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MFP Personals

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Replies

  • Cerealsensei
    Cerealsensei Posts: 1,625 Member
    Looking for somebody to stroke my beard and feed me cereal
  • captainfantastic94
    captainfantastic94 Posts: 1,745 Member
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  • an0nemus
    an0nemus Posts: 149 Member
    I'm not looking for a mate...but I am looking for a sugar free, fat free, gluten free, organic, farmer friendly cheesecake that tastes like the real thing and is free.
  • an0nemus
    an0nemus Posts: 149 Member
    Muscle_for_Fitness wrote: »
    If you need a Woo, give me a holler

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  • nunezj01
    nunezj01 Posts: 13 Member
    I'm always up for meal prepping, and staying in because we can't walk after our leg day. Who's down?!
  • slimgirljo15
    slimgirljo15 Posts: 269,456 Member
    Monkey_Business wrote: »
    A tall well-built man with good
    reputation, who can cook frogs
    legs, who appreciates a good fuc-
    shia garden, classical music and tal-
    king without getting too serious.
    But please only read lines 1, 3, and 5

    :laugh:
  • captainfantastic94
    captainfantastic94 Posts: 1,745 Member
    Timshel_ wrote: »
    Married annoyingly positive manic depressive with average junk and money seeking young uninhibited online girl for intelligent conversation and discussion about morality. High quality photo/video camera required for clear messaging in non-verbal communication. Must be available during later hours and flexible.

    Must like one syllable words, hanging plants, and be able to fix a 1980's Volvo coupe with nothing more than a chewing gum wrapper, a paper clip, and celery salt. Must have all teeth.

    Apply within.

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  • ekim2016
    ekim2016 Posts: 1,199 Member
    or "coo" button for sweet nothings in the ear....
  • SomebodyWakeUpHIcks
    SomebodyWakeUpHIcks Posts: 3,836 Member
    @Ay_posty have you thought about posting here?
  • Ay_posty
    Ay_posty Posts: 26 Member
    SomebodyWakeUpHIcks wrote: »
    @Ay_posty have you thought about posting here?

    Lmfao definitely not xD
  • VanishingNachos
    VanishingNachos Posts: 5,688 Member
    If you love pina coladas, and walks in the rain - if you're not into yoga and if you have half a brain - if you like making love at midnite in the dunes at the cape - I'm the love that you are looking for -

    call meh~

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  • AskMorphis
    AskMorphis Posts: 155 Member
    I have teeth, and I put on shoes when I go outdoors. One of my great passions in life is to breathe : I've almost been doing it since I was born. I sleep with my eyes closed, I open them for almost 15 hours per day, and close them regularly during the day. Be warned : I have hair, and yes, I do possess lips. I produce blood, saliva, ear wax, and other bodily fluids. I talk with my mouth and larynx, and I'm searching for someone with whom I share those characteristics.

    If anyone is interested, feel free to contact me, we can go in further details if you wish.
  • Monkey_Business
    Monkey_Business Posts: 1,800 Member
    Single male seeks double-jointed
    supermodel who owns a brewery
    and grows her own pot. Access
    to free concert tickets a plus, as is
    having open minded twin sister.
  • erica_today
    erica_today Posts: 185 Member
    If you enjoy the smell of freshly baked banana bread, wasted dreams, responsibility and quite possibly a gas leak in the middle of the night once your insurance policy starts then you came to the right place.

    Please inquire with your job title and credit score.

  • Timshel_
    Timshel_ Posts: 22,834 Member
    Vinehausen wrote: »
    Timshel_ wrote: »
    Married annoyingly positive manic depressive with average junk and money seeking young uninhibited online girl for intelligent conversation and discussion about morality. High quality photo/video camera required for clear messaging in non-verbal communication. Must be available during later hours and flexible.

    Must like one syllable words, hanging plants, and be able to fix a 1980's Volvo coupe with nothing more than a chewing gum wrapper, a paper clip, and celery salt. Must have all teeth.

    Apply within.

    I know a woman who would be all over this.
    *I am not that woman btw.

    they-do-exist-santa-they-do-exist.jpg
  • 123liveoak
    123liveoak Posts: 2,239 Member
    *likes wine
    *good at changing light bulbs (except that one time)
    *can cry into a nice bottle of wine
    *almost always never does laundry
    *looking for that special one to help me polish off a basket of hot wings

    ***this reads like my real profile :smiley:
  • FabulousFantasticFifty
    FabulousFantasticFifty Posts: 195,832 Member
    Looking for a Woman in charge? If so... that's me! Short, curvy Redhead with a stubborn streak who will take no shytte! Holds grudges and will hunt you down if you pi$$ me off! Independent and always right... so don't be trying to boss me around Beyotch! I may wear dresses and heels but also wear the Pants in the family!

    Sound like your dream Girl??? Call me! :joy:

    PS if you are this guy... Definitely call me! ;):tongue:
    FabulousFantasticFifty wrote: »
    Since I usually list Personality traits I'm going all physical this time around ;)

    The smile is the first thing that attracts me...clean and white! He has to smell clean and delicious, :yum: Love Dark hair with lighter contrasting eyes especially blue :love: has to have Strong muscular but not huge arms, shoulders and back, a great tush (No flat bottoms for me) ;) Scruff or beard, and enough hair that I can grab onto :bigsmile: oh... And I forgot... Love lips especially a bottom lip I can bite onto... :naughty:

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