'No, I don't date BIG girls'
Replies
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You didn't really give the backstory behind someone using this line, or the context in which is was used, but just out of curiosity, do YOU routinely date someone you aren't at all attracted to?
If this was said TO you when you asked a guy out, then I agree, its really rude and unnecessary, but as many have said...we all have our types and preferences, so you really can't expect people to just "get over it" :ohwell:0 -
"Big" girls do it best. It's truly their loss and they don't know what they're missing. I bet after an hour with me they'd "date" "big" girls
always one !!!!!
and you shot yourself in the foot already be them big or thin.....!
Obviously not everyone reading this thread isn't "big", so you are saying that because a gal is "big" they are better than one that is not. I am not big, never have been, but I sure the hell would never go around a thread on MFP saying anything like "thin girls" do X better. F that. The whole point of the original posters statement was that it was rude the way the man said it. Now you are going there.
I was just trying to lighten the mood, and speak up for my fellow "big" girls. And I personally don't even think him saying that he didn't like "big" girls was rude. But you might be considered a "big" girl in some man's eye, as everyone has a different definition of BIG.0 -
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This is all subjective, and if you care so much about 1 person's opinion, you're living your life by other people's rules.
Never do that, it never ends well.0 -
Honestly after reading this I think a lot of people really underestimate physical attractiveness, I get that there is more to a relationship then just how attracted you are to someone. There has to be more there but it's that initial spark which leads to first date and then you see what goes from there. I've never been some place looked across the room and thought damn girl's personality is banging. Also with that being said I feel like there is some sort of entitlement that people deserve a chance, well maybe so but thinking guys are jerks because they aren't into big girls is wrong too, rejecting someone is never going to be easy or nice. No one likes hearing no especially if you're really attracted to someone it sucks but people have their preferences and maybe they could keep them to themselves and not say they don't like bigger girls or taller girls blondes brunettes whatever the case. I mean if someone isn't into you they aren't just move on and realize there are a lot more people out there never understood well people dwell on the ones they can't have when they should be looking for the one that truly wants them0
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I just think people should be considerate when they voice their opinion because you never know how it will be perceived. This is the primary reason why I don't approach men, they have to approach me because if someone told me that it would really bother me. Not because I care about their opinion, but because that's just not something I would want to hear.0
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I think everybody has preferences and deal breakers, period.
Everyone is entitled to their preferences. I'm not going to deny that to a person, but there's still no reason to be an a-hole about it.
True, but it sure does make it easier to weed out the asssholes when they show their true colors. And if they are not being an *kitten* about it, than it goes back to simple preferences.
^ ^ ^ THIS.
Carrying a bit of extra weight, for all its down sides, has served me as an excellent filter.
Honestly, if a guy looked at me and said "I don't date BIG girls," I'd count myself lucky that I nipped that dud in the bud.0 -
Meat is for a man, bone is for the dog
Nuff said
now lets all go rock it :happy: 0 -
"Big" girls do it best. It's truly their loss and they don't know what they're missing. I bet after an hour with me they'd "date" "big" girlsalways one !!!!!
and you shot yourself in the foot already be them big or thin.....!
Obviously not everyone reading this thread isn't "big", so you are saying that because a gal is "big" they are better than one that is not. I am not big, never have been, but I sure the hell would never go around a thread on MFP saying anything like "thin girls" do X better. F that. The whole point of the original posters statement was that it was rude the way the man said it. Now you are going there.
I was just trying to lighten the mood, and speak up for my fellow "big" girls. And I personally don't even think him saying that he didn't like "big" girls was rude. But you might be considered a "big" girl in some man's eye, as everyone has a different definition of BIG.
i was "just taking the p "
cant be serious on here even if i try as its a bit like that film where a couple were in white coats and the rest behind caged windows something to do with a cuckoo !!!!
there you go, i ve gone and done it again..!0 -
That is an incredibly nasty saying.Meat is for a man, bone is for the man.0 -
I think everybody has preferences and deal breakers, period.
Everyone is entitled to their preferences. I'm not going to deny that to a person, but there's still no reason to be an a-hole about it.
Your interpretation of what someone says sounds like you have demons within...settle those and learn my favorite saying...FUK IT.....life is too grand to live with negativity.0 -
For those who would say that to me, my sarcastic & whitty side would retort with, "if you think I'm too BIG for you, you don't have the equipment for the job anyway." People are entitled to their preferences but they dont need to be mean or rude about their expression of it.0
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Who really says that nowadays?
It really bothers me when some, and I repeat, some guys think 'big girls' are nasty, stinky, lazy, and whatever other degrading adjective comes to mind. Seriously, those kind of guys need to get over that thought because it makes them look like a cocky, dumb, *kitten*.
What are your feelings about that?
I wont date them because I don't find them attractive. A little ironic how you complain about people making assumptions but then pretty much do the same to a another group.0 -
Honestly after reading this I think a lot of people really underestimate physical attractiveness, I get that there is more to a relationship then just how attracted you are to someone. There has to be more there but it's that initial spark which leads to first date and then you see what goes from there. I've never been some place looked across the room and thought damn girl's personality is banging. Also with that being said I feel like there is some sort of entitlement that people deserve a chance, well maybe so but thinking guys are jerks because they aren't into big girls is wrong too, rejecting someone is never going to be easy or nice. No one likes hearing no especially if you're really attracted to someone it sucks but people have their preferences and maybe they could keep them to themselves and not say they don't like bigger girls or taller girls blondes brunettes whatever the case. I mean if someone isn't into you they aren't just move on and realize there are a lot more people out there never understood well people dwell on the ones they can't have when they should be looking for the one that truly wants them
this is the best thing that could be said in response to this post 0 -
I think people have a right to preferences regarding who they date.
Exactly. My *kitten* husband would NOT date an overweight girl (not the way he would put it), a white girl (he is white), or a lazy girl. So he ended up with me. Sheesh, lucky me, huh? I deal with this *kitten* everyday. SMH.0 -
Meat is for a man, bone is for the dog
Nuff said now lets all go rock it :happy:
Ah, this one again. Cool. So it's not ok to fat shame, but totally ok to skinny shame? Got it.
Anyway, I don't date "big" guys, I just don't find big dudes (be that overweight or huge and muscley) attractive, so I guess I'm a douche, too.0 -
I did get this one a few times and it bothered me, but then I realized that there are guys out there who are cute, sweet, and MATURE who is ok with a little meat on the bones. Don't worry hun...all you need to do is find the guy who accepts you the way you are 0
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I used to say that I wasn't attracted to "big" guys. I preferred athletic, trim, tall guys. Then I met my husband.. he is 6'2" and at his thinnest weighed 230 lbs. He is muscular but chunky too. I am crazy attracted to him and think he is the hottest thing since sliced bread. Me, I was always the "fat" friend, even when I wasn't fat. I just happened to hang out with girls who were skinnier than me. It sucks to have a crush on a guy and him ask you all about your friends. That being said, I believe everyone has their preferences and they have that right but there is no need to be rude about it at all. I dated a guy who I REALLY liked. I had it so bad for him. We were together almost a year when he told me that I should lose weight. I was a size 12 and totally athletic, swimming, softball, volleyball, etc. Sure, I was soft on the edges but not obese by any means. He sure didn't mind those soft edges at "other" times. LOL! :blushing: Anyway, I wish he had just said it up front, when we met, cause I would have just passed on the whole relationship.0
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The way I see it, rejection sucks and we've all experienced it whether it was based on physical attraction or not. I've been both thin and heavy and even at my thinnest and when I was most confident and comfortable with myself there were still guys that didn't find me attractive. I didn't dwell on it. I know that I too have met guys that I just wasn't into. I once met a really attractive guy for dinner and we had NOTHING in common. I have also met guys that I didn't have an initial attraction to but after spending time with them I developed an attraction.
The point is we all have our likes and dislikes and we all have different things we find attractive. Not EVERYONE is going to find you attractive nor are you going to be attracted to EVERYONE. Do I think it necessary or tactful to insult someone in turning them down? No, but seriously just let it go and move on. You WILL find someone with whom you have a mutual attraction and life will be all good so don't waste your time on the others
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Meat is for a man, bone is for the dog
Nuff said now lets all go rock it :happy:
This saying really gets on my nerves. What is meat? It is muscle. NOT FAT. Funny how those who are larger, and not due to muscle, like to quote this like it somehow applies to them because they are larger.
Not saying that is what you are doing, I didn't look at your pics. But I see this from fat people all the time. Hell, I love meat. But I trim the fat off my steaks, and still give the bone to the dog.0 -
I think if you are basing any major part of your mate selection on something as fleeting as physical attraction you are already dooming yourself to an unhappy relationship. Physical attraction should be a nice to have not a deal breaker.
But when you first meet someone, first impression, all you have to go on is physical attraction.
Loving someone's personality or charm is great--- but you don't actually see any of that until you get to know them. And if you're not physically attracted to them, you're not going to bother going that far.
For the record, I've never been told "Oh, I don't date big guys," but I've dated girls who've told me they don't date skinny guys. 0 -
Limiting your choices to a preference for a certain shell seems sad to me.
If I said I don't date girls, I'd have missed out on Tiffany and Fari. Both girls rocked my world and left a lasting impression.
If I said I don't date black people, I'd have missed out on Will. While the relationship was bad, it was a life lesson that I needed at the time, and I don't regret a minute of it.
If I said I don't date fat people, I would have missed out on the greatest love I have ever known. My husband was morbidly obese when we met, and is even bigger now. (I am on MFP because I allowed his habits to become my habits, but I'm getting back in shape!) And I love every single soft, incredible, sexy inch of him. Yes, I want him to lose weight for health reasons, but I love him and am attracted to him because of who he is.
A shell is not a person. It's just the house they inherited. L'amore è cieco.
she's right people, a shell is not a person. you cant talk to a shell. a shell wont be there for you in the hard times. but you can hold it up to your ear and it sounds like the sea. I know right!?!
I'm not sticking "that" into a shell. I step on the damn things too often on the beach and they're a bit sharp.0 -
I still can't believe that people like this exist. Of all my years of being 'bigger' I've never had someone blatantly tell me, "I won't date you because you're fat" or "I'm not attracted to big girls." I understand that everyone has different tastes in what they're attracted to, because I'm the same way. I won't date someone unless I'm physically attracted to them. I don't see that as being mean, but rather it's science working in my brain. I would never tell someone they were fat, ugly, etc., though.0
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Meat is for a man, bone is for the dog
Nuff said now lets all go rock it :happy:
Ah, this one again. Cool. So it's not ok to fat shame, but totally ok to skinny shame? Got it.
Anyway, I don't date "big" guys, I just don't find big dudes (be that overweight or huge and muscley) attractive, so I guess I'm a douche, too.
I've got with some fat dudes before. I was very much into the "funny fat guy" deal. Then I met my ripped husband and never looked back. LOL Ironically, I ended up with the man with a serious persona and extremely dry humor. His jokes are hard to catch... I've had the BEST of both worlds.
ETA: LOL missed the part in the parenthesis! Ooops!0 -
Who really says that nowadays?
It really bothers me when some, and I repeat, some guys think 'big girls' are nasty, stinky, lazy, and whatever other degrading adjective comes to mind. Seriously, those kind of guys need to get over that thought because it makes them look like a cocky, dumb, *kitten*.
What are your feelings about that?
It's a matter of preference. Some folks dont' date others on the basis of other factors (race, height, political beliefs, etc). I don't know that it makes them "cocky dumb *kitten*" however. It's just a matter of preference.0 -
Who really says that nowadays?
It really bothers me when some, and I repeat, some guys think 'big girls' are nasty, stinky, lazy, and whatever other degrading adjective comes to mind. Seriously, those kind of guys need to get over that thought because it makes them look like a cocky, dumb, *kitten*.
What are your feelings about that?
Some guys just aren't attracted to that body type. Doesn't necessarily mean they think they are "stinky, lazy, sloppy" or whatever. I happen to prefer bigger white men, and I'm not attracted to Latinos. Doesn't mean there in anything wrong with skinny guys, or Mexicans. Just not my cup of tea.
People shouldn't jump on others just for being tactfully honest.
And for those claiming that physical attraction isn't everything and you shouldn't base relationships off them, I totally agree. But there has to be SOMETHING there. Relationships and marriage are hard enough without having attraction issues from the beginning. Just my two cents.0 -
People are entitled to their preferences but they dont need to be mean or rude about their expression of it.
^^^ this
After divorcing years ago, I dabbled in online dating. I had a few who outright asked for my weight and then proclaimed, "I don't date women that weigh more than me". I get it's there preference, as I do not date SMOKERS(even though I'm an ex smoker). Sure, it stung that I wasn't even considered because of the weight.
With that said, I see it like this. My appearance is not static and subject to change over time..... if they weren't interested in my other assets up front, then they wouldn't have appreciated me later... EVEN IF they found me attractive now....so there was no real loss there.0 -
Meat is for a man, bone is for the dog
Nuff said now lets all go rock it :happy:
:huh:0 -
Hey, my nerd is handsome. 0 -
Meat is for a man, bone is for the dog
Nuff said now lets all go rock it :happy:
wow, now THAT was the winning response. :flowerforyou:0
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