Why don't women pay for dates?

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  • 3foldchord
    3foldchord Posts: 2,918 Member
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    last time I dated, I was 18/19. in college- NO MONEY!! the guy I was dating was 27 (my husband now) and an engineer with a good job. and no college loans (his parents footed the bill)
    He paid for everything. A chick can only pay if she has money.

    But, if I was 30, had a job, then yes, I'd pay. I'd d some of the 'asking/taking out/buying the tickets, etc.

    Last time I dated I was in my 20s and in college - but then we both had no money......Walks on the beach are nice (and free)....

    Beaches are nice. so are hikes- still some of my favorite dates. (I don't care for the d inner and a movie thing)

    what is weird though is when I plan an awesome date weekend with my husband, the hotel, the activities, lining up childcare (back in the day- they are older ow).... getting it all planned and paid for to surprise my husband... but it's his paycheck paying- cuz I am just a stay at home mom. .
    so sometimes I'll try to sell a few things on Ebay, or whatever so I can pay for my own surprise dates
  • turtlefitnessdad
    turtlefitnessdad Posts: 585 Member
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    Any body going to open the door for me?
  • turtlefitnessdad
    turtlefitnessdad Posts: 585 Member
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    Do men really still take your coat and open the doors? I mean AFTER first dates??? I have been missing out if so.

    uhh, yeah. that's called basic etiquette

    Seriiiiiiiously? We have it slammed home at every turn how the sexes are equal then when it comes to romance all of a sudden men are expected to treat a woman like she's totally helpless, broke, dumb, and completely incapable of even the most basic tasks? Let's ditch the ancient garbage and be real. Most of the "basic etiquette" a guy is supposed to have is just fake nonsense we're trained on. Look a little deeper ladies. You'll do better.


    this is what most of the ladies are saying i think sir
  • SteveJWatson
    SteveJWatson Posts: 1,225 Member
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    last time I dated, I was 18/19. in college- NO MONEY!! the guy I was dating was 27 (my husband now) and an engineer with a good job. and no college loans (his parents footed the bill)
    He paid for everything. A chick can only pay if she has money.

    But, if I was 30, had a job, then yes, I'd pay. I'd d some of the 'asking/taking out/buying the tickets, etc.

    Last time I dated I was in my 20s and in college - but then we both had no money......Walks on the beach are nice (and free)....

    Beaches are nice. so are hikes- still some of my favorite dates. (I don't care for the d inner and a movie thing)

    what is weird though is when I plan an awesome date weekend with my husband, the hotel, the activities, lining up childcare (back in the day- they are older ow).... getting it all planned and paid for to surprise my husband... but it's his paycheck paying- cuz I am just a stay at home mom. .
    so sometimes I'll try to sell a few things on Ebay, or whatever so I can pay for my own surprise dates

    To me thats kind of different, because you are running the house and his salary is half yours for doing so. This is the way I used to think of it when I was sole breadwinner.
  • sewerchick93
    sewerchick93 Posts: 1,440 Member
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    nothing makes a monday morning, like a post from Taunto :happy:
  • rockangel8907
    rockangel8907 Posts: 429 Member
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    I always offer to pay, and if he foots the bill the next date which is normally more chill I like to surprise him with bringing dinner. One of my favorite dates is just ordering a bunch of Chinese and sitting on the couch watching bad tv and talking....no dressing up, no going out, plus its easier should you want to go further ;) don't have to decide whosw place to go to!

    As for the chivalry thing, yes I expect to have doors opened for me, and my arm held when crossing the street when on a date, but I return the favor, I also hold open doors, I'm more than happy to cook for a guy ect.
  • Brianna716
    Brianna716 Posts: 303 Member
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    If the guy pays for the date I'll buy at least half the drinks that night. I'll pay for the next date and he can buy some drinks. Splitting the bill/paying your own way seems kind of weird, taking turns paying seems to feel less weird, for me at least...
  • Reza151
    Reza151 Posts: 517 Member
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    I always offer to pay, and if he foots the bill the next date which is normally more chill I like to surprise him with bringing dinner. One of my favorite dates is just ordering a bunch of Chinese and sitting on the couch watching bad tv and talking....no dressing up, no going out, plus its easier should you want to go further ;) don't have to decide whosw place to go to!

    As for the chivalry thing, yes I expect to have doors opened for me, and my arm held when crossing the street when on a date, but I return the favor, I also hold open doors, I'm more than happy to cook for a guy ect.

    ^THIS. Or if he pays one date, I'll pay for the next. Or I'll get drinks and the tip. Point is, NOT ALL WOMEN (actually not many women that I know) expect for the man to pay for everything.
  • BeingAwesome247
    BeingAwesome247 Posts: 1,171 Member
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    I always offer to pay, and if he foots the bill the next date which is normally more chill I like to surprise him with bringing dinner. One of my favorite dates is just ordering a bunch of Chinese and sitting on the couch watching bad tv and talking....no dressing up, no going out, plus its easier should you want to go further ;) don't have to decide whosw place to go to!

    As for the chivalry thing, yes I expect to have doors opened for me, and my arm held when crossing the street when on a date, but I return the favor, I also hold open doors, I'm more than happy to cook for a guy ect.

    Agreed^^^^

    If I'm asked out, yea I expect him to pay or I'll pay for myself. You asked me out. I'll offer to pay for my own or cover the tip but to be honest, it's just to be polite; I don't really want to.
    However, I don't go out much b/c it's not really in my budget. So if I'm asked out on a date, that I probably can't afford anyways....yea I'm not gonna want to pay
    Have I paid for a man's dinner before? Yea I have; no big deal.

    Find it offensive that some men actually have the nerve to compare paying for a date to prostitution....bet you make your mothers proud :huh:

    Trolling or not, posts like this make me thankful I'm single and rarely date
  • surromom2010
    surromom2010 Posts: 457 Member
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    *gets and pays for her own popcorn

    hrzfab.gif
  • andyisandy
    andyisandy Posts: 433 Member
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    threads like this...make me glad im gay lmao
  • gerard54
    gerard54 Posts: 1,107 Member
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    The same reason they dont open the car door for a guy...
  • ms_leanne
    ms_leanne Posts: 523
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    I must admit I agree in that lots of women go halves in the UK and many men expect women to pay their share.

    My other half does like to pay for a lot of things sometimes and on occasion I have to tell him no. We do also take turns picking up the food bill for both of us and his 11 year old son if he's joining us.
  • ahviendha
    ahviendha Posts: 1,291 Member
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    because if he pays i'll have sex with him. it's not easy to pretend i'm enjoying it, fake some noises, but if i have a free dinner and dessert in my belly? i can manage the effort of a fake "OH" face. but i won't snuggle without promise of a free breakfast.

    (being funny here folks! i fake all the time, not just when i am fed a free dinner)
  • vanguardfitness
    vanguardfitness Posts: 720 Member
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    That's my kind of country. Share all the house and man duties with the other wives.

    hahahaha
  • Beckyloo80
    Beckyloo80 Posts: 1,088 Member
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    lol very "Borat-esque" i think i'll hazard an answer.... it comes from the gentlemanly chaps of old england who would open a door for the lady, escort her (because she needs to be? :S) then pay for her meal, it became traditional from there i guess.

    there's also the fact most men will ask a woman out for a date with "can i take you out to dinner?" or similar which implies he's buying her dinner, would seem a bit odd to say "i quite like you can you buy me dinner please?" lol

    ^^ I like this answer.

    But If i were to ask a man on a date, i would pick up the chq, if he asked me, then it would be the other way around.
  • brianyeager
    brianyeager Posts: 44
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    The question: "Why don't women pay for dates?" My answer: A real man will not allow it! I still try, after 18 years of marriage, to never allow my wife to even open a door. A woman is precious to a man (I Peter 3:7). A moral woman is more precious than fine jewelry (Proverbs 31:10). Thus, a man treats her delicately and with respect.
  • pinchincents
    pinchincents Posts: 15
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    Because most men in America know how to be a gentleman and treat a lady, unlike in your country where you use women for your own personal satisfaction. Thankfully for you and me, we do not live in the same country and can appreciate the way it is where we are.
  • pinchincents
    pinchincents Posts: 15
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    This makes me proud to be an American. :) God bless you and your family Brianyeager. My husband is the same way. :)
  • Beckyloo80
    Beckyloo80 Posts: 1,088 Member
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    The question: "Why don't women pay for dates?" My answer: A real man will not allow it! I still try, after 18 years of marriage, to never allow my wife to even open a door. A woman is precious to a man (I Peter 3:7). A moral woman is more precious than fine jewelry (Proverbs 31:10). Thus, a man treats her delicately and with respect.

    :flowerforyou:

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