Can husband motivate wife to lose lbs w/o being a jerk?

If your husband could have written this (and trust me, he didn't), then let me speak for your husband and say that 99.9% of the time he isn't at all worried or concerned about your imperfections, but instead appreciates all of the wonderful things that make the two of you happy together. He is busy appreciating everything that you do for him - the way you make him laugh, the many things you do to make his life more enjoyable, the great sex, the ways you make him want to be a better person, the moments you get to spend alone, and all of the other ways that you enrich his life. When he see's you in the nude, his eyes are instantly drawn to the parts of you that he loves best and his mind very quickly goes to the fun you two could have together (even if the kids are in the next room). When he does notice a small flaw here and there (and I'm not saying he does), he immediately feels bad for even noticing and reminds himself that he is lucky to be with you. If he notices that another woman is a bit fitter than you are, he instinctively reminds himself of everything in your life that makes it difficult for you to stay in perfect shape and assumes that the other woman doesn't have to worry about the same challenges. What I'm saying is that, just because men may sometimes notice imperfections in their wives and even if they are occasionally neanderthal enough to actually mention such imperfections to their wives (or start a cowardly internet thread discussing the issue in abstract), that doesn't mean that these men are constantly critiquing their wives or girlfriends or that they are unhappy in any way. I clicked "reply" without looking closely at your profile picture or other photos (so I can't say from personal observation), but you should trust that your husband finds you beautiful and sexy and know that you are much more aware of and obsessed with your imperfections that he is. Mostly, he's just happy you're there.

Thanks everyone. I appreciate that some of you were able to see that I do, in fact, love my wife very much and appreciate all of the many wonderful things about her. I was asking about a very small detail in our life together, kind of like someone noticing a leaf blower in the distance on a beautiful, peaceful, quiet summer day. It doesn't mean they aren't having the time of their life. I chose this forum of discussion because I felt it would be a way to get some meaningful, anonymous feedback with zero chance of hurting my wife's feelings. Don't forget, none of you know the first thing about either one of us other than the abstracted details that I shared. At the same time, I take no offense at those of you who assumed I was just another pig. It's natural, especially in this setting, and I intentionally hid all personal details that might have cast me in a more complimentary light.

For you women who might be interested in motivating your man to get into better shape, you should not assume that your man will react to criticism the same way you might. Some of us are simpler creatures and respond to much simpler motivations. I had a friend in graduate school whose wife said once during sex, "You're kinda squishing me and making it hard for me to breath." He promptly lost about 80 lbs and has been very fit ever since.

I really appreciate the comments. I would never want to do anything that would hurt her. The truth is that she is pretty fit. She runs, cycles, lifts weights and generally probably works out 4-5 times a week. I know, the more I praise her wonderful qualities, the more I realize that I just need to count my blessings, appreciate the good things (not the least of which is peace in our relationship) and not say anything. She's talked about training to do a triathlon together. Maybe I should just focus on that.