Is it okay her boyfriend pushed her in anger?

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Replies

  • samanthawarren
    samanthawarren Posts: 120

    He has every right to push her away if she approached him in an aggressive violent manner. Wouldn't he do the same if a man came towards him that way.

    Most young people are brought up to believe that both genders are equal. It's only the baby boomers that think they should turn the other cheek when hit by a woman.

    Equal lefts come with equal rights princesses.

    What????? Where did it say she came at him aggressively. What kind of man needs to put their hands on a woman for any reason??? A weak one.

    I don't think any adult should hit any other adult. Why should anyone handle their problems that way. I guess it is all just a part of what is wrong with people today. They have no empathy or concern for one another. Any woman who is shoved by a man who she didn't even touch should get away from the louse. Also if you read the first post it did not say she touched him in any way. Why do you assume she was going to attack him.
  • Shannon2714
    Shannon2714 Posts: 843 Member
    A....No where in the OP did she say that her friend went at him "aggressively"....she just said she walked towards him. None of us know why, but there are many of us that try to approach our SO when we're arguing in an attempt to diffuse the situation.

    B....Trolls turning this into a joke are pathetic. There is nothing wrong with men thinking it is unacceptable to hit women. There is nothing wrong with women believing that if they hit a man, they should get hit back. There's also nothing wrong with those women that believe it is entirely unacceptable for a man to hit a woman even if she hit him first.

    This isn't a conversation that should be taken lightly or made fun of. For those of you here that find this funny, one day you may have daughters that get abused....I hope you don't find it so amusing then.
  • samanthawarren
    samanthawarren Posts: 120
    A....No where in the OP did she say that her friend went at him "aggressively"....she just said she walked towards him. None of us know why, but there are many of us that try to approach our SO when we're arguing in an attempt to diffuse the situation.

    B....Trolls turning this into a joke are pathetic. There is nothing wrong with men thinking it is unacceptable to hit women. There is nothing wrong with women believing that if they hit a man, they should get hit back. There's also nothing wrong with those women that believe it is entirely unacceptable for a man to hit a woman even if she hit him first.

    This isn't a conversation that should be taken lightly or made fun of. For those of you here that find this funny, one day you may have daughters that get abused....I hope you don't find it so amusing then.

    AGREED!!!!!
  • EnchantedEvening
    EnchantedEvening Posts: 671 Member
    If he misinterpreted the way I was coming at him and pushed me out of reflex, then I'd be pissed but give him a pass, especially if he's never been violent before.

    HOWEVER.

    Pushing her after she was already sitting down - pushing her head no less - THAT is completely unforgivable. There's no misunderstanding if she was just sitting there. In that case, he was definitely the aggressor, and that is not okay. I'm worried he'll do that to her again. She needs to reassess this relationship.

    It doesn't matter if it's the woman or the man. A couple should not be pushing each other unless it's in self-defense.

    Also, I think it's crap people are saying a guy shouldn't defend himself. If one of my friends' wives went after them, I'd hope they'd deflect the blows as best they could. It isn't always man on woman violence. There are some crazy women out there, and no man should have to take that just because he's "a man". I'm not saying the OP's friend is crazy (I'm on her side 'cause he pushed her for no reason), but it's stupid to say a man can't defend himself.
  • samanthawarren
    samanthawarren Posts: 120
    I am not saying a guy shouldn't defend himself. In the case I mentioned he didn't let his wife beat the crap out of him. He is much stronger than her so he restrained her from hitting him until she calmed down. I also think it is pretty crazy for her to try to hit him. There is such a thing as wives abusing their husbands, even though it is pretty rare. I do not think a man should put up with that either. Most abused women do not defend themselves. Instead they take little things like this, then they become bigger things, until she ends up in the hospital because she allowed this behavior in the first place.

    No one should put up with their significant other putting their hands on them in anger. Not men and not women. If this is how you handle things maybe you shouldn't be together.
  • shammxo
    shammxo Posts: 1,432 Member
    He had no right to put his hands on her at ALL. A real man would walk away.

    Real man. lol. What is this, 1950? It's equality princess.

    NxmNY.gif

    This video is tooooo much. In all honesty, I would've decked her, too.

    Whether or not this is *okay*, depends on what really happened.

    I guess it really depends on what you mean by her coming at him... Or what you mean by "he pushed her in anger" You prefaced it with, "he has a terrible temper". So this kind of makes it sound like he often responds to her in a violent or angry manner.
    But if she was coming at him in an aggressive way, and he felt threatened, then I guess pushing her away isn't TERRIBLE. In the sense of, "What makes it okay for her to go after him, but he can't react?"
    However, just shoving her for no reason is unacceptable.( And I think this viewpoint also depends on the size difference between them.)

    If I went after a guy, I don't think I'd be outraged if he tried to push me away.
    People need to find better ways to handle things. (Yes, I know this isn't going to happen.)
  • deadliftfan
    deadliftfan Posts: 66
    101019-female-sumo-wrestler-vmed-1a.grid-6x2.jpg

    Manginas will turn the other cheek lol...
  • samanthawarren
    samanthawarren Posts: 120
    Boy I am glad my daughter will never date a looser who thinks it is ok to hit a woman. She has too much sense, and a pretty big dad.
  • Retiredmom72
    Retiredmom72 Posts: 538 Member
    If she was coming at him aggressively then he had the right to push her.

    It is never okay for a male to get physical with a female because she was coming towards him, even aggressively. He didn't!t know what she was actually going to do. The fact that he later pushed her in the head while she was sitting shows that something is not right. Next he will be blaming her for his actions. THIS IS ABUSE. He could have walked away IF he felt threatened.

    If it happened once, it will happen again. Be her good friend and don't allow him to isolate her. Also look for bruises and unexplained accidents/falls.
  • Retiredmom72
    Retiredmom72 Posts: 538 Member
    Too many young people and apparently some bad boys think this behavior is funny and just fine.

    Bottom line--boil some water, make some coffee, and in the words of a wise woman, "Child, that boy looks hungry. Serve him some grits."
  • Steven
    Steven Posts: 593 MFP Moderator
    Folks,

    This has gotten out of hand and I think the OP has had enough opportunity t have her question answered.

    I'm locking this under the following guideline:
    4. Show Respect to All Groups and Individuals

    No derogatory references to sex, gender, weight, body-type, ethnicity, religion, or sexual orientation, or endorsement of violence against any person or group, even if couched in humor, will be permitted. This includes expressing stereotypes about any group or community.

    Steven
    MyFitnessPal Staff
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