Friends List envy?
Replies
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Meh, I already have many incredible friends on my list who I would love to have more time to interact with.
We have had this discussion already...0 -
Oh but one more thing, since I am ragedeleting Steph I do have an opening, so I'll be window shopping here.0
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I ask to be friends who whoever I feel would be supportive. I usually add a message telling them why or where I saw them. Usually youre more bound to get accepted with a message.
Plus, I love having a bunch of supporters in this weight loss thing. Going at it alone is hard.0 -
Fear of rejection.0
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I sent one of the cool kids a FR when I was new because I saw her success story and was really inspired. And she accepted! I was so happy!!
Then she deleted me. I didn't know why...so I sent her a message asking why...
...and she ignored it.
My heart was shattered; my fragile ego was destroyed. I projected back to eighth grade when my "best friend" told me she didn't want to be friends with me anymore because I didn't fit in with the cool kids.
And yet I've built an amazing list of friends here on MFP and no longer feel the sting of her rejection on a daily basis.
:laugh:
People reject me on MFP all the time, but I don't take it personally. If you guys really knew me...well, you'd REALLY run in the other direction!
ETA: I add anyone that sends a message with the request, and I request people that I seem to have many friends in common with.
I could have written this exact same thing, except she sent me the request, then deleted me and then ignored me when I PMd her. No hard feelings against that person though. Sometimes people don't click.
Honestly, I have an amazing group of friends. There are lots more I'd like to be friends with but I'm afraid of my list getting unmanageable. Rejection doesn't bother me.0 -
Rnt I enough for you? :huh:
I laugh at this, typical "I saw 1 of ur posts and now I have to hate" Typical...0 -
Edit: weird repeat post; cred blown. Typical.0
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I FR anyone who catches my fancy. I write a well thought out message that both gives examples of compatibility and expresses my.immense level of awesomcity while simultaneously showing my.ridiculousness and deep-seeded crazy.
If they deny me then I know its simply because they aren't ready for this jelly (jalapeno raspberry to be exact).
This is why we are friends!!0 -
I sent one of the cool kids a FR when I was new because I saw her success story and was really inspired. And she accepted! I was so happy!!
Then she deleted me. I didn't know why...so I sent her a message asking why...
...and she ignored it.
My heart was shattered; my fragile ego was destroyed. I projected back to eighth grade when my "best friend" told me she didn't want to be friends with me anymore because I didn't fit in with the cool kids.
And yet I've built an amazing list of friends here on MFP and no longer feel the sting of her rejection on a daily basis.
:laugh:
People reject me on MFP all the time, but I don't take it personally. If you guys really knew me...well, you'd REALLY run in the other direction!
ETA: I add anyone that sends a message with the request, and I request people that I seem to have many friends in common with.
But we're still friends0 -
I don't send out many FRs. Quite honestly, it's because I was bullied in middle and high school by a gal who would manipulate me and spread lies so other people would hate me. A couple of my siblings would constantly insult me and mock anything I said, from my earliest memories until maybe five years ago, when 800km between us kind of prevented it. I have a hard time accepting that people genuinely want to be my friend. I'm very outgoing but I tend to be skittish when it comes to close friendships.
It's really pitiful saying it out loud like that, but there it is. But even though um feeling really glum right now, thinking about it, one thing I'm NOT going to do is binge on all sorts of random snacks. So there's that.
OMG, you had MY childhood/teenagerhood!
I had one "friend" who told the entire (small) town we lived in that I had slept with an entire Boy Scout troop*...What was worse, was that some people believed her!
*These kids were 12, 13, and 14, and I was 16 and I was friends with a couple of them because I was dating the 25-year-old Scoutmaster, who might as well have been 13 and the most we ever did was hold hands and have closed mouth good-night kisses. Seriously, they might as well have spread gossip that I'd been anally probed by aliens from Pluto.
Edited to add: It's funny now, but it was really hurtful then. I often wonder what happened to those gossipy people, and if they ever grew out of it, or turned into sour old people.0 -
Rnt I enough for you? :huh:
I laugh at this, typical "I saw every 1 of ur posts and now I have to hate" Typical...
hmmmm0 -
Here is the thing guys... If you aren't what the person wants it is OK.
I am sure I annoy my fair share of people, and if that is the case, isnt it better for me NOT to be on their lists?
I want to be ME, not someone's version of what they think I should be.
For every person who does not want to add you there are many who do, and will appreciate you for who you are and what you bring to the table.
so try not to be too hurt, there are many amazing people here.
:flowerforyou:
PS If I decline anyone, it is mostly because my list has gotten big, and it is hard to give attention to my friends...it isnt personal.0 -
Oh but one more thing, since I am ragedeleting Steph I do have an opening, so I'll be window shopping here.
NOOOO!!! Come back to me! You can look at my diary and judge me all you want!0 -
It's ok...just send me the request already! I don't bite! :laugh:0
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To be honest, I just don’t want to be thought of as a "creeper". I am only interested in meeting people who are on the same journey as myself and its very difficult to determine who is who by reading a simple profile. I have a lot to learn after being out of the gym while raising kids and doing my best to get caught up.0
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I don't often send FRs as I have bad judgement, people who send FRs to me obviously have much better judgement ;D0
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Rnt I enough for you? :huh:
I laugh at this, typical "I saw 1 of ur posts and now I have to hate" Typical...
lolwut?
ONE?
hahaha
NO.0 -
Nah. I've added people I thought were interesting before and then we just never interacted. I have a pretty kick *kitten* FL so I don't sweat it :drinker:0
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Idk about everyone else but I am pretty selfish when it comes to my friends. I don't like to share em! Mine mine mine, lol :laugh:0
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Rnt I enough for you? :huh:
I laugh at this, typical "I saw 1 of ur posts and now I have to hate" Typical...
I've seen multiple posts, girlfriend. It didn't help. :flowerforyou:0 -
Huh....I just don't like anyone.
Careful. You're dangerously close to violating my intellectual property rights.0 -
Rnt I enough for you? :huh:
I laugh at this, typical "I saw 1 of ur posts and now I have to hate" Typical...
lolwut?
ONE?
hahaha
NO.
Would you like to elaborate? You seem to be following me around, finding something to "rag post" about.0 -
To be honest, I just don’t want to be thought of as a "creeper". I am only interested in meeting people who are on the same journey as myself and its very difficult to determine who is who by reading a simple profile. I have a lot to learn after being out of the gym while raising kids and doing my best to get caught up.
i admit i'm guilty of that worry too. i mean... i'm in my mid-40's, so it just feels weird to send a FR to a woman in her mid-20's. i always picture them thinking i'm some sort of creepy perv just for sending the FR.
there are some creepy pervs on here for sure, i just don't happen to be one of them. i blame my upbringing.:frown:0 -
Huh....I just don't like anyone.
Careful. You're dangerously close to violating my intellectual property rights.
If I repeat the "I was so excited when I got your FR" story that I told Rachel, will it help?0 -
To be honest, I just don’t want to be thought of as a "creeper". I am only interested in meeting people who are on the same journey as myself and its very difficult to determine who is who by reading a simple profile. I have a lot to learn after being out of the gym while raising kids and doing my best to get caught up.
i admit i'm guilty of that worry too. i mean... i'm in my mid-40's, so it just feels weird to send a FR to a woman in her mid-20's. i always picture them thinking i'm some sort of creepy perv just for sending the FR.
there are some creepy pervs on here for sure, i just don't happen to be one of them. i blame my upbringing.:frown:
Amen brother0 -
Dawwww, you have to work much harder to shake me.Oh but one more thing, since I am ragedeleting Steph I do have an opening, so I'll be window shopping here.
NOOOO!!! Come back to me! You can look at my diary and judge me all you want!0 -
I don't send requests out very often. I usually just wait to see if people send one to me, and I'm happy to accept. I don't know, I guess I just don't have a very good on-the-internet-radar for whether people would want to be friends or not. But, additionally I would always rather someone reject my request than to accept it, if they didn't really want to.0
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I do mutual underwear exchanges. So those who are on my friends list exchanged underwear with me and proved themselves worthy.
Damn, that's where I went wrong.
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Huh....I just don't like anyone.
Careful. You're dangerously close to violating my intellectual property rights.
If I repeat the "I was so excited when I got your FR" story that I told Rachel, will it help?
I KNEW IT! :grumble: Traitor.0 -
Yes. I notoriously do not send out FR rarely; I talk to people sometimes like we're already friends, PM, etc., but I just assume everyone hates me until proven otherwise.
But there are definitely people (INCLUDING YOU WINNER) who I would like to be friends with.0
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