Absurd Headlines
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            SabotageinStilettos wrote: »gardengnomemanifesto wrote: »This just in: Bigfoot seen making out with Shaquille O’Neil at Olive Garden
Times Square Olive Garden?
In Texas1 - 
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            Kim Kardashian is running for Senate! Mrs. West announced Behind The Scenes in the new season of KUWTK0
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            Woman on Internet forum finds out man’s roommate actually his wife0
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            90-year old Woman Attacks Eiffel Tower with Baguette. Tower Pressing Charges.1
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            Mean man on internet found to be passive aggressive wimpy underachiever in real life2
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            “THIS IS AN OUTRAGE” STATES OUTRAGED PERSON1
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            Ice cream diet doesn’t work, scientists say.2
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            Know it all health/fitness db dissected for science, nothing but Kit-Kats and Twinkies found inside.0
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            Is Wonderwall’s “I don’t believe that anybody feels the way I do about you now” the world’s most profound song lyric? We asked Ozzy Osbourne - more at 110
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            i_squat_for_pizza wrote: »A pervert spotted waving his salami in the meat section of supermarket tells cops he was stealing sausages.
*whistles inconspicuously*1 - 
            Child support case over mfp ebaby goes to Supreme Court0
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            Man uses long beard for clothing0
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            Man discovers self image in stick of butter0
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            Man hires security company to protect coconut trees on island from coconut oil pirates0
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            Ta-co-bout Messy! World's Most Beloved Taco Stand Doused in Mustard. Investigation Ongoing.0
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            Three Scooter pile up at local Walmart prompts store to post speed limits in aisles1
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            gardengnomemanifesto wrote: »Three Scooter pile up at local Walmart prompts store to post speed limits in aisles
But was there a fight? Inquiring minds want to know?0 - 
            Dude Ate A Banana.
FTW.2 - 
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            Newly invented dog translator reveals Fido actually hates you. Details at 11.1
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            Male cat drops to clean genitals, Woman in vicinity claims harassment1
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            Man has 5% battery left, sends dramatic message to love interest as if he’s dying0
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            Kevin Spacey likes women0
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            Man afraid of his own penis has heart attack when he gets an erection1
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            gardengnomemanifesto wrote: »Man afraid of his own penis has heart attack when he gets an erection
It went straight to his head1 
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