WOMEN AGES 50+ FOR FEBRUARY 2017

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  • klanders30
    klanders30 Posts: 2,569 Member
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    kim first,I am so sorry that your mom spoke to you that way. Second, you take care of you, stay safe from him. Your dear mom is wrapped up in this and it is her choice to care for him, no matter the danger. It is an untenable situation. You've gone through every avenue you possibly could to help.

    My mom only had emotion and worry for her abusive son. We were all secondary since we took care of ourselves and didn't stay around to be abused. It is very hard to not feel pulled back into the circle but there is a reason why you have made a good life for yourself, you deserve to keep yourself safe and healthy. ((( <3 )))
    NYKAREN
  • GRITSandSLUTSandWINOS
    GRITSandSLUTSandWINOS Posts: 2,573 Member
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    Pip – I did hear their reason … ‘they wrote the song in their shorts; and, agreed that ‘if’ they ever made it to the Grammy’s they would do the same thing’. However, I doubt they had on their Tux jackets on at that time. I wanted to see more ‘male’ skin. Not fair that the women had slits up to their ‘honey hole’ and DH can say, ‘DAMN, ya think she has a slit cut up high enough, (?) wonder if she has on anything under that (?) … she is just asking to have a clothing malfunction. The one that came out first (maybe Jennifer Lopez), the one in the pink gown.

    Janetr okc – So sorry about your grandson. I know from watching my BF go through the same thing … how it has affected her. Prayers, good thoughts, and {{{{{HUGS}}}}} for all of you! I sure ‘hope’ he is ‘ok’ and safe and not using again.

    Brings back that saying, ‘it’s not the number of times you fall down; it is the number of times you stand up’.

    Betty – I have sometimes found that even from morning to evening … there might be 100 posts. I will read through 100 posts or less; over that, I just go back a few pages and read from that point. Too overwhelming for me. LOL!

    frannieshack – Our DOGD is in the ‘age group’, she is a ‘driven young lady’ … and all her life until she turned 14; when her Dad got custody of her, had watched her mother drink so much that she could not function. The screaming, cursing, fights between, first her 2nd husband, then a boyfriend … (live-in) there are just some things she won’t stay around. No telling what might have happened to her if custody had not been changed. Her middle sister on her mother’s side had been living with her paternal grandmother (basically to keep her out of the situation as much as possible; she even paid her C/S); then, when she and the youngest sister came to DOGD’s HS graduation … the baby sister was going to spend the weekend (she noticed her scratching her head; and, went to check on her and she had ‘head lice’ so bad that she had sores and you could literally see them crawling). Needless, to say … she did not stay; but DDnL#1 went and bought 2 bottles of lice shampoo; wash her hair and treated her. Then DOGD took her and the 2nd bottle back to her Mama and told her why she could not stay out here, told her to do the 2nd treatment and left. She called DFACS and reported her mother. They came and picked up the child, she got arrested (not for the first time); and, she has lost custody, now, of all 3 of her girls.

    While she talks a ‘big game’; she has done ‘nothing’ she was ordered to do, before they would even consider letting her have them back. I think now, her parental rights have been terminated by the court. She then called her Daddy and told him what had happened and that he needed to come get her before they put her into a ‘foster home’. DFACS had called DOGD (over the age of 18) and asked if she would take her. NOPE, going to college, not going to be forced to be a Mama; I’ve called her Daddy and he is on his way from TN to pick her up. I think my DOGD won’t ever take a drink; not even to ‘celebrate’ in March, turning 21. Now, I won’t say she won’t go to a bar somewhere … but, I doubt she will partake of alcohol. She grew up hard, changing diapers and making bottles when she was only 6 or 7. She does NOT want any children any time soon, if ever.

    When she was a Freshman in HS; our DYS gave a 'talking to' right in front of Louis and me; he did not leave out anything. #1 - When a boy says he 'loves' you (especially in HS) ... all that means is 'he wants to get in your panties'; so "Protect your @$$et!" IF he really loved you, he would not be trying so hard to 'take something away from you, that he cannot give back to you'. Then, drinking ... he knew he had brought a lot of grief to us worrying about where he was and who he was with. Being 'honest' is the best way ... they were also 'once teenagers themselves'. By this time, Louis and I were 'wide-eyed'. Stay in school, stay in school, stay in school, get a job, support yourself for awhile before you get married and start having children; so that you will know that you can always do it if you have to. When the right one comes along, Nana says ... you'll know it. Don't ask me how; but, she's a pretty good teacher'. I was so proud of him, and, that isn't her 'Daddy'.

    Fran – While you don’t have to tell us; where in GA do you live (specifically or generally)? I’m in SW GA (in Dawson) about 25 miles from Albany; and 20 miles from Americus.

    Janet OKC – Congrats on winning the LuLaRoe leggings. Said you had never won anything; neither had I. This year when I went to the Women’s Retreat that I go to every Oct/Nov, I won a prize every day. Three – a pair of earrings; a journal; and the Grand Prize – a silver cross on a chain. I was ‘so excited’!!!!

    I worked in a plaintiff firm that specialized in medical malpractice, medical malfeasance, product liability, wrecks. Also divorces (either party) and criminal cases – most as appointed attorneys (or at least my boss did). It was fast pace, sometimes stressful, but always ‘fun’ (insofar as working for my boss – he was a sweetheart). I was a little intimidated by the ‘big boss’ and his ‘secretary’ … the fought like cats and dogs; and, she would end up trying to take it out on me; by calling me to her office to tell me all the things I was doing WRONG. He called me into his office, I just ‘knew’ he was going to fire me. He pulled out a carbon copy of a letter she had typed, signed his name to, and sent out and told me to read it. After I did, I looked up at him. He asked me to tell me about the letter (and then he called her in). “UH, 7 typos!” He turned to her and asked ‘how long had she worked for him’? Something close to 20 years (more or less). Actually, she was his first ‘secretary’. He then told me, that as long as he was ‘in his office’ and did not have a client with him, if she called me for anything … I could walk through his office. I sat in a dark paneled room with no windows. When my boss became the Federal Magistrate, he took me with him as his secretary. Huge raise, great benefits!

    Jolenec1 – The first thing I do when I get out of bed, is make my bed; then, the next thing I do is make sure the dishes are in the dishwasher until it is full; if full ... wash them. To me, that is my ‘basic’ home cleaning; I do other things in spurts. A couple of Thanksgivings ago, the week before I went into ‘over-drive’ and my house was ‘spotless’ as in everything in every room was done, top to bottom. My mind had to be on ‘high zone’ because I do not remember doing it; and, DH says I did it without anybody help. He said he’d come in and sometimes I would be in a ‘frenzy’; the next time, I would be asleep in my chair.

    Katie – I love French Onion Soup; and, I like the cheese to be so thick you can hardly cut through it and it had ‘long strings’ you have to pull off. Not a particularly ‘cool’ thing to do ‘out in a restaurant’. I don’t have it often; but, I think I could eat my weight in it.

    I hope to ‘never’ walk into another hotel room and see a red flashing light on the phone. When I was working and went to Savannah for training … as always … DH and I had the agreement that whichever one went out of town; they were the one to call home. I went out with the other ladies to walk the River Walk, and was late getting back.

    I figured that maybe he had gotten worried that I had not called him the minute I got in. So, I called him, he answered the phone, and it was obvious that he had been sobbing like the world had ended. He could not even talk; I thought the worst and as I slid to the floor and I screamed … “OH GOD! Please tell me is not one of our boys!” No, but, just as bad … Brandy (at the time, our only granddaughter) had been struck by a car and killed. I was told to get up in the morning, go to Jacksonville and get his Mother and come back home. I wanted to leave right then … told me ‘no, too late at night, you’re tired and upset’. I then went down to the other Judge's secretary, that was there with me, and told her what had happened and to tell the instructor why I was not there. I never want to ever go to another “child’s funeral” or to a “double funeral” … like when my former BnL’s parents died in an automobile collision. When I got to my in-laws’ house, my DFnL opened the door for me; and, I started in and he put his hand on my arm and told me, “DON’T cry!” I had good reason to want to ‘throttle’ him.

    He never traveled because of having to wear a urine bag after prostate cancer. I don’t think my DMnL nor I said a word the entire 4+ hour drive back to Albany. She would be a grown woman now, in her mid-20s. I remember when my step-daughter was pregnant with her 2nd child later on; she was talking about how much she’d look like Brandy; and, I told her that she would look nothing like her ... I did not think God would be that cruel. She asked me, 'then what do you think she'll look like'? She will be a 'redhead'. She is ... Mama had dark brown hair, Daddy had blond.

    So the training session was rescheduled and I ended up being flown out to San Antonio, TX and stayed in a tall motel overlooking the “Alamo” … I would have ‘never’ guess in my entire life that it is right in the middle of tall skyscrapers. Loved the River Walk! Motel was luxurious. Everything was ‘expensive’ … but; getting reimbursed for things or taking whatever the daily comp would be helped a whole lot.

    Janetr [again] – Beautiful flowers. On the radio today, they were talking about ‘changing’ things up and not sending ‘red roses’. These are far more beautiful; and, will probably last long. And, you still have all those hearts and can save them. When my DYS and DDnL#2 and DOMGD came at Easter, to surprise us with a visit. Mallory had a big bunch of balloons, hiding behind them. My first thought was … “OH MY GOSH, I have won the Publisher’s Clearing House Grand Prize.” First off my 2 older granddaughters had come down here ‘to talk’. I did not realize that DOGD had been called by my DYS to make sure we were going to be ‘in town’ and ‘if’ she could come home, then we’d have all 4 granddaughter here at the same time. When the bell rang; I asked one of them to go open the door. I had no idea who would have been ringing the door at 4:00pm. Both of them, just started talking like they had not heard me. I was a bit ‘taken aback’ when they told me to ‘go answer the door’ … they could not imagine who would be here, when Louis and Trey were working.
    She pulled the balloons down and showed her face … I let out a holler and Tami called my name and I looked over and she was taking a video. I decided to keep the balloons; so I bought some Styrofoam balls, cut the balloon knots, and stretched them over the balls; took the ribbons and put them all in a glass jar. A constant reminder of my ‘surprise’ visit.

    Yvonne – Maybe you and Cheri can touch base and spend a bit of time together.

    Michele – If you are looking at ‘green seedless’ grapes; Will worked during HS at Harvey’s Supermarket and got promoted to the fruit department because they like his innovative ideas of arranging the fruits and veggies.

    One tip he gave me was that the ‘round’ grapes are bitter; but, the ones that elongated are ‘sweet’. I love grapes; just not ones with seeds; other than our Muscatine’s and Scuppernongs. But, unless Louis puts on some type of fence, or determent, we won’t beat the deer to them. For the past 2 years, right the day before they’d be ‘ripe’ enough to pick, damn if they don’t show up and strip them clean.

    What do you do to ‘refresh’, to see if there are any ‘new’ posts?

    Lenora
  • pipcd34
    pipcd34 Posts: 16,626 Member
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    stats for the day:
    bike ride hm 2 gym- 13.06min, 13.3Amph, 134mhr, 2.9mi = 32c, stopped tracking.
    apple watch- 112c
    SPIN CLASS- 45MIN, 78ar, 98aw, 122ahr, 142mhr, 11-14g, 17.4mi = 353c
    apple watch- 156c stopped midpoint
    bike ride gym 2 dome train station- 6.40min, 149mhr, 12.6amph, 1.4mi = 97c
    apple watch- 65c
    jog station 2 wk- 4.58min, 10.07min mi, 150mhr, .4mi = 75c
    apple watch- 55c
    jog wk 2 sta- 5.15min, 10.15min mi, 150mhr, .5mi = 80c
    apple watch- 58c
    bike ride dome 2 hm- 18.59min, 8.3amph, 2.6mi = 175c
    apple watch- 150c

    total cal 892
  • jmkmomm
    jmkmomm Posts: 3,247 Member
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    Yvonne, I hope it is the elephant penis that you lose. You are to beautiful a woman to have lug that thing around.

    Peach, I hope you are talking about the Prime Minister of Canada you are referring to as so good looking. I was thinking the same thing. I am wondering if that got him any votes.Trump is OK looking but not like the other guy.

    Kim, big hugs to you. I have never had to live in any kind of situation like that so I can not empathise with you. You go with the emotions and care that take care of you. I hope your Mom will understand. She is loving through the blind Mother's eye.

    I am so glad that the only two people in our family with addictions, and they were bad, saw that they needed to change. And boy did they change and have made it their life purpose to facilitate the same kind of change in others. I have a nephew who is an alcoholic. His little boy would bring him a beer out of the fridge and say that he needed to drink it since he always felt better after. It is really odd that when my Dad was in the hospital having his second open heart surgery that took his life that the other nephew who ended up an addict told the older one that he shouldn't see Grandpa because he was drunk. The other nephew is the classic guy who started out with marijuana and worked himself up to heroin and almost died. His doctors told his parents that they should get his affairs in order and pick out his clothes he would wear in a coffin. God was with him and instead of sending his to prison for 5 years he was sent to an inpatient treatment facility. After a year he was out but was on probation for the rest of those 5 years. He knew any offense could make the judge send him to prison for 4 years. He is now in college for a rehab counselor. I am so, so, so proud of those two guys. My fathers death was what facilitated the older nephew and my Mother's death facilitated the younger ones rehab.

    Had my PT re-evaluation today. My strength tests were doubled, and pain levels almost nil except an old pain in my thighs I have had for a long time. So PT only once a week now.

    I think we have made our decision on our gutters and painting. Although cost wise it is cheaper with one company, my gut tells me the other one is better. He has taken the time to come out and look at our doors and tell us that the back door in our garage isn't a normal size, he sent out his painter to look at the house. The cost of the garage door and installation of said door is included. This morning Charlie called the other guy and asked him if he would install garage door, front door and back door in garage for us, he said yes. Price? $0. I just don't trust that. I don't trust he will do it and I don't trust a company that their main emphasis is interior and exterior painting will install those doors for free. So it's the construction company. It is such a relief that that decision has been done. We still don't know if we will have gutter covers or not but the construction said those can be added at any time, any year. Lot of money out for all this, windows, all new exterior doors and all exterior painting. Whew. Now for it to actually happen. It would made me feel better for us to get my hospital bills from December.

    Joyce, Indiana
  • pyanko7
    pyanko7 Posts: 153 Member
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    Sending prayers and hugs to:
    janetr okc - Thinking about your grandson
    both Reid and Olivia - hope both are progressing
    anyone else in need of prayer or a hug.

    Hugs to all. Hope you have a great Valentine's day!
    Paula Y
  • IremiaRe
    IremiaRe Posts: 801 Member
    edited February 2017
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    Pip

    What do you do to ‘refresh’, to see if there are any ‘new’ posts?

    Lenora

    Up where you would type in a web address (top left) - there is a little button to the right - with two green arrows on it... click that. It refreshes the view of the page - bringing up any new entries since you did your thing.

    Warning! IF you refresh before you post your post - anything in the reply box will vanish - so be sure to either refresh before you paste your post, or post first and then refresh.

    I usually get my post all ready to paste, refresh to make sure there is nothing new, and then paste and post.

    Hugs -

    Re in TX
  • megblair1
    megblair1 Posts: 1,218 Member
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    Hi to all. Hope you are doing well. I'm working on a major legal problem here that is consuming me, but I am trying to make some good choices. Take care hugs to all. Meg from sunny Omaha.
  • tekavincent
    tekavincent Posts: 160 Member
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    After today, I think that keeping the diary is pretty much out of the question for at least a week. My whole day has been consumed with making calls to the medical examiner, to the out-of-town mortician, meetings with the local funeral director, and the food coordinator, and the lodging coordinator, and the ..., and the ..., etc. I've barely shed a tear all day, but now as I wind down and begin to reflect in the quiet the tears come easily. I know that this is a downer, but I'm being the strong one here where I live. It seems nearly as expansive as preparing for a wedding, but so much less time when it's sudden like this. Thank you for the well wishes, hugs, etc. I'm thinking that if I can at least check in here once a day, I'll be able to get back on track once we get past the final services next week.
  • suebdew
    suebdew Posts: 1,330 Member
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    Marking my place
  • exermom
    exermom Posts: 6,368 Member
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    Re - what a wonderful find!!! I have no idea why Vince isn't all that crazy about going to FL early. Today he just bought a gallon of milk. uhhhh...it's Monday, will you drink a whole gallon by Friday? I'm hoping he isn't thinking that we're going to go later. I'm planning (meals, etc) that we're leaving Fri and I told him that. As far as the shooting....he has a shooting activity with the Newcomers and that's the night that they shoot. There are supposed to be a few gals there so I guess he's thinking that maybe they'd like me, too? I don't know. But shooting was just a joke. I am going, tho. Maybe he's worried about his eyes? Well, there's nothing that can be done until he sees the eye MD. Maybe he's worried about his vision at night. Well...just leave earlier in the a.m. Problem solved (but I know not to his liking)

    Played mahjongg here. I didn't maj, but that's OK.

    Tried to download audiobooks to have in the car for the drive to FL, but I was having trouble downloading them so I'm supposed to go to the library Thurs. a.m. to have them help me.

    Kim - (((big hug)))

    Lenora - I don't like grapes with seeds in them, either. I'm going to keep what Will had to say in mind. That's a good tip

    Michele in NC
  • GRITSandSLUTSandWINOS
    GRITSandSLUTSandWINOS Posts: 2,573 Member
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    WHEW!!! ... refreshing worked ... I 'thought' I had lost it; but it reappeared.

    gotu52 – Thanks! I love your pictures, I can ‘enjoy’ the snow right from my home and not have to worry about getting ‘out in it’.

    Carol – I’m sure you are talking about the Canadian Prime Minister … RITFLMAO!!!

    Barbie – I remember when I had to be hospitalized so that all my medications could be ‘tweaked’ so I would be able to get better. In group, which was held by this old (80-ish-year-old) Polish man [who went ahead and called himself a "Polack", big around; and, very, very direct (but I liked that). He’d start talking and asking questions and would roll up to everybody and ask them ‘why they were there’. A lot of them were ‘drug addicts’ and/or ‘alcoholics’. The first time he rolled up to me and asked why I was there: I said, “I’m crazy as a loon, got certifiable paperwork and I am here to have my medications tweaked’. He rolled away from me, turned and looked back at me … then turned back to the guy beside me and asked him the same question; his answer was ‘I’m a recovering alcoholic’ … WRONG! Rolled to the next one, ‘drug addict’ … WHAT are you going to do about it? ‘Probably go out and score a hit as soon as I get out of this damn place! WRONG ANSWER; but, the doors are not really locked, you can walk out of here any time you want to. You’re right, people going through crises do have to fall flat on their face [face-plant] … not a pretty picture. He did this all down the line. He was talking about things and every day he would do the same. Roll up to me, ‘oh, I know, you’re crazy’ … down the line. He got in some guy's face one day and the guy was screaming at him, never flinched. I thought the guy was going to knock him out. He then asked him, what the HELL do you want me to say? He said, ‘no, you tell me, why are you here’. This went on back-and-forth for almost the whole session. I put my head in my hands and mumbled under my breath, ‘no, you ARE an alcoholic, you would NOT be here if you were recovering’. He heard me, rolled back the entire length of the room and said, … ‘see, even the certifiably crazy one knows the correct answer’!

    Then there was this Meth-head … whose parents had committed her. She was in the next room; 4 of us shared a split bath. He’d start the session, she would always have a coke or water in a cup and would be drinking it through a straw. She’s get to the bottom and just slurp …. OMG, this got to him, she’d get up, without saying a thing and shuffle across the room, go out, come back, go sit down and slurp again. He told her to ‘get out’! Don’t come back! She looked at him like he could not have possibly been talking to her. He, pointed at her and said, ‘you, get out’. You are not going to be a distraction in here. I don’t want you to come back. She’d get on the phone and beg her parents to come get her. They finally did after about 5 days … no change with her at all.

    Before I could leave, we had to have a 'family meeting'; he drove up and we had our meeting (a week before I was finally able to come home). The next day; he told me one of my conditions of release was I needed to ‘write a poem’ by the end of the next 2 days. He was only 1 of 2 ‘certified grief counselors in the state’. I loved the man. He told us that ‘if’ we ever saw him on the street outside of the office, to never come up to him because he would ‘ignore’ them. He did not take work home with him; he was not going to have it in his face on the street; it was more for ‘our protection and confidentiality' than anything. I can understand that. When I got home, I wrote him a 35-page letter (typed) and sent it to him. He gave it to my PsycheMD; who told me that he had. No problem … it was how I had felt; and, I appreciated what he had taught me.

    I have not had to be put back in the hospital since; that was when my DOGD was a Junior in HS; she is now a Senior in college. I do remember we drove straight back to town and to the school to watch DMGD play softball. My DOGD ran over to me and bear-hugged and rocked me back-and-forth. Louis turned around (when he realized I was not right by him) and said, 'don't you think that's enough'? He turned back around and she bear-hugged me again. I had missed her homecoming court; but, I knew that there would be pictures and videos taken. My 'mental health' was more important for me AND my family. Hard to miss those types of events. But, sometimes you have no choice. Like The Serenity Prayer ... but; maybe a part of being 'on the opposite side'.

    Heather – I am guessing y’all don’t have alligators or crocodiles in your mangrove areas. Water looks very clear. It is cold or nice and just cool enough to be refreshing?

    Michele – “At each other?” [same target?] LOL!

    Marcelyn – I’m so happy you have been able to throw on your pottery wheel. Great NSV.
    I pray that y’all don’t have any tornados tomorrow in Houston. People in Albany still have not gotten over a straight line wind storm on 1/2/17 and a huge-@$$ tornado that first set down near the airport; lifted up, crossed the Flint River and immediately set down, for a 71-mile trip through 6 counties. I ‘think’ it even made National news. Finally, was able to go by our old house in town; and the only damage I saw was the big oak tree right outside the MBR had been uprooted and fell towards the street … that street (might have had a bit of protection with a buffer from the Wetland behind it … I don’t know; but, the big pine tree that had a huge knot in it that sat right over the property line with our neighbor (who refused to take it down, even after we offered to pay ½ … was still standing. They had built on a MBR suite and ‘if’ it had snapped; it would fall right on them. Three blocks over … trees uprooted, lots of house with big trees in them. Went through 2 really ‘nice’ neighborhood – it was awful. Down 3rd Avenue, going towards the hospital uprooted so many old, big live oak trees that had formed a ‘canopy’ over the road. Beautiful street, ‘old money neighborhood’. All these storms and such going on, can be very unsettling for those going through it.

    Kim in Northern California – Dear heart; I don’t doubt one thing you’ve said. I am so sorry you have had to go through all this. I saw it on a fairly regular basis in my job as a paralegal. Divorce/Family matters can certainly bring out the ‘monsters’. That and a 'death' in a family - brings out the 'worst in people, especially if someone thinks there is money in the estate'. It’s hard to turn your back on your DM, especially at her age. But, it is a shame that nothing can be done about DB. I don’t think it is ‘unusual’ for one to have the type of feelings you are having.

    I pray that you are not in that area of California around that dirt damn that is ‘fighting’ to stay together. We had a dirt damn to breech; and, it flooded so bad; that they called it a 500-year-flood. Not that bad since they started keeping records. We ended up staying an extra week down in Miami at my sisters because we could not cross the Fling River that runs right down the center of Albany (GA). My boss would go check on our house and I would call him every afternoon. Not that there was anything that could be done, if it had. Both ends of the 1 block road were flooded. He’d have to walk through yards to be able to see the house. Because he was a Federal Magistrate; they took him ‘up in a helicopter’ to view the area. He said that he had never seen anything like it and hoped to never see something like that again. He won’t have to because he has passed away. I think he ‘enjoyed’ the ride in the helicopter, however. An old cemetery downtown had caskets floating by. Someone had to identify each and every one they found. Not sure how that was done. Been watching news about that damn out in California … that’s massive! I hope they’ll be able to plug the hole … but, that is beginning to sound really ‘iffy’.

    Seems like about the time a place recovers from a big storm or other catastrophe; another one hits.

    Know that you are ‘in all our prayers’. Hopefully, things will settle down and your family can be healed, as much as possible. It's hard when a family member either 'enables' another one or acts like 'nothing is wrong' in a situation. It's probably a 'lot like battered women's syndrome' when they 'think' they are being 'loved' and won't admit what is happening ... or they 'go back because "being taken care of" and not having to go to work' is more important in their sense of 'being taken care of'.

    I have only once been in a relationship that could have turned really ugly; I dated a boy during the summer after I graduated from HS; before moving to go to school. We would go shoot his Dad's pistol. I was old enough to buy ammunition, he wasn't. We were almost out and he wanted me to take him for more bullets. I refused and he pointed it at me. I did not 'cry'; but, I sure as HELL wanted to. My boss at my 'part-time' job; told him that 'if he ever walked into the place ... he'd shoot him himself' and that 'if he did not stop bothering me, we would have a peace bond (restraining order) taken out against him. Of course, that is just a 'piece of paper' and means 'absolutely nothing' ... it is just supposed to make one 'feel better' and to be 'able to call the police and try to have them enforce it'. One of the first things that let me know that he was abusive, is 'being grabbed'. Don't touch me!!!! I'm still pretty much that way. If someone comes up behind me ... especially if they have been messing with me and I have told them to 'leave me alone' ... they better not come at me. I'd beat their @$$ like a wild cat!

    Re – Thanks, I will attempt that and cross my fingers that I don’t lose what I have typed. Right now, my responses are in my WPP.

    I guess this ‘novel’ is sort of a ‘get it off my chest’ … because sometimes it helps. I feel ‘safe’ here.

    Lenora
  • Katla49
    Katla49 Posts: 10,385 Member
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    Janet OKC: You are welcome. I hope you like the recipe and the food you make. :smiley:

    jackies55: Welcome back! Several of us lurk and participate for years. Speaking for myself, I need the support to stay on track. :flowerforyou:

    Michele: When my husband was still able to do it, we went shooting together regularly. Perhaps the cataract surgery will inspire him to go again. Hitting a target is not very likely when you can't see well. :noway:

    Kim: What a horrible situation. You are in my prayers because this hurts you. I watched my parents smoke themselves to death and there was nothing I could do to change things. You are in a similar position in that you can't make your mother or brother take the steps to be physically and emotionally safe & healthy. (((HUGS)))

    Meg in Omaha: I hope the legal situation is resolved in your favor. (((hugs)))


    It has been a good day with no unpleasant surprises or problems. I am grateful. I went to yoga and had a great lesson, and did some grocery shopping with DH. All good.

    HAPPY VALENTINES DAY EVE!

    Katla in beautiful NW Oregon


    “Our greatest weakness lies in giving up. The most certain way to succeed is always to try just one more time.” Thomas A. Edison
  • teklawa1
    teklawa1 Posts: 675 Member
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    <3<3<3 Back home in NW Washington and it is so good to be home. Ella (my pup) and I went for a long walk and then played in the back yard. She loves to retrieve the frisbee and is so proud of herself when she catches it before it hits the ground. Wishing everyone on this site an early Happy Valentines Day. I enjoy everyone's sharing.
    Thanks,
    Betsy NW Washington
  • tngram2seven
    tngram2seven Posts: 465 Member
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    Hugs and prayers for those of you with struggles.

    Hoorays for those celebrating!
  • pipcd34
    pipcd34 Posts: 16,626 Member
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    gz54v5db8nnw.jpg
    Never did show you my knees, they are getting better
  • Poerava14
    Poerava14 Posts: 1,067 Member
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    Tammy: Gorgeous photo of your high mountain snow hiking. Do you wear snowshoes on your hikes?

    Pip: Hope that drama at work gets resolved and you are heard, respected and rewarded. What’s your kitty’s name?

    Jayne: Are you at liberty to share the family tomato soup recipe?

    Michele: I’ve had trigger thumb. Went to a hand specialist who did a quick surgical procedure, and it’s never come back. Have fun in FL. Jealous.

    Leigh: I love cilantro so will definitely try the soup. Merci!

    Katla: Likewise, I’ve printed out the diable recipe. Always nice to have a new way to fix salmon, which I have nicknamed “the chicken of fish”.

    Janetr: Sending prayers for your grandson, and your peace of mind.

    Karen: Continuing to beam good energy toward precious Olivia. Thank you for keeping us posted.

    Kim: Shaking my head. What a challenging family dynamic to endure. Hugs, and huge waves of comforting energy coming your way.

    Meg: Hi there. Hope you’re back here again soon.

    Tekavincent: Hugs. Keep coming back here to discharge some of your anger, tears, pain and hurt. We’ve all been there. We’re all here for you.

    Charleen: I got my tax workbook done over two Sundays. I have a similar filing system as you. What a PIA. Always happy to check that off my to do list.

    Guess who will be getting her colonoscopy at the end of this week? Can hardly wait to get started with the prep….hello jello!

    Stay well friends. We can do this.
    Rori
    Colorado Foothills

    February Resolutions
    HIIT 3 times per week
    Water with lemon daily
    Fast at least 10 days this month
    Practice Reiki daily
    Word for 2017: Attune
  • GRITSandSLUTSandWINOS
    GRITSandSLUTSandWINOS Posts: 2,573 Member
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    REQUEST FOR SOME HELP!

    Oh, I meant to ask y'all; do any of you put up 'jelly, jams, preserves, 'candied fruit'? The reason I ask is my DMnL used to make 'candied figs' and they were small once they cooked down. Both times I have put up 'figs' ... they have not turned out 'candied' like hers always did. I don't know what I am doing 'differently' ... I watcher her put them up for years.

    I put up some pears a couple of years ago. Now that was a 'trip'. They turned out fine (the 2nd time that day). My DH had picked a 5 gallon pail of pears; brought them to the house. I peeled those suckers ... had to be 25 of them. Did my little things; thought they needed a little more cooking and suddenly ... they burned. I tried cleaning up the mess it had made. But, ended up having to throw the pot out with the burned pears in it. I knew that Louis would NOT be a happy camper; so I take this pail back to the other end of the property; picked and filled it up; and trying to get it back to the house ... well ... can you imagine how much a 5 gallon pail of pears weigh? A lot! Got the home, went and bought a 'new' pot; came home, washed and peeled them and cut them up and started over ... this time NOT allowing myself to get distracted. We just finished the last jar. So when the pears come in season ... I will be cooking pears. Do it the same way I have 'attempted' to do my figs; but, my figs end up more like Preserves than 'candied'. Am I used the wrong kind of 'fig'? Am I doing something or not doing something I should, or shouldn't.

    Go pick 'figs' ... bring them home; wash them and pick out any bruised or ones that the birds have pecked; drain them. Put them in a pot; squeeze a couple of lemons into them; cut up the lemons and put the peels in; pour enough sugar over them, to cover good. I don't measure my sugar; like my DMnL ... it is a sound that I go by; it changes the way it sounds when you are pouring the sugar over them. Let them sit, so that the sugar starts melting in the little bit of moisture still on the figs after washing and draining them. Cook and watch them, folding them over; but, not smashing them. I have never been able to get them to look like my DMnL's. She does the same thing; leaves the stems on them; and you could spoon them out; either cutting off the stems to then smash them onto or into whatever you are eating them with. You could also pick them up by the stems and eat them 'like candy'.

    First time I did mine; left the stems on; and they turned to mush! I went through it before I reheated it and cut off as many of the stems as I could find. Lordy what a job! The 2nd time, I just went ahead and cut them off; and, sure enough, they turned to mush. Good; but, still mush ... like 'jam' or 'preserves'. I've Googled "Candied Figs"; but, all that comes up talks about cooking them and then sprinkling them with sugar. That isn't what I am looking for. Any suggestions? Any 'recipes'?

    Thanks!

    Lenora :#
  • GRITSandSLUTSandWINOS
    GRITSandSLUTSandWINOS Posts: 2,573 Member
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    Thanks Re - That worked. I did not 'think' it had, was afraid that my posting (over in my WPP went 'poof'; but, it didn't) ... so; then ... what do I do? Try to cut it in 2 parts because it was LONG, Long, long. That other half, did go 'poof'; but, that is still 'ok' ... "God's arm around my shoulder; and His hand over my mouth!”

    Pip – OOOOOoooooooooooo, that ‘hurts’!

    I've been having "brain farts" all day ... before I chunk my laptop across the room ... I'm bidding ADO to all! Good night; sleep tight! Be rested for whatever you face tomorrow, praying all is well.

    Oh, before I close - had a HS friend who had been married to an physically, abusive, alcoholic @$$-O. She was talking to another HS friend we were spending the weekend with (who is a 'recovering' alcohol) ... how she learned to decide to leave him. She had tried to get him to go to AA meetings. Marriage counselor and 'strongly suggested it'. NOT HIM, he was not an 'alcoholic' ... so she and he teenage children started to go to the 'family meetings' instead. She learned this 'his' alcoholic problem was NOT her fault. The more he drank, the stronger she got until she had his @$$ served with divorce papers and had his butt thrown out of the family home. She made enough to 'take care of herself AND the children' ... she learned she did not have to be his punching bag. BUT, that was a 'conscious choice' she made for herself.

    I'm sure this is just a 'story'; but, my sister claimed that it happened to a friend of hers. I've heard others claim to know the origin of the 'story'.

    Man drinks and when he drinks, he get physically abusive to his wife. She's is pregnant with their 3rd child. When he does 'beat' her ... he is careful not to hit her where it would show. No black eyes; but, her torso looking like one of those long kicking type of punching bad. So, one night he comes and is drunk and getting physical; she tells him to 'just go to bed'. So he drags his drunk butt up to the bedroom and passes out across the bed. She wraps him up in the bed sheets and ties the sheets to be opposite bedposts. Goes and gets her son's baseball bat and beats the HELL out of him; he is so drunk he is totally passed out. She unwraps him and makes the bed up around him, leaving him passed out on the bed. The next morning he stubbles out of the bedroom the next morning and swears he will never drink that way again, because he felt like he had been beaten. She says, 'now you know how I feel when you come home drunk - like a punching bag'. They eventually get a divorce. Moral of the story: You don't have to beat him where the bruises will show; he'd be too embarrassed to tell anybody he had been beaten by a woman when he can barely sit down at work.

    Lenora
  • janetr7476
    janetr7476 Posts: 4,001 Member
    edited February 2017
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    Pip - Oh goodness your poor knees look so sore and I'm truly very sorry for that, BUT I do have a request. As soon as those knees are all healed up, can I have your legs???

    Janetr OKC