another fat shaming post

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  • tracieangeletti
    tracieangeletti Posts: 432 Member
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    Whether or not it is motivating is dependent upon an individuals goals. We all came her to shed weight, therefore, your responses will pretty much resonate with motivating. However, apparently this lady who made these comments intends to stay big. But rather than her being demotivated, because she really isn't motivated in the first place, it's more likely that it is causing her to feel some measure of guilt for treating her body so badly.

    I soooo agree. These people do recognise that they're treating themselves badly but just don't want to admit it. I don't know one overweight person who is genuinely happy being overweight (me included) - despite what they like to pretend to themselves and everyone else. Think of all the restrictions on your life - you can't go and play with your kids, you struggle fitting into swings and rides at the park etc, your health suffers, you set a bad example for your kids, you struggle buying shoes & clothes cos you need wider fittings or bigger sizes. For instance, I'm not particularly large (UK 14) and I hate going into a normal high street stores to buy clothes. Why? Because it is so hard to find anything that fits well or makes me look and feel good in. If I feel that then surely someone bigger than me must feel that too!

    Yes society makes everyone feel a bit pressured into being smaller / fitter / prettier etc but think what we'd become if there was no pressure and everyone just let themselves go - I dread to think!! I also think that it is natural to want to look and feel your best. Yes, everyone should be treated equally regardless of their size and yes it's ok to have curves - but when the curves become tyres of fat putting pressure on all your vital organs it's just not pretty regardless what anyone says.

    These people just don't want to admit to themselves that their size makes them unhappy and unhealthy because that means that they need to make the first step and do something about it, and I think without a good kick up the backside or that first heart attack (if they survive it) to bring them into reality, sadly they just won't ever admit it to themselves because it requires effort and commitment which they're not willing to give - they've let it go to the point where it's easier for them to do nothing!

    In my opinion this is a selfish attitude because they either don't think or don't care about the effect their lifestyle has on their family & friends who probably worry about them on a daily basis and not to mention the huge strain on the health service with billions of taxpayers money being spent every year on weight related illnesses. Being overweight is mostly self inflicted (there are some who are overweight through medical reasons) but it is also treatable and the money spent every year on obesity could be put to better use such as vital funding for research into cancer etc which is not treatable and not self inflicted.

    Sure everyone struggles, but if you don't love yourself and respect your body the way you deserve to in order to enjoy your life, nobody else is going to do it for you and I for one would rather put in the effort to make sure that I am as fit and healthy as I can be in order to enjoy my life with my sons and to ensure that I will be there for them for as long as possible and to give them the best possible start in life by setting them the example they need to make sure that they know the importance of eating healthily and looking after themselves for when I'm not here.

    Sorry if i ranted but these people just make me MAD!!! All it takes is a bit of effort even if it's only a little bit at a time - at least you're taking responsibility for yourself, your health and you're future.

    You basically just described who I was before I realized who I was and decided to change. Everything you've said is completely true.. Very well worded.

    Ditto :flowerforyou:
  • fayeonherway
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    Do they post the pics a few years later when NINETY FIVE PERCENT have gained back all weight lost ... and usually more? This is the reality. Those "after" photos are the photos of the FIRST part of the weight cycling process that CAUSES most people to gain more weight than when they started. To get OFF the WEIGHT CYCLING merry-go-round, focus on self-care and body appreciation in the body you have today. (And stop promoting your temp weight loss to encourage others to weight cycle.)

    WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU???????

    This is a serious question.
  • VickiDiane22
    VickiDiane22 Posts: 118 Member
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    I find them very motivational. They lift my spirits on a day when I don't want to workout or want eat over goal. I'm proud of what they have done. their stories are just fantastic to me!
  • lwagnitz
    lwagnitz Posts: 1,321 Member
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    I think they're motivational. For the person positing it shows that they are proud of what they worked really hard for. If someone sees that as fat shaming that have some issues.
  • tracieangeletti
    tracieangeletti Posts: 432 Member
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    Do they post the pics a few years later when NINETY FIVE PERCENT have gained back all weight lost ... and usually more? This is the reality. Those "after" photos are the photos of the FIRST part of the weight cycling process that CAUSES most people to gain more weight than when they started. To get OFF the WEIGHT CYCLING merry-go-round, focus on self-care and body appreciation in the body you have today. (And stop promoting your temp weight loss to encourage others to weight cycle.)

    WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU???????

    This is a serious question.

    I sorta see what she is going for here. I truly believe that to have lasting weight loss you have to look at some of the emotional issues that led you to be fat in the first place. If you do not honestly address these issues they will arise again. When I was younger, not really that many years ago, I kept dieting with the thought that not only will I be thinner but everything will be better, I'll be different, more confident, cooler. Not so much. I was still me. There was just less of me. All of my issues with food and weight come from low self-esteem. Every single one of them. I am finally at a point in my life where I've been able to look at them honestly and openly. I have truly learned a lot about myself and in doing this my self-esteem has greatly improved. I now see myself as worth the effort to take care of myself, and that I should demand more of and for myself. When I came to this realization the diet and, more importantly, the exercise changes followed. I would exercise before and quit because it became painful and "well, you know your just going to quit anyway, you're not strong enough to do this" , but this time it is different. This time I know I'm strong enough to do this, that I'm capable of doing it. It's been a year and a half and I'm still doing it. I really feel the self-esteem and the self acceptance have to come first though.
  • nnicolelilliann
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    Hahah as it is my profile picture... To me it really helps me realize what I was doing to myself, and helps me seem mentally and physically I was slowly killing myself. It reminds me to never become that person again! I have come to far to look back and its just a reminder!
  • smantha32
    smantha32 Posts: 6,990 Member
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    (my computer crashed the first time I typed this out, so hopefully it wont this time)

    Do you consider progress pics and before and after shots a form of fat shaming? I read a blog post about it on tumblr where the author was a heavy woman who hates the idea that the fat version of someone is not good enough for everybody. Most of the comments that agreed were from heavier people who say we should love ourselves no matter what size we are and that getting thin is a way to keep women weak and helpless (lol at weak and helpless). Another comment stated that she stopped posting progress pics because the best progress is what you cannot see. Do you agree?

    Do you think it's a form of fat shaming or do you think it's motivating?
    Why do you post or dont post progress pictures?

    Sounds like a lazy person dumping on people who are doing what she won't.
  • jerryallegood
    jerryallegood Posts: 31 Member
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    Personally, when I congratulate someone on their progress, I'm not saying "wow you were fat and disgusting before and now you're skinny and pretty". I'm really saying "you've worked your *kitten* off to achieve a goal and you are doing it / have done it, excellent job". That's the difference.

    Now that is the right way to say it. I still am obese. But I am working hard and making progress. I love watching others' progress. The photos help motivate me. They say to me, "You can do it!"
    And it is important to congratulate anyone who makes the smallest increments in progress sometimes. Working hard has its reward.
  • MinimalistShoeAddict
    MinimalistShoeAddict Posts: 1,946 Member
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    I think they are motivating. Most people post their stories because the are proud of the progress they have achieved. The intent of the success stories I have seen is rarely if ever to shame anyone. They are meant to inspire others.
  • getfitcharles
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    someone losing weight because they want to genuinely and to feel happier in themselves is a good thing. surely fat shaming is a different concept entirely, when the person is made to feel awful by others for being overweight. progress pics are as much about a gain in confidence as weight lost.
  • Warchortle
    Warchortle Posts: 2,197 Member
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    I think when people see there are so many different routes and that anyone can succeed if they want it is more motivating than anything else. No one would order P90x if they saw someone get fatter and be in worse shape. The idea is to get people to start. Starting for a lot of people can be the biggest obstacle.
  • leeanneowens
    leeanneowens Posts: 319 Member
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    I love to see progress pictures. I joined this site to lose weight and see my weight loss as an accomplishment. I think people who post progress pics feel that way too. They have worked hard and have every right to be proud of what they have accomplished. It is very motivating to me.
  • michelle7673
    michelle7673 Posts: 370 Member
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    Not to be insensitive, but no. I don't think it's "fat shaming", unless even the idea of a site that is about weight loss and fitness is too.
  • Crochetluvr
    Crochetluvr Posts: 3,143 Member
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    .... getting thin is a way to keep women weak and helpless (lol at weak and helpless). Another comment stated that she stopped posting progress pics because the best progress is what you cannot see. Do you agree?

    Do you think it's a form of fat shaming or do you think it's motivating?
    Why do you post or dont post progress pictures?

    I felt much weaker, physically, when I was 210 pounds.

    You can see my progress pic in my avatar. I like seeing the difference in what I looked like then compared to more recently. I never hated my inside self.... just the shell it was trapped in.
  • Steffani911
    Steffani911 Posts: 196 Member
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    I consider it motivation. When I think about what I need to do to get where I want to be, I feel a little overwhelmed. When I see others pics, I think "hey they did that! So can I!"

    Inspiring.
  • BrendaLee
    BrendaLee Posts: 4,463 Member
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    No fat shaming. No weakness. It's actually a very powerful thing to be able to say "look what I've accomplished." If you can help to motivate someone else along the way, even better.
  • wendybird5
    wendybird5 Posts: 577 Member
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    I post photos to see how far I've come for my health. It's a way for me to visually assess my progress and a reminder of how far I've come.

    Losing weight for me wasn't about looks. It was about my health, about being able to be more active and stronger and about accomplishing something that was important to me. People tell me that I looked beautiful before and now, but they understand why losing the weight was important to me, how hard I worked at it and they are applauding that.

    When I was bigger, the only one who ever shamed me or made me think I wasn't good enough was me. I'm not ashamed of who I was. She was smart and had a lot of adventures, made some great friends and was brave enough to go for her dreams even when no one else believed in her. But I'm so happy to be stronger and faster and that I feel better, but most of all, after years of failing at everything I tried, I finally accomplished one of my goals and that feels amazing and makes me want to try even harder on my other goals.

    You teach people how to treat you and if you feel shame or don't feel good enough, then you are going to read into every other person's actions the same message whether it was intended that way or not.
  • 77tes
    77tes Posts: 7,919 Member
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    Are graduation celebrations shaming of people who have not graduated?

    I love to see progress/success pictures and find them encouraging. They made me feel like what seemed impossible (and some "experts" even say IS impossible) could be done.

    I'm not a better person than I was when I was fat, but I am a healthier one.
  • jenilla1
    jenilla1 Posts: 11,118 Member
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    I think it's motivating and inspiring.

    People's fatness or lack of fatness doesn't bother me at all, but then I guess I'm a confident person. I don't worry about being fat because I think it's shameful. I worry about it because I think it's unhealthy for me.

    People have the right to post their progress and feel proud of their accomplishments. If you're ashamed of your fatness then don't post your pic. If you're ashamed of other people's fatness, or you feel ashamed when you see others making progress when you're not, then don't look at their pics.

    The rest of us shouldn't have to hide because you might feel shamed by us. I don't know why it's so wrong for people to celebrate their achievements. People, stop being so sensitive! :tongue:
  • smantha32
    smantha32 Posts: 6,990 Member
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    Being fat ISN'T good.

    It's bad.

    Nobody aspires to be fat.


    Some people actually do. And I have to agree that it's bad.

    http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-2026964/Susanne-Emans-bid-worlds-fattest-woman-52st-mother-2-supersizing.html