DEAR FAT PEOPLE
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chaoticdreams wrote: »I had a diabetic mother and was born 11 lbs 12 oz, I was sort of destined to be big, and no not saying that caused me to be fat later on in life.
I'm thinking that is probably not how it works. My son was 11 lbs when he was born. Part of the reason I only had 1
Natural childbirth and all.
But he is a quite healthy 6'3'' normal weight/musculature law enforcement officer. He has never been overweight. His weight at birth did not create some 'destiny' where he would be overweight.
It would be rather interesting for someone to do a study on birth weight in correlation to lifetime weight/obesity. There might be one but I'm too lazy to look for it.
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the fat cells we have ARE passed on to our children.0
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chaoticdreams wrote: »
The MFP forums, in my experience, are full of what I consider "tough love". When someone makes a post "I'm not losing, CICO doesn't work, etc etc", they are often served a harsh dose of reality that they simply aren't doing it right. Often times, excuses are just that - excuses. And I've also seen plenty of posts where those that have had success have come back to thank those folks who gave them that reality check. The people on this forum have personal experience and a lot of knowledge, and they are trying to help those folks who clearly don't understand the process or are refusing to make the changes that are required to be successful. Some might call them "mean", but they aren't shaming, they are just being honest.
Those are not the people I refer too. Tough love is sometimes very necessary and I do agree 90% of the time people are not losing because they aren't being honest in their logging. The ones I refer to are those that very obviously have an issue with obesity and make comments toward it. There are several in this thread alone.
I think this is pretty weird too. Presumably people here either are trying to lose weight or have already, and don't think it's great to just be fat, so I don't know why some seem to think it's important to convince us that being fat is terrible. (And maybe it's a matter of different subcultures, but I never felt like society was telling me that it was great to be fat when I was fat or that I needed to be woken up to why it was bad to be fat. I would have lied and said I didn't mind being fat, but of course I did, and knew I should change it.)0 -
chaoticdreams wrote: »
The MFP forums, in my experience, are full of what I consider "tough love". When someone makes a post "I'm not losing, CICO doesn't work, etc etc", they are often served a harsh dose of reality that they simply aren't doing it right. Often times, excuses are just that - excuses. And I've also seen plenty of posts where those that have had success have come back to thank those folks who gave them that reality check. The people on this forum have personal experience and a lot of knowledge, and they are trying to help those folks who clearly don't understand the process or are refusing to make the changes that are required to be successful. Some might call them "mean", but they aren't shaming, they are just being honest.
Those are not the people I refer too. Tough love is sometimes very necessary and I do agree 90% of the time people are not losing because they aren't being honest in their logging. The ones I refer to are those that very obviously have an issue with obesity and make comments toward it. There are several in this thread alone.
Tough love and fat shaming are too completely different things, I agree. I live firmly in the tough love camp. I do see fat shaming is absolutely prevalent on these forums and I'd even go as far as accepted by those who moderate this forum.
I understand why people may do it, even though I still find it reprehensible. People here are often in the midst of making changes. They tend to have mentality of....I can make the changes, you can too. That may be true, but it may not.
I am nobody special. I was obese, then overweight and now I am a healthy body weight. True. If I can do it, anyone can. However fat shaming someone or mocking their excuses IMO helps no one. What I also recognize is that while I can do it and did it...and I am nobody special....I also didn't do it for a long time. For a long time it did seem like something I couldn't do. There are reasons. They are mine. They are also probably excuses, doesn't make them invalid. So, I recognize that this is a journey and everyone is at a different point with a different story.
I also know fat shaming was never my motivation. It never helped. If anything it made it worse. So, when I see fat shaming and it being referenced as trying to help....I call BS and call it fast.
All of this.0 -
This girl is proud to be large and in charge... Like that one poster above wrote "fat people are becoming a force to be reckoned with"
I'm sure she'll have her own reality tv show:
https://www.facebook.com/fitness.robert/videos/991780324190276/?fref=nf
Thanks for the video link. I threw up in my mouth a little bit. So gross. I couldn't listen to the video cause I am at work but just the sight of her dipping her burger in what I can only guess is a shake make me lose my appetite.-4 -
+1chaoticdreams wrote: »
The MFP forums, in my experience, are full of what I consider "tough love". When someone makes a post "I'm not losing, CICO doesn't work, etc etc", they are often served a harsh dose of reality that they simply aren't doing it right. Often times, excuses are just that - excuses. And I've also seen plenty of posts where those that have had success have come back to thank those folks who gave them that reality check. The people on this forum have personal experience and a lot of knowledge, and they are trying to help those folks who clearly don't understand the process or are refusing to make the changes that are required to be successful. Some might call them "mean", but they aren't shaming, they are just being honest.
Those are not the people I refer too. Tough love is sometimes very necessary and I do agree 90% of the time people are not losing because they aren't being honest in their logging. The ones I refer to are those that very obviously have an issue with obesity and make comments toward it. There are several in this thread alone.
Tough love and fat shaming are too completely different things, I agree. I live firmly in the tough love camp. I do see fat shaming is absolutely prevalent on these forums and I'd even go as far as accepted by those who moderate this forum.
I understand why people may do it, even though I still find it reprehensible. People here are often in the midst of making changes. They tend to have mentality of....I can make the changes, you can too. That may be true, but it may not.
I am nobody special. I was obese, then overweight and now I am a healthy body weight. True. If I can do it, anyone can. However fat shaming someone or mocking their excuses IMO helps no one. What I also recognize is that while I can do it and did it...and I am nobody special....I also didn't do it for a long time. For a long time it did seem like something I couldn't do. There are reasons. They are mine. They are also probably excuses, doesn't make them invalid. So, I recognize that this is a journey and everyone is at a different point with a different story.
I also know fat shaming was never my motivation. It never helped. If anything it made it worse. So, when I see fat shaming and it being referenced as trying to help....I call BS and call it fast.
/thread
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https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Proximate_and_ultimate_causation
A proximate cause is an event which is closest to, or immediately responsible for causing, some observed result. This exists in contrast to a higher-level ultimate cause (or distal cause) which is usually thought of as the "real" reason something occurred.
Example: Why did the ship sink?
Proximate cause: Because it was holed beneath the waterline, water entered the hull and the ship became denser than the water which supported it, so it could not stay afloat.
Ultimate cause: Because the ship hit a rock which tore open the hole in the ship's hull.
In most situations, an ultimate cause may itself be a proximate cause for a further ultimate cause. Hence we can continue the above example as follows:
Example: Why did the ship hit the rock?
Proximate cause: Because the ship failed to change course to avoid it.
Ultimate cause: Because the ship was under autopilot and the autopilot's data were inaccurate.
Separating proximate from ultimate causation frequently leads to better understandings of the events and systems concerned.0 -
chaoticdreams wrote: »I had a diabetic mother and was born 11 lbs 12 oz, I was sort of destined to be big, and no not saying that caused me to be fat later on in life.
I'm thinking that is probably not how it works. My son was 11 lbs when he was born. Part of the reason I only had 1 Natural childbirth and all.
But he is a quite healthy 6'3'' normal weight/musculature law enforcement officer. He has never been overweight. His weight at birth did not create some 'destiny' where he would be overweight.
It would be rather interesting for someone to do a study on birth weight in correlation to lifetime weight/obesity. There might be one but I'm too lazy to look for it.
This was partly my earlier point, as well. My son was a month premature, and he was 10 pounds. He's a normal 6 feet and 200 pounds. His father is overweight, but he isn't, and his brother isn't, either. So not falling into the 'predisposed to be overweight' fallacy.0 -
Why was my comment flagged for abuse. I said I was grossed out by someone dipping a burger in a shake. To me just drink the shake with your burger don't dip it in the shake. I didn't say anything about her weight just her choice to dip her burger.0
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Good.Domicinator wrote: »Well, there was definitely backlash for this video and she definitely lost a job because of it:
https://www.google.com/url?sa=t&rct=j&q=&esrc=s&source=web&cd=1&cad=rja&uact=8&ved=0CB8QqQIwAGoVChMI8rzgz_vuxwIVAfSACh1GOwci&url=http://www.eonline.com/news/694742/youtube-star-nicole-arbour-fired-from-movie-role-for-cruel-fat-shaming-video&usg=AFQjCNFtiVTiymO2cdgNJ56lL1YnoK0xfg&bvm=bv.102022582,d.cWw
I hope the whole thing wasn't done for publicity, though. That might even be worse than a crazy woman using fat-shaming to garner attention.
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Good.Domicinator wrote: »Well, there was definitely backlash for this video and she definitely lost a job because of it:
https://www.google.com/url?sa=t&rct=j&q=&esrc=s&source=web&cd=1&cad=rja&uact=8&ved=0CB8QqQIwAGoVChMI8rzgz_vuxwIVAfSACh1GOwci&url=http://www.eonline.com/news/694742/youtube-star-nicole-arbour-fired-from-movie-role-for-cruel-fat-shaming-video&usg=AFQjCNFtiVTiymO2cdgNJ56lL1YnoK0xfg&bvm=bv.102022582,d.cWw
I hope the whole thing wasn't done for publicity, though. That might even be worse than a crazy woman using fat-shaming to garner attention.
Aren't they the same thing?? And that's precisely why she made the video.
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vivmom2014 wrote: »
Good.Domicinator wrote: »Well, there was definitely backlash for this video and she definitely lost a job because of it:
https://www.google.com/url?sa=t&rct=j&q=&esrc=s&source=web&cd=1&cad=rja&uact=8&ved=0CB8QqQIwAGoVChMI8rzgz_vuxwIVAfSACh1GOwci&url=http://www.eonline.com/news/694742/youtube-star-nicole-arbour-fired-from-movie-role-for-cruel-fat-shaming-video&usg=AFQjCNFtiVTiymO2cdgNJ56lL1YnoK0xfg&bvm=bv.102022582,d.cWw
I hope the whole thing wasn't done for publicity, though. That might even be worse than a crazy woman using fat-shaming to garner attention.
Aren't they the same thing?? And that's precisely why she made the video.
I think she meant publicity stunt for the movie she was involved in with. Considering it is essentially a movie about not fat shaming people.0 -
Char231023 wrote: »Why was my comment flagged for abuse. I said I was grossed out by someone dipping a burger in a shake. To me just drink the shake with your burger don't dip it in the shake. I didn't say anything about her weight just her choice to dip her burger.
Because people don't understand how to use the flagging system properly and flag comments they don't like rather than flagging comments which actually are abusive or inappopriate.0 -
Fair enough, point taken. I will shut up now.0 -
She really needs to forget about everyone else and clean her language up. She needs to take some classes on how to NOT BULLY someone. Bulling someone into doing what you want DOSE NOT get someone to lose weight and take care of themselves. It comes from love not trashy talk! 0
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Char231023 wrote: »Why was my comment flagged for abuse. I said I was grossed out by someone dipping a burger in a shake. To me just drink the shake with your burger don't dip it in the shake. I didn't say anything about her weight just her choice to dip her burger.
IMO nothing met the criteria for a flag. You can contact the moderating staff and ask for it to be removed if you would like. I've found varying success, but PM seems to work better than requesting by way of reporting. YMMV.
It not so much that I got the flagged. I just wanted to know why. Although I think those are my first flags.0 -
Char231023 wrote: »Char231023 wrote: »Why was my comment flagged for abuse. I said I was grossed out by someone dipping a burger in a shake. To me just drink the shake with your burger don't dip it in the shake. I didn't say anything about her weight just her choice to dip her burger.
IMO nothing met the criteria for a flag. You can contact the moderating staff and ask for it to be removed if you would like. I've found varying success, but PM seems to work better than requesting by way of reporting. YMMV.
It not so much that I got the flagged. I just wanted to know why. Although I think those are my first flags.
Maybe someone thought hamburger dipped in ice cream is good and didn't agree with you 0
http://youtu.be/dR7LEQYP4rA
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