Why are people so hateful??

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  • PikaKnight
    PikaKnight Posts: 34,971 Member
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    I've had people jump on an idea I posted in a thread and rip it apart and gif post and "jump" on me.

    http://www.myfitnesspal.com/topics/show/1297097-a-simple-thought-on-how-to-set-a-calorie-goal

    So what. They didn't like the idea I posted. I explained it, they explained themselves, I got their point and decided to rephrase, we had a good laugh at it and that was that. I really don't see that as "bullying" or "hate"

    If I had responded defensively I'm sure I would have gotten pilled on more...again though, that isn't bullying...that is people responding to your responses.

    If you are an adult and you are on an internet forum and you claim to have been bullied I have to seriously question how overly sensitive you are.

    Looks like you've got some big girl panties there.

    A good number of people currently on my friends list got there by destroying one of my posts in an articulate manner.

    I'm the exception that snuck on there because I got the good gifs.
  • likitisplit
    likitisplit Posts: 9,420 Member
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    Nice is relative. Matter-of-fact is often confused with being mean. Also, disagreement is not being mean. I may not agree with your approach at all, but because I say so doesn't mean I'm being mean to you. If you're juicing, I happen to think juicing is stupid. So, I'm going to say that to you. And, I say that to people in real life too. It's not mean, it actually is stupid.

    But calling someone stupid IS mean. As someone who has tried juicing, I agree, it doesn't help you lose weight in the long run and is definitely bad for you. That doesn't mean calling people who do it stupid is called for or reasonable.

    This is where some of the misunderstandings come from - this poster did not call anyone "stupid". The poster gave his/her opinion that the act of juicing was stupid. Read the words - not what you think it means.

    Edited to say I kept reading and this was covered in depth. There should be an alert when a mean people thread starts, I always come late.

    Get better friends.
  • wheird
    wheird Posts: 7,963 Member
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    I've had people jump on an idea I posted in a thread and rip it apart and gif post and "jump" on me.

    http://www.myfitnesspal.com/topics/show/1297097-a-simple-thought-on-how-to-set-a-calorie-goal

    So what. They didn't like the idea I posted. I explained it, they explained themselves, I got their point and decided to rephrase, we had a good laugh at it and that was that. I really don't see that as "bullying" or "hate"

    If I had responded defensively I'm sure I would have gotten pilled on more...again though, that isn't bullying...that is people responding to your responses.

    If you are an adult and you are on an internet forum and you claim to have been bullied I have to seriously question how overly sensitive you are.

    Looks like you've got some big girl panties there.

    A good number of people currently on my friends list got there by destroying one of my posts in an articulate manner.

    I'm the exception that snuck on there because I got the good gifs.

    Maybe these are the reasons I rarely get FRs these days. My boycott on being helpful so long as MFP works against me has a downside!
  • Capt_Inzane
    Capt_Inzane Posts: 733 Member
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    And realize she made that post MULTIPLE times at least 1-2 weeks apart..and the first time she made the post was when she first created the account.

    Why would you come on a fitness site, create an account and post that?

    Trolls. They don't just live under the bridge. There are legit ones out there.

    Hell I dunno why someone would post it but that doesn't mean you have to go read it? People go in and read those types of threads with the intentions of stirring the pot. One person starts and then everyone jumps in. It's the riot mentality. Did I think "wow wtf, this is a troll" probably in fact yea I think I did. Did I respond? I don't think so, hell I can't remember (hope I didn't say something bad lol).

    I'm just saying that Internet bullying is a real thing and it shouldn't be here (a site meant to help people). Don't try to justify it by saying "Well X forums are WAY worse" who cares. That's like saying "well I only shot 3 people I'm not as bad as those other kids who killed 10". Be accountable for your own actions.
  • Capt_Inzane
    Capt_Inzane Posts: 733 Member
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    The worst part about writing all this is that I don't disagree with the majority of you. I just feel bad for those few people that actually had to leave or whatever.

    I think I need a snickers... I normally would align myself more with Joker than Batman
  • mattwb72
    mattwb72 Posts: 4
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    Welcome to the internet, where people are *kitten* and their opinions don't matter.
  • Noogynoogs
    Noogynoogs Posts: 1,028 Member
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    If you don't let comments affect you -, your invincible. Make your own mind up
  • JoRocka
    JoRocka Posts: 17,525 Member
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    d4e6b765-137d-454e-a9de-e388ceb6ea42_zps12d3c4c6.jpg

    Gelato Fiasco Peanut Butter Stracciatella. :love: :love: :love:

    <le sigh>

    I love stracciatella ANYTHING. Seriously- ANYTHING. Plus I love the name- so sexy.
    I went there because people kept saying how bad it was and I wanted to go see.

    Never again. *shudders in horror*
    I was on the Knot for a while- I think they have "the nest" as another forum- and I am glad I never went in there- maybe when i'm bored i'll pop in- although pregnant people weird me out. Little parasites growing in them- it's like watching Fringe- but in real life.

    Speaking of weirded out- anyone see the "my wife didn't want to do maternity pictures so I did them for her" photo shoot?

    HYSTERICAL.
  • Aaron_K123
    Aaron_K123 Posts: 7,122 Member
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    Okay actually now that I think of it one person on my friends list got there by me sending them an invite after a rather long exchange in which they called me a hypocrite.

    I don't know does that qualify as name calling?

    Here is the thing. If someone thinks I am being a hypocrite and I am having an active discussion with that person then I feel it is in my best interest to know that and it is most easily conveyed by them calling me a hypocrite. To me this is just being honest in a discussion, I am not sure why I am supposed to feel bad about that.

    Presumably said person called me a hypocrite because they found one or two actions or statements I made to be hypocritical not because they thing I was born as and will irrevocalby always be a hypocrite and that is somehow a trait of mine. It isn't personal.

    And if they found something I said or something I did to be hypocritical guess what...I can disagree with them and explain why I felt my action or statement was actually in line with my stated beliefs. Then they can explain themselves. That is having a discussion.

    The only way it is bullying is if you cannot extract yourself from the situation and one person is overpowering to the other. This typically only happens as a child. No one here is going to "overpower" me over the internet and if I don't like a situation I can close the web browser.
  • wheird
    wheird Posts: 7,963 Member
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    And realize she made that post MULTIPLE times at least 1-2 weeks apart..and the first time she made the post was when she first created the account.

    Why would you come on a fitness site, create an account and post that?

    Trolls. They don't just live under the bridge. There are legit ones out there.

    Hell I dunno why someone would post it but that doesn't mean you have to go read it? People go in and read those types of threads with the intentions of stirring the pot. One person starts and then everyone jumps in. It's the riot mentality. Did I think "wow wtf, this is a troll" probably in fact yea I think I did. Did I respond? I don't think so, hell I can't remember (hope I didn't say something bad lol).

    I'm just saying that Internet bullying is a real thing and it shouldn't be here (a site meant to help people). Don't try to justify it by saying "Well X forums are WAY worse" who cares. That's like saying "well I only shot 3 people I'm not as bad as those other kids who killed 10". Be accountable for your own actions.

    The person can remove themselves from a bullying situation online.
  • melinda200208
    melinda200208 Posts: 525 Member
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    I think some people have nothing better to do and enjoy putting people down and trying to make them feel bad or try to cause conflict. Their lives must really be boring. Or they are just downright mean people :(
  • sjaplo
    sjaplo Posts: 974 Member
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    Nice is relative. Matter-of-fact is often confused with being mean. Also, disagreement is not being mean. I may not agree with your approach at all, but because I say so doesn't mean I'm being mean to you. If you're juicing, I happen to think juicing is stupid. So, I'm going to say that to you. And, I say that to people in real life too. It's not mean, it actually is stupid.

    But calling someone stupid IS mean. As someone who has tried juicing, I agree, it doesn't help you lose weight in the long run and is definitely bad for you. That doesn't mean calling people who do it stupid is called for or reasonable.

    This is where some of the misunderstandings come from - this poster did not call anyone "stupid". The poster gave his/her opinion that the act of juicing was stupid. Read the words - not what you think it means.

    Edited to say I kept reading and this was covered in depth. There should be an alert when a mean people thread starts, I always come late.

    Get better friends.

    Fair response as I have zero - maybe I'll start an "I'm so lonely thread"?
  • wheird
    wheird Posts: 7,963 Member
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    I think some people have nothing better to do and enjoy putting people down and trying to make them feel bad or try to cause conflict. Their lives must really be boring. Or they are just downright mean people :(

    *raises hand*
  • Noogynoogs
    Noogynoogs Posts: 1,028 Member
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    Don't forget people are calorie counting and moody is the side effect lol
  • dbmata
    dbmata Posts: 12,950 Member
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    gaming forums and mother/baby forums...especially the mother/baby ones.

    One drunken bet had me making a baby/mother forum account and asking what the proper dose was to help quiet down my teething infant. (I have no child.)

    HOLY COW. I had my life threatened, people threatened to call CPS, and within 27 minutes I was banned. I only made ONE post.

    Was truly epic.
  • PikaKnight
    PikaKnight Posts: 34,971 Member
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    And realize she made that post MULTIPLE times at least 1-2 weeks apart..and the first time she made the post was when she first created the account.

    Why would you come on a fitness site, create an account and post that?

    Trolls. They don't just live under the bridge. There are legit ones out there.

    Hell I dunno why someone would post it but that doesn't mean you have to go read it? People go in and read those types of threads with the intentions of stirring the pot. One person starts and then everyone jumps in. It's the riot mentality. Did I think "wow wtf, this is a troll" probably in fact yea I think I did. Did I respond? I don't think so, hell I can't remember (hope I didn't say something bad lol).

    I'm just saying that Internet bullying is a real thing and it shouldn't be here (a site meant to help people). Don't try to justify it by saying "Well X forums are WAY worse" who cares. That's like saying "well I only shot 3 people I'm not as bad as those other kids who killed 10". Be accountable for your own actions.

    So they absolutely cannot just leave the thread, right? We are literally backing them into a corner and there is no possible way for them to avoid dealing with us at all..like the ignore option that's available on the website.

    Again, bullying. It's a word that's been overused and demeans those that have actually been bullied. And keep in mind internet bullying is usually tied in with real life situations. You don't know anyone on here, so again..how is it bullying when you have the option to not return to a thread, ignore users and even report them?
  • likitisplit
    likitisplit Posts: 9,420 Member
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    And realize she made that post MULTIPLE times at least 1-2 weeks apart..and the first time she made the post was when she first created the account.

    Why would you come on a fitness site, create an account and post that?

    Trolls. They don't just live under the bridge. There are legit ones out there.

    Hell I dunno why someone would post it but that doesn't mean you have to go read it? People go in and read those types of threads with the intentions of stirring the pot. One person starts and then everyone jumps in. It's the riot mentality. Did I think "wow wtf, this is a troll" probably in fact yea I think I did. Did I respond? I don't think so, hell I can't remember (hope I didn't say something bad lol).

    I'm just saying that Internet bullying is a real thing and it shouldn't be here (a site meant to help people). Don't try to justify it by saying "Well X forums are WAY worse" who cares. That's like saying "well I only shot 3 people I'm not as bad as those other kids who killed 10". Be accountable for your own actions.

    It's not bullying if it's a situation where an adult can walk away without real life consequences. Hell, there are people on here who have nearly made a profession of deactivating and reinventing themselves with new user names when they feel too much heat. Eventually they get it right.

    I feel for the kids who are in a situation where their entire social circle is making life intolerable and they don't have the adult perspective to allow an escape. MFP isn't a place where that's a possibility.

    That being said, yeah, I saw the purse thread and I didn't comment on it because WTF, this again? You know. I own my behavior too.
  • likitisplit
    likitisplit Posts: 9,420 Member
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    gaming forums and mother/baby forums...especially the mother/baby ones.

    One drunken bet had me making a baby/mother forum account and asking what the proper dose was to help quiet down my teething infant. (I have no child.)

    HOLY COW. I had my life threatened, people threatened to call CPS, and within 27 minutes I was banned. I only made ONE post.

    Was truly epic.

    Dose of what?
  • AglaeaC
    AglaeaC Posts: 1,974 Member
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    d4e6b765-137d-454e-a9de-e388ceb6ea42_zps12d3c4c6.jpg

    Gelato Fiasco Peanut Butter Stracciatella. :love: :love: :love:

    <le sigh>

    I love stracciatella ANYTHING. Seriously- ANYTHING. Plus I love the name- so sexy.
    I went there because people kept saying how bad it was and I wanted to go see.

    Never again. *shudders in horror*
    I was on the Knot for a while- I think they have "the nest" as another forum- and I am glad I never went in there- maybe when i'm bored i'll pop in- although pregnant people weird me out. Little parasites growing in them- it's like watching Fringe- but in real life.

    Speaking of weirded out- anyone see the "my wife didn't want to do maternity pictures so I did them for her" photo shoot?

    HYSTERICAL.
    Another straciatella lover here. And I've been on The Knot, too, or should I say Land of Bridezilla. The Nest I only ever peeked in on and decided it was quite ugh.
  • Donald_Dozier_50
    Donald_Dozier_50 Posts: 395 Member
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    Anyone else come in line with some down right hostile threads going on here.....This is supposed to be a place of help and support, not ripping each other to shreds on who is right and wrong. Just because it worked for you doesn't mean it will for someone else and vice versa. Am I alone on this? :grumble:

    COWARDS who are afraid to stand up to people face to face where they could easily get their A** kicked are capable of coming online and saying what they please as they hide behind the computer screen in their mommy's basement where they live.

    Almost didn't recognize you because you took your face pictures off. Is the only thing you post about how people are cowards behind the computer screen? It's like your thing, isn't it?

    You obviously don't recognize me and assume me to be someone else. I am one who is fully prepared to confront anyone IN PERSON. I have never had any face picture here. You are obviously clueless and the exact person my post was about.
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