The Official MFP Love Match Thread for Totally Not Nude People
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_BlahBlah_BlackSheep_ wrote: »CookingWithCumin wrote: »_BlahBlah_BlackSheep_ wrote: »_BlahBlah_BlackSheep_ wrote: »standenvernet wrote: »CaptainFantastic01 wrote: »The fact of the matter here, folks, is that we simply know better than you. It's that simple. Oh sure, some people, who shall remain nameless - *cough* - seem to believe themselves to be the shadchans of MFP. They are mistaken. Only we chosen few, we happy few, we kilt-wearing chewers of caq have been blessed with the divine vision to make the choices here in this thread that carry the weight of God himself.
Thus sayeth the Swan.
You are hilarious.
Not the best matchmaker though.
How DARE you question @SwannySez . Do you know how difficult it is to find a match for an owner of 4 parrots?Oh, I guess maybe you do know.
The parrots are an asset. They are not why I'm single. Lol. Who wouldn't want 4 adorably fluffy potty trained birds around?
You would or wouldn't want to be around the fluffers?
Fluffers I can deal with, but live birds?
Hey, @SwannySez , since your match for me classifies me as an undesirably geriatric, can I get a refund on my payment, or is there some kinda of "exchange" program?
Oh c'mon, now. You're not so old that you need a fluffer. No one here buys that.
But since we do not stand for age discrimination in these parts, we will find you another match.
Hey, hey, hey!! My match was already matched a second time with someone else and then rejected her. I'm still waiting for my rematch!
You've heard the saying "the squeaky wheel gets the grease"? That *kitten* don't fly in these here parts, lady. We're more akin to kindergarten: you get what you get and you don't get upset.
Hey, it's not my fault you matched me with someone who wants to stay single! That's gotta be against the rules or something.
IF ITS MEANT TO BEEEE ITLL BEEEEE ITLLL BEEEE
BABY JUST LET IT BE
So far this thread is ending up eerily similar to my actual dating life....
0 -
CookingWithCumin wrote: »_BlahBlah_BlackSheep_ wrote: »CookingWithCumin wrote: »_BlahBlah_BlackSheep_ wrote: »_BlahBlah_BlackSheep_ wrote: »standenvernet wrote: »CaptainFantastic01 wrote: »The fact of the matter here, folks, is that we simply know better than you. It's that simple. Oh sure, some people, who shall remain nameless - *cough* - seem to believe themselves to be the shadchans of MFP. They are mistaken. Only we chosen few, we happy few, we kilt-wearing chewers of caq have been blessed with the divine vision to make the choices here in this thread that carry the weight of God himself.
Thus sayeth the Swan.
You are hilarious.
Not the best matchmaker though.
How DARE you question @SwannySez . Do you know how difficult it is to find a match for an owner of 4 parrots?Oh, I guess maybe you do know.
The parrots are an asset. They are not why I'm single. Lol. Who wouldn't want 4 adorably fluffy potty trained birds around?
You would or wouldn't want to be around the fluffers?
Fluffers I can deal with, but live birds?
Hey, @SwannySez , since your match for me classifies me as an undesirably geriatric, can I get a refund on my payment, or is there some kinda of "exchange" program?
Oh c'mon, now. You're not so old that you need a fluffer. No one here buys that.
But since we do not stand for age discrimination in these parts, we will find you another match.
Hey, hey, hey!! My match was already matched a second time with someone else and then rejected her. I'm still waiting for my rematch!
You've heard the saying "the squeaky wheel gets the grease"? That *kitten* don't fly in these here parts, lady. We're more akin to kindergarten: you get what you get and you don't get upset.
Hey, it's not my fault you matched me with someone who wants to stay single! That's gotta be against the rules or something.
IF ITS MEANT TO BEEEE ITLL BEEEEE ITLLL BEEEE
BABY JUST LET IT BE
So far this thread is ending up eerily similar to my actual dating life....
You looked a gift horse in the mouth and complained about it all the way home?
2 -
CookingWithCumin wrote: »_BlahBlah_BlackSheep_ wrote: »CookingWithCumin wrote: »_BlahBlah_BlackSheep_ wrote: »_BlahBlah_BlackSheep_ wrote: »standenvernet wrote: »CaptainFantastic01 wrote: »The fact of the matter here, folks, is that we simply know better than you. It's that simple. Oh sure, some people, who shall remain nameless - *cough* - seem to believe themselves to be the shadchans of MFP. They are mistaken. Only we chosen few, we happy few, we kilt-wearing chewers of caq have been blessed with the divine vision to make the choices here in this thread that carry the weight of God himself.
Thus sayeth the Swan.
You are hilarious.
Not the best matchmaker though.
How DARE you question @SwannySez . Do you know how difficult it is to find a match for an owner of 4 parrots?Oh, I guess maybe you do know.
The parrots are an asset. They are not why I'm single. Lol. Who wouldn't want 4 adorably fluffy potty trained birds around?
You would or wouldn't want to be around the fluffers?
Fluffers I can deal with, but live birds?
Hey, @SwannySez , since your match for me classifies me as an undesirably geriatric, can I get a refund on my payment, or is there some kinda of "exchange" program?
Oh c'mon, now. You're not so old that you need a fluffer. No one here buys that.
But since we do not stand for age discrimination in these parts, we will find you another match.
Hey, hey, hey!! My match was already matched a second time with someone else and then rejected her. I'm still waiting for my rematch!
You've heard the saying "the squeaky wheel gets the grease"? That *kitten* don't fly in these here parts, lady. We're more akin to kindergarten: you get what you get and you don't get upset.
Hey, it's not my fault you matched me with someone who wants to stay single! That's gotta be against the rules or something.
IF ITS MEANT TO BEEEE ITLL BEEEEE ITLLL BEEEE
BABY JUST LET IT BE
So far this thread is ending up eerily similar to my actual dating life....
You looked a gift horse in the mouth and complained about it all the way home?
I was gonna go with the thing about "If you meet a *kitten* in the morning, you met a *kitten*. If you keep running into *kittens* all *kitten* day, the *kitten* might just be you" but let's stick with yours.1 -
bigbandjohn wrote: »HappilyDistracted wrote: »standenvernet wrote: »CaptainFantastic01 wrote: »The fact of the matter here, folks, is that we simply know better than you. It's that simple. Oh sure, some people, who shall remain nameless - *cough* - seem to believe themselves to be the shadchans of MFP. They are mistaken. Only we chosen few, we happy few, we kilt-wearing chewers of caq have been blessed with the divine vision to make the choices here in this thread that carry the weight of God himself.
Thus sayeth the Swan.
You are hilarious.
Not the best matchmaker though.
How DARE you question @SwannySez . Do you know how difficult it is to find a match for an owner of 4 parrots?Oh, I guess maybe you do know.
The parrots are an asset. They are not why I'm single. Lol. Who wouldn't want 4 adorably fluffy potty trained birds around?
You would or wouldn't want to be around the fluffers?
Fluffers I can deal with, but live birds?
Hey, @SwannySez , since your match for me classifies me as an undesirably geriatric, can I get a refund on my payment, or is there some kinda of "exchange" program?
Agreed.
Fluffers yes. Birds no.
Not that the dogs wouldn't enjoy chasing them around the house. It would be entertaining while it lasted.
How about a fluffernutter?
I have never tried a fluffernutter. But I do enjoy things with a white creamy inside.2 -
ok. Don't believe I get to say this, rather than being told this.... First time ever....._BlahBlah_BlackSheep_ wrote: »CookingWithCumin wrote: »_BlahBlah_BlackSheep_ wrote: »_BlahBlah_BlackSheep_ wrote: »standenvernet wrote: »CaptainFantastic01 wrote: »The fact of the matter here, folks, is that we simply know better than you. It's that simple. Oh sure, some people, who shall remain nameless - *cough* - seem to believe themselves to be the shadchans of MFP. They are mistaken. Only we chosen few, we happy few, we kilt-wearing chewers of caq have been blessed with the divine vision to make the choices here in this thread that carry the weight of God himself.
Thus sayeth the Swan.
You are hilarious.
Not the best matchmaker though.
How DARE you question @SwannySez . Do you know how difficult it is to find a match for an owner of 4 parrots?Oh, I guess maybe you do know.
The parrots are an asset. They are not why I'm single. Lol. Who wouldn't want 4 adorably fluffy potty trained birds around?
You would or wouldn't want to be around the fluffers?
Fluffers I can deal with, but live birds?
Hey, @SwannySez , since your match for me classifies me as an undesirably geriatric, can I get a refund on my payment, or is there some kinda of "exchange" program?
Oh c'mon, now. You're not so old that you need a fluffer. No one here buys that.
But since we do not stand for age discrimination in these parts, we will find you another match.
Hey, hey, hey!! My match was already matched a second time with someone else and then rejected her. I'm still waiting for my rematch!
You've heard the saying "the squeaky wheel gets the grease"? That *kitten* don't fly in these here parts, lady. We're more akin to kindergarten: you get what you get and you don't get upset.
Hey, it's not my fault you matched me with someone who wants to stay single! That's gotta be against the rules or something.
IF ITS MEANT TO BEEEE ITLL BEEEEE ITLLL BEEEE
BABY JUST LET IT BE
So far this thread is ending up eerily similar to my actual dating life....
@_BlahBlah_BlackSheep_ - sorry for your troubles. If I wasn't already with @HappilyDistracted I'd certainly volunteer for you.0 -
CookingWithCumin wrote: »bigbandjohn wrote: »ummmm... no.CookingWithCumin wrote: »
Oh she's gonna love that. Perfect match already.
Ha he doesn’t know what he’s missing. What man in his right mind could pass on such a troll like lard assed quadruple chinned mustached beauty such as myself? Alas, my heart shall go on.0 -
HappilyDistracted wrote: »bigbandjohn wrote: »HappilyDistracted wrote: »standenvernet wrote: »CaptainFantastic01 wrote: »The fact of the matter here, folks, is that we simply know better than you. It's that simple. Oh sure, some people, who shall remain nameless - *cough* - seem to believe themselves to be the shadchans of MFP. They are mistaken. Only we chosen few, we happy few, we kilt-wearing chewers of caq have been blessed with the divine vision to make the choices here in this thread that carry the weight of God himself.
Thus sayeth the Swan.
You are hilarious.
Not the best matchmaker though.
How DARE you question @SwannySez . Do you know how difficult it is to find a match for an owner of 4 parrots?Oh, I guess maybe you do know.
The parrots are an asset. They are not why I'm single. Lol. Who wouldn't want 4 adorably fluffy potty trained birds around?
You would or wouldn't want to be around the fluffers?
Fluffers I can deal with, but live birds?
Hey, @SwannySez , since your match for me classifies me as an undesirably geriatric, can I get a refund on my payment, or is there some kinda of "exchange" program?
Agreed.
Fluffers yes. Birds no.
Not that the dogs wouldn't enjoy chasing them around the house. It would be entertaining while it lasted.
How about a fluffernutter?
I have never tried a fluffernutter. But I do enjoy things with a white creamy inside.
can't wait to see you....
3 -
CookingWithCumin wrote: »bigbandjohn wrote: »ummmm... no.CookingWithCumin wrote: »
Oh she's gonna love that. Perfect match already.
Ha he doesn’t know what he’s missing. What man in his right mind could pass on such a troll like lard assed quadruple chinned mustached beauty such as myself? Alas, my heart shall go on.
You see, there was this thing that happened with me and a particle accelerator, some plutonium, a cup of tea and the Krampus one Christmas when I was a kid.... just.... don't want to remember..... No offense.0 -
DickVernon wrote: »@SabAteNine wrote: »DickVernon wrote: »So, @SabAteNine , since we have been matched, there’s a few things I need to know about you.
1. Do you replace empty toilet paper?
2. Do you like piña colada’s?
3. Getting caught in the rain?- Are you kidding me?! Toilet paper stands with a minimum of 2 TP rolls are *mandatory* - and, of course, kept up. Also, the use of Zewa flushable toilet paper tubes is a must. It's all about convenience and comfort in there. Contrary to popular middle-school belief, women go number 2 as well.
- You know Dick, I'm not big on fancy stuff. Beer, wine, whiskey and bitters. Those are my things. And they're kind of at the base of Maslow's pyramid.
- Yes, often. And still, the most time I owned an umbrella before losing / abandoning it was 2 days.
My turn.- Are you high maintenance? Maybe helpless and in need of hand holding when you're sick?
- Do you feel the need to fill every moment with *something*? Is procrastination or silence making you uncomfortable?
- What's the one thing you're really, REALLY bad at?
1. No. I change my oil every 25k miles
2. No. I like uncomfortable periods
of silence
3. Lifting the lid.
1 good, 2 good, 3 needs work.
Not a 5/7, but I'll take it.0 -
bigbandjohn wrote: »ok. Don't believe I get to say this, rather than being told this.... First time ever....._BlahBlah_BlackSheep_ wrote: »CookingWithCumin wrote: »_BlahBlah_BlackSheep_ wrote: »_BlahBlah_BlackSheep_ wrote: »standenvernet wrote: »CaptainFantastic01 wrote: »The fact of the matter here, folks, is that we simply know better than you. It's that simple. Oh sure, some people, who shall remain nameless - *cough* - seem to believe themselves to be the shadchans of MFP. They are mistaken. Only we chosen few, we happy few, we kilt-wearing chewers of caq have been blessed with the divine vision to make the choices here in this thread that carry the weight of God himself.
Thus sayeth the Swan.
You are hilarious.
Not the best matchmaker though.
How DARE you question @SwannySez . Do you know how difficult it is to find a match for an owner of 4 parrots?Oh, I guess maybe you do know.
The parrots are an asset. They are not why I'm single. Lol. Who wouldn't want 4 adorably fluffy potty trained birds around?
You would or wouldn't want to be around the fluffers?
Fluffers I can deal with, but live birds?
Hey, @SwannySez , since your match for me classifies me as an undesirably geriatric, can I get a refund on my payment, or is there some kinda of "exchange" program?
Oh c'mon, now. You're not so old that you need a fluffer. No one here buys that.
But since we do not stand for age discrimination in these parts, we will find you another match.
Hey, hey, hey!! My match was already matched a second time with someone else and then rejected her. I'm still waiting for my rematch!
You've heard the saying "the squeaky wheel gets the grease"? That *kitten* don't fly in these here parts, lady. We're more akin to kindergarten: you get what you get and you don't get upset.
Hey, it's not my fault you matched me with someone who wants to stay single! That's gotta be against the rules or something.
IF ITS MEANT TO BEEEE ITLL BEEEEE ITLLL BEEEE
BABY JUST LET IT BE
So far this thread is ending up eerily similar to my actual dating life....
@_BlahBlah_BlackSheep_ - sorry for your troubles. If I wasn't already with @HappilyDistracted I'd certainly volunteer for you.
@bigbandjohn so no triad yet?0 -
bigbandjohn wrote: »CookingWithCumin wrote: »bigbandjohn wrote: »ummmm... no.CookingWithCumin wrote: »
Oh she's gonna love that. Perfect match already.
Ha he doesn’t know what he’s missing. What man in his right mind could pass on such a troll like lard assed quadruple chinned mustached beauty such as myself? Alas, my heart shall go on.
You see, there was this thing that happened with me and a particle accelerator, some plutonium, a cup of tea and the Krampus one Christmas when I was a kid.... just.... don't want to remember..... No offense.
Too late. I’m heart broken. My bountiful bosom is heaving as I cry and bite the side of my luscious red lips. I’m sure @CookingWithCumin and @SwannySez will offer me comfort.0 -
HappilyDistracted wrote: »bigbandjohn wrote: »ok. Don't believe I get to say this, rather than being told this.... First time ever....._BlahBlah_BlackSheep_ wrote: »CookingWithCumin wrote: »_BlahBlah_BlackSheep_ wrote: »_BlahBlah_BlackSheep_ wrote: »standenvernet wrote: »CaptainFantastic01 wrote: »The fact of the matter here, folks, is that we simply know better than you. It's that simple. Oh sure, some people, who shall remain nameless - *cough* - seem to believe themselves to be the shadchans of MFP. They are mistaken. Only we chosen few, we happy few, we kilt-wearing chewers of caq have been blessed with the divine vision to make the choices here in this thread that carry the weight of God himself.
Thus sayeth the Swan.
You are hilarious.
Not the best matchmaker though.
How DARE you question @SwannySez . Do you know how difficult it is to find a match for an owner of 4 parrots?Oh, I guess maybe you do know.
The parrots are an asset. They are not why I'm single. Lol. Who wouldn't want 4 adorably fluffy potty trained birds around?
You would or wouldn't want to be around the fluffers?
Fluffers I can deal with, but live birds?
Hey, @SwannySez , since your match for me classifies me as an undesirably geriatric, can I get a refund on my payment, or is there some kinda of "exchange" program?
Oh c'mon, now. You're not so old that you need a fluffer. No one here buys that.
But since we do not stand for age discrimination in these parts, we will find you another match.
Hey, hey, hey!! My match was already matched a second time with someone else and then rejected her. I'm still waiting for my rematch!
You've heard the saying "the squeaky wheel gets the grease"? That *kitten* don't fly in these here parts, lady. We're more akin to kindergarten: you get what you get and you don't get upset.
Hey, it's not my fault you matched me with someone who wants to stay single! That's gotta be against the rules or something.
IF ITS MEANT TO BEEEE ITLL BEEEEE ITLLL BEEEE
BABY JUST LET IT BE
So far this thread is ending up eerily similar to my actual dating life....
@_BlahBlah_BlackSheep_ - sorry for your troubles. If I wasn't already with @HappilyDistracted I'd certainly volunteer for you.
@bigbandjohn so no triad yet?
Well, whomever is selected we should both agree. I'm all about making sure everyone involved is happy.1 -
im just trynna get cuffed before ya'll tax refunds hit.
need someone willing to take me out to dinner and a show, maybe buy me some new dancing shoes at least.
in return im gonna be willing to drop you off at work, run you a hug in public, text you smiley faces at least 3 times a day. we can negotiate all the details later on tbh it ain't that important.
once the money is spent though i am GONE don't even pretend to know me wit ya broke azz.
The treasury is closed: no tax refunds currently.1 -
Bullet_with_Butterfly_Wings wrote: »Clearly, I can't be matched... or maybe I can't be matched 🤔
Funny that you should pop in at just this EXACT moment. I didn't realize that you wanted a match. But since you do and since we have a jilted man rebouncing like a rubber biscuit, I hereby declare that @Bullet_with_Butterfly_Wings and @standenvernet to be matched now and forever more.
Can you feel it babies?
It's the love! The LOVE!
OK, @Bullet_with_Butterfly_Wings ... How can I disappoint you? Do you have a shopping list or a questionnaire that we could use to evaluate my inadequacies?
3 -
bigbandjohn wrote: »HappilyDistracted wrote: »bigbandjohn wrote: »ok. Don't believe I get to say this, rather than being told this.... First time ever....._BlahBlah_BlackSheep_ wrote: »CookingWithCumin wrote: »_BlahBlah_BlackSheep_ wrote: »_BlahBlah_BlackSheep_ wrote: »standenvernet wrote: »CaptainFantastic01 wrote: »The fact of the matter here, folks, is that we simply know better than you. It's that simple. Oh sure, some people, who shall remain nameless - *cough* - seem to believe themselves to be the shadchans of MFP. They are mistaken. Only we chosen few, we happy few, we kilt-wearing chewers of caq have been blessed with the divine vision to make the choices here in this thread that carry the weight of God himself.
Thus sayeth the Swan.
You are hilarious.
Not the best matchmaker though.
How DARE you question @SwannySez . Do you know how difficult it is to find a match for an owner of 4 parrots?Oh, I guess maybe you do know.
The parrots are an asset. They are not why I'm single. Lol. Who wouldn't want 4 adorably fluffy potty trained birds around?
You would or wouldn't want to be around the fluffers?
Fluffers I can deal with, but live birds?
Hey, @SwannySez , since your match for me classifies me as an undesirably geriatric, can I get a refund on my payment, or is there some kinda of "exchange" program?
Oh c'mon, now. You're not so old that you need a fluffer. No one here buys that.
But since we do not stand for age discrimination in these parts, we will find you another match.
Hey, hey, hey!! My match was already matched a second time with someone else and then rejected her. I'm still waiting for my rematch!
You've heard the saying "the squeaky wheel gets the grease"? That *kitten* don't fly in these here parts, lady. We're more akin to kindergarten: you get what you get and you don't get upset.
Hey, it's not my fault you matched me with someone who wants to stay single! That's gotta be against the rules or something.
IF ITS MEANT TO BEEEE ITLL BEEEEE ITLLL BEEEE
BABY JUST LET IT BE
So far this thread is ending up eerily similar to my actual dating life....
@_BlahBlah_BlackSheep_ - sorry for your troubles. If I wasn't already with @HappilyDistracted I'd certainly volunteer for you.
@bigbandjohn so no triad yet?
Well, whomever is selected we should both agree. I'm all about making sure everyone involved is happy.
@HappilyDistracted don't let him go. Not with that attitude.0 -
RhiAnLewis17 wrote: »bigbandjohn wrote: »HappilyDistracted wrote: »bigbandjohn wrote: »ok. Don't believe I get to say this, rather than being told this.... First time ever....._BlahBlah_BlackSheep_ wrote: »CookingWithCumin wrote: »_BlahBlah_BlackSheep_ wrote: »_BlahBlah_BlackSheep_ wrote: »standenvernet wrote: »CaptainFantastic01 wrote: »The fact of the matter here, folks, is that we simply know better than you. It's that simple. Oh sure, some people, who shall remain nameless - *cough* - seem to believe themselves to be the shadchans of MFP. They are mistaken. Only we chosen few, we happy few, we kilt-wearing chewers of caq have been blessed with the divine vision to make the choices here in this thread that carry the weight of God himself.
Thus sayeth the Swan.
You are hilarious.
Not the best matchmaker though.
How DARE you question @SwannySez . Do you know how difficult it is to find a match for an owner of 4 parrots?Oh, I guess maybe you do know.
The parrots are an asset. They are not why I'm single. Lol. Who wouldn't want 4 adorably fluffy potty trained birds around?
You would or wouldn't want to be around the fluffers?
Fluffers I can deal with, but live birds?
Hey, @SwannySez , since your match for me classifies me as an undesirably geriatric, can I get a refund on my payment, or is there some kinda of "exchange" program?
Oh c'mon, now. You're not so old that you need a fluffer. No one here buys that.
But since we do not stand for age discrimination in these parts, we will find you another match.
Hey, hey, hey!! My match was already matched a second time with someone else and then rejected her. I'm still waiting for my rematch!
You've heard the saying "the squeaky wheel gets the grease"? That *kitten* don't fly in these here parts, lady. We're more akin to kindergarten: you get what you get and you don't get upset.
Hey, it's not my fault you matched me with someone who wants to stay single! That's gotta be against the rules or something.
IF ITS MEANT TO BEEEE ITLL BEEEEE ITLLL BEEEE
BABY JUST LET IT BE
So far this thread is ending up eerily similar to my actual dating life....
@_BlahBlah_BlackSheep_ - sorry for your troubles. If I wasn't already with @HappilyDistracted I'd certainly volunteer for you.
@bigbandjohn so no triad yet?
Well, whomever is selected we should both agree. I'm all about making sure everyone involved is happy.
@HappilyDistracted don't let him go. Not with that attitude.
Pretty sure I saw him on the news yesterday, licking a doorbell for 3 hours straight.https://www.independent.co.uk/news/world/americas/man-licking-doorbell-intercom-camera-video-california-a8718571.htmlAnd THIS TIME the dude is not from Florida!
Agreed. @RhiAnLewis17 I shall keep @bigbandjohn
@denny_mac That only makes things better. Gotta know what you're getting before you buy in fully.1
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