job where the manager was an awful person who treated all of her employees like dirt. She was constantly gossiping about everyone who worked in the store. She would even call other store managers to gossip while out on the floor.

As for the job where I work now...well, like I said, I love it. In order to get where I am though, I had to endure 2 years of hell with the worst supervisor I've ever heard of. There are still people who used to work for her that get together to celebrate the fact that we survived that office. As a matter of fact, we're having dinner tomorrow night to celebrate her long over-due downfall.

Here is the best advice I can give based on my personal experience:

1.) Never stop applying. I know you've said you've sent out 700 applications. You're trying and that's fantastic! Maybe you should start trying other types of jobs though. Start thinking way outside the box. My current position has absolutely nothing to do with my degree. I never, ever would have thought about this position even existing before. Post your resume all over monster.com, careerbuilder.com, and whatever other resume sites you can find. You'll get a lot of spam, but you'll also get more ideas as to what is available.

2.) Find something - anything - that gives you an escape from this stress. Find a more vigorous work out, play violent video games, pick up a craft. Literally anything that you can do that will get your mind away from work. Personally, I play video games and crochet. Bonus for me: I sell my crafts so I get extra cash to help out with whatever I need/want.

3.) Spill your guts to your boyfriend or a friend for a set amount of time and then move on with your day. Do not dwell on how awful that place is. It just drags the rest of your life down. You need time to vent/rant so that it won't build up, but make sure you aren't spending all of your time doing so. I used to come home and vent to my boyfriend about all of the terrible things going on in the office for a full hour. Then, I'd let it go. My evenings were much more enjoyable and while I still dreaded going back into the office, I had the next evening to look forward.

4.) Network your heart out. Throw out your job hunting desires on Facebook and LinkedIn. Tell all of your friends and family. Any time you have the opportunity to express your desire for your dream job to someone, do it. People can't refer you if they don't know what might fit with you.

5.) Practice your interviewing skills. Google some practice interview questions and have your parents or friends pretend to interview you with them. Practice whenever possible. Practice until you're dreaming about those questions.

Hating your job isn't the "real world." Staying there when you're miserable is nothing more than resignation. You may well wind up in a job you don't love, but you shouldn't have to hate it.

RedHeadDevotchka

I can't take it anymore! I graduated a little over a year ago and was the textbook overachiever in college. Dean's list, tons of awards, straight As, ran the college newspaper, editor for the lit mag and yearbook, 5 internships/jobs during the 4 years, and always always always working and doing homework. I think I partied twice while in college! I was lucky enough to get a position 3 months after graduation but I HATE it. I'm completely underemployed and although I was told I'd have the opportunity to move up, have been denied despite asking on several occasions. Managers mark me as an essential part of the team and a wonderful employee for every performance review, though. I am SO bored. I've started coming in "late" (although not technically late -- still the first one here and I work 9-10 hours a day) and working from home (something we're allowed on occasion).

I've started to have a physical reaction to work. I frequently cry myself to sleep, am a ball of anxiety anytime I'm home because I know I have to go back, and often hide in the office bathroom crying. I have mini panic attacks while at work (sweating, shaking, skin crawling, etc.) and am generally miserable all the time. Like I said, I'm BORED. It's not a hard job but it's so mindless (basically a secretary position) and I can't take it anymore! I'm an ambitious young woman. I know so many who would be happy and grateful to have my job so I'm not trying to sound like the "entitled youth" of today, but I've busted my butt and have gotten nowhere!! It doesn't even pay well and I'm struggling beneath my student loans.

Since I graduated, I have applied to 700 (yes, SEVEN HUNDRED) positions. I had three interviews -- one for the job I have now and two for the railroad, which was sexist the first time and hired the VPs daughter the second time. I've applied to everything, from Wendy's to management positions. You either need 5 years of experience or can do an unpaid internship while still in college. Insane! I've called places back, sent thank you letters from interviews, changed my cover letters to suit the job I'm applying for and nothing has worked out. The career services folks at my college called me the perfect candidate and said I was doing everything right, even sending out my cover letters to the entire senior class to show how it should be done.

Is this how all people are? Miserable and having panic attacks all the time and not caring about anything else because they are so focused on getting out of their job and into a new one? Everyone tells me this is just how it is. I don't mean to sound like a spoiled brat but I literally feel like I'm going to die in five years because of this position!! Please tell me this isn't how the rest of my life will be!

I was like that about a year ago. I had frequent panic attacks and miserable....then I got fired :drinker: and got the current job I have and it's way too easy but I like it.
It's not all jobs, but there are alot of them like that, so you aren't alone.

LorinaLynn

I think hating your job that much can be quite normal, but reacting to it that strongly isn't. Have you talked with a doctor about your emotional response?

I had that kind of reactions on the job before... when I had severe depression and anxiety and a hostile work environment and my mother was in the hospital in an unresponsive state on a ventilator and dying.

Just a sucky job shouldn't have that kind of emotional pull.

HealthylivingTIG

I have to admit, I was in your shoes a few year ago... right out of grad school. I worked as a receptionist then. Over the years, it took a bit of job hopping to find my "fit". Try switching lanes. The idea is to find a job thats ideal for you and if this one has you crying in the bathroom and experiencing panic attacks, clearly this place isn't for you.

Know its not the end of the world and its not a reflection of YOU. I am sure you are still the smart over achiever as in college, however you just have to find the company that works for you and not the other way. The economy does play a part in what you are going through. Be thankful for the job. Unemployment is not fun so if you think you are having the worse time now, talk to someone who is not working.

Things will get better.