Unsupportive....wwyd?

I'd leave. That is emotional abuse and they are trying to manipulate you to make you think you don't deserve better.

Example.
You forget to take chicken out for supper, immediately they start yelling saying things like you're a fat,lazy tub of lard... Stretched out and better treat him better cause no one else will ever love you.. You're ugly and everyone else can see it, why even bother..



You have been with this person for well over 5 years and have kids together... WWYD?

That's NOT lack of support... that is abuse, anger and hatred. The guy also has CONTROL ISSUES (wants to control you). My wife and I have NEVER said anything like that to each other, and we have been together 15 yrs. I agree with the majority, send him packing!

I'd kick him in the balls, then take the kids and leave. And I'm not joking. It'd probably be worse for him than that. Don't ever let anyone treat you like that. No one deserves that.

We aren't married.. Engaged.




And I think I might have to go find myself a wife :-P

DON"T GET MARRIED!! Kids don't mean you have to get married! If he talks like that now imagine what it would be like if you had a serious problem? Gesss what a jerk!

My husband wasn't very supportive at the start but he got on board once I joined WW and he saw I was serious. Now he's glad he did because I've lost quite a bit and I even gave him the go ahead to buy me lacy things that he likes :blushing:

This is abuse. Verbal, emotional abuse. Divorce him.

I'll Bet ya 5 bucks he is cheating on you and is afraid you will do the same.
He wants to keep you fat and insecure so he can continue.

Dump the idiot right now.

I don't disagree with this. There is some truth to it. My only opinion is that you have children together and should work it out. But the way he talks to you is inappropriate and is verbally abusive.

Holy crap. There's no way in hell I'd let a man talk to me like that. Do NOT marry this dude. Trust me, I left my ex-husband and I had a 5-year old and it's WAY harder to divorce with kids. You do NOT deserve this. He is verbally abusing you.

Example.
You forget to take chicken out for supper, immediately they start yelling saying things like you're a fat,lazy tub of lard... Stretched out and better treat him better cause no one else will ever love you.. You're ugly and everyone else can see it, why even bother..

Somehow, somewhere over the last five years, he has learned that it's okay to speak to you like this.

How did that happen?

I strongly suggest that you take an assertiveness course to help gain some much needed self respect and give you the tools you need to deal with difficult situations, and then tell him quietly but firmly that he needs to treat you with respect or you are not prepared to continue the relationship.

He does not have to be supportive of your efforts, but being abusive is not acceptable either.

Don't know if you'll even see this because it is 10 pages of responses already, but it makes me wonder. Is he cheating and does not want to to be even more desireable to others, (I did say more because you said something about not feeling attractive and that is just not true) or does he have a low self esteem already and think that if you do some improvements that you will get more attention and find someone better than him? The reaction to the chicken thing is just unacceptable. The next time that happens (since the first has passed) I would tell him if he ever talks to you like that again, you will test out his theory. treating a woman in an abusive way is NEVER ok. The only addendum I would place on that is it only becomes ok when the woman accepts it as ok. If you don't respect yourself enough to not put up with that then why should he. You seem like a great person so do what you need to so you can get healthy for you and your kids and don't let him keep disrespecting you.

I would make the first call to the lawyer and pack his ****! Kids or not... that is what they learn, Mommy can be treated like that and that it is ok for him to treat you like that. I would also make him pay for every nasty unsupportive word.

BUT that is just me!

Honestly if that is the kind of things someone/anyone is saying to you then you deserve better. I know that it is scary to strike out on your own with kids but there are a lot of people doing it, maybe you are getting healthy and someone who realizes who you are and what you are all about will come along.

You deserve all the happiness in the world. And I just saw a post saying that you were not married RUN, if not for the weight loss, RUN To save your life and your future. Losing him may be the best weight loss you ever had!

Either way hang in there!