Age difference in relationships

eatcleanNtraindirty · October 2012

What's the oldest/youngest person you've dated? And what was/is the age gap?

I thought this would be an interesting topic.

The last girl (or woman) I dated is 36. I am 24. That is the largest age gap that I have ever experienced personally. I have dated +/- 3 years before that. Even with our somewhat significant age difference, we had the best relationship that I have ever been in. She says the same. We were best friends and great lovers. Everything was perfect except that I can't see myself having kids in 2-4 years when I'm ready with someone who would be potentially 40 years old. I'm sorry if this offends any of you around that age!! But as a 24 year old, 2 years out of college, I just couldn't fathom it. So when I moved away for work I ended it a couple months after the move. I moved 3 hours away. It really sucks because we were so awesome together. I looked forward to spending every moment I could with her and she the same with me. We enjoyed doing everything together, even grocery shopping.

I know some of you think I am an idiot for letting her go but to my defense, I do too. But nonetheless my viewpoint still stands that I wouldn't want to have a 40 year old birthing my children (whether it's safe or not) when I would still be under 30.

So what about you all??

LesleeBeAlive · October 2012

I think it depends on the people. My mom is 8 years older than my step-dad. They workout great.
I personally stick to no older than 4 years. No younder than 1.. Only because I am 22.

corn63 · October 2012

My boyfriend is 9 months younger than me. My father, however, is currently dating a woman 34 (I'm 28) and he's 51. I can't tell how okay he is with it, but I HATE It. She's rude, snobbish and behaves like she's 18.

LaurySch · October 2012

I used to be pretty specific about only dating guys older than me - my rationale was that guys mature slower

Then I got involved with my ex who was almost 10 years older than me and let me tell you, I've met 16 year olds who show more maturity than that lump of humanity!

As I get older I find I'm more open to relationships that I previously considered not appropriate. I think if you can find someone who you really connect with then age shouldn't be a deal breaker!

And I don't blame you for ending the relationship because you couldn't handle the difference - it would have been a lot worse if you'd taken the 'next step' and found that you just couldn't get past it!

MtnKat · October 2012

My husband is 9 years younger than me (at my age now, that makes me a cougar lol).

He was 19 when I met him...I was 28. I swear I thought he was older and then after a year of dating, I saw his drivers license for some reason. Well, by that time I was hooked and had to decide whether or not we should keep seeing each other (I say he lied to me about his age but he swears up and down he didn't...he just never mentioned it).

We've been together now for 17 years....the age difference didn't mean a thing. He is the love of my life....I doubt there will be anyone else for me.

Darkskinned88 · October 2012

Oldest i dated was 36, when i was 19....youngest was 18 when I was 21, I'm 24 now and when i do date women in their mid to laste 30s they simply aren't looking for what i am, they been there done that so they just want sex and someone to show off sometimes while I'm looking for something more serious, so in short it never works

Colonel_Brandon · October 2012

I have been involved with a woman 8 years older (when I was 28), and also with one 18 years younger (last year when I was 41).

In both instances, they came on to me.

It was trippy.

WeekndOVOXO · October 2012

The oldest was my age. The youngest was two years younger.

I wouldn't date someone 5 years older, however g&p is not out of the question.

My friend who was 20 lost his virginity to a 38 year old. Must've been fun telling her his real age :laugh:.

Charlie003 · October 2012

I was 20, she was 31.

jenaissance · October 2012

biggest gap was when I was 22 and he was 34.

Alex_is_Hawks · October 2012

I was 25 , he was 54....and to put it into perspective...my dad was 49 at the time.

so yeah......

we dated for a year and a half...

invisibubble · October 2012

Eight years between me and my fiancé. Same with my dad and his wife, actually. The controversy (if you will) with me and my guy was that when we met, 10 years ago, and started dating, I was 16.

Justkeepswimmin · October 2012

I"m 29 my hubby is 52 we met when I was 21. It doesn't help that I don't age as fast as would be expected...when I was 26 a highschooler thought I was in his class

Logistically we put the cut off at 50 (or I did) if we didn't have any biological children by then then that would be it. I do have a daugther adopted/step.

I would say that I can't answer if it's 'wrong' or not - only time will tell if I made the right decision for me and you made the right decision for you. There's no one size fits all when it comes to age differences in relationships. I do know that if I had held out like 6 more years guys my own age MAY have started to feel attractive (emotionally) to me...but I never met a guy in college I ever saw as long term material...perhaps it was the college I went to?

As it is my husband IS my husband and I don't know how to make that more clear because it's much more in depth that it sounds. He's part of me and I can't imagine life without him, and believe me with our age difference I try because it seems likely that may happen someday. However, I just can't fathom it, I know I belong with him.

ravenwcatz · October 2012

I'm not attracted to men younger than myself. Period. The youngest man I've been seriously involved with was two years older than myself. The oldest is my current, and is 19 years older than myself. And is probably the most compatible with me in many ways.

We're both artsy, he's turned me into a foreign film snob. He works for the symphony, I work for a theater. We both dabble in photography.

People have asked me if I notice the age difference. Not really. He's pretty athletic and keeps himself in good shape. Most of my friends tell me they would have thought he was about 35. (I... don't think so, but whatever. :P)

I'm sure some people would assume I'm a gold-digger or whatever, but if I am, I'm a pretty horrible one. We're both too bohemian to have a whole lot of money, but what we've got ends up consuming a lot of art.

It took him a year to tell me he loved me. But I'm pretty sure I believe him, moreso than anyone who might have said it before.

How's that?

CaWaterBug8 · October 2012

Welp, I'm 20 (will be 21 on Monday:bigsmile: ) and I'm dating a guy who turned 35 the day after we met.

Ginnyesq · October 2012

My boyfriend is about 5 years younger than me. I don't know that I would really be comfortable much younger than that. It only comes up occasionally when I say "I remember this song from High School" and he says "oh yeah, I remember it from 6th grade".

Skinny_minny_mo · October 2012

12yrs

i was 20. he was 32

HBinOC · October 2012

I am 38 now. My ex was 9 years younger than me- No one could figure that one out- I look younger and he looked older. It's not really about a number but the inside and" outside"- to be honest of a person. We split up for almost similiar reasons I was ready and he was not ( his immaturity being a factor- I had been there- done that and he still had oats to sow and yes- when I am 50 he would be 4O . I would date someone older or younger again if there is a connection. Relationships grow and develop much more than on age- If that is a factor I think there is more to the issue. ( my opinion) If you are regretting your choice and If it's not too late contact her- The " right ones" don't come along very often.

bethygirlie · October 2012

My fiance' is 24 and I'm 32. I love him with all my heart. It works out well because I act WAY younger than I am, and people have told me I look like I'm in my early-middle 20's.