Confession Time! ((ABSOLUTELY NO JUDGEMENT))

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  • ladybuggnorris
    ladybuggnorris Posts: 276 Member
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    I'M BAAAAACK!

    Confession: I am skipping 100 pages because it is too overwhelming to think I can EVER catch up again!

    I have missed you all!
  • kellienw335
    kellienw335 Posts: 1,745 Member
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    I'M BAAAAACK!

    Confession: I am skipping 100 pages because it is too overwhelming to think I can EVER catch up again!

    I have missed you all!

    We missed you too! Are you finished painting the house?
  • ythannah
    ythannah Posts: 4,365 Member
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    I am really upset this morning because my degu is dying, I am sure of it now.....he has almost completely stopped eating and now his fur is falling out.....I was up at 4am hand feeding him corn flakes but have to leave for work now and am terrified he is going to die by himself in his cage while I am not home....I can't stop crying......its gonna be a long day, or few days, every time I have to leave the house.....

    I'm sorry you're going through this :'(

    I've been there with one of my former dogs and it's hellish.
  • tulips_and_tea
    tulips_and_tea Posts: 5,711 Member
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    spamarie wrote: »
    Caught up!

    I'm not too worried about this parenting thing. I'm worried about the nitty, grittiness of sleep deprivation and exhaustion that comes with the early days, but beyond ensuring the kid's physical well-being, I feel like the actual 'parenting' part will be okay. I'm a decent person. My husband is a decent person. My parents were decent people and my siblings and I turned out fine. Not a lot of drama, not a lot of scares and we all put up with one another to varying degrees. Sure I expect there will be arguments and frustrations and bumps in the road, but I'm not aiming for perfection as I think that probably doesn't exist.

    Am I being too blasé about the whole thing?!

    No. Babies, while in the womb feed off of a mother's stress or lack thereof. The more relaxed you are, the better for the baby.

    After they are born, they still feed off of the stress level of the people they are around the most. IME, relaxed, easy-going parents seem happier. Still balancing out discipline, of course. But not getting worked up over every little thing, losing your temper, etc. will benefit both you and your baby. During your pregnancy, don't let all the horror stories of others change your attitude you posted above!
  • tulips_and_tea
    tulips_and_tea Posts: 5,711 Member
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    Another rather lame confession: I haven't the slightest idea what to do with my hair. I haven't had short hair since I was a baby just starting to grow it. I wish I had the courage to chop it up or do something with it, but I'm just scared of making it look worse. It's extremely wavy (and in my opinion, not the good kind of wavy!!!) and hard to manage, so I just straighten it all the time to make it easier for me to deal with, at least. It also wants to always be parted in the middle. I went to see a hair stylist last year and she told me that my hair was "refusing to be parted down the side." Dumb hair.

    My sister has experimented with all kinds of cuts and colors (well, all shades of red), and I wish I could be more like her. For some reason I'm just too scared.

    Have you ever tried a diffuser on your hair and do you use gel?
    I looked up diffusers- they go on the end of blowdryers? I always let my hair dry naturally, and never use gel either :tongue: No gel, hairspray, or anything... though I probably should get something to protect my hair from the heat when I straighten it.

    There are times I like my hair, like when I wake up and think I have ok looking waves for once. The bad thing is I can't brush my hair lest it turn into a frizzy mess. Someone on Facebook actually shared an image that shows what it's like for me. Before brushing and after brushing:

    rw8u5to7mp70.jpg

    Before I started straightening my hair, I had a friend who would always ask me why I never brushed my hair. I WAS brushing my hair, but it was coming out looking like the picture on the right!!! (but worse) :tired_face:


    No, you cannot brush curly hair! Your friend clearly did not know what she was talking about.

    And, instead of coloring your hair have you ever considered getting a clear gloss? It doesn't change your color but it adds some body and weight to the hair. Naturally curly hair is a whole different animal and takes practice to see what works for you.
  • ShibaEars
    ShibaEars Posts: 3,928 Member
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    Just_Ceci wrote: »
    I never really considered having children, even when I was going through the whole pre-cana thing pre-marriage. I was all "if it happens, it happens", not thinking it would happen. And I was thinking that mostly because I'd been kind of promiscuous before I met my husband with nary a pregnancy scare. Well, wouldn't you know I got pregnant on my honeymoon. LOL Now, I love my son with all my heart; he is the light of my life. Do I want more? Not even a little bit.

    My husband keeps saying he wants to adopt or foster, so my son will have a brother. I DO NOT want another child. I am 45 years old next week, we live in a tiny house, and honestly, I just don't want to raise another kid. I am satisfied with my small family, even if that means my son is an only. Sometimes I think I'm being selfish, but that's just how I feel.

    Is anyone an only child or have an only child? Am I damaging my kid? :/

    I had my only child at 29. Before that I never wanted kids and never wanted anything to do with anyone else's kids. I got more grief from people after I had one child about not having another. SMDH My daughter is now (reasonably) adjusted 21 year old raising 2 kids of her own. I never regretted not having more kids!

    I was complaining to my friend about this the other day. She does not want kids, I'm still on the fence. But I was saying that no matter how many kids you have (or don't have) people are never happy. Don't have any, people want to know when you're having one. Have one - people want to know when you're having your second. And so on. It's very annoying!
  • ShibaEars
    ShibaEars Posts: 3,928 Member
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    BZAH10 wrote: »
    Pammalla wrote: »
    My hair is straight without the slightest wave to it but my baby has super curly hair and I have no idea how to deal with it. It's not getting longer it's just getting biger

    Curly hair takes time and practice to learn to work with. Do you have a salon you go to? Or a cosmetology school nearby? I'm sure someone would be more than happy to work with you! Probably someone like myself who had/has curly hair and a mother who did nothing with it when I was younger (NOT saying that is you) and would be glad to help someone else so that they don't go through a childhood with bad hair.

    Also, the color of your hair is gorgeous! Love it!

    *NODS* My mom had no idea what to do with my hair, and the internet didn't exist yet so there were many, many mornings I would be in a rage because my hair was being uncooperative, so into a ponytail it went.
  • FluffySandwich
    FluffySandwich Posts: 1,293 Member
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    BZAH10 wrote: »
    Another rather lame confession: I haven't the slightest idea what to do with my hair. I haven't had short hair since I was a baby just starting to grow it. I wish I had the courage to chop it up or do something with it, but I'm just scared of making it look worse. It's extremely wavy (and in my opinion, not the good kind of wavy!!!) and hard to manage, so I just straighten it all the time to make it easier for me to deal with, at least. It also wants to always be parted in the middle. I went to see a hair stylist last year and she told me that my hair was "refusing to be parted down the side." Dumb hair.

    My sister has experimented with all kinds of cuts and colors (well, all shades of red), and I wish I could be more like her. For some reason I'm just too scared.

    Have you ever tried a diffuser on your hair and do you use gel?
    I looked up diffusers- they go on the end of blowdryers? I always let my hair dry naturally, and never use gel either :tongue: No gel, hairspray, or anything... though I probably should get something to protect my hair from the heat when I straighten it.

    There are times I like my hair, like when I wake up and think I have ok looking waves for once. The bad thing is I can't brush my hair lest it turn into a frizzy mess. Someone on Facebook actually shared an image that shows what it's like for me. Before brushing and after brushing:

    rw8u5to7mp70.jpg

    Before I started straightening my hair, I had a friend who would always ask me why I never brushed my hair. I WAS brushing my hair, but it was coming out looking like the picture on the right!!! (but worse) :tired_face:


    No, you cannot brush curly hair! Your friend clearly did not know what she was talking about.

    And, instead of coloring your hair have you ever considered getting a clear gloss? It doesn't change your color but it adds some body and weight to the hair. Naturally curly hair is a whole different animal and takes practice to see what works for you.
    A clear gloss sounds awesome! I should probaby stop straightening my hair... I can't even imagine the damage I'm doing to it. When I last went to visit my mom she told me that she likes my hair curly and gave me some gel to use while I was there. I'd like to experiment with my hair but I'm always afraid of messing it up further. It also tangles like mad :tongue:

    I do LOVE the feeling of getting my hair played with/styled/washed. Anyone in the same boat?

  • ythannah
    ythannah Posts: 4,365 Member
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    Is anyone an only child or have an only child? Am I damaging my kid? :/

    I'm an only child (accident) but my parents are hardly a shining example of proper parenting (see previous confessions) so I think being an only was the least damaging aspect of my upbringing.

    I do wish that I had siblings. Most (although not all) people I know have terrific relationships with their siblings and I envy that.

    However, what I HATE is people who find out you're an only and immediately say, "Oh you must have been sooo spoiled, only children are always spoiled". Yeah. Right.

  • ShibaEars
    ShibaEars Posts: 3,928 Member
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    I confess I am taking my dog to be neutered on Friday. I don't feel bad at all. In fact I am really looking forwards to seeing how many things he walks into while he's wearing the cone of shame.
    (I'm awful I know)

    Nothing wrong with seeing the bright side of a situation :wink:
  • rungirl1973
    rungirl1973 Posts: 2,559 Member
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    ShibaEars wrote: »
    Just_Ceci wrote: »
    I never really considered having children, even when I was going through the whole pre-cana thing pre-marriage. I was all "if it happens, it happens", not thinking it would happen. And I was thinking that mostly because I'd been kind of promiscuous before I met my husband with nary a pregnancy scare. Well, wouldn't you know I got pregnant on my honeymoon. LOL Now, I love my son with all my heart; he is the light of my life. Do I want more? Not even a little bit.

    My husband keeps saying he wants to adopt or foster, so my son will have a brother. I DO NOT want another child. I am 45 years old next week, we live in a tiny house, and honestly, I just don't want to raise another kid. I am satisfied with my small family, even if that means my son is an only. Sometimes I think I'm being selfish, but that's just how I feel.

    Is anyone an only child or have an only child? Am I damaging my kid? :/

    I had my only child at 29. Before that I never wanted kids and never wanted anything to do with anyone else's kids. I got more grief from people after I had one child about not having another. SMDH My daughter is now (reasonably) adjusted 21 year old raising 2 kids of her own. I never regretted not having more kids!

    I was complaining to my friend about this the other day. She does not want kids, I'm still on the fence. But I was saying that no matter how many kids you have (or don't have) people are never happy. Don't have any, people want to know when you're having one. Have one - people want to know when you're having your second. And so on. It's very annoying!

    I hate that! I also hate it when people throw out the platitude, "I never knew what it was like to truly love until I had children" Efffff that!! I have a lot of friends / family that are child-free by choice or by chance and they know how to love just as well as I do! Ugh.
  • fr3smyl
    fr3smyl Posts: 1,418 Member
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    BZAH10 wrote: »
    Another rather lame confession: I haven't the slightest idea what to do with my hair. I haven't had short hair since I was a baby just starting to grow it. I wish I had the courage to chop it up or do something with it, but I'm just scared of making it look worse. It's extremely wavy (and in my opinion, not the good kind of wavy!!!) and hard to manage, so I just straighten it all the time to make it easier for me to deal with, at least. It also wants to always be parted in the middle. I went to see a hair stylist last year and she told me that my hair was "refusing to be parted down the side." Dumb hair.

    My sister has experimented with all kinds of cuts and colors (well, all shades of red), and I wish I could be more like her. For some reason I'm just too scared.

    Have you ever tried a diffuser on your hair and do you use gel?
    I looked up diffusers- they go on the end of blowdryers? I always let my hair dry naturally, and never use gel either :tongue: No gel, hairspray, or anything... though I probably should get something to protect my hair from the heat when I straighten it.

    There are times I like my hair, like when I wake up and think I have ok looking waves for once. The bad thing is I can't brush my hair lest it turn into a frizzy mess. Someone on Facebook actually shared an image that shows what it's like for me. Before brushing and after brushing:

    rw8u5to7mp70.jpg

    Before I started straightening my hair, I had a friend who would always ask me why I never brushed my hair. I WAS brushing my hair, but it was coming out looking like the picture on the right!!! (but worse) :tired_face:


    No, you cannot brush curly hair! Your friend clearly did not know what she was talking about.

    And, instead of coloring your hair have you ever considered getting a clear gloss? It doesn't change your color but it adds some body and weight to the hair. Naturally curly hair is a whole different animal and takes practice to see what works for you.

    So true. So true.
  • FluffySandwich
    FluffySandwich Posts: 1,293 Member
    edited May 2015
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    One of my best friends is an only child and she turned out terrific. Very, very intelligent, witty, and mature. I don't think being an only child makes you damaged at all. I do love my siblings, though... even if sometimes I compare myself to my sister and feel inadequate :lol: (she's beautiful and has the most gorgeous singing voice).
  • tulips_and_tea
    tulips_and_tea Posts: 5,711 Member
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    @Alatariel75 :blush: It just needed to be said...

    Confession #1: I couldn't leave the thread. There has been too much awesome support and too many valid discussions.

    Confession #2: I totally judged @riinbale for their post. Sometimes it is not WHAT you say but HOW you say it and I feel they said it wrong.

    Confession #3: I am happy to report that Dale, the diabetic at my job that I complained about earlier, will now be reporting to Kim(our main staff nurse) for regular monthly check ups and diet education as part of our Employee Health and Wellness and Early Intervention programs at the request of the lieutenant and the insistence of his own girlfriend. While it is not mandatory or remotely required for him to keep his job, I hope he takes full advantage of the opportunity and I am sincerely hoping for improvements in his health and job performance.

    :)

    Actually, @Italian_Buju Your perspective is what made me discuss different options for Dale with the sergeants and then our nurse Kim got involved and that's how we came up with the plan. You made me take a step back and think, "Maybe EVERYONE(even the sergeants who also have diabetes) is being as judgmental as I am and no one has actually considered that he might benefit from some form of REAL support instead of judgmental looks and suggestions."

    We had our monthly meeting and discussed some stuff and Kim said she has an open door and is willing to meet with everyone on a monthly basis so Dale will not be alone in receiving check ups and education on better health. The whole department is able to benefit and hopefully this will lead to less sick days used and more available vacation!

    Well, I am glad you did not leave......I am also an outspoken person and it hit a nerve when it seemed like you were upset that someone was diabetic or that it was not a serious condition (which is how I interpreted your first comment, and I really appreciate that you apologized for that).....I am sensitive about certain subjects (like I have said before), and that is one of them, because I literally spend all day, every day managing my diabetes (I take a MINIMUM of seven insulin injections and test my blood sugar levels about ten times per day).

    And I have had people around me that think it is not a big problem because I do not look sick all the time.

    Meanwhile what they do not know is that it is a full time job to make sure I am not sick all the time, and sometimes even when I do not look sick I am dying inside because of all the long term problems I have because of it, and that I can never just not think of it when doing literally ANYTHING or just grab something quick to eat without making sure I have complex carbs AND protein at once to help slow it down and do the math about how many carbs are in that, subtract any fibre, and half of the sugar alcohol, if any, and then do some division to figure out how many units of insulin I need to inject to offset it, or that I can't even work out without making sure I adjust those numbers for the meal right before my work out and if I forget or do not know I am going to be doing activity in that time period, it makes things way more complicated, AND that I seem to have some kind of doctors appt every single week (this is why I opt for Tuesdays off and work some Saturdays instead, so many appts with all different kinds of DRS)......UGH.....ok rant about diabetes over lol......still glad you are here @lilaclovebird

    I'm so sorry you have to deal with all of that. I do appreciate you taking the time to explain it and shed light on an aspect of this disease that does get overlooked and minimized.
  • Tubbs216
    Tubbs216 Posts: 6,597 Member
    edited May 2015
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    I've fallen off big time lately, and now I'm confused on how to get back. I've looked at the TDEE method but I'm so confused on that, but I can't do the 1200 MFP keeps setting for me. I really don't want to put up a new post about it but may just have to...

    What I've started doing since getting back on track is set my calories to maintenance. Sometimes I'm under by a lot, sometimes a little (or none) but I quite like doing it this way. Makes it more flexible, and sometimes I'm less likely to anack
    Is that just setting MFP to maintain or do you do any calculating? I think I'm going to try that for a bit so I can get a grip on things.
    I've also seen the suggestion of eating at the maintenance for your goal weight (which you'd get from calculating your TDEE then, rather than your current weight). You can then custom set your goals for that number of calories. In theory you should very slowly lose until reaching goal.
    I'm now 12lbs from my goal and considering doing this if I start to struggle, or even just for a little break.
    raelynnsmama - let me know if you need help with the numbers figuring. I have a fairly good grasp on how it all works.
  • girldownsouth
    girldownsouth Posts: 920 Member
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    I've fallen off big time lately, and now I'm confused on how to get back. I've looked at the TDEE method but I'm so confused on that, but I can't do the 1200 MFP keeps setting for me. I really don't want to put up a new post about it but may just have to...

    What I've started doing since getting back on track is set my calories to maintenance. Sometimes I'm under by a lot, sometimes a little (or none) but I quite like doing it this way. Makes it more flexible, and sometimes I'm less likely to anack
    Is that just setting MFP to maintain or do you do any calculating? I think I'm going to try that for a bit so I can get a grip on things.

    I don't know why this keeps cropping the end of things I post! I said I don't snack just because I have the calories.

    I did no calculating, just set it to maintenance and still track my exercise.
  • Tubbs216
    Tubbs216 Posts: 6,597 Member
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    ShibaEars wrote: »
    I confess I am taking my dog to be neutered on Friday. I don't feel bad at all. In fact I am really looking forwards to seeing how many things he walks into while he's wearing the cone of shame.
    (I'm awful I know)

    Nothing wrong with seeing the bright side of a situation :wink:
    Aww, poor puppy. My friend had a cat that she took to get neutered and when they came back he jumped straight off their 5th floor balcony. :o Keep a close eye on him in case he's suicidal - you know what men are like about their bits. Talking of which, I've just made an appointment for my husband to discuss getting neutered.
  • Francl27
    Francl27 Posts: 26,371 Member
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    MoHousdon wrote: »
    Daily confession.

    My husband's daughter's boyfriend broke up with her on Mother's Day and she is "living" with us now. I put living in quotes because since last Tuesday, she's stayed the night once or twice, the rest of the nights (she works evenings) she doesn't bother coming home or even calling to say she's not going to be home. I understand she's an adult being 19, but I also expect her to show us some gratitude and respect for taking her and her cat in when she didn't really have anywhere else to go. Although, she must have SOMEWHERE to sleep since she's not sleeping in our house.

    I am fully miffed about the whole thing because I feel like she is using us to store her stuff and take care of her cat. I have asked my husband to talk to her, but I'm sure he won't since he doesn't like confrontation and she's just now coming into our lives after not being allowed to see us for the past 14 years and he doesn't want to do anything to jeopardize that.

    I am upset and hurt and don't know what to do. :/

    Tough situation but you got to talk to her. Tell her you're really happy to have her with you but if she's going to stay at your place, she needs to take care of her pet and tell you if she's not coming home... I mean, I've never had a roommate but I'd expect them to let me know if they were not coming home for the night too, or I would probably worry...
    I am really upset this morning because my degu is dying, I am sure of it now.....he has almost completely stopped eating and now his fur is falling out.....I was up at 4am hand feeding him corn flakes but have to leave for work now and am terrified he is going to die by himself in his cage while I am not home....I can't stop crying......its gonna be a long day, or few days, every time I have to leave the house.....

    I'm sorry :(
    MoHousdon wrote: »
    I am really upset this morning because my degu is dying, I am sure of it now.....he has almost completely stopped eating and now his fur is falling out.....I was up at 4am hand feeding him corn flakes but have to leave for work now and am terrified he is going to die by himself in his cage while I am not home....I can't stop crying......its gonna be a long day, or few days, every time I have to leave the house.....

    That's just heartbreaking. I'm so sorry. Losing a pet, no matter how or when, is always so hard.

    I have an indoor/outdoor (mostly outdoor) cat that I haven't seen in almost 2 weeks. We live in kind of a wooded area so I think an animal got him. I was thinking something happened last week when I didn't see him, but now that almost a whole week has passed and I still haven't seen him, I'm pretty sure he's gone for good. He was my boy and I'm sad I'll probably never get to hold him again. :'(:'(:'(

    I'm sorry too. My cat disappeared for a while when I moved to the US (I didn't want her to go out but my husband had 3 inside/outside cats so there was no way to just keep her inside). It was awful. My next cats will be indoor cats for sure.


    Confession - I had a huge lunch on purpose, hoping it will keep the hunger at bay until dinner. You know my hormones are wacky when I'm not even craving sweets.
  • m1xm0d3
    m1xm0d3 Posts: 1,576 Member
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    Tubbs216 wrote: »
    ShibaEars wrote: »
    I confess I am taking my dog to be neutered on Friday. I don't feel bad at all. In fact I am really looking forwards to seeing how many things he walks into while he's wearing the cone of shame.
    (I'm awful I know)

    Nothing wrong with seeing the bright side of a situation :wink:
    Aww, poor puppy. My friend had a cat that she took to get neutered and when they came back he jumped straight off their 5th floor balcony. :o Keep a close eye on him in case he's suicidal - you know what men are like about their bits. Talking of which, I've just made an appointment for my husband to discuss getting neutered.

    I did. It's a very simple procedure with zero impact sans a few days recovery. Aside from now shooting blanks, that is. lol
  • rungirl1973
    rungirl1973 Posts: 2,559 Member
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    Tubbs216 wrote: »
    ShibaEars wrote: »
    I confess I am taking my dog to be neutered on Friday. I don't feel bad at all. In fact I am really looking forwards to seeing how many things he walks into while he's wearing the cone of shame.
    (I'm awful I know)

    Nothing wrong with seeing the bright side of a situation :wink:
    Aww, poor puppy. My friend had a cat that she took to get neutered and when they came back he jumped straight off their 5th floor balcony. :o Keep a close eye on him in case he's suicidal - you know what men are like about their bits. Talking of which, I've just made an appointment for my husband to discuss getting neutered.

    LOL! My husband is talking about going back under the knife to undo that. Funny, we can't get on the same page. Way back in the early part of this Confession thread, I think I mentioned that I wanted to have another child with current husband but was probably not going to happen. It's mostly because we're both in our 40's (I'm 41, he's 44) and he'd had the V before we met. I decided it wasn't worth it and dropped it. Now, he's talking about going to the doctor and discussing options. Ha!