Holy sexism, batman!
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Replies
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Not at all. One is a behavior rooted in sexism, the other in gay-bashing. Although if you want to deconstruct the anti-gay phenomenon and point out that it is really rooted in sexism too, I'm willing to entertain that discussion.
I think you're reading a lot of stuff in that wasn't there. Nobody said the catcallers wanted to rape someone or that the OP was almost raped. All we're saying is that that is an attitude, behavior, or condition that perpetuates stereotypes based on gender. If the OP had been male, that would not have happened. (Though then there is the possibility of someone being harassed because they "appeared to be gay" or whatever).I don't think harassment is funny. but I do think that people saying someone wanted to rape someone cuz they were "catcalling" or looked at them when they walked by is pretty damn funny.
I understand that women have a reason to be cautious, and they should be cautious. But to call someone sexist cuz they hit on you or tell people after the fact that you were almost raped because someone looked at you is completely insane.
lol
Contradictory Statement
Okay,
"If the OP had been male, that would not have happened." <- So you know for a fact that if the OP was a male it wouldnt have happened? No, you really cant say you do. If so, please tell me what the next Powerball numbers are going to be so I can win M'kay?
Also if you REALLY believed beyond a shadow of a doubt that the OP would never have been harassed if they were a male why would you feel the need to say "Though then there is the possibility of someone being harassed because they "appeared to be gay" or whatever" ??
Because its possible it might happen....just not with this particular OP right? Someone else, at a different place in a different time? Definitely! Maybe the OP lives in some sort of sexism vortex that makes it impossible for this to happen?0 -
It doesn't contribute to rape culture. It is symptomatic of rape culture. When you do that, you are in effect saying that her worth to you as a human being is based solely on her sex appeal. If I were you, I would really keep that sort of revelation to myself while I worked on it in therapy. If, in fact, you valued her for something else, you would express your interest in a different fashion.
If you think catcalling is hitting on someone, then I invite you to re-evaluate the statement about there not being a rape culture.Catcalling is hitting on someone, but hitting on someone doesn't mean catcalling.
You see what I did there? There are different ways to hit on someone. Catcalling is one of them, even though it is rude.
Please go with your poverty arguments lol
Ok so I whistle at a girl on the street or say "hey sexy what's up?"
How does that contribute to "rape culture"?
You have no argument left so when you get beat on one topic you switch to another, which you proceed to get wrecked on as well0 -
Because she is not walking down the street so that you can look at her. When it's part of culture that it's okay to do that, it sends the message to both men and women that women are here primarily for men's pleasure. And that contributes to rape culture.
If you think catcalling is hitting on someone, then I invite you to re-evaluate the statement about there not being a rape culture.Catcalling is hitting on someone, but hitting on someone doesn't mean catcalling.
You see what I did there? There are different ways to hit on someone. Catcalling is one of them, even though it is rude.
Please go with your poverty arguments lol
Ok so I whistle at a girl on the street or say "hey sexy what's up?"
How does that contribute to "rape culture"?
You have no argument left so when you get beat on one topic you switch to another, which you proceed to get wrecked on as well
I'm sorry I was unaware that females were some all mighty being that I have to avert my eyes from when I see them. As I said before, "rape culture" is the stupidest saying. No one is teaching that rape is ok. Everyone knows it's wrong. You could take anything and say "this promotes rape culture" just because you don't like it.
"My cashier smiled at me today. I'm not here for his pleasure. He needs to avert his eyes and stop promoting rape culture."0 -
So, we're talking about this person being harassed because of sexism. I mentioned the possibility because I was trying not to minimize the experience of men who have been harassed because of prejudice against gays (whether the harasser or harassee was in fact gay is immaterial). It's called having an inclusive discussion that doesn't alienate other marginalized groups.Okay,
"If the OP had been male, that would not have happened." <- So you know for a fact that if the OP was a male it wouldnt have happened? No, you really cant say you do. If so, please tell me what the next Powerball numbers are going to be so I can win M'kay?
Also if you REALLY believed beyond a shadow of a doubt that the OP would never have been harassed if they were a male why would you feel the need to say "Though then there is the possibility of someone being harassed because they "appeared to be gay" or whatever" ??
Because its possible it might happen....just not with this particular OP right? Someone else, at a different place in a different time? Definitely! Maybe the OP lives in some sort of sexism vortex that makes it impossible for this to happen?0 -
It doesn't contribute to rape culture. It is symptomatic of rape culture. When you do that, you are in effect saying that her worth to you as a human being is based solely on her sex appeal. If I were you, I would really keep that sort of revelation to myself while I worked on it in therapy. If, in fact, you valued her for something else, you would express your interest in a different fashion.
If you think catcalling is hitting on someone, then I invite you to re-evaluate the statement about there not being a rape culture.Catcalling is hitting on someone, but hitting on someone doesn't mean catcalling.
You see what I did there? There are different ways to hit on someone. Catcalling is one of them, even though it is rude.
Please go with your poverty arguments lol
Ok so I whistle at a girl on the street or say "hey sexy what's up?"
How does that contribute to "rape culture"?
You have no argument left so when you get beat on one topic you switch to another, which you proceed to get wrecked on as well
So if I were to instead say "I really like that dress you're wearing today." By your logic wouldn't that also be saying her worth to me as a human being is based solely on how she looks?
You don't get to tell people how much worth they put into someone because of one action.0 -
You really don't get it, do you? You can look at women. You can smile at them. That's fine. Don't look at them lasciviously, don't holler at them from across the street (unless you know them), don't say something obscene to them, and if you're going to approach a woman with the intent of flirting or asking her out, do it in a way that shows you respect her as a human being, not just as a hot body you want to bang.
Because she is not walking down the street so that you can look at her. When it's part of culture that it's okay to do that, it sends the message to both men and women that women are here primarily for men's pleasure. And that contributes to rape culture.
If you think catcalling is hitting on someone, then I invite you to re-evaluate the statement about there not being a rape culture.Catcalling is hitting on someone, but hitting on someone doesn't mean catcalling.
You see what I did there? There are different ways to hit on someone. Catcalling is one of them, even though it is rude.
Please go with your poverty arguments lol
Ok so I whistle at a girl on the street or say "hey sexy what's up?"
How does that contribute to "rape culture"?
You have no argument left so when you get beat on one topic you switch to another, which you proceed to get wrecked on as well
I'm sorry I was unaware that females were some all mighty being that I have to avert my eyes from when I see them. As I said before, "rape culture" is the stupidest saying. No one is teaching that rape is ok. Everyone knows it's wrong. You could take anything and say "this promotes rape culture" just because you don't like it.
"My cashier smiled at me today. I'm not here for his pleasure. He needs to avert his eyes and stop promoting rape culture."0 -
Reductio ad absurdum. Always effective. :drinker:
Because she is not walking down the street so that you can look at her. When it's part of culture that it's okay to do that, it sends the message to both men and women that women are here primarily for men's pleasure. And that contributes to rape culture.
If you think catcalling is hitting on someone, then I invite you to re-evaluate the statement about there not being a rape culture.Catcalling is hitting on someone, but hitting on someone doesn't mean catcalling.
You see what I did there? There are different ways to hit on someone. Catcalling is one of them, even though it is rude.
Please go with your poverty arguments lol
Ok so I whistle at a girl on the street or say "hey sexy what's up?"
How does that contribute to "rape culture"?
You have no argument left so when you get beat on one topic you switch to another, which you proceed to get wrecked on as well
I'm sorry I was unaware that females were some all mighty being that I have to avert my eyes from when I see them. As I said before, "rape culture" is the stupidest saying. No one is teaching that rape is ok. Everyone knows it's wrong. You could take anything and say "this promotes rape culture" just because you don't like it.
"My cashier smiled at me today. I'm not here for his pleasure. He needs to avert his eyes and stop promoting rape culture."
By all means, continue to call it stupid. It doesn't diminish the fact of its existence in the slightest. The fact is, everyone knows rape is wrong. It's just that there are a lot of people out there with a lot of wrong-headed ideas about what constitutes rape. And apparently working to correct that is stupid.0 -
"I really like that dress you're wearing today" is polite, unless you say it while licking your lips or doing something else disgusting.
It doesn't contribute to rape culture. It is symptomatic of rape culture. When you do that, you are in effect saying that her worth to you as a human being is based solely on her sex appeal. If I were you, I would really keep that sort of revelation to myself while I worked on it in therapy. If, in fact, you valued her for something else, you would express your interest in a different fashion.
If you think catcalling is hitting on someone, then I invite you to re-evaluate the statement about there not being a rape culture.Catcalling is hitting on someone, but hitting on someone doesn't mean catcalling.
You see what I did there? There are different ways to hit on someone. Catcalling is one of them, even though it is rude.
Please go with your poverty arguments lol
Ok so I whistle at a girl on the street or say "hey sexy what's up?"
How does that contribute to "rape culture"?
You have no argument left so when you get beat on one topic you switch to another, which you proceed to get wrecked on as well
So if I were to instead say "I really like that dress you're wearing today." By your logic wouldn't that also be saying her worth to me as a human being is based solely on how she looks?
You don't get to tell people how much worth they put into someone because of one action.0 -
Of course not! That's an evaluative statement expressing an opinion about an object. There's no reason you shouldn't say something like that.So if I were to instead say "I really like that dress you're wearing today." By your logic wouldn't that also be saying her worth to me as a human being is based solely on how she looks?
You don't get to tell people how much worth they put into someone because of one action.0 -
"I really like that dress you're wearing today" is polite, unless you say it while licking your lips or doing something else disgusting.
It doesn't contribute to rape culture. It is symptomatic of rape culture. When you do that, you are in effect saying that her worth to you as a human being is based solely on her sex appeal. If I were you, I would really keep that sort of revelation to myself while I worked on it in therapy. If, in fact, you valued her for something else, you would express your interest in a different fashion.
If you think catcalling is hitting on someone, then I invite you to re-evaluate the statement about there not being a rape culture.Catcalling is hitting on someone, but hitting on someone doesn't mean catcalling.
You see what I did there? There are different ways to hit on someone. Catcalling is one of them, even though it is rude.
Please go with your poverty arguments lol
Ok so I whistle at a girl on the street or say "hey sexy what's up?"
How does that contribute to "rape culture"?
You have no argument left so when you get beat on one topic you switch to another, which you proceed to get wrecked on as well
So if I were to instead say "I really like that dress you're wearing today." By your logic wouldn't that also be saying her worth to me as a human being is based solely on how she looks?
You don't get to tell people how much worth they put into someone because of one action.
Like chewing food with their mouth open? Thats disgusting.0 -
You really don't get it, do you? You can look at women. You can smile at them. That's fine. Don't look at them lasciviously, don't holler at them from across the street (unless you know them), don't say something obscene to them, and if you're going to approach a woman with the intent of flirting or asking her out, do it in a way that shows you respect her as a human being, not just as a hot body you want to bang.
Because she is not walking down the street so that you can look at her. When it's part of culture that it's okay to do that, it sends the message to both men and women that women are here primarily for men's pleasure. And that contributes to rape culture.
If you think catcalling is hitting on someone, then I invite you to re-evaluate the statement about there not being a rape culture.Catcalling is hitting on someone, but hitting on someone doesn't mean catcalling.
You see what I did there? There are different ways to hit on someone. Catcalling is one of them, even though it is rude.
Please go with your poverty arguments lol
Ok so I whistle at a girl on the street or say "hey sexy what's up?"
How does that contribute to "rape culture"?
You have no argument left so when you get beat on one topic you switch to another, which you proceed to get wrecked on as well
I'm sorry I was unaware that females were some all mighty being that I have to avert my eyes from when I see them. As I said before, "rape culture" is the stupidest saying. No one is teaching that rape is ok. Everyone knows it's wrong. You could take anything and say "this promotes rape culture" just because you don't like it.
"My cashier smiled at me today. I'm not here for his pleasure. He needs to avert his eyes and stop promoting rape culture."
You really don't get it. What is acceptable to on person may not be acceptable to someone else. Who are you to say what is allowed and what is not? None of what you just said is against the law, so no one has to follow anything that you just said.
And once again you are getting completely off topic in an attempt to derail the discussion lol0 -
I dont usually post, but I found myself LOLing at all of this. Its been a little like torture getting thru reading this thread. Am I the only girl in here that isnt going to hate on men?
Have you ever been to a bar, strip club, idk just out of your houses? Girls have the advantage when out these days, not vice versa. Doyouevendate?
I have to say that two people getting drunk and having sex...is well pretty fun. It is enthusiastic actually. Ofc everything seems like a better idea when drunk. No great story ever begins with "man after my last salad we got wild and......"
We all know our inhibitions are lessened as we drink... so make the call of not drinking if you dont want to end up in bed with Mr. right now.
Catcalls promoting rape culture??? Secretly, we like it. We may act all...OMG I cant believe he said that... but inside...admit it. We would much rather be the girl someone finds attractive than not. We wouldn't spend hours getting ready for no one to notice.... ALSO.. I hear us girls doing it also. Mebe not hanging out the car window... but we do it.. Again, ever been to a male stripclub? The doors shut and all the sudden its girls gone wild and his pants need to go.
live a little. No one gets raped by catcall.0 -
I don't see how this is off topic at all. It seems laser-focused on what sorts of things are sexist, using the OP as an example.
You really don't get it, do you? You can look at women. You can smile at them. That's fine. Don't look at them lasciviously, don't holler at them from across the street (unless you know them), don't say something obscene to them, and if you're going to approach a woman with the intent of flirting or asking her out, do it in a way that shows you respect her as a human being, not just as a hot body you want to bang.
Because she is not walking down the street so that you can look at her. When it's part of culture that it's okay to do that, it sends the message to both men and women that women are here primarily for men's pleasure. And that contributes to rape culture.
If you think catcalling is hitting on someone, then I invite you to re-evaluate the statement about there not being a rape culture.Catcalling is hitting on someone, but hitting on someone doesn't mean catcalling.
You see what I did there? There are different ways to hit on someone. Catcalling is one of them, even though it is rude.
Please go with your poverty arguments lol
Ok so I whistle at a girl on the street or say "hey sexy what's up?"
How does that contribute to "rape culture"?
You have no argument left so when you get beat on one topic you switch to another, which you proceed to get wrecked on as well
I'm sorry I was unaware that females were some all mighty being that I have to avert my eyes from when I see them. As I said before, "rape culture" is the stupidest saying. No one is teaching that rape is ok. Everyone knows it's wrong. You could take anything and say "this promotes rape culture" just because you don't like it.
"My cashier smiled at me today. I'm not here for his pleasure. He needs to avert his eyes and stop promoting rape culture."
You really don't get it. What is acceptable to on person may not be acceptable to someone else. Who are you to say what is allowed and what is not? None of what you just said is against the law, so no one has to follow anything that you just said.
And once again you are getting completely off topic in an attempt to derail the discussion lol
Just because something is legal doesn't mean it isn't douchey or sexist.0 -
Of course not! That's an evaluative statement expressing an opinion about an object. There's no reason you shouldn't say something like that.So if I were to instead say "I really like that dress you're wearing today." By your logic wouldn't that also be saying her worth to me as a human being is based solely on how she looks?
You don't get to tell people how much worth they put into someone because of one action.
But what if I don't like the girls dress and I am only interested in having sex with her and that's it? If I tell her I like her dress then I would be lying. Lying is wrong.0 -
First of all, no, it's not against the law, so I can't tell you not to do it. I can tell you, though, that if you want women to not be intimidated by you, it's probably best not to do that. And how is that off-topic? This whole thread started with catcalling!
You really don't get it, do you? You can look at women. You can smile at them. That's fine. Don't look at them lasciviously, don't holler at them from across the street (unless you know them), don't say something obscene to them, and if you're going to approach a woman with the intent of flirting or asking her out, do it in a way that shows you respect her as a human being, not just as a hot body you want to bang.
Because she is not walking down the street so that you can look at her. When it's part of culture that it's okay to do that, it sends the message to both men and women that women are here primarily for men's pleasure. And that contributes to rape culture.
If you think catcalling is hitting on someone, then I invite you to re-evaluate the statement about there not being a rape culture.Catcalling is hitting on someone, but hitting on someone doesn't mean catcalling.
You see what I did there? There are different ways to hit on someone. Catcalling is one of them, even though it is rude.
Please go with your poverty arguments lol
Ok so I whistle at a girl on the street or say "hey sexy what's up?"
How does that contribute to "rape culture"?
You have no argument left so when you get beat on one topic you switch to another, which you proceed to get wrecked on as well
I'm sorry I was unaware that females were some all mighty being that I have to avert my eyes from when I see them. As I said before, "rape culture" is the stupidest saying. No one is teaching that rape is ok. Everyone knows it's wrong. You could take anything and say "this promotes rape culture" just because you don't like it.
"My cashier smiled at me today. I'm not here for his pleasure. He needs to avert his eyes and stop promoting rape culture."
You really don't get it. What is acceptable to on person may not be acceptable to someone else. Who are you to say what is allowed and what is not? None of what you just said is against the law, so no one has to follow anything that you just said.
And once again you are getting completely off topic in an attempt to derail the discussion lol0 -
I dont usually post, but I found myself LOLing at all of this. Its been a little like torture getting thru reading this thread. Am I the only girl in here that isnt going to hate on men?
Have you ever been to a bar, strip club, idk just out of your houses? Girls have the advantage when out these days, not vice versa. Doyouevendate?
I have to say that two people getting drunk and having sex...is well pretty fun. It is enthusiastic actually. Ofc everything seems like a better idea when drunk. No great story ever begins with "man after my last salad we got wild and......"
We all know our inhibitions are lessened as we drink... so make the call of not drinking if you dont want to end up in bed with Mr. right now.
Catcalls promoting rape culture??? Secretly, we like it. We may act all...OMG I cant believe he said that... but inside...admit it. We would much rather be the girl someone finds attractive than not. We wouldn't spend hours getting ready for no one to notice.... ALSO.. I hear us girls doing it also. Mebe not hanging out the car window... but we do it.. Again, ever been to a male stripclub? The doors shut and all the sudden its girls gone wild and his pants need to go.
live a little. No one gets raped by catcall.
in after female misc0 -
*shrugs*
I don't know.
Sometimes it's nice to be whistled at when you're walking down the street or have someone give you a once over you and say "Lookin' GOOD!"
I work hard on my body not just for me but for the enjoyment of others. :drinker:0 -
First of all, no, it's not against the law, so I can't tell you not to do it. I can tell you, though, that if you want women to not be intimidated by you, it's probably best not to do that. And how is that off-topic? This whole thread started with catcalling!
You really don't get it, do you? You can look at women. You can smile at them. That's fine. Don't look at them lasciviously, don't holler at them from across the street (unless you know them), don't say something obscene to them, and if you're going to approach a woman with the intent of flirting or asking her out, do it in a way that shows you respect her as a human being, not just as a hot body you want to bang.
Because she is not walking down the street so that you can look at her. When it's part of culture that it's okay to do that, it sends the message to both men and women that women are here primarily for men's pleasure. And that contributes to rape culture.
If you think catcalling is hitting on someone, then I invite you to re-evaluate the statement about there not being a rape culture.Catcalling is hitting on someone, but hitting on someone doesn't mean catcalling.
You see what I did there? There are different ways to hit on someone. Catcalling is one of them, even though it is rude.
Please go with your poverty arguments lol
Ok so I whistle at a girl on the street or say "hey sexy what's up?"
How does that contribute to "rape culture"?
You have no argument left so when you get beat on one topic you switch to another, which you proceed to get wrecked on as well
I'm sorry I was unaware that females were some all mighty being that I have to avert my eyes from when I see them. As I said before, "rape culture" is the stupidest saying. No one is teaching that rape is ok. Everyone knows it's wrong. You could take anything and say "this promotes rape culture" just because you don't like it.
"My cashier smiled at me today. I'm not here for his pleasure. He needs to avert his eyes and stop promoting rape culture."
You really don't get it. What is acceptable to on person may not be acceptable to someone else. Who are you to say what is allowed and what is not? None of what you just said is against the law, so no one has to follow anything that you just said.
And once again you are getting completely off topic in an attempt to derail the discussion lol
But who are you to say people shouldn't catcall? Just because you don't like it? As the girl above just said a lot of girls secretly like it.0 -
I dont usually post, but I found myself LOLing at all of this. Its been a little like torture getting thru reading this thread. Am I the only girl in here that isnt going to hate on men?
Have you ever been to a bar, strip club, idk just out of your houses? Girls have the advantage when out these days, not vice versa. Doyouevendate?
I have to say that two people getting drunk and having sex...is well pretty fun. It is enthusiastic actually. Ofc everything seems like a better idea when drunk. No great story ever begins with "man after my last salad we got wild and......"
We all know our inhibitions are lessened as we drink... so make the call of not drinking if you dont want to end up in bed with Mr. right now.
Catcalls promoting rape culture??? Secretly, we like it. We may act all...OMG I cant believe he said that... but inside...admit it. We would much rather be the girl someone finds attractive than not. We wouldn't spend hours getting ready for no one to notice.... ALSO.. I hear us girls doing it also. Mebe not hanging out the car window... but we do it.. Again, ever been to a male stripclub? The doors shut and all the sudden its girls gone wild and his pants need to go.
live a little. No one gets raped by catcall.
finally a poster that isn't blindly against men and their evil penis agenda0 -
I don't hate on men. Most of my friends are men. I prefer the company of men to the company of women. I guess I'm just choosy about what those men are like.I dont usually post, but I found myself LOLing at all of this. Its been a little like torture getting thru reading this thread. Am I the only girl in here that isnt going to hate on men?
Have you ever been to a bar, strip club, idk just out of your houses? Girls have the advantage when out these days, not vice versa. Doyouevendate?
I have to say that two people getting drunk and having sex...is well pretty fun. It is enthusiastic actually. Ofc everything seems like a better idea when drunk. No great story ever begins with "man after my last salad we got wild and......"
We all know our inhibitions are lessened as we drink... so make the call of not drinking if you dont want to end up in bed with Mr. right now.
Catcalls promoting rape culture??? Secretly, we like it. We may act all...OMG I cant believe he said that... but inside...admit it. We would much rather be the girl someone finds attractive than not. We wouldn't spend hours getting ready for no one to notice.... ALSO.. I hear us girls doing it also. Mebe not hanging out the car window... but we do it.. Again, ever been to a male stripclub? The doors shut and all the sudden its girls gone wild and his pants need to go.
live a little. No one gets raped by catcall.
Why would I ever go to a strip club? I don't like the music, I don't drink, and I don't really care to look at naked women (or men, really *shrug*).
And no, Idon'tevendate. Because I've been happily married for almost 21 years. But if I was single, I sure wouldn't put up with the crap I see younger women putting up with today.
I am scratching my eyeballs out over the statement that "we" secretly like catcalls. "Secretly liking it" is very thin ice, I'm sure you can agree.
Just because women are being just as sexist pigs as men does not mean that the behavior is not sexist and piggish. It just means women can be equally douchey. Which I have never, ever disputed.0
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