I DO NOT WANT my cake and I DO NOT WANT to eat it too...

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  • rosemaryhon
    rosemaryhon Posts: 507 Member
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    Not even chocolate peanut butter cream cake coated in ganache and graham crumbs? :flowerforyou:

    kwTNEeN.jpg?1


    I would NOT refuse this ^^ ;)

    I would. It's nothing personal, I just don't like peanut butter cakes.

    Yup, I totally get your point. A few posts back I stated I would not eat a slice of coconut cake cause that is just yukky *to me*.

    And that's why it doesn't make sense to me to read others say "just eat it" ~ even if we really don't like/want it? That makes no sense to me. IME saying "no thanks" is perfectly okay.
  • marvybells
    marvybells Posts: 1,984 Member
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    Not even chocolate peanut butter cream cake coated in ganache and graham crumbs? :flowerforyou:

    kwTNEeN.jpg?1


    I would NOT refuse this ^^ ;)

    OMG that looks divine. Did i say i don't really like cake in my last post? i stand corrected....
  • Dark_Roast
    Dark_Roast Posts: 17,689 Member
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    Not even chocolate peanut butter cream cake coated in ganache and graham crumbs? :flowerforyou:

    kwTNEeN.jpg?1

    WANT!
  • kathyrazz
    kathyrazz Posts: 52 Member
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    I'd enthusiastically grab the first slice of cake, take one teeny bite and say I loved it, then walk away with my plate and leave it somewhere.

    To the person who posted early in the thread that this is an anorexia-in-the-making strategy? Yeesh!! You got your tricks, baby...I got mine!!
  • rosemaryhon
    rosemaryhon Posts: 507 Member
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    Not even chocolate peanut butter cream cake coated in ganache and graham crumbs? :flowerforyou:

    kwTNEeN.jpg?1


    I would NOT refuse this ^^ ;)

    OMG that looks divine. Did i say i don't really like cake in my last post? i stand corrected....

    I'm with you, I'm not a big dessert eater but this ^ one looks divine indeed and I'd definitely enjoy ;)
  • PomegranatePriestess
    PomegranatePriestess Posts: 2,455 Member
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    Work it in to your macros for the day. It -is- rude to refuse, since it is -your- birthday and she bought if for -you-.

    When my birthday rolls around I plan on asking for cupcakes, that way i can limit myself to one, and already have it worked in to my calories/fats for the day. It just takes a little planning.

    You know what's rude? Getting someone something they don't want for their birthday.

    If you're interested in celebrating a person's birthday, find out what it is that person wants to eat. Not what YOU want to eat. That's called a Homer Gift where I come from.

    As for the people worried about who is going to trash talk her after the fact, it sounds like that's going to happen either way. At least if she says something beforehand and the sister actually cares, she can eat what she wants instead of what everyone else wants to eat.
  • rosemaryhon
    rosemaryhon Posts: 507 Member
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    I'd enthusiastically grab the first slice of cake, take one teeny bite and say I loved it, then walk away with my plate and leave it somewhere.

    To the person who posted early in the thread that this is an anorexia-in-the-making strategy? Yeesh!! You got your tricks, baby...I got mine!!

    This ^ is probably how I'd handle it too.
  • Ready2Rock206
    Ready2Rock206 Posts: 9,488 Member
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    I'd a) call her before hand and b) refrain from telling her you don't want her toxic poison store bought cake, maybe there's a more polite way you could find to say it..
  • pastryari
    pastryari Posts: 8,646 Member
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    Not even chocolate peanut butter cream cake coated in ganache and graham crumbs? :flowerforyou:

    kwTNEeN.jpg?1


    I would NOT refuse this ^^ ;)
    Personally, I think it's rude to post this picture when most of us will not get to have a slice today.

    Perfect! Gotta keep up my MFP bully reputation. :wink:
  • kimmymayhall
    kimmymayhall Posts: 419 Member
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    If them talking about her not taking the piece of cake, it was a pretty poor party.

    Someone always drinks to much and makes an eijit of themselves, so she is pretty safe.
    Yeah, sounds like there should definitely be peen at this party.
  • agdyl
    agdyl Posts: 246 Member
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    Work it in to your macros for the day. It -is- rude to refuse, since it is -your- birthday and she bought if for -you-.

    When my birthday rolls around I plan on asking for cupcakes, that way i can limit myself to one, and already have it worked in to my calories/fats for the day. It just takes a little planning.

    You know what's rude? Getting someone something they don't want for their birthday.

    If you're interested in celebrating a person's birthday, find out what it is that person wants to eat. Not what YOU want to eat. That's called a Homer Gift where I come from.

    As for the people worried about who is going to trash talk her after the fact, it sounds like that's going to happen either way. At least if she says something beforehand and the sister actually cares, she can eat what she wants instead of what everyone else wants to eat.

    Amen. There's not knowing and then there is actively deciding to buy someone a "gift" that you know they will not like at all.

    If the person doesn't know, they don't know. If you know this is coming in advance, point out that you're not eating sugar or cake and say you don't mind if others have it, but you'd prefer some fruit or something instead to celebrate with. That should not be a big deal. And if people already know you well, they probably know you're not eating sugar.

    If this is a big deal to someone, I'd let them make all the fuss they want but I'm not eating something I don't want to eat just to make someone happy. Especially over a store bought cake. I mean if you're talking your grandmother baked you something she remembered as your favorite, maybe I'd have a bite, if I'm not allergic. Otherwise? Feel free to talk about how rude I am. I don't care.

    I sit at office parties every couple weeks and watch everyone eat cake while I drink a glass of water. When my birthday comes around, either they will buy something healthy to eat or I'll just watch them eat the cake they bought for me, and I'm fine with it either way.
  • likitisplit
    likitisplit Posts: 9,420 Member
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    Not even chocolate peanut butter cream cake coated in ganache and graham crumbs? :flowerforyou:

    kwTNEeN.jpg?1


    I would NOT refuse this ^^ ;)
    Personally, I think it's rude to post this picture when most of us will not get to have a slice today.

    I would turn this down with a "That looks fabulous, but it really is too rich for me."
  • Gabrielm80
    Gabrielm80 Posts: 1,458 Member
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    One piece of cake is not going to kill you, nor cause you to crash off what every crazy rail you are on into a hopless addiction where you end up behind baskin robins suckin some guys d!ck to get your next ice cream cone. you can have one small piece - take a regular pice cut it in half and eat it, saves you from hurting anyones feelings.

    There is no such thing as a sugar addiction, there is lack of willpower towards sugar, there is a fondness toward sugar but no addiction.
    Not true, sugar can stimulate the same pleasure seeking nerves in the brain, anything that does that can become addictive. The same processes in the brain with drugs can happen with fatty sugary foods. It is hard wired in our dna so we want to seek calorie rich food. Not our body's fault we have such an abundance available at all times. It is what gave hunter and gathers ancestors the will to find the best juicest fruit. Any one who is prone to alcoholism is just as much in danger to food addiction. To say otherwise is a lack of knowledge of brain chemistry.

    Not according to my therapist. I went in and said I had a food addiction and was told straight out that it is not an addiction. I was an alcoholic. I have been sober just over 1 year, I was positive I was addicted to food as well - I love food. My love of food is not an addiction. It has never been an addiction, it was a complete excuse. I did not go into the DT's when I cut my food back, I still enjoy my sugar and all the food I always did - I cannot however and probably will not ever enjoy my favorite drinks ever again or I will continue the downward spiral that was my life with alcohol.

    I can have 1 piece of cake and not end up spiraling out of control, and trust me I love cake and pie.

    I have never and I doubt I will ever meet someone who has sucked a d!ck in a dirty alley so they can get their next piece of cake/pie/ blah blah blah.

    To say food is an addiction is an excuse, does it give you a good feeling perhaps but that is not due to the hard wiring of your brain that is due to you allowing yourself to suppress your actual feelings with food. Food is not meant to replace emotional connections. My therapist has seen many people who say "I am a food addict" when in reality they like to use that as an excuse.

    Can you abstain from eating sugars? if you want i don't care but to say you are addicted to it is completely 100% absurd and I will stand by my food additction is a lack of willpower.

    Ok so there is a study that says sugar isnt addictive. It summarizes with in it it depends on the definition of addiction. The study claims that unless subject go through painful physical withdraws it is not addictive on the level that stopping doesn't create the deterants of pain, but goes and says that all test mice showed the same addictive behavior to the sugar that they would a drug addiction. All that but the pain. Addiction can come in many forms. Using addiction as a reason you can't stop is an excuse, but saying you would rather not have cake because of that is understandable. I myself eat sugary foods but would never shame someone who doesn't want to eat cake. If that is their line in the sand so be it. Sugar can in fact create addictive desires for the stuff. and for some they have set limits. Will the cake ruin her life, no. Could it create unwanted stress do to an unwanted desire for fatty sugary foods maybe. I would never shun someone for wanting to cut down their sugar intake. Which is what some here are doing. Eat sugar don't eat sugar who cares, but don't get so clinical with the world addiction that you shame people dealing with problems on it. That said a different study showed how we become have addiction to non chemical stimuli. Be it Tv, cleaning, money, and so on. Anything the helps to stimulate pleasure nerves in the brain can over work your endorphins in the brain. If your brain is constantly trigger by the same event. If dependent on the event lack of can create a lack of endorphins and create physical symptoms caused by depression. That depression can mimic the same withdraws we could expect a tabacco user to have. My not selling your self for smack kind, but the flipping over couch seats for loose change to buy cigerettes kind. Addiction isn't one type and one severity. It can come in many forms. Nothing is all bad but for some people some things are unwanted triggers. Be fair to the OP, or any one thinks they have a refined sugar addiction. I might not be like heroine but it can be that elephant in the room and should be respected as such
  • likitisplit
    likitisplit Posts: 9,420 Member
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    I'd enthusiastically grab the first slice of cake, take one teeny bite and say I loved it, then walk away with my plate and leave it somewhere.

    To the person who posted early in the thread that this is an anorexia-in-the-making strategy? Yeesh!! You got your tricks, baby...I got mine!!

    This ^ is probably how I'd handle it too.

    It was more the playing with it and pretending to eat it.

    I don't necessarily think I need to clean my plate. I might eat half a cupcake if that's what I feel like doing. I don't, however, pretend to eat it. I would also suggest a cake alternative so that the issue didn't even come up.
  • MyChocolateDiet
    MyChocolateDiet Posts: 22,281 Member
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    http://www.myfitnesspal.com/food/calories/betty-crocker-super-moist-devils-food-cake-mix-prepared-82677598

    Change to a whole package....that's 3496 calories.

    Common knowledge is that it takes 3500 calories to gain a pound.

    You could eat a whole f'ing Betty Croker Devils Food Cake and THAT would be enough to gain a pound this week.

    ...
    ...
    ...
    ...

    Dayum, that sounds like it would be worth a pound.

    OH! Now I know what happened to my ticker this week. I ate too much of the vanilla bottom of that cake I showed you all. The bottom alone was an entire package of vanilla betty crocker cake . For some reason since I have chocolate daily that vanilla was like so appealing to me and I ate a lot. Everyone else went for the chocolate. See guys, it's all about the denial of the food that makes it so tempting. Chocolate everyday, no big deal. Vanilla cake hardly ever....scarf city.
  • MyChocolateDiet
    MyChocolateDiet Posts: 22,281 Member
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    I'd enthusiastically grab the first slice of cake, take one teeny bite and say I loved it, then walk away with my plate and leave it somewhere.

    To the person who posted early in the thread that this is an anorexia-in-the-making strategy? Yeesh!! You got your tricks, baby...I got mine!!

    This ^ is probably how I'd handle it too.

    It was more the playing with it and pretending to eat it.

    I don't necessarily think I need to clean my plate. I might eat half a cupcake if that's what I feel like doing. I don't, however, pretend to eat it. I would also suggest a cake alternative so that the issue didn't even come up.

    Like ice cream? Cause to me birthdays are always cake and ice cream.
  • Jonesingmucho
    Jonesingmucho Posts: 4,902 Member
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    I will be hiding cake all over the house at the next party I go to... the coffee table, the bathroom, the basement, the back patio, the garage, random closets, a couple of drawers, and under the bed in the Master Bedroom. I will amuse myself by making each piece hidden a covert ops mission. I'm sure I will hear the Mission Impossible soundtrack playing in my head while I sneak around.

    For you OP, I suggest more research. Please try these suggestions and let us know which works best.

    1) Eat a small piece of cake even though you don't want to and may die. Record the weight gain.
    2) Refuse to eat cake. Tell everyone that you are healthy, and cake is the devil.
    3) Call SIL and explain. Offer to bring a fruit salad. (OPTION: Bring whipped cream to show off your progress since last year in a whipped cream bikini they can dip their fruit in.)

    Cheers!
  • Fullsterkur_woman
    Fullsterkur_woman Posts: 2,712 Member
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    So... I'm confused. If there's no such thing as sugar addiction and it's just a lack of willpower, why are you all berating the OP for attempting to exercise willpower by not doing something that (possibly the case here, not sure) she knows will make her lose control? :huh:

    Perhaps you would tell somebody who is a former cutter that they ought to be able to cut themselves *just once* and that if they can't stop there then they're a freakin' loser? Is that about the size of it? Because that's crazypants. :noway:
  • obrientp
    obrientp Posts: 546 Member
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    I really want cake now. Can I have it?
  • nyrina4life
    nyrina4life Posts: 196 Member
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    There are loads of alternatives out there. Call your sister-in-law and explain to her why you do not wish to eat cake. If she still brings it, then it's more for the others who associate 'cake' with birthdays.

    Honestly, you could cut a watermelon to look like a cake, and use fresh berries to make a sauce, using their own natural sugars over the watermelon. You could do whatever you like or make these suggestions.

    Eat cake, or do not. That's your choice.