The downside of being cute...

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Replies

  • Staniel_2013
    Staniel_2013 Posts: 120 Member
    Sorry but being "cute" doesn't make him want to have sex?

    Wow, that's a load of BS. I love "cute' women, they drive me absolutely insane.

    The "child-like" comment is a little off though. Still think it's a bull**** cop-out.

    Sorry, but in my opinion, it's pretty much over. He is either a) cheating or b) not that interested in the relationship anymore. Or he could be turning gay, seems crazy but you would be surprised. Met this amazingly gorgeous women at the mall, turns out she was getting divorced because her husband was trolling the internet for gay sex/cheating with other men. Awkward.

    I don't believe in the whole honeymoon stage, less sex over time in a relationship. If you are TRULY interesting and like/love the person you are with, how could you not want to spend time nekid with lots of heavy petting?

    Honestly too, sex is a VERY IMPORTANT part of a relationship with someone. If you don't like spending said time in the sack together, then you really don't like each other that much.

    Or you could be one of those strange people who TRUELY does not enjoy sex but I have yet to find someone who isn't full of it.
  • PghPensFan69
    PghPensFan69 Posts: 2,393 Member
    U+mad+bro_493e44_3135246.jpg
  • Autk79
    Autk79 Posts: 286 Member
    Get rid of him now. I cant believe someone could say that to anyone. There are plenty of men who would find you beautiful because you are. Its a cop out. Like someone else said, I guarentee you had the same cuteness when he first started dating you. Dont ever change yourself for someone else. Do it for yourself and the next guy :noway:
  • Autk79
    Autk79 Posts: 286 Member
    It kind of sickens me how many people apparently think OP should value frequent sex over an otherwise perfectly healthy-sounding relationship... good to know where all the horndogs are.


    @Ramberta, you've made a lot of good points and I appreciate it. Our relationship is really great otherwise, and that's why I'm trying to find a solution instead of bailing just so I can get laid more often.

    He has gained about 20 lbs since we moved in together, and he was a heavy pot smoker, so I really do think that contributes to his lack of desire.

    I dont think you should get rid of him because of lack of sex. If he is having Man problems he should of been a man and said it or came up with something else. To cut you down or make you feel like its something you are doing or that you are just "cute" is enough to make me walk away. No offense but I couldnt forget that.
  • cowgirlqueen
    cowgirlqueen Posts: 466 Member
    I'm not a relationship expert, or anything even close. but I have mostly all male friends an have seen and heard this from their girlfriends. (not exactly what your guy said but the complaint of lack of sex in general) an i'll tell you what i tell them ...... just flip the switch on him... sometimes in a relationship when your the one who always wants it and always initiates it , it gets boring for the other person (not saying this is the case) but guys love a challenge. some men will hit on the same woman just because someone else is and with no real goal in mind other than winning. so when there is no challenge it can sometimes result in lack of interest. so ignore him for a little while. keep covered up as much as possible. be as unsexy (attitude & clothes wise) as possible for 2-3weeks and then slowly bring it back to him.. you know dress reveling but don't let him do anything with you tell him YOUR not interested.... that will result in him seeing you as challenge. you'll then become a goal/ something to conquer.
  • BinaryPulsar
    BinaryPulsar Posts: 8,927 Member
    Zombie thread.
  • devil_in_a_blue_dress
    devil_in_a_blue_dress Posts: 5,214 Member
    Apparently PensFan is bored tonight.
  • PghPensFan69
    PghPensFan69 Posts: 2,393 Member
    Apparently PensFan is bored tonight.

    My first post was this afternoon and wasn't bored. :drinker:
  • devil_in_a_blue_dress
    devil_in_a_blue_dress Posts: 5,214 Member
    Apparently PensFan is bored tonight.

    My first post was this afternoon and wasn't bored. :drinker:

    Just lame?
  • PghPensFan69
    PghPensFan69 Posts: 2,393 Member
    Apparently PensFan is bored tonight.

    My first post was this afternoon and wasn't bored. :drinker:

    Just lame?

    Nope, just following my Tuesday theme. But I do appreciate your kind words. :flowerforyou:
  • devil_in_a_blue_dress
    devil_in_a_blue_dress Posts: 5,214 Member
    Apparently PensFan is bored tonight.

    My first post was this afternoon and wasn't bored. :drinker:

    Just lame?

    Nope, just following my Tuesday theme. But I do appreciate your kind words. :flowerforyou:

    I am such a terrible meanie.

    ETA: At least I didn't say you weren't too cute?
  • PghPensFan69
    PghPensFan69 Posts: 2,393 Member
    Apparently PensFan is bored tonight.

    My first post was this afternoon and wasn't bored. :drinker:

    Just lame?

    Nope, just following my Tuesday theme. But I do appreciate your kind words. :flowerforyou:

    I am such a terrible meanie.

    ETA: At least I didn't say you weren't too cute?

    lol Don't worry, I won't create a thread about how mean people are. I might find a year old one to bump though :tongue:
  • devil_in_a_blue_dress
    devil_in_a_blue_dress Posts: 5,214 Member
    Apparently PensFan is bored tonight.

    My first post was this afternoon and wasn't bored. :drinker:

    Just lame?

    Nope, just following my Tuesday theme. But I do appreciate your kind words. :flowerforyou:

    I am such a terrible meanie.

    ETA: At least I didn't say you weren't too cute?

    lol Don't worry, I won't create a thread about how mean people are. I might find a year old one to bump though :tongue:

    Acceptable.
  • Sinisterly
    Sinisterly Posts: 10,913 Member
    Lol oh boy. What did I miss.
  • AllOutof_Bubblegum
    AllOutof_Bubblegum Posts: 3,646 Member
    His excuse sounds more than a little bogus. If this is a non-compromising situation, start planning your exit strategy.
  • wheird
    wheird Posts: 7,963 Member
    I hear there is a vitamin D deficiency in here.
  • addysolari
    addysolari Posts: 181 Member
    There is an inverse relationship between pants worn and sex had
  • SrJoben
    SrJoben Posts: 484 Member
    I have the same issue. My husband told me that I'm so cute that I could never be beautiful. It sucks really bad. The smaller I get, the "cuter" I get. SMH!

    I wish I had some advice for you.

    I just wanted to address this in case no one else had even though the thread has moved on a lot.

    Cute and beautiful are different as far as a lot of guys are concerned. But one isn't necessarily better or more attractive than the other. You're hearing it as him saying you are not beautiful, but he probably meant it as something more analagous to saying your too brunette to be blond.

    Keep in mind he married you.
  • jbugiel
    jbugiel Posts: 59 Member
    you look like a young adult to me, maybe he's attracted to older women or he's full of s***
    i would like to see a man's response to this post

    I'm a man, my wife is 4'10" and very cute IMO. I have sex with her. I know, crazy right? BTW. Since I'm sharing, she's also sexy even though she's cute, I have no idea what your man is talking about, something is fishy here. No accusations or anything like cheating, but I would politely have another conversation, cuz that should bother you, it would bother me.
  • BusyRaeNOTBusty
    BusyRaeNOTBusty Posts: 7,166 Member
    This post is a year old and OP hasn't been around sense. I wonder how it's working out...
  • PghPensFan69
    PghPensFan69 Posts: 2,393 Member
    Lol oh boy. What did I miss.

    The OP's significant other finds it difficult to be sexually attracted to her because she is cute.
  • Sinisterly
    Sinisterly Posts: 10,913 Member
    Lol oh boy. What did I miss.

    The OP's significant other finds it difficult to be sexually attracted to her because she is cute.
    She is super cute, though. That's a good thing!
  • PghPensFan69
    PghPensFan69 Posts: 2,393 Member
    Lol oh boy. What did I miss.

    The OP's significant other finds it difficult to be sexually attracted to her because she is cute.
    She is super cute, though. That's a good thing!

    I agree. My guess is her man has someone else or is gay
  • BondBomb
    BondBomb Posts: 1,781 Member
    So, MFPers, I have an off-the-wall question for you...

    As of late, my (27 y/o) SO has been wanting sex less and less. I finally confronted him about it, and he admitted that he thinks I am more adorable in a child-like way than sexy, and he finds it very difficult to be sexually attracted to me because of that.

    I kind of get it. I have big eyes, I'm short, we act silly together, and I've gone down 2 pant sizes in the past 45 days to boot. But I've been very thin before and no one else has ever had a problem with it!

    I've always had a... voracious sexual appetite, and he's always been more mellow about it, but darn it, one can only go so long!

    Do I need to make an extreme effort to "act sexy", or does he need to accept that I'm young looking? Both?

    Thank you for ANY input on this matter, I know it's kind of weird.

    He might be Gay...you are an attractive woman who works out. A puppy is 'cute'..a girlfriend has to be sexy.

    yep....GAY.

    So if a gay guys Mr whoopee doesn't rise to the occasion does that mean he's gone straight ?
    I apologize if this has been said already. But you are an adult. You can say penis.
  • siport
    siport Posts: 7,429 Member
    omg she said Penis! thats so not allowed!

    oh damm i said it, im going to hell!!!!!!!
  • V0lver
    V0lver Posts: 915 Member

    I apologize if this has been said already. But you are an adult. You can say penis.

    860080.gif
  • TheArchyBunker
    TheArchyBunker Posts: 1,967 Member
    Kind of the same boat. 13 years now and it's getting less and less I lose more she's less interested. But she also puts mother needs and kids before me and anything between us. It's all about the kids. My weight loss hasn't helped any as she liked me "chubby" hell I was just fat not chubby lol.
  • Monkey_Business
    Monkey_Business Posts: 1,800 Member

    Again, if he had issues with it, she would know. Men still get hard in their 80s. Trust me, I know.

    Well Hello there :flowerforyou:
  • tmm_0127
    tmm_0127 Posts: 545 Member
    I find it a little odd that this is all of a sudden becoming an issue for him. Obviously he had the hots for you before, and your looks haven't changed, so it's a problem with him and not you.
  • TheRoadDog
    TheRoadDog Posts: 11,788 Member
    So, MFPers, I have an off-the-wall question for you...

    As of late, my (27 y/o) SO has been wanting sex less and less. I finally confronted him about it, and he admitted that he thinks I am more adorable in a child-like way than sexy, and he finds it very difficult to be sexually attracted to me because of that.

    I kind of get it. I have big eyes, I'm short, we act silly together, and I've gone down 2 pant sizes in the past 45 days to boot. But I've been very thin before and no one else has ever had a problem with it!

    I've always had a... voracious sexual appetite, and he's always been more mellow about it, but darn it, one can only go so long!

    Do I need to make an extreme effort to "act sexy", or does he need to accept that I'm young looking? Both?

    Thank you for ANY input on this matter, I know it's kind of weird.

    Total cop out. He is losing interest and doesn't have the balls to admit it. Real love for another doesn't diminish over "cuteness". Been with my wife for over 25 years and love her more than I did in the beginning. I'm nothing to look at and almost 60, but my wife still looks at me like I'm something special.

    Move on. You deserve better.