DEAR FAT PEOPLE

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Replies

  • rhyolite_
    rhyolite_ Posts: 188 Member
    JaneiR36 wrote: »
    rhyolite_ wrote: »
    Yes tomatoey, pathetic is the word. Just because something is a societal norm doesn't mean you aren't f***ing up. Healthcare, access to information, and availability of cheap healthy food are all at virtually an all time high in this country. Just because we have more entertaining sedentary activities and some ridiculously unhealthy food choices doesn't make people blameless. If you didn't know that ice cream cake and the new bacon wrapped bacon, butter, cheese, and bacon sandwich were unhealthy than you aren't very bright. This is why our country is falling behind because we just sit there and play the victim and act like it's some kind of patriotic freedom to be gluttonous, lazy, and ignorant. This is not meant to be an attack on obese people, everyone has their reasons and struggles but to act like it's not their fault because of society is like saying i literally can't go to the movies without checking facebook during the show.

    While I don't agree with everything tomatoey has posted, I do know that no one is saying that obese people have no responsibility for their condition, only that there are larger, social structures at play to consider. Society and psychology have their part in the discussion - it doesn't mean that we absolve someone of their personal responsibility, only that we acknowledge human struggle. After all, can't we better help people to get well and stay well if we understand all the factors that made them unwell? Approaching it purely from a "you did this to yourself, now pull yourself up" approach (while absolutely true) doesn't seem to help the majority.

    More like, "you did this to yourself, so you have the power to undo it"

    I see nothing about what I said that prohibits the person having power to undo it? Not to mention the sentence you quoted has a disclaimer stating that I agree with the general sentiment - just not the approach. I'm not sure what your disagreement with my post is. If you've read anything I've posted, I am firmly in the camp of understanding all variables so you can best help the person help themselves. If you have no interest in helping and just want to tell people they are responsible, that's also fine. My training is in clinical research, so I would prefer to see the whole picture (or as much of it as possible) to find the best approach/method.
  • rhyolite_
    rhyolite_ Posts: 188 Member
    Yeah, i mean we pretty much agree, just a couple of the things she said kind of set me off. I just really hate blaming society to even a small degree for this or anything, people are responsible for their own actions. I'm mostly a bleeding heart liberal but that's one issue where i'm very conservative. In some ways modern society makes it easier to be obese but in virtually every practical way it's easier than ever to not be.

    You're right - I think we are mostly in agreement. I can appreciate the frustration at having people blame society, because that is unfortunately very prevalent also.
  • urloved33
    urloved33 Posts: 3,323 Member
    I have read a few posts on each page and fail to see one thing pointed out...over eating, like drinking drugging smoking is just another way we *as people* self medicate. Is it possible to think that NOT TALKING ABOUT IT keeps us *as people* where we are ...we are as sick as our secrets. These addictions need attention and although I don't agree with meanness about them...I do agree we need to talk about and address the ways we use food drugs booze smoking etc to self medicate. I did NOT watch the video there was no need to the feedback was enough to help me to choose not too watch it. I get the feeling the video is like a train wreck you can't NOT WATCH. rubberneckers cause traffic jams...look at the amount of posts about this crazy video. apparently we love reality tv .............and videos!
  • Traveler120
    Traveler120 Posts: 712 Member
    Fat people are becoming a force to be reckonned with. They are after all 70% of America. You can't say boo without some backlash. One of these days, the tables will turn and it's us the skinny (ie. normal sized) minority who will start to be concerned. If I'm going for an interview and my interviewer is really overweight, should I even begin to entertain any concerns that my relative thinness will be a disadvantage? Especially after she's recently watched the dear fat people video and feelings are still a bit raw? I hope I'm just being ridiculous to think this could become an actual thing.
  • Noelv1976
    Noelv1976 Posts: 18,948 Member
    Ah dang. There's a McDonald's over there. I know I'm 350 pounds, but they make some awesome burgers. yes my heart aches, yes I have high blood pressure, yes my ankles are swollen, yes I have a hard time getting out of bed in the morning, but who cares!! I can get two Whoppers for the price of one salad! So it's McDonalds fault for making burgers cheap and salads expensive! That's why I'm fat. Say what?? I can upgrade to a large for only a fifty cents!! Hell yeah!!
  • buffalobill41
    buffalobill41 Posts: 72 Member
    oh and the video sucks. not even talking about the mean content or whatever. it's just poorly paced, not funny and poorly made in general. she is not an entertaining person.
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  • Traveler120
    Traveler120 Posts: 712 Member
    Noelv1976 wrote: »
    Ah dang. There's a McDonald's over there. I know I'm 350 pounds, but they make some awesome burgers. yes my heart aches, yes I have high blood pressure, yes my ankles are swollen, yes I have a hard time getting out of bed in the morning, but who cares!! I can get two Whoppers for the price of one salad! So it's McDonalds fault for making burgers cheap and salads expensive! That's why I'm fat. Say what?? I can upgrade to a large for only a fifty cents!! Hell yeah!!
    Hahaha! but you don't know me. I could be on a weight loss plan, you don't know if I was 500, maybe it's my 'cheat day' and my whopper 'fits my macros'. Maybe it's the heart meds and diabetes and blood pressure meds that are making me fat. You don't know. Have you seen my family? It's genetics! And also hormones, which are probably jacked up coz I'm fat but still....the point is, you don't know, so you can't judge and fat-shame me. You're not with me 24-7 seeing how hard I try and all the diets I've tried.....et cetera, et cetera...
  • urloved33
    urloved33 Posts: 3,323 Member
    Fat people are becoming a force to be reckonned with. They are after all 70% of America. You can't say boo without some backlash. One of these days, the tables will turn and it's us the skinny (ie. normal sized) minority who will start to be concerned. If I'm going for an interview and my interviewer is really overweight, should I even begin to entertain any concerns that my relative thinness will be a disadvantage? Especially after she's recently watched the dear fat people video and feelings are still a bit raw? I hope I'm just being ridiculous to think this could become an actual thing.

    o I absolutely agree. the promotions in my office by and large fit a profile. large

  • misterdale67
    misterdale67 Posts: 171 Member
    Noelv1976 wrote: »
    Ah dang. There's a McDonald's over there. I know I'm 350 pounds, but they make some awesome burgers. yes my heart aches, yes I have high blood pressure, yes my ankles are swollen, yes I have a hard time getting out of bed in the morning, but who cares!! I can get two Whoppers for the price of one salad! So it's McDonalds fault for making burgers cheap and salads expensive! That's why I'm fat. Say what?? I can upgrade to a large for only a fifty cents!! Hell yeah!!

    This has me ROARING with laughter! Thanks!!
  • melodicraven
    melodicraven Posts: 83 Member
    Noelv1976 wrote: »
    Ah dang. There's a McDonald's over there. I know I'm 350 pounds, but they make some awesome burgers. yes my heart aches, yes I have high blood pressure, yes my ankles are swollen, yes I have a hard time getting out of bed in the morning, but who cares!! I can get two Whoppers for the price of one salad! So it's McDonalds fault for making burgers cheap and salads expensive! That's why I'm fat. Say what?? I can upgrade to a large for only a fifty cents!! Hell yeah!!

    Tsk, tsk. First off - you get Whoppers from Burger King, not McD's. McD's has Big Macs. And it's .99 to upgrade to large, not .50. That just covers a measly medium.

    But on that note, mmmmm whoppers.... You know you want The King.
    abn15wewx1k7.jpg

  • chaoticdreams
    chaoticdreams Posts: 447 Member
    Noelv1976 wrote: »
    Ah dang. There's a McDonald's over there. I know I'm 350 pounds, but they make some awesome burgers. yes my heart aches, yes I have high blood pressure, yes my ankles are swollen, yes I have a hard time getting out of bed in the morning, but who cares!! I can get two Whoppers for the price of one salad! So it's McDonalds fault for making burgers cheap and salads expensive! That's why I'm fat. Say what?? I can upgrade to a large for only a fifty cents!! Hell yeah!!

    Tsk, tsk. First off - you get Whoppers from Burger King, not McD's. McD's has Big Macs. And it's .99 to upgrade to large, not .50. That just covers a measly medium.

    But on that note, mmmmm whoppers.... You know you want The King.
    abn15wewx1k7.jpg

    LOL

    Yes, I so want the king. Sooo smexy! (sarcasm)
  • tomatoey
    tomatoey Posts: 5,446 Member
    Yeah, i mean we pretty much agree, just a couple of the things she said kind of set me off. I just really hate blaming society to even a small degree for this or anything, people are responsible for their own actions. I'm mostly a bleeding heart liberal but that's one issue where i'm very conservative. In some ways modern society makes it easier to be obese but in virtually every practical way it's easier than ever to not be.

    If it helps you to think that way, ok. Good luck to you.
  • tomatoey
    tomatoey Posts: 5,446 Member
    edited September 2015
    Yes tomatoey, pathetic is the word. Just because something is a societal norm doesn't mean you aren't f***ing up. Healthcare, access to information, and availability of cheap healthy food are all at virtually an all time high in this country. Just because we have more entertaining sedentary activities and some ridiculously unhealthy food choices doesn't make people blameless. If you didn't know that ice cream cake and the new bacon wrapped bacon, butter, cheese, and bacon sandwich were unhealthy than you aren't very bright. This is why our country is falling behind because we just sit there and play the victim and act like it's some kind of patriotic freedom to be gluttonous, lazy, and ignorant. This is not meant to be an attack on obese people, everyone has their reasons and struggles but to act like it's not their fault because of society is like saying i literally can't go to the movies without checking facebook during the show.

    That is not why your country is falling behind, lol

    Also why have you named yourself after a fictional serial killer
  • tomatoey
    tomatoey Posts: 5,446 Member
    JaneiR36 wrote: »
    rhyolite_ wrote: »
    Yes tomatoey, pathetic is the word. Just because something is a societal norm doesn't mean you aren't f***ing up. Healthcare, access to information, and availability of cheap healthy food are all at virtually an all time high in this country. Just because we have more entertaining sedentary activities and some ridiculously unhealthy food choices doesn't make people blameless. If you didn't know that ice cream cake and the new bacon wrapped bacon, butter, cheese, and bacon sandwich were unhealthy than you aren't very bright. This is why our country is falling behind because we just sit there and play the victim and act like it's some kind of patriotic freedom to be gluttonous, lazy, and ignorant. This is not meant to be an attack on obese people, everyone has their reasons and struggles but to act like it's not their fault because of society is like saying i literally can't go to the movies without checking facebook during the show.

    While I don't agree with everything tomatoey has posted, I do know that no one is saying that obese people have no responsibility for their condition, only that there are larger, social structures at play to consider. Society and psychology have their part in the discussion - it doesn't mean that we absolve someone of their personal responsibility, only that we acknowledge human struggle. After all, can't we better help people to get well and stay well if we understand all the factors that made them unwell? Approaching it purely from a "you did this to yourself, now pull yourself up" approach (while absolutely true) doesn't seem to help the majority.

    More like, "you did this to yourself, so you have the power to undo it"

    What about, "now that you have the required knowledge and skills, you have the power to undo the effects of this complex phenomenon on your body"
  • mccindy72
    mccindy72 Posts: 7,001 Member
    tomatoey wrote: »
    JaneiR36 wrote: »
    rhyolite_ wrote: »
    Yes tomatoey, pathetic is the word. Just because something is a societal norm doesn't mean you aren't f***ing up. Healthcare, access to information, and availability of cheap healthy food are all at virtually an all time high in this country. Just because we have more entertaining sedentary activities and some ridiculously unhealthy food choices doesn't make people blameless. If you didn't know that ice cream cake and the new bacon wrapped bacon, butter, cheese, and bacon sandwich were unhealthy than you aren't very bright. This is why our country is falling behind because we just sit there and play the victim and act like it's some kind of patriotic freedom to be gluttonous, lazy, and ignorant. This is not meant to be an attack on obese people, everyone has their reasons and struggles but to act like it's not their fault because of society is like saying i literally can't go to the movies without checking facebook during the show.

    While I don't agree with everything tomatoey has posted, I do know that no one is saying that obese people have no responsibility for their condition, only that there are larger, social structures at play to consider. Society and psychology have their part in the discussion - it doesn't mean that we absolve someone of their personal responsibility, only that we acknowledge human struggle. After all, can't we better help people to get well and stay well if we understand all the factors that made them unwell? Approaching it purely from a "you did this to yourself, now pull yourself up" approach (while absolutely true) doesn't seem to help the majority.

    More like, "you did this to yourself, so you have the power to undo it"

    What about, "now that you have the required knowledge and skills, you have the power to undo the effects of this complex phenomenon on your body"

    It's not complex. Too much food goes in, person becomes overweight. Simple.
  • MelodyandBarbells
    MelodyandBarbells Posts: 7,724 Member
    tomatoey wrote: »
    JaneiR36 wrote: »
    rhyolite_ wrote: »
    Yes tomatoey, pathetic is the word. Just because something is a societal norm doesn't mean you aren't f***ing up. Healthcare, access to information, and availability of cheap healthy food are all at virtually an all time high in this country. Just because we have more entertaining sedentary activities and some ridiculously unhealthy food choices doesn't make people blameless. If you didn't know that ice cream cake and the new bacon wrapped bacon, butter, cheese, and bacon sandwich were unhealthy than you aren't very bright. This is why our country is falling behind because we just sit there and play the victim and act like it's some kind of patriotic freedom to be gluttonous, lazy, and ignorant. This is not meant to be an attack on obese people, everyone has their reasons and struggles but to act like it's not their fault because of society is like saying i literally can't go to the movies without checking facebook during the show.

    While I don't agree with everything tomatoey has posted, I do know that no one is saying that obese people have no responsibility for their condition, only that there are larger, social structures at play to consider. Society and psychology have their part in the discussion - it doesn't mean that we absolve someone of their personal responsibility, only that we acknowledge human struggle. After all, can't we better help people to get well and stay well if we understand all the factors that made them unwell? Approaching it purely from a "you did this to yourself, now pull yourself up" approach (while absolutely true) doesn't seem to help the majority.

    More like, "you did this to yourself, so you have the power to undo it"

    What about, "now that you have the required knowledge and skills, you have the power to undo the effects of this complex phenomenon on your body"

    It's not for me, because I do not believe the knowledge and skills are all that elusive :) But I see where you're coming from
  • buffalobill41
    buffalobill41 Posts: 72 Member
    Society made me name myself after a fictional serial killer, just like it is responsible for all of my problems. You still haven't actually explained your theory behind this.
  • jgnatca
    jgnatca Posts: 14,464 Member
    The head of my weight loss clinic has weighed in on the comments made on this video.

    http://globalnews.ca/news/2213280/dear-fat-shamers-dispelling-obesity-myths/
  • tomatoey
    tomatoey Posts: 5,446 Member
    Society made me name myself after a fictional serial killer, just like it is responsible for all of my problems. You still haven't actually explained your theory behind this.

    You're so charming
  • tomatoey
    tomatoey Posts: 5,446 Member
    Society made me name myself after a fictional serial killer, just like it is responsible for all of my problems. You still haven't actually explained your theory behind this.

    A number of explanations exist, these are not my theories. You can look into "causes of obesity" if you're at all interested.
  • justrollme
    justrollme Posts: 802 Member
    jgnatca wrote: »
    The head of my weight loss clinic has weighed in on the comments made on this video.

    http://globalnews.ca/news/2213280/dear-fat-shamers-dispelling-obesity-myths/

    While reading this, my first thought was that it comes across professional and sensible. However, I also thought that this reply is made by someone who is making his living by treating those who are suffering with obesity, and perhaps that is why I also had a sense that all of his counter-points seem (to me) to suggest an absolution of obese people from all personal contributions and responsibilities, regarding their health and weight.

    I'll be the first to admit, though, that this is probably my perception due to my own experiences with very close (and very important) family members who are obese, unhealthy, medicated, suffering, yet cling to articles such as this one. The family member I am thinking of, after having a heart-to-heart talk about fears and worries about his health (which is diet-related) has actually handed me print articles of this exact nature, and said, "See? I can't help it." But yes, he can help it. He won't help it, and it is killing him, which will absolutely tear apart our family.

    I'm not supporting fat-shaming (or any kind of shaming, for that matter) in any way, however, I think swinging too far towards enabling is just as detrimental.
  • LBuehrle8
    LBuehrle8 Posts: 4,044 Member
    justrollme wrote: »
    jgnatca wrote: »
    The head of my weight loss clinic has weighed in on the comments made on this video.

    http://globalnews.ca/news/2213280/dear-fat-shamers-dispelling-obesity-myths/

    While reading this, my first thought was that it comes across professional and sensible. However, I also thought that this reply is made by someone who is making his living by treating those who are suffering with obesity, and perhaps that is why I also had a sense that all of his counter-points seem (to me) to suggest an absolution of obese people from all personal contributions and responsibilities, regarding their health and weight.

    I'll be the first to admit, though, that this is probably my perception due to my own experiences with very close (and very important) family members who are obese, unhealthy, medicated, suffering, yet cling to articles such as this one. The family member I am thinking of, after having a heart-to-heart talk about fears and worries about his health (which is diet-related) has actually handed me print articles of this exact nature, and said, "See? I can't help it." But yes, he can help it. He won't help it, and it is killing him, which will absolutely tear apart our family.

    I'm not supporting fat-shaming (or any kind of shaming, for that matter) in any way, however, I think swinging too far towards enabling is just as detrimental.

    I read the article and thought the exact same thing! I was very confused with the comparison to depression, didn't jive with me personally. Anyway you said everything I was thinking much better than I ever could have.
  • buffalobill41
    buffalobill41 Posts: 72 Member
    If you don't have the info that's fine.
  • snikkins
    snikkins Posts: 1,282 Member
    justrollme wrote: »
    jgnatca wrote: »
    The head of my weight loss clinic has weighed in on the comments made on this video.

    http://globalnews.ca/news/2213280/dear-fat-shamers-dispelling-obesity-myths/

    While reading this, my first thought was that it comes across professional and sensible. However, I also thought that this reply is made by someone who is making his living by treating those who are suffering with obesity, and perhaps that is why I also had a sense that all of his counter-points seem (to me) to suggest an absolution of obese people from all personal contributions and responsibilities, regarding their health and weight.

    I'll be the first to admit, though, that this is probably my perception due to my own experiences with very close (and very important) family members who are obese, unhealthy, medicated, suffering, yet cling to articles such as this one. The family member I am thinking of, after having a heart-to-heart talk about fears and worries about his health (which is diet-related) has actually handed me print articles of this exact nature, and said, "See? I can't help it." But yes, he can help it. He won't help it, and it is killing him, which will absolutely tear apart our family.

    I'm not supporting fat-shaming (or any kind of shaming, for that matter) in any way, however, I think swinging too far towards enabling is just as detrimental.

    I agree that the statements in under "Myth #1" seemed a little light on the personal responsibility side, but I'm hoping it was from the cutting out of certain things from the interview to make it coherent. I can easily see where someone would make that argument, but I think he was getting at that it can be a little more complicated than eat less, move more when you're having to figure out something like thyroid levels, for instance.

    Of course, this will be a minority of the general population, but worth noting, I think. But at the end of the day, after the thyroid levels and meds are figured out, it is eat less and move more!

  • tomatoey
    tomatoey Posts: 5,446 Member
    If you don't have the info that's fine.

    I'm not interested in educating a hostile 28 y/o man who named himself after a fictional serial killer. The information is out there, find it if you're curious.
  • snikkins
    snikkins Posts: 1,282 Member
    tomatoey wrote: »
    If you don't have the info that's fine.

    I'm not interested in educating a hostile 28 y/o man who named himself after a fictional serial killer. The information is out there, find it if you're curious.

    I'm just going to throw out there that Buffalo Bill was also the guy known for "Wild West" shows. So, not just a fictional serial killer.

  • tomatoey
    tomatoey Posts: 5,446 Member
    Didn't realize i was so hostile, i'll ease it back. So to summarize you're right, i'm wrong and there's information out there somewhere on the internet that proves it you just don't want to show me? Sounds good, oh and are you a size 14?

    I am 5'7" tall, 135 lbs, size 4-6 in mall stores.
  • tomatoey
    tomatoey Posts: 5,446 Member
    snikkins wrote: »
    tomatoey wrote: »
    If you don't have the info that's fine.

    I'm not interested in educating a hostile 28 y/o man who named himself after a fictional serial killer. The information is out there, find it if you're curious.

    I'm just going to throw out there that Buffalo Bill was also the guy known for "Wild West" shows. So, not just a fictional serial killer.

    Yeah, I guess that's a possible inspiration. Doubt it
  • MelodyandBarbells
    MelodyandBarbells Posts: 7,724 Member
    This just got weird