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Alcohol and Society

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  • JustMissTracy
    JustMissTracy Posts: 6,339 Member
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    Huh. Hubs and I have drank every weekend, give or take, for 23 years.....We even got a little sloshed on the night we met! The only dangerous thing that came from that was now I have to listen to him snore every nite! I understand that alcohol can lower inhibitions, but we still need to own our actions, booze or no booze.
  • BinaryPulsar
    BinaryPulsar Posts: 8,927 Member
    edited September 2016
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    Like I said I didn't drink for a year. I did recently try again and had a relapse of my medical condition. But, I don't see any violence when around people drinking. I think this might have something to do with the people you are with and what they are doing. I just see people relaxed, having fun, letting go of some inhibition (to dance). But, like I said, you don't need alcohol for that. But some people prefer it. And that's ok. It's silly to have an us against them mentality whether you drink or don't drink. But, I understand what people mean. They are using the word teetotaler to be interchangeable with judgy people. I do find certain judgy people to be the most miserable. But, there are judgy people that drink or don't drink. I encounter a lot of straight laced people, intolerant to anything different from them, "shocked" by people being uninhibited (or sexuality) that drink. They sit around on their grumpy butts drinking and judging. Lol

    Edit to add: I also went for up to a decade without drinking.
  • T0M_K
    T0M_K Posts: 7,526 Member
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    newmeadow wrote: »
    newmeadow wrote: »
    newmeadow wrote: »
    phnxrth wrote: »
    Ever been the only sober person in a group of drinkers? You'd better have a slightly dark sense of humor, because it's not funny.

    Yep. Also, there's a slight vibe of danger that always seems to be lurking in the environment amidst the guffaws and raised voices and exaggerated interactions - something I never noticed when I was a drinker myself. I'll stick around for one hour tops, if I have to, but after a half hour it's barely tolerable.

    Lurking danger vibe? Wow, where the heck do you hang out? Having been pregnant multiple times I've spent my fair share of time as a sober person around drinkers. I don't know that I've ever felt any danger vibes. Certainly not from the people I was with. I was at a bar once where a couple of women got in a fight, but they were quickly removed from the premises and I can't say I felt any danger from the incident.

    The ability to assess a situation for potential danger is greatly enhanced when one's been abstinent from alcohol for awhile. Generally one year plus. And without wanting to seem condescending in saying this, one would have to be abstinent from alcohol for about a year to get this. The danger doesn't have to be the idea or possibility of people pulling out guns and starting a shootout. It's more an ability to sense the underlying aggression that drinking alcohol fuels, in almost everyone who drinks it. And the potential for that aggression (including passive aggression) to take on a life of its own. It's quite palpable in the air at any gathering of drinkers. Now whether the drinkers realize this conundrum or not (which they almost always heartily deny when presented with rhetorical questions on such) is a whole 'nuther discussion I suppose - and probably a pretty flammable one.

    Oh please! Don't be ridiculous. I say I don't drink during pregnancies and you pull some random timeframe out of your um, head, that you think is longer than I've gone without drinking. But, it's all just made up nonsense. First of all, I've gone longer than year without drinking. Who drinks while they are trying to conceive? And I usually didn't start drinking for a few months after giving birth to give my body a chance to recover (I'm pretty health conscious) . It was longer than a year every single time. *BOOM*

    Alcohol does make some people aggressive, just like it makes some people weepy, some people clingy (the "I love you man" people), etc. IDK if you have some bad experiences with drinkers in your personal life and think everyone is like that or just live in a really bad neighborhood region. But you can't judge the entire library by the cover of one book.

    And without wanting to seem condescending in saying this, one would really need to spend a lot of time around a large group of drinkers to understand. Like at least 15 months around 15 drinkers at minimum to understand.

    No, sorry, I didn't mean to imply that you drank while you were pregnant or when you were trying to conceive. Wasn't doing that. The one year time frame I used as an example was a personal example (stopped drinking in the year 2000) and also one accepted as a general time frame by lots of non drinkers I know. Making the decision to stop drinking permanently and then doing it really does change everything, including the way you think and perceive things.

    As for the second bolded paragraph, believe me, I'm no stranger to drinkers and drinking. My immediate and extended family is saturated in booze. I knew what whisky smelled like on my father's breath before I knew what cotton candy smelled like. I drank liberally myself and also served alcohol, full time, for a living between the ages of 16 and 32. I'm not proud to say I derived my income, at that time, from serving alcohol. I've been surrounded by all types of drinkers from all walks of life and I used to love the swill myself. I'll stand by my original statement that no good comes from the drinking and that the topic itself, when discussed in detail and with personal anecdotes, is inflammatory.

    And with that I'm out :smile:



    your disillusion. and your opinions are that, opinions derived by your personal experiences. you can't generalize all of society on your own opinions. its tantamount to saying that if you were abused by your father, that all fathers are abusers. You statements are ridiculous. making the decision to stop drinking does change "everything" including the way you think is pure nonsense and only an opinion and you should qualify your statements as such.
  • T0M_K
    T0M_K Posts: 7,526 Member
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    Tomk652015 wrote: »
    newmeadow wrote: »
    newmeadow wrote: »
    newmeadow wrote: »
    phnxrth wrote: »
    Ever been the only sober person in a group of drinkers? You'd better have a slightly dark sense of humor, because it's not funny.

    Yep. Also, there's a slight vibe of danger that always seems to be lurking in the environment amidst the guffaws and raised voices and exaggerated interactions - something I never noticed when I was a drinker myself. I'll stick around for one hour tops, if I have to, but after a half hour it's barely tolerable.

    Lurking danger vibe? Wow, where the heck do you hang out? Having been pregnant multiple times I've spent my fair share of time as a sober person around drinkers. I don't know that I've ever felt any danger vibes. Certainly not from the people I was with. I was at a bar once where a couple of women got in a fight, but they were quickly removed from the premises and I can't say I felt any danger from the incident.

    The ability to assess a situation for potential danger is greatly enhanced when one's been abstinent from alcohol for awhile. Generally one year plus. And without wanting to seem condescending in saying this, one would have to be abstinent from alcohol for about a year to get this. The danger doesn't have to be the idea or possibility of people pulling out guns and starting a shootout. It's more an ability to sense the underlying aggression that drinking alcohol fuels, in almost everyone who drinks it. And the potential for that aggression (including passive aggression) to take on a life of its own. It's quite palpable in the air at any gathering of drinkers. Now whether the drinkers realize this conundrum or not (which they almost always heartily deny when presented with rhetorical questions on such) is a whole 'nuther discussion I suppose - and probably a pretty flammable one.

    Oh please! Don't be ridiculous. I say I don't drink during pregnancies and you pull some random timeframe out of your um, head, that you think is longer than I've gone without drinking. But, it's all just made up nonsense. First of all, I've gone longer than year without drinking. Who drinks while they are trying to conceive? And I usually didn't start drinking for a few months after giving birth to give my body a chance to recover (I'm pretty health conscious) . It was longer than a year every single time. *BOOM*

    Alcohol does make some people aggressive, just like it makes some people weepy, some people clingy (the "I love you man" people), etc. IDK if you have some bad experiences with drinkers in your personal life and think everyone is like that or just live in a really bad neighborhood region. But you can't judge the entire library by the cover of one book.

    And without wanting to seem condescending in saying this, one would really need to spend a lot of time around a large group of drinkers to understand. Like at least 15 months around 15 drinkers at minimum to understand.

    No, sorry, I didn't mean to imply that you drank while you were pregnant or when you were trying to conceive. Wasn't doing that. The one year time frame I used as an example was a personal example (stopped drinking in the year 2000) and also one accepted as a general time frame by lots of non drinkers I know. Making the decision to stop drinking permanently and then doing it really does change everything, including the way you think and perceive things.

    As for the second bolded paragraph, believe me, I'm no stranger to drinkers and drinking. My immediate and extended family is saturated in booze. I knew what whisky smelled like on my father's breath before I knew what cotton candy smelled like. I drank liberally myself and also served alcohol, full time, for a living between the ages of 16 and 32. I'm not proud to say I derived my income, at that time, from serving alcohol. I've been surrounded by all types of drinkers from all walks of life and I used to love the swill myself. I'll stand by my original statement that no good comes from the drinking and that the topic itself, when discussed in detail and with personal anecdotes, is inflammatory.

    And with that I'm out :smile:



    your disillusion. and your opinions are that, opinions derived by your personal experiences. you can't generalize all of society on your own opinions. its tantamount to saying that if you were abused by your father, that all fathers are abusers. You statements are ridiculous. making the decision to stop drinking does change "everything" including the way you think is pure nonsense and only an opinion and you should qualify your statements as such.

    and by the way.... @newmeadow you offend me. just so we're clear.
  • T0M_K
    T0M_K Posts: 7,526 Member
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    dumb *kitten*
  • Heartisalonelyhunter
    Heartisalonelyhunter Posts: 786 Member
    edited September 2016
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    newmeadow wrote: »
    newmeadow wrote: »
    phnxrth wrote: »
    Ever been the only sober person in a group of drinkers? You'd better have a slightly dark sense of humor, because it's not funny.

    Yep. Also, there's a slight vibe of danger that always seems to be lurking in the environment amidst the guffaws and raised voices and exaggerated interactions - something I never noticed when I was a drinker myself. I'll stick around for one hour tops, if I have to, but after a half hour it's barely tolerable.

    Lurking danger vibe? Wow, where the heck do you hang out? Having been pregnant multiple times I've spent my fair share of time as a sober person around drinkers. I don't know that I've ever felt any danger vibes. Certainly not from the people I was with. I was at a bar once where a couple of women got in a fight, but they were quickly removed from the premises and I can't say I felt any danger from the incident.

    The ability to assess a situation for potential danger is greatly enhanced when one's been abstinent from alcohol for awhile. Generally one year plus. And without wanting to seem condescending in saying this, one would have to be abstinent from alcohol for about a year to get this. The danger doesn't have to be the idea or possibility of people pulling out guns and starting a shootout. It's more an ability to sense the underlying aggression that drinking alcohol fuels, in almost everyone who drinks it. And the potential for that aggression (including passive aggression) to take on a life of its own. It's quite palpable in the air at any gathering of drinkers. Now whether the drinkers realize this conundrum or not (which they almost always heartily deny when presented with rhetorical questions on such) is a whole 'nuther discussion I suppose - and probably a pretty flammable one.

    Oh please! Don't be ridiculous. I say I don't drink during pregnancies and you pull some random timeframe out of your um, head, that you think is longer than I've gone without drinking. But, it's all just made up nonsense. First of all, I've gone longer than year without drinking. Who drinks while they are trying to conceive? And I usually didn't start drinking for a few months after giving birth to give my body a chance to recover (I'm pretty health conscious) . It was longer than a year every single time. *BOOM*

    Alcohol does make some people aggressive, just like it makes some people weepy, some people clingy (the "I love you man" people), etc. IDK if you have some bad experiences with drinkers in your personal life and think everyone is like that or just live in a really bad neighborhood region. But you can't judge the entire library by the cover of one book.

    And without wanting to seem condescending in saying this, one would really need to spend a lot of time around a large group of drinkers to understand. Like at least 15 months around 15 drinkers at minimum to understand.

    Oh I'd say more like 23 months with at least 23 drinkers. And one of them would have to be drinking Kahlua and wearing purple in order to for anyone to gain any real 'insight'.

    But this is why people don't invite passive aggressive teetotalers to parties. They're just no fun and spend their time coming up with ridiculous theories about why every one else having fun is a bad thing.
  • stevencloser
    stevencloser Posts: 8,911 Member
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    Wow, I drink maybe once every other month or so and I feel offended by this holier than thou attitude.
  • auddii
    auddii Posts: 15,357 Member
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    Alluminati wrote: »
    tumblr_inline_oa0hc2B7oc1tzge36_500.gif

    How did we end up in the darkest timeline?!
  • BinaryPulsar
    BinaryPulsar Posts: 8,927 Member
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    There are really only about two people doing the extreme no alcohol judgement thing in this thread. Meh, who cares. It's like when there is a thread about sex and people come in to say: I have never had a one night stand because I am classy. It's fine to never have a one night stand. It's following it with a stupid judgement that makes the whole environment feel uncomfortable and awkward. Like this thread that could have been an interesting conversation, but now it's just dealing with the judgment and reactions. Definitely a dumpster fire now.
  • Karb_Kween
    Karb_Kween Posts: 2,681 Member
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    There are really only about two people doing the extreme no alcohol judgement thing in this thread. Meh, who cares. It's like when there is a thread about sex and people come in to say: I have never had a one night stand because I am classy. It's fine to never have a one night stand. It's following it with a stupid judgement that makes the whole environment feel uncomfortable and awkward. Like this thread that could have been an interesting conversation, but now it's just dealing with the judgment and reactions. Definitely a dumpster fire now.

    I'm scared to say anything because I imbibe
  • BinaryPulsar
    BinaryPulsar Posts: 8,927 Member
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    Karb_Kween wrote: »
    There are really only about two people doing the extreme no alcohol judgement thing in this thread. Meh, who cares. It's like when there is a thread about sex and people come in to say: I have never had a one night stand because I am classy. It's fine to never have a one night stand. It's following it with a stupid judgement that makes the whole environment feel uncomfortable and awkward. Like this thread that could have been an interesting conversation, but now it's just dealing with the judgment and reactions. Definitely a dumpster fire now.

    I'm scared to say anything because I imbibe

    I understand that feeling. I'm not judging anyone. And probably most people aren't. But, sometimes the most judgy people end up dominating. And then the conversation becomes more adversarial than it would have been. Sorry you feel that way.
  • CSARdiver
    CSARdiver Posts: 6,252 Member
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    Karb_Kween wrote: »
    There are really only about two people doing the extreme no alcohol judgement thing in this thread. Meh, who cares. It's like when there is a thread about sex and people come in to say: I have never had a one night stand because I am classy. It's fine to never have a one night stand. It's following it with a stupid judgement that makes the whole environment feel uncomfortable and awkward. Like this thread that could have been an interesting conversation, but now it's just dealing with the judgment and reactions. Definitely a dumpster fire now.

    I'm scared to say anything because I imbibe

    Well yeah?! Your judgement is all off and this might happen:

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Jsci--s8J48
  • Need2Exerc1se
    Need2Exerc1se Posts: 13,576 Member
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    Getting back to society, the thing I notice most about society's views on alcohol is that more people who don't drink think everyone should not drink, than people who drink think everyone should drink. And a lot of those that think no one should drink seem to think themselves superior in some way to those that drink.

    Those are of course grand generalizations and not always true, but IDK how to talk about "society" without generalizations. But it seems true more often than not to me.