Is it okay her boyfriend pushed her in anger?

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Replies

  • DaughterOfTheMostHighKing
    DaughterOfTheMostHighKing Posts: 1,436 Member
    no one has the right to hurt or abuse anyone. she should leave him now before he gets worse.
  • shoshi68
    shoshi68 Posts: 407 Member
    Nope. Not okay.
  • invisibubble
    invisibubble Posts: 662 Member
    We're only reading one side of it, and that's third-hand, we don't know exactly what was said, what was done, or what was going through either of their heads. He didn't hit or hurt her as far as I read, so I don't see the massive red flag.
    People wouldn't freak out like this if it was a man saying his girlfriend had done this.
    It could be a very bad sign indeed, but it could also be harmless. We weren't there.
  • auntdeedee87
    auntdeedee87 Posts: 706 Member
    All these men concerned about women attacking them must run with a much more violent crowd than me.

    Equality has nothing to do with common sense. Jesus, the things that come out of people's mouths these days worry me, So because I want to have equal rights as men, I also need to be okay with them beating me up?

    hmmm... i think you may have just read the bits you wanted to.

    Its NOT ok for anyone to go around beating anyone up. However, if you were to come at me aggressively, i wouldnt hesitate to use a suitable measure of force to block, defend, restrain or whatever was needed. If you dont like that, then dont be the aggressor. it really IS that SIMPLE.

    ETA: you might be really tough and kick the snot out of me, who knows? lol


    I'm not saying you shouldn't do what you could to keep me away from you or protect yourself, but a counter-attack is unneccesary. That's what I'm saying.

    There are men who are in the school of thought, well, if women want everything to be equal, then if you should hit me, I'm just gonna hit back.

    I'm not trying to justify violence, in fact I hate it, but I'm just saying two wrongs don't make a right and it's not a 2+2=4 issue.
  • jetscreaminagain
    jetscreaminagain Posts: 1,130 Member
    If she was coming at him aggressively then he had the right to push her.

    Wrong. and to the OP's question, it is time for her to leave the relationship.Period and done.
  • DevanEve
    DevanEve Posts: 130
    So with this... if she was coming at him very aggressively, like about to hit him, then pushing is one way to get the girl off of himself but normally what I see is the guy just restrains the girl so the situation can come back down a couple of dials. As far as him pushing her head afterwards... f*** that.

    If I was coming at my boyfriend (we've never been physically violent with each other) and he pushed me off of him in anger I would probably realize that I started that part. But if he pushed my head after I stopped trying to physically attack him then it's go time. Because that right there isn't okay.
  • dcurzon
    dcurzon Posts: 653 Member
    So with this... if she was coming at him very aggressively, like about to hit him, then pushing is one way to get the girl off of himself but normally what I see is the guy just restrains the girl so the situation can come back down a couple of dials. As far as him pushing her head afterwards... f*** that.

    If I was coming at my boyfriend (we've never been physically violent with each other) and he pushed me off of him in anger I would probably realize that I started that part. But if he pushed my head after I stopped trying to physically attack him then it's go time. Because that right there isn't okay.

    taking this example, shouldnt he be dumping you for attacking him in the first place?
  • DevanEve
    DevanEve Posts: 130
    So with this... if she was coming at him very aggressively, like about to hit him, then pushing is one way to get the girl off of himself but normally what I see is the guy just restrains the girl so the situation can come back down a couple of dials. As far as him pushing her head afterwards... f*** that.

    If I was coming at my boyfriend (we've never been physically violent with each other) and he pushed me off of him in anger I would probably realize that I started that part. But if he pushed my head after I stopped trying to physically attack him then it's go time. Because that right there isn't okay.

    taking this example, shouldnt he be dumping you for attacking him in the first place?

    That is also very true. We haven't been physically violent with each other (if we're really upset we just take a walk to cool off) but I'm pretty sure even if it got to that point we would just call it quits. I was just trying to relate to the original post.
  • dg730
    dg730 Posts: 62
    He sounds like a puss.
  • jjscholar
    jjscholar Posts: 413 Member
    I maybe a bit old fashion, but it is never OK for a man to be physically violent against a woman...
  • deadliftfan
    deadliftfan Posts: 66
    I maybe a bit old fashion, but it is never OK for a man to be physically violent against a woman...

    I guess you're old fashioned. Having grown up in a post feminist world, I think that men and women have equal rights and responsibilities.

    I treat men and women the same. If someone hits or is going to hit you, you have every right to defend yourself. You wanted equality - now you have it. Suck it up.

    #Uppercut
  • MaryJane_8810002
    MaryJane_8810002 Posts: 2,082 Member
    Honestly if a dude laid his hands on me in any situation (me sitting down, etc)

    6772430817_ec2803618f.jpg
  • norcal_yogi
    norcal_yogi Posts: 675 Member
    make sure your 'friend' knows that pushing/shoving, etc... is *not* something to be tollerated in a relationship. you shouldn't have to. at. all.
  • NeedANewFocus
    NeedANewFocus Posts: 898 Member
    Unacceptable!
  • MaryJane_8810002
    MaryJane_8810002 Posts: 2,082 Member
    Okay now that the trolling has stopped I have to say this:

    Abuse is NEVER okay on either side. If she was really going to attack him then he should have called the POLICE! I know many have said that "its all about equality, she wants to fight like a man then get knocked out like a man" but the same goes for him. If he does not want to fight her then get out of the way and get help.
  • apocalypsepwnie
    apocalypsepwnie Posts: 373
    It is never ok to hit or push. Ever.
  • misskittyfantastico1991
    misskittyfantastico1991 Posts: 145
    To the OP, it's not ok. I'm of the view that since (generally) men are a lot stronger than women, it should be a hands off approach. While I do see why he pushed her the first time, the second was uncalled for and a major red flag.
  • TropicalFlowerz
    TropicalFlowerz Posts: 1,990 Member
    If she was coming at him aggressively then he had the right to push her.

    Would you rather him push her or punch her he would of push her out of his way because she got him wound up I tend to get a push every now an again when I get in his face because I o he won't hit me hahah
    ....

    WOW ! I think u just set us back to the 50's!.:angry: ..would i rather get a push or a punch??...hmmm let me think...HELL NO!
    and just cause You get pushed every now and then??...thats Ok???..because u get in his face.?..hmmmmm..
    How bout this,...we are adults and we talk,..or go walk off the steam.,...AND COOL DOWN,..yeaaaaahhh.:noway: I'd b alone b4 settling for a man that treats any less than the way I should be!-FACT:wink:
  • thoseblueeyes
    thoseblueeyes Posts: 812 Member
    He had no right to put his hands on her at ALL. A real man would walk away.
  • Temporalia
    Temporalia Posts: 1,151 Member
    toxic relationship if you ask me
  • beccannes
    beccannes Posts: 88
    Not acceptable. Even if it did not hurt her physically I feel like that behavior is disrespectful and demeaning. With that being said if she went after him physically that would be wrong too... now if she was just questioning why his ex was sending him a package and he got upset at her and acted in that way towards her that is 100% wrong. I am sure that if the tables were turned and her ex sent her a package he def. would be questioning why.
  • Shannon2714
    Shannon2714 Posts: 843 Member
    I always thought it was acceptable...until the push turned into a punch and a punch turned into a choke.

    It is NEVER ok for someone to put their hands on their partner in anger. Even just to push them. If he didn't want her to touch him, he could have put his arms up and told her not to.

    I hope she addresses this with him quickly and that he doesn't do it again.
  • Louisianababy93
    Louisianababy93 Posts: 1,709 Member
    If your relationship is to the point of you or the other person want to hit each other then you need to "just break up"..
    A domestic violence charge isn't worth it!
  • TropicalFlowerz
    TropicalFlowerz Posts: 1,990 Member
    If your relationship is to the point off you hitting one or the other, you need to "just break up"

    I agree w/ this lady,..and violence is Never the answer,..that said To all the STUPID MEN ON HERE ASKING DO WE WANT EQUAL RIGHTS OR NOT???,..Equal right was for things like voting,driving,.equal choices.etc...Not,I repeat Not the choice to go toe to toe w/ a grown man,they are two diff topics!! Duh!
  • Redbird99ky
    Redbird99ky Posts: 305 Member
    NO
  • deadliftfan
    deadliftfan Posts: 66
    I always thought it was acceptable...until the push turned into a punch and a punch turned into a choke.

    It is NEVER ok for someone to put their hands on their partner in anger. Even just to push them. If he didn't want her to touch him, he could have put his arms up and told her not to.

    I hope she addresses this with him quickly and that he doesn't do it again.

    If she didn't want him to touch her, she could have put her arms up and told him not to. Why should there be special privileges for women.

    I don't think there's anyone younger than 40 that wouldn't hit a woman back if hit. That sort of deluded mangina white knighting chivalry crap is dead and gone in this post feminist world.

    Man or woman, don't hit someone because they will hit you back.
  • kimosabe1
    kimosabe1 Posts: 2,467 Member
    OH HELL NO!!!:explode:
  • wjniii
    wjniii Posts: 110 Member
    It's NOT OK, no way, no how, never...
  • samanthawarren
    samanthawarren Posts: 120
    If she was coming at him aggressively then he had the right to push her.

    No. If she was coming at him with a weapon, or he was in fear for his life or health...maybe. If he just pushed her in anger, its assault and battery. She should get away from him.

    So it's not assault if she pushes him?

    Not trying to single you out, personally, but it's ridiculous that a woman get smack a man but if the man pushes her back to get her off, he's the one who gets in trouble.

    my point exactly!


    I am shocked at how many people have this attitude. Especially women. It is probably the reason I see even teens in high school shoving their girlfriends. What is the matter with people. My husband who would never do this always tells my son that he should NEVER put his hands on a girl to hit or even push her and my son is young. Even if the girl hits him. Why? Because they are strong guys and no girl is a match for them. He always says there are other ways a man can handle things.

    Now that being said, I would never put my hands on my hubby in anger either. But what was said was she just approached him, she didn't slap him. She didn't touch him-she approached him. We weren't there so we don't know.

    I really don't know why I read these posts on a fitness sight, but I never cease to be amazed that any woman would think this is ok in any way, shape, or form.

    I had a close associate who used to get really angry and try to hit her husband, not because she was mad at him, but to release tension or something. I don't know, she was crazy. Did he push her or hit her? NEVER, not once. He always managed to either hug her so she couldn't really get hits in or hold her hands and talk her down. All I can say is he is great for her because I don't know too many guys that could handle this. The good news is she has her anger issues under control with his help and he never once shoved her.
  • deadliftfan
    deadliftfan Posts: 66
    If she was coming at him aggressively then he had the right to push her.

    No. If she was coming at him with a weapon, or he was in fear for his life or health...maybe. If he just pushed her in anger, its assault and battery. She should get away from him.

    So it's not assault if she pushes him?

    Not trying to single you out, personally, but it's ridiculous that a woman get smack a man but if the man pushes her back to get her off, he's the one who gets in trouble.

    my point exactly!


    I am shocked at how many people have this attitude. Especially women. It is probably the reason I see even teens in high school shoving their girlfriends. What is the matter with people. My husband who would never do this always tells my son that he should NEVER put his hands on a girl to hit or even push her and my son is little. Even if the girl hits him. Why? Because they are strong guys and no girl is a match for them. He always says there are other ways a man can handle things.

    Now that being said, I would never put my hands on my hubby in anger either. But what was said was she just approached him, she didn't slap him. She didn't touch him-she approached him. We weren't there so we don't know.

    I really don't know why I read these posts on a fitness sight, but I never cease to be amazed that any woman would think this is ok in any way, shape, or form.

    He has every right to push her away if she approached him in an aggressive violent manner. Wouldn't he do the same if a man came towards him that way.

    Most young people are brought up to believe that both genders are equal. It's only the baby boomers that think they should turn the other cheek when hit by a woman.

    Equal lefts come with equal rights princesses.
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