Husband sabotage
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so because the wife is on a diet the husband can't bring home some donuts, really???
I'm with the OP on this.
Hubby can chow down on doughnuts all day while he's at work or stuff his face while driving home.
Bringing them home shows a lack of respect for his wife and indeed belies his professed support for his wife's efforts. Either that or he's simply an insensitive dolt that can't think obvious things through.
Eating his lump of flour, fat, and sugar elsewhere is not a hardship for the hub-meister.0 -
So. I'd be pissed if someone asked me to do something in the middle of my workout. I set time aside- leave me alone. I do morning pages in the morning- I expect him to leave me alone to write for 20 minutes- we are all adults- not toddlers- if you can't leave your spouse/significant other alone for 20-60 minutes you need to do some re-evaluating.
Secondly- he didn't sabotage you.
Thirdly- I wouldn't even bring it up at all- just make the changes and manage your food and general diet yourself.
Skip the "frank conversations" just don't talk about it and do what you need to do. It doesn't need to be a huge life altering choice- you aren't having a baby- you're just changing your diet.
I only tell mine what I"m doing so he understands why I chose not to eat something or eat extra somethings. If I'm cutting I'm more fussy- if I'm bulking- I eat all the things and then he complains I spend to much on food. We don't talk about him supporting me or not. I don't care if he supports me. I'm doing it for me. His opinion on it matters very little in the long run.
Also he gets to touch my butt- and he likes that- so he can't complain to much anyway. The leverage that comes with a sweet squat booty is powerful.0 -
so because the wife is on a diet the husband can't bring home some donuts, really???
I'm with the OP on this.
Hubby can chow down on doughnuts all day while he's at work or stuff his face while driving home.
Bringing them home shows a lack of respect for his wife and indeed belies his professed support for his wife's efforts. Either that or he's simply an insensitive dolt that can't think obvious things through.
Eating his lump of flour, fat, and sugar elsewhere is not a hardship for the hub-meister.
I would consider having to eat out in the car like a kid in the 'time out' corner to be a hardship. And not everyone works in an office where they can chow down all day; my hubby works in a shop where there's no food allowed on the floor. I wouldn't dream of telling my husband he can't eat his favorite foods in the comfort of his own home.0 -
A guide to identifying sabotage
Scenario A:
Someone eats donuts in front of you.
Scenario B:
Someone force feeds you donuts against your will, or pours lard into your stomach via a feeding tube while you're sleeping.
Scenario B is sabotage. Scenario A is not.
Scenario A:
Someone asks you do something while you're working out in a common area.
Scenario B:
Someone comes in and forcibly stops you any time you exercise.
Scenario B is sabotage. Scenario A is not.
Is failing to have self control called sabotage?0 -
so because the wife is on a diet the husband can't bring home some donuts, really???
I'm with the OP on this.
Hubby can chow down on doughnuts all day while he's at work or stuff his face while driving home.
Bringing them home shows a lack of respect for his wife and indeed belies his professed support for his wife's efforts. Either that or he's simply an insensitive dolt that can't think obvious things through.
Eating his lump of flour, fat, and sugar elsewhere is not a hardship for the hub-meister.
Isn't it his house too? So if you work in an office setting others should also avoid bringing in cakes, cookies, doughnuts etc. because someone has decided to change THEIR diet? No. If you have decided to change YOUR diet to lose weight then its called showing some will power. Don't impose on others.0 -
so because the wife is on a diet the husband can't bring home some donuts, really???
I'm with the OP on this.
Hubby can chow down on doughnuts all day while he's at work or stuff his face while driving home.
Bringing them home shows a lack of respect for his wife and indeed belies his professed support for his wife's efforts. Either that or he's simply an insensitive dolt that can't think obvious things through.
Eating his lump of flour, fat, and sugar elsewhere is not a hardship for the hub-meister.
It's his home also!! He has the right to eat where he wants to!!!!!0 -
so because the wife is on a diet the husband can't bring home some donuts, really???
I'm with the OP on this.
Hubby can chow down on doughnuts all day while he's at work or stuff his face while driving home.
Bringing them home shows a lack of respect for his wife and indeed belies his professed support for his wife's efforts. Either that or he's simply an insensitive dolt that can't think obvious things through.
Eating his lump of flour, fat, and sugar elsewhere is not a hardship for the hub-meister.
wut? really? So husband can work all day to pay the mortgage and bills on his house, but he can't bring the foods he likes into a home that he owns half of????
you can't be serious...0 -
so because the wife is on a diet the husband can't bring home some donuts, really???
I'm with the OP on this.
Hubby can chow down on doughnuts all day while he's at work or stuff his face while driving home.
Bringing them home shows a lack of respect for his wife and indeed belies his professed support for his wife's efforts. Either that or he's simply an insensitive dolt that can't think obvious things through.
Eating his lump of flour, fat, and sugar elsewhere is not a hardship for the hub-meister.
Don't you think that there might be better solutions?
So she tells him to go eat his donuts in the car...what if he says "I will if you agree to do your Zumba in the car.".
Doing Zumba in the car is possible...search youtube and there are several videos for seated Zumba.
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TheVirgoddess wrote: »My husband still brings me donuts. Because I like donuts and he loves me. My "diet" is my business to manage - not his. It's not sabotage. It's realizing that the world doesn't actually revolve around me.
I like this one best .0 -
so because the wife is on a diet the husband can't bring home some donuts, really???
I'm with the OP on this.
Hubby can chow down on doughnuts all day while he's at work or stuff his face while driving home.
Bringing them home shows a lack of respect for his wife and indeed belies his professed support for his wife's efforts. Either that or he's simply an insensitive dolt that can't think obvious things through.
Eating his lump of flour, fat, and sugar elsewhere is not a hardship for the hub-meister.
Very bad quality you show in this post.
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so because the wife is on a diet the husband can't bring home some donuts, really???
If someone has self control issues with item X, it's not very helpful when people bring that item around you. Nobody wants to have their noses rubbed in what they are trying to avoid but love to indulge in.
Eventually, maybe, they will be able to tolerate being around donuts without eating them. Or maybe they will have enough calories in their daily allotment to devote 500 calories to an ice cream cone or 200 calories for a donut, along with the willpower to stop at just one.
But a lot of people are not there right now. I wish people would stop the false incredulity as if this was a difficult situation to understand.0 -
maillemaker wrote: »so because the wife is on a diet the husband can't bring home some donuts, really???
If someone has self control issues with item X, it's not very helpful when people bring that item around you. Nobody wants to have their noses rubbed in what they are trying to avoid but love to indulge in.
Eventually, maybe, they will be able to tolerate being around donuts without eating them. Or maybe they will have enough calories in their daily allotment to devote 500 calories to an ice cream cone or 200 calories for a donut, along with the willpower to stop at just one.
But a lot of people are not there right now. I wish people would stop the false incredulity as if this was a difficult situation to understand.
so the husband has to hide all the foods he likes in the car, and can't eat them in his house?
and OP has indicated absolutely zero binging disorder, so for you to assume that is the care here is 1000% off base.
these threads always amaze me ..if relationships are a 50/50 deal why is it OK for the wife to tell him to stop eating everything he likes because she wants to lose weight????0 -
maillemaker wrote: »so because the wife is on a diet the husband can't bring home some donuts, really???
If someone has self control issues with item X, it's not very helpful when people bring that item around you. Nobody wants to have their noses rubbed in what they are trying to avoid but love to indulge in.
Eventually, maybe, they will be able to tolerate being around donuts without eating them. Or maybe they will have enough calories in their daily allotment to devote 500 calories to an ice cream cone or 200 calories for a donut, along with the willpower to stop at just one.
But a lot of people are not there right now. I wish people would stop the false incredulity as if this was a difficult situation to understand.
So he should never have any kind of foods he likes because she is on a diet?!?!
I do the grocery shopping and when I was losing weight, I still bought my boys and hubby foods they like!! They don't have to be on the diet, I am, I can either work those foods in or don't have them at all!!!!!0 -
I'm sure you two can find common ground. Maybe give him a bread box for his treats. As said before, you can also schedule a treat into your plan and enjoy them together. Or, think about what motivates your husband. Even if he is not dieting, he might want to become healthier. My husband was a sweet JUNKIE, but he is also frugal. I showed him how much money we can save if we don't buy cookies. He was posting his calories and exercise on MFP by sundown.
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maillemaker wrote: »so because the wife is on a diet the husband can't bring home some donuts, really???
If someone has self control issues with item X, it's not very helpful when people bring that item around you. Nobody wants to have their noses rubbed in what they are trying to avoid but love to indulge in.
Eventually, maybe, they will be able to tolerate being around donuts without eating them. Or maybe they will have enough calories in their daily allotment to devote 500 calories to an ice cream cone or 200 calories for a donut, along with the willpower to stop at just one.
But a lot of people are not there right now. I wish people would stop the false incredulity as if this was a difficult situation to understand.
so the husband has to hide all the foods he likes in the car, and can't eat them in his house?
and OP has indicated absolutely zero binging disorder, so for you to assume that is the care here is 1000% off base.
these threads always amaze me ..if relationships are a 50/50 deal why is it OK for the wife to tell him to stop eating everything he likes because she wants to lose weight????
50/50 don't be silly. Happy wife happy life. Any sayings you have with the husband?
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It took me a lot to adjust to the idea that me and my bf's worlds don't revolve around one another. If they did, we'd both have pretty unhealthy habits by leaning on one another to eat too much, snack too much, drink too much etc...
Now that I've made definitive guidelines for *myself* regarding what's going to fit into my cals for the day, my bf doesn't have any control over what I consume... whether he brings home a bag of candy or wants Chinese food for dinner. He can do those things. I have my own plan already set and I stick to it. It took months of getting used to for me, but I feel much healthier and more independent.0 -
so because the wife is on a diet the husband can't bring home some donuts, really???
I'm with the OP on this.
Hubby can chow down on doughnuts all day while he's at work or stuff his face while driving home.
Bringing them home shows a lack of respect for his wife and indeed belies his professed support for his wife's efforts. Either that or he's simply an insensitive dolt that can't think obvious things through.
Eating his lump of flour, fat, and sugar elsewhere is not a hardship for the hub-meister.
how is bringing home food a lack of respect? taunting her by going- oh little piggey you can't have your doughnuts I'll eat them for you"
that's a lack of respect.
My BF brings home crap all the time when he visits- I just don't eat them. Like the poptarts above the fridge- they stay above the fridge- he eats them when he wants them- I just leave them alone.
Insulting a man you don't know calling him a dolt because he likes doughnuts is damn rude.0 -
My house is divided. Good healthy stuff on my side; bad yet wonderfully delicious snacks and sweets on my wife’s side. Talk about willpower! Do I grab some raw broccoli or join my wife in finishing off the remaining M&M’s from the candy jar? Does that make her an evil, evil person? Yes!0
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