I grant then ruin someone's wish...

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Replies

  • lilawolf
    lilawolf Posts: 1,690 Member
    Granted, but the dark side ran out of cookies last Friday and now the minions are revolting due to false advertising.
    darkside_fullpic.png

    I wish that I could be completely healthy until the day I die suddenly in my sleep at 94.
  • 47Jacqueline
    47Jacqueline Posts: 6,993 Member
    Granted. Today is your 94th birthday.

    I wish I didn't need dental surgery
  • lilawolf
    lilawolf Posts: 1,690 Member
    Nice one lol.

    Granted. You don't need dental surgery because you have no teeth.

    I wish that I would stay at my ideal weight no matter what I eat or drink.
  • motterotter
    motterotter Posts: 701 Member
    Granted but then you would be a vampire and not a secksy kind the nosferatu kind

    Wish I lived on the moors and had a pony
  • lilawolf
    lilawolf Posts: 1,690 Member
    Granted, but that's because 99.5% of the world population was killed off by a plague so there are plenty of resources for the immune.

    I wish that I would win every game I played.
  • jaymvita
    jaymvita Posts: 5,787 Member
    lilawolf wrote: »
    Granted, but that's because 99.5% of the world population was killed off by a plague so there are plenty of resources for the immune.

    I wish that I would win every game I played.

    Granted. You're playing Russain Roulette. Alone.

    I wish I had a few of my favorite things with me.
  • Jetamu96
    Jetamu96 Posts: 963 Member
    Granted, but they all smell like dog feces

    I wish I knew what to do
  • gquesnelle
    gquesnelle Posts: 206 Member
    Jetamu96 wrote: »
    Granted, but they all smell like dog feces

    I wish I knew what to do

    Granted, but you only know what do do right now and still don't know what to do in the future.

    I wish that I never had to go grocery shopping and that my fridge was always stocked with the foods I enjoy (and their proper taste!).
  • jaymvita
    jaymvita Posts: 5,787 Member
    gquesnelle wrote: »
    Jetamu96 wrote: »
    Granted, but they all smell like dog feces

    I wish I knew what to do

    Granted, but you only know what do do right now and still don't know what to do in the future.

    I wish that I never had to go grocery shopping and that my fridge was always stocked with the foods I enjoy (and their proper taste!).

    Granted but your tongue dies in your mouth and your esophagus shrivels up leaving you only able to be fed intravenously. Your legs get paralyzed as well which leaves you to sit in front of your incredibly stocked fridge with all that succulent food beckoning to you a mere few feet away. Very very long feet ...

    I wish I could catch that pesky penguin that turns out the light in my fridge.
  • Cindy4FunFit
    Cindy4FunFit Posts: 2,732 Member
    Granted: you finally catch that penguin after a 40 year goose chase across the frozen tundra...you're an old, half frozen man with a weird story missing a few digits to frost bite. Life well spent? I dunno.

    Wish: the concept was easy to grasp
  • khara2012
    khara2012 Posts: 1,051 Member
    Granted. But it is so easy to grasp it seems stupid, like everything you think of. You have now lost your mind because there is nothing left to challenge your intelligence, and your brain has turned to mush.

    I wish there were more good television programs out there for me to binge watch....
  • jbuzzed
    jbuzzed Posts: 10,172 Member
    Granted but you sacrifice all relationships in your life binge watching

    I wish I had someone to deliver me coffee anytime I want it
  • bdgfn
    bdgfn Posts: 7,719 Member
    Granted, but the coffee is never the way you like it.

    I wish I was an astronaut.
  • motterotter
    motterotter Posts: 701 Member
    Granted but then your fellow astronauts start dying mysteriously from a highly contagious painful alien virus and you are sacrificed for the good of mankind slowly and painfully alone on the spacestation so you die alone in pain slowly with no contact with your loved ones

    I wish i had a Tardis
  • jenmar222
    jenmar222 Posts: 9,271 Member
    edited January 2016
    Granted. But you're not The Doctor, so you don't have a key to get in it. So I, the new Clara Oswald (:tongue:), steals it from you and flies off.

    I wish that I could teleport hot celebrity guys to me anytime I wanted.
  • bdgfn
    bdgfn Posts: 7,719 Member
    Granted, however the teleportation process converts them all into eunuchs.

    I wish someone would just destroy ISIS once and for all!
  • _HunterKiller_
    _HunterKiller_ Posts: 544 Member
    edited January 2016
    Granted, however religion is a cancer and there is no cure. They regroup under a different name

    I wish I could teleport myself anywhere in the world when I want to

  • MaxPower6868
    MaxPower6868 Posts: 220 Member
    Granted, but a fly got in the teleporter with you.....and we all know how THAT ends!

    I wish I could eat all the pizza and wings I want, and never gain any weight.
  • jenmar222
    jenmar222 Posts: 9,271 Member
    You can, but after every two slices your penis shrinks an inch

    I wish I could be the next companion on Doctor Who
  • jbuzzed
    jbuzzed Posts: 10,172 Member
    Granted but you cause the show to be cancelled after one episode.

    I wish I didn't make myself sick eating so much chocolate.
  • zcb94
    zcb94 Posts: 3,678 Member
    Granted, you discover to your horror that you're now allergic to chocolate :sad:
    I wish I could get by with a standard 8-hour night of sleep, as opposed to needing a nap every few days.
  • 47Jacqueline
    47Jacqueline Posts: 6,993 Member
    Granted, you sleep 8 hours during the day.
    I wish I hadn't had an infected front tooth that needed to be extracted.
  • motterotter
    motterotter Posts: 701 Member
    Granted but now you have the largest zit on the planet
    I wish i had a pet unikitty
  • Iguessicandothis
    Iguessicandothis Posts: 2,132 Member
    Granted. But those only live on the barely habitable planet of corposis. So you've given up all family and friends and the most basic of pleasures just to have your unikitty.

    I wish I hadn't eaten so much icecream
  • zcb94
    zcb94 Posts: 3,678 Member
    Granted, you couldn't have done that due to severe lactose intolerance.
    I wish the wound I'm dealing with would hurry up and
    close already!
  • jenmar222
    jenmar222 Posts: 9,271 Member
    edited February 2016
    Granted. Your wound does close, but then a bear comes and eats you.

    I wish I had a puppy! :love:
  • 47Jacqueline
    47Jacqueline Posts: 6,993 Member
    edited February 2016
    Granted, but your landlord didn't allow pets, so you're homeless.

    I wish it wouldn't snow today.
  • PhatBeats
    PhatBeats Posts: 15 Member
    Granted, but then you'd have to go to work and there's a really big project deadline you forgot about.

    I wish I had an iPhone 6. :(
  • kjm3579
    kjm3579 Posts: 3,974 Member
    PhatBeats wrote: »
    Granted, but then you'd have to go to work and there's a really big project deadline you forgot about.

    I wish I had an iPhone 6. :(

    Granted, you now have an iPhone 6 -- however the newest technology is now the iPhone 99 ..... yours is no longer supported.
  • kjm3579
    kjm3579 Posts: 3,974 Member
    kjm3579 wrote: »
    PhatBeats wrote: »
    Granted, but then you'd have to go to work and there's a really big project deadline you forgot about.

    I wish I had an iPhone 6. :(

    Granted, you now have an iPhone 6 -- however the newest technology is now the iPhone 99 ..... yours is no longer supported.

    I wish I didn't have to work anymore.
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