The official nightshift thread....
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wow, folks...sounds like EVERYBODY got a dose of special treatment during "be proud to be a *kitten*" week over here.
(which...hey, let's face it...is just about EVERY week.)
somebody should publicly post a flowchart of some sort on "how to talk to friends about touchy subjects"...and essentially it should be an acknowledgement of the bad news in the first block..."oh, man. i'm truly sorry to hear that." follow that with a space for a retort from the bearer of the bad news, then a block that has their script in it, with a simple question - "do you want to talk about it?"
below that would be a block with "yes" and instructions to participate in a compassionate, adviceless manner in which you listen more than you talk...and a block with "no", followed by another block with "STFU" in it.
it's depressing that something like this would actually be handy, but most people's collective social skills have deteriorated to the point where we're completely desensitized to our fellow man.
hope your weekends take some sort of upswing while there's still time. packing to move over here, so i'm relatively safe in the confines of the house at the moment. 0 -
I
the pics. Just laughed out loud.
@jennifer_417 maybe he's just embarrassed bc he feels like he goofed. Maybe a smile or ask a question about something you guys went over in class.0 -
I don't think that is necessarily a bad sign @jennifer_417. He might be feelin' like a wank after his last attempted interaction. Might be embarassed of how it went.0
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I...feel like you need to be on my FL. Incoming request, should you choose to accept it.hamptontom wrote: »wow, folks...sounds like EVERYBODY got a dose of special treatment during "be proud to be a *kitten*" week over here.
(which...hey, let's face it...is just about EVERY week.)
somebody should publicly post a flowchart of some sort on "how to talk to friends about touchy subjects"...and essentially it should be an acknowledgement of the bad news in the first block..."oh, man. i'm truly sorry to hear that." follow that with a space for a retort from the bearer of the bad news, then a block that has their script in it, with a simple question - "do you want to talk about it?"
below that would be a block with "yes" and instructions to participate in a compassionate, adviceless manner in which you listen more than you talk...and a block with "no", followed by another block with "STFU" in it.
it's depressing that something like this would actually be handy, but most people's collective social skills have deteriorated to the point where we're completely desensitized to our fellow man.
hope your weekends take some sort of upswing while there's still time. packing to move over here, so i'm relatively safe in the confines of the house at the moment.
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Frankie_Felinius wrote: »I don't think that is necessarily a bad sign @jennifer_417. He might be feelin' like a wank after his last attempted interaction. Might be embarassed of how it went.
I actually wondered the same thing...just all the awkwardness is getting on my nerves, y'know?bethanie0825 wrote: »I the pics. Just laughed out loud.
@jennifer_417 maybe he's just embarrassed bc he feels like he goofed. Maybe a smile or ask a question about something you guys went over in class.
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jennifer_417 wrote: »I...feel like you need to be on my FL. Incoming request, should you choose to accept it.
but of course...thanks!0 -
@lilaclovebird Your coworkers sound very much like mine. "Do what I say, but no way in hell would I do it myself." This doesn't just go for weight loss, but stress management. I have one subordinate who tells me I shouldn't let the f***-ups who f***ck-up and get ME in trouble let it stress me. Then proceeds to curse at me and tell me I'm not stressing them out and f***ing working them to death, getting stressed out, when I give them 5 minutes worth of work.
@Frankie_Felinius It sounds like we'd get along well as friends. First today you had me at snow Second... I've 'met' someone who I wouldn't have to explain what "I'm kind of a misanthrope" means when asked why I well, for lack of better words, hate people.
@jennifer_417 wish I had something to say for you, but having exactly 0 of anything even close to interpersonal relations on that level in 36 years... yeah, I've got nothing, sorry.
@hamptontom the flow chart I'd create for that subject would have just one large red box, inside saying "just don't f***ing do it."
So my father's visiting, and I go to sleep at 8pm Saturday evening, being up since Friday 6pm. My usual Saturday. Dad's visiting. He's giving been me sh** about the size clothes I wear. I wake up 12am (yes, even weekends I can't sleep), as is normal, to find bags of chips open other food open, etc. Basically it's pastries for beakfast, then he starves all day, (and when I'm with him I have to do the same because he will NOT stop for food or water), then a huge dinner. Then cookies and tea. Then he gorges on snacks at night after I go to bed. I wake up feeling like crap and hungry. I probably blast well past my calorie allowance (in not so nutritious food like pastries and cookies), and having starved all day, I guess it just doesn't feel like I ate that dinner.
I'm the type of person who wants everyone ELSE to be happy and keep my mouth shut, but really, I can't figure out how to politely say (without sounding like I'm lecturing) that we need to eat resonably throughout the day. Not as a diet thing, but I feel a hell of a lot better not starving myself just so I can indulge first and last things in the day.0 -
How do you guys deal with difficult coworkers? yet again tonight I get one calling me, giving me attitude, and when I give the same attitude back, I get a call from management saying that the other person called them I'm the one being disrespectful! People around here speak to me however they want, and I'm supposed to bend over and kiss their *kitten*, or I get threatened with discipline? WTF? I wish I could quit this job, but not being college educated (and even then in the current job climate), there's not many options.
I wish I could not take these things personal, but how can I not? I try to treat everyone with respect, until I get the opposite. It's wearing on me, and I feel like blowing my top, and I hope I can find a solution before it's too late.
I feel ya. I am a prison guard and I work the overnight shift. You would think I would worry about offenders but no its staff and petty *kitten*. I had the exact same thing happen to me. You have to blow it off or be the person to talk to management. I hate saying that and I haven't done it yet and it's biting me in the *kitten* now. Chin up it will get better!0 -
@hamptontom the flow chart I'd create for that subject would have just one large red box, inside saying "just don't f***ing do it."
you're probably spot-on, there...but i generally figure that if it were a big enough deal that somebody would bring it up in conversation, that i should at least express some degree of sympathy. whether or not to go past that should be up to them. To not at least say "i'm sorry" really isn't in my wheelhouse.
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BTW, I found my new weekend awesome breakfast: oatmeal with pumpkin seeds. It's got an awesome texture.
Now I'm off on a 3:30am bike ride. That was fun last week, and I've been looking forward to it. Let's see how many rabbits and raccoons I swerve around tonight!0 -
@hamptontom the flow chart I'd create for that subject would have just one large red box, inside saying "just don't f***ing do it."
you're probably spot-on, there...but i generally figure that if it were a big enough deal that somebody would bring it up in conversation, that i should at least express some degree of sympathy. whether or not to go past that should be up to them. To not at least say "i'm sorry" really isn't in my wheelhouse.
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@belimawr
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I think people just lack basic sensitivity. They don't take the time to "read" the situation or the person in front of them in order to assess how best to handle things.0
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And we've lost the art of conversation. Everything is over text and abbreviated. People can't even put their phones down at the dinner table. And unfortunately some people's vocabulary is diminishing.0
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Anyone here!!!0
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bethanie0825 wrote: »And we've lost the art of conversation. Everything is over text and abbreviated. People can't even put their phones down at the dinner table. And unfortunately some people's vocabulary is diminishing.
SOME?!
I also think it's terrible that there are a number of people who don't try to push their limits mentally and intellectually. The number of people I physically know who have ACTUALLY READ The Hobbit and the Lord of the Rings trilogy can be counted on one hand. That includes myself.
The others all said "It was too hard" and "Boring."
The pool of imaginative minds is also drastically shrinking and the surrounding plants shrivel in the drought being brought upon society and perpetuated by a school system that exists, not to teach children how to think critically or for themselves, but only to help them pass a standardized test that allows for little growth or individuality.
ETA: /end rant0 -
OMG, so true! People are expected to mindlessly conform, from childhood, to a system. I'm no anarchist, but people need to learn how to think for themselves.lilaclovebird wrote: »bethanie0825 wrote: »And we've lost the art of conversation. Everything is over text and abbreviated. People can't even put their phones down at the dinner table. And unfortunately some people's vocabulary is diminishing.
SOME?!
I also think it's terrible that there are a number of people who don't try to push their limits mentally and intellectually. The number of people I physically know who have ACTUALLY READ The Hobbit and the Lord of the Rings trilogy can be counted on one hand. That includes myself.
The others all said "It was too hard" and "Boring."
The pool of imaginative minds is also drastically shrinking and the surrounding plants shrivel in the drought being brought upon society and perpetuated by a school system that exists, not to teach children how to think critically or for themselves, but only to help them pass a standardized test that allows for little growth or individuality.
ETA: /end rant
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bethanie0825 wrote: »And we've lost the art of conversation. Everything is over text and abbreviated. People can't even put their phones down at the dinner table. And unfortunately some people's vocabulary is diminishing.
I just saw a news story about this. It's sad.
Even worse, kids in school are handing in reports, with words spelled as if the kid was texting.lilaclovebird wrote: »I also think it's terrible that there are a number of people who don't try to push their limits mentally and intellectually. The number of people I physically know who have ACTUALLY READ The Hobbit and the Lord of the Rings trilogy can be counted on one hand. That includes myself.
I have read the Hobbit, years ago before it was the in thing, but have not seen the movie. I own, but have not read, The Lord of the Rings, but have seen the movies.
I don't want to say it is boring. I used to be big on the fantasy and sci fi stuff. I also like all stuff Medieval, so they fit well together. At some point after reading the Hobbit, I discovered historical fiction, in some centered around England in the middle ages, and found it far more fascinating than stuff like Lord of the Rings. I like to think because it's easier to visualize, and if I can't picture it, I can find out what a town or such may have looked like.0 -
I read the Hobbit in 5th grade at the urging of a teacher I had a crush on at the time, Mr. Nettles. He was a cyclist and shaved his legs and everyone thought that was weird. I thought it was awesome that someone would do something so 'out of the ordinary' for their hobby and I think that is where brains and a passion for something became one of the main factors in my attraction to a person.
Then in 6th grade we were having it read TO us during lunch and various study breaks in 6th grade.
Ms. Heedum had to stop reading it because a lot of the kids complained that it was 'too boring' and switched it out for Harry Potter.
I reread it and wrote a small essay on it in 7th grade and started branching out into all sorts of books and I would get made fun of a lot for reading in class when I didn't have to.
In high school, I was made fun of for doing the reading assignments, relating to the characters and being able to sympathize with them, my ability to do basic math equations and solve linear functions in my head, and of COURSE something about my physical appearance that the girls LOVED picking on me for, my large breasts.
In math, my tormentors received backlash from the teachers and other students. I mostly felt ashamed that I never made an attempt to defend myself.
In English and literature courses, NO ONE came to my defense. My intellect was belittled and I let it affect my work and it eventually affected my grades.
My ability to sympathize with multiple people and put myself in their shoes made me an excellent drama student but got me shunned in Social Studies when I could side with 'the enemy' and see their perspective.
I still have many disagreements with my father in regards to the Nazis. It doesn't occur to him that there are many who only did what they were told in an effort to save their own families and themselves. It's not so easy to speak up when everyone else will readily stand against you to save their own skin. I see both perspectives, the tortured and the torturers. Both sides suffer and no one really wins in the end.
I definitely side with Corrie Ten Boom and her witnessing and believing that those who are able to forgive are best able to rebuild their lives. I believe it also goes for forgiving yourself for your own wrong doings.
ETA: And insight into my life....
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Dispatcher's words on the radio to a specific officer: "You have a daughter, call her."
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