WOMEN AGES 50+ FOR JANUARY 2021

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  • Katla49
    Katla49 Posts: 10,385 Member
    <3
  • bananasandoranges
    bananasandoranges Posts: 2,410 Member
    @grandmallie Glad you are enjoying home. Why do you not want to take melatonin. I take stuff like that rarely but sometimes it really helps. Valerian (a plant) is really known to help sleep too.

  • bananasandoranges
    bananasandoranges Posts: 2,410 Member
    Couldn't get to sleep well last night, had to work late so that might have come in to play. I was dozing off at midnight but then wide awake a bit later. and awake early. probably got 5 hours or SO of sleep, not massive for me, but not my worst. I'm not teaching and have no meetings today, so it makes it easier. I have plenty to do, but not a firm time schedule. mostly have to calculate and send some grades today (with details). as absolute deadline. some of the rest is more flexible. I'm gonna keep my rhythm of 16 texts corrected per day. that makes about 2h plus other time on line to sort stuff out around.

    Feel like sleeping but it just after sunrise so I like to go out for even a short walk to start the day and not let myself get too out of sync, time-wise, hopefully. A big risk when living in a big city (so no private garden/yard and less nature) during lockdown (risk of being online late).
  • bananasandoranges
    bananasandoranges Posts: 2,410 Member
    For fun question We talked about topless a few months ago and there were many stories. Have you ever gone, or do you ever go commando? (no underpants when going out, wearing trousers or..a skirt or dress)? I guess you can't call it commando when in a nudist colony, right?
  • Machka9
    Machka9 Posts: 24,799 Member
    @grandmallie Glad you are enjoying home. Why do you not want to take melatonin. I take stuff like that rarely but sometimes it really helps. Valerian (a plant) is really known to help sleep too.

    I use Valerian quite frequently, although not so much recently because I've been so tired that I sleep anywhere!

    Some allergy medications also put me to sleep.


    M in Oz
  • Machka9
    Machka9 Posts: 24,799 Member
    For fun question We talked about topless a few months ago and there were many stories. Have you ever gone, or do you ever go commando? (no underpants when going out, wearing trousers or..a skirt or dress)? I guess you can't call it commando when in a nudist colony, right?

    Always when cycling. :)
  • Machka9
    Machka9 Posts: 24,799 Member
    edited January 2021
    Freedom!!


    os9yi4b549z9.png


    M in Oz
  • bananasandoranges
    bananasandoranges Posts: 2,410 Member
    My sister (a nurse, not that it makes a difference) only takes Half a valerian (herbal) capsule because otherwise she feels too sleepy the next morning!


    Here's a published article in nytimes on How to manage New-Year expectations

    Most of the text is based on studies of people who were imprisoned or hostages and other contexts pertinent to the current context. (of course it's not as bad a prison for most people but there are some common points indicated).

    I put the whole text here because nytimes is free only for 1st 4 articles (per software program used to be, not sure anymore- 4 on safari, 4 on chrome, etc)
    Ah, New Year’s Eve is fast approaching, and it’s finally time to leave the wreckage of 2020 behind. Except for many people, it seems as if not much will change except the year on the calendar, making the new year feel about as much of a refresh as a frozen browser. There isn’t even another date you can count down to. If you’re wondering how to emotionally prepare for the groundhog-day months ahead — and maybe even find some joy in the coming season — here’s some advice.

    Plan small treats.

    If you’re the kind of person who delights in creating a spreadsheet on Jan. 1 to plot out the coming year, slow your roll. You can still plan small things to look forward to, said Bethany Teachman, a psychology professor at the University of Virginia. Because many of her family’s usual plans for the season have been upended — like everyone else’s — each person gets to choose an activity. For example: At the request of her older daughter, a fan of “The Great British Baking Show,” the family decided to “get a ton of baking ingredients and make something really complicated that will fall apart,” Dr. Teachman said. Plan “anything that is going to give you sparks of joy” as frequently as you can during the coming months, she said.

    Define what matters.

    With months to go until restrictions ease, the pandemic may seem like a never-ending punishment. While staying home and avoiding travel is not even remotely like actual prison time, there is one thing you can learn from inmates who adapt best to long sentences: They define (or redefine) what matters, said Mitch Abrams, a psychologist who oversees mental health services for New Jersey state prisons.

    Dr. Abrams often asks his patients a series of questions, like what and who is important to you? What would you want your legacy to be? And what are you willing to do to make your reality as best you can under these circumstances? And this one: “We are social beings. Circumstances sometimes make it more challenging to build, foster and nurture relationships. How can you nurture your relationship with yourself, so that you can then do the same for your relationships with others?”
    Dr. Abrams said working in prisons for 21 years has taught him two things. The first is that human beings are incredibly resilient and adaptable; the second is that happiness comes from within. “The more you are able to appreciate what you have, the better off you’ll be,” he said. “I don’t necessarily mean material things. It could be your sanity, it could be your health.”

    Stay in the moment.

    Endurance sports psychology tells us that the body is capable of far more than the brain believes. (If someone had told you in March how long the pandemic would last, would you have thought you could handle it?) So focus on the moment, not the big picture.

    Anxiety comes from casting yourself into the future, but “if you keep your energy in the present moment, and you’re not contemplating how many more miles you have, it can feel easy at times,” said Jo Daniels, a senior lecturer in clinical psychology at the University of Bath, in England, and an author on a study about what causes anxiety and depression in lockdown.

    How do you stay in the moment? There are all kinds of mindfulness exercises, but one is to list five things for which you’re grateful, however small — yes, a hot cup of coffee counts. When you’re feeling overwhelmed, think only about what you need to do to get through the next hour or the next day — not the next week or the next month.

    Dr. Daniels’ pandemic study found negative coping strategies — like repeatedly overeating and excess drinking — had more of an impact on people’s levels of anxiety and distress than more positive coping strategies, like seeking support. “The message is, ‘Try to do the good things, but definitely don’t do the bad things,” Dr. Daniels said. No one is suggesting your end-of-day cocktail or afternoon cake needs to go. Problems arise if you use these things repeatedly to change your mood — and you feel guilty about that afterward, she said.
    Editors’ Picks

    Take control.

    If you feel as if you’re a hostage to the pandemic, well, that’s because it does have one thing in common with actually being held captive. It presents a fundamentally uncertain fate, said Emma Kavanagh, a former police and military psychologist in South Wales who has taught about the psychology of hostage negotiation. Those who mentally fare best in hostage situations often work to regain some measure of control over their environment, whether it’s declaring, “I will walk 100 steps around my cell today” or “I will do 50 push-ups.”

    “Having something we can decide upon and activate can help restore that sense of control,” Dr. Kavanagh wrote in an email. Exercise is a good choice because it boosts endorphins, but your something doesn’t have to involve sweating. It can be anything that makes you feel in control of your own daily experience, whether that is a routine or a small daily ritual.

    Find flexibility and tolerance.

    In a case of science confirming common sense, a series of studies published in October in the journal Frontiers in Psychology looked at how uncertainty makes it hard to persevere. In one study, some participants were told they would be giving a speech (meant to be an anxiety-inducing task in itself), others that they would be rating speeches and a third group that there had been a glitch and they’d find out later what they were doing. All the groups then worked on complex anagrams, and the group that didn’t know what task they had to do made the fewest attempts to solve the puzzles. (Those who thought they had to give a speech made the next fewest.)

    One theory explains this by assuming that when things are uncertain “people are saving all their energy for the thing they don’t know is coming,” said Jessica Alquist, an associate professor of psychology at Texas Tech University and the study’s lead researcher. “Uncertainty might just be a cue to our brains to lock everything up.”

    People who experience the least brain freezing, who handle uncertainty best, are those who are flexible, said Dr. Teachman, who has also studied uncertainty. If you find yourself spinning out, ask yourself if you’re jumping to conclusions or assuming the worst. Is there another way you might think about your situation? You can also think about somebody who you admire in terms of the way they handle stress, and ask yourself how they might respond to this situation. Glass-half-empty people, don’t worry: This doesn’t mean you always need to assume things will go well. “There is no one right way to think about situations because our context is constantly changing and the demands are constantly changing,” Dr. Teachman said.

    Uncertainty tolerance is also something you can improve — even in lockdown. (New Year’s resolution, anyone?) Here’s how: Try something new you haven’t tried before, preferably something that scares you a little. Dr. Teachman has tried skydiving and bungee jumping in an effort to push herself, but you don’t have to go that far. It could be something like messaging someone you met who you thought might become a friend but never followed up on, or giving feedback to someone when you’d normally stay quiet. The idea is to do something where you don’t quite know how it’s going to turn out, because this forces you to tolerate uncertainty.

    “You can do it,” Dr. Teachman said. “It’s uncomfortable but it’s not dangerous.” (Well, not unless you choose skydiving.)

    Gist (some quite obvious others maybe less, or nicely reformulated):
    -Plan small treats,
    -redefine what's important,
    -stay in the moment,
    - find little things one can control, like a small daily ritual
    - develop flexibility and tolerance
    - and a bit more details
  • wizzywig
    wizzywig Posts: 1,246 Member
    <3
  • Machka9
    Machka9 Posts: 24,799 Member
    Here's a published article in nytimes on How to manage New-Year expectations

    Most of the text is based on studies of people who were imprisoned or hostages and other contexts pertinent to the current context. (of course it's not as bad a prison for most people but there are some common points indicated).

    I put the whole text here because nytimes is free only for 1st 4 articles (per software program used to be, not sure anymore- 4 on safari, 4 on chrome, etc)
    Ah, New Year’s Eve is fast approaching, and it’s finally time to leave the wreckage of 2020 behind. Except for many people, it seems as if not much will change except the year on the calendar, making the new year feel about as much of a refresh as a frozen browser. There isn’t even another date you can count down to. If you’re wondering how to emotionally prepare for the groundhog-day months ahead — and maybe even find some joy in the coming season — here’s some advice.

    Plan small treats.

    If you’re the kind of person who delights in creating a spreadsheet on Jan. 1 to plot out the coming year, slow your roll. You can still plan small things to look forward to, said Bethany Teachman, a psychology professor at the University of Virginia. Because many of her family’s usual plans for the season have been upended — like everyone else’s — each person gets to choose an activity. For example: At the request of her older daughter, a fan of “The Great British Baking Show,” the family decided to “get a ton of baking ingredients and make something really complicated that will fall apart,” Dr. Teachman said. Plan “anything that is going to give you sparks of joy” as frequently as you can during the coming months, she said.

    Define what matters.

    With months to go until restrictions ease, the pandemic may seem like a never-ending punishment. While staying home and avoiding travel is not even remotely like actual prison time, there is one thing you can learn from inmates who adapt best to long sentences: They define (or redefine) what matters, said Mitch Abrams, a psychologist who oversees mental health services for New Jersey state prisons.

    Dr. Abrams often asks his patients a series of questions, like what and who is important to you? What would you want your legacy to be? And what are you willing to do to make your reality as best you can under these circumstances? And this one: “We are social beings. Circumstances sometimes make it more challenging to build, foster and nurture relationships. How can you nurture your relationship with yourself, so that you can then do the same for your relationships with others?”
    Dr. Abrams said working in prisons for 21 years has taught him two things. The first is that human beings are incredibly resilient and adaptable; the second is that happiness comes from within. “The more you are able to appreciate what you have, the better off you’ll be,” he said. “I don’t necessarily mean material things. It could be your sanity, it could be your health.”

    Stay in the moment.

    Endurance sports psychology tells us that the body is capable of far more than the brain believes. (If someone had told you in March how long the pandemic would last, would you have thought you could handle it?) So focus on the moment, not the big picture.

    Anxiety comes from casting yourself into the future, but “if you keep your energy in the present moment, and you’re not contemplating how many more miles you have, it can feel easy at times,” said Jo Daniels, a senior lecturer in clinical psychology at the University of Bath, in England, and an author on a study about what causes anxiety and depression in lockdown.

    How do you stay in the moment? There are all kinds of mindfulness exercises, but one is to list five things for which you’re grateful, however small — yes, a hot cup of coffee counts. When you’re feeling overwhelmed, think only about what you need to do to get through the next hour or the next day — not the next week or the next month.

    Dr. Daniels’ pandemic study found negative coping strategies — like repeatedly overeating and excess drinking — had more of an impact on people’s levels of anxiety and distress than more positive coping strategies, like seeking support. “The message is, ‘Try to do the good things, but definitely don’t do the bad things,” Dr. Daniels said. No one is suggesting your end-of-day cocktail or afternoon cake needs to go. Problems arise if you use these things repeatedly to change your mood — and you feel guilty about that afterward, she said.
    Editors’ Picks

    Take control.

    If you feel as if you’re a hostage to the pandemic, well, that’s because it does have one thing in common with actually being held captive. It presents a fundamentally uncertain fate, said Emma Kavanagh, a former police and military psychologist in South Wales who has taught about the psychology of hostage negotiation. Those who mentally fare best in hostage situations often work to regain some measure of control over their environment, whether it’s declaring, “I will walk 100 steps around my cell today” or “I will do 50 push-ups.”

    “Having something we can decide upon and activate can help restore that sense of control,” Dr. Kavanagh wrote in an email. Exercise is a good choice because it boosts endorphins, but your something doesn’t have to involve sweating. It can be anything that makes you feel in control of your own daily experience, whether that is a routine or a small daily ritual.

    Find flexibility and tolerance.

    In a case of science confirming common sense, a series of studies published in October in the journal Frontiers in Psychology looked at how uncertainty makes it hard to persevere. In one study, some participants were told they would be giving a speech (meant to be an anxiety-inducing task in itself), others that they would be rating speeches and a third group that there had been a glitch and they’d find out later what they were doing. All the groups then worked on complex anagrams, and the group that didn’t know what task they had to do made the fewest attempts to solve the puzzles. (Those who thought they had to give a speech made the next fewest.)

    One theory explains this by assuming that when things are uncertain “people are saving all their energy for the thing they don’t know is coming,” said Jessica Alquist, an associate professor of psychology at Texas Tech University and the study’s lead researcher. “Uncertainty might just be a cue to our brains to lock everything up.”

    People who experience the least brain freezing, who handle uncertainty best, are those who are flexible, said Dr. Teachman, who has also studied uncertainty. If you find yourself spinning out, ask yourself if you’re jumping to conclusions or assuming the worst. Is there another way you might think about your situation? You can also think about somebody who you admire in terms of the way they handle stress, and ask yourself how they might respond to this situation. Glass-half-empty people, don’t worry: This doesn’t mean you always need to assume things will go well. “There is no one right way to think about situations because our context is constantly changing and the demands are constantly changing,” Dr. Teachman said.

    Uncertainty tolerance is also something you can improve — even in lockdown. (New Year’s resolution, anyone?) Here’s how: Try something new you haven’t tried before, preferably something that scares you a little. Dr. Teachman has tried skydiving and bungee jumping in an effort to push herself, but you don’t have to go that far. It could be something like messaging someone you met who you thought might become a friend but never followed up on, or giving feedback to someone when you’d normally stay quiet. The idea is to do something where you don’t quite know how it’s going to turn out, because this forces you to tolerate uncertainty.

    “You can do it,” Dr. Teachman said. “It’s uncomfortable but it’s not dangerous.” (Well, not unless you choose skydiving.)


    "Endurance sports psychology tells us that the body is capable of far more than the brain believes. (If someone had told you in March how long the pandemic would last, would you have thought you could handle it?) So focus on the moment, not the big picture."

    Absolutely!! I've been in partial "shutdown" for 3 years now. The pandemic actually made things better. :)<3
    I wish we could go into a tighter "shutdown" again this winter like we did for 4 months last winter!!

    But yes, endurance sports psychology can help.

    I've been a long distance cyclist since 1994 when I cycled my first century (100 miles in one day). A century doesn't require too much endurance sports psychology but when I got up to about 400 km in one day, in 2001, it did.

    When you cycle distances like that or longer, you've got to stop thinking of the ride as 400 km (or longer) or you won't finish the ride ... you might even be tempted not to start!

    Instead you approach it one section at a time.

    When you're training, 50-100 km rides are commonplace. So when you set out on the 400 km ride, you plan to ride to the first control (rest stop) which will usually be about 50-75 km away. That's easy! You've done heaps of rides of that distance. You can do it! When you get there, you'll ride to the next control (rest stop) which will usually be about 50-75 km away. Again, that's a distance you're used to. Sure you're not quite as fresh but some days are like that. You can do it! And you keep that up till you finish! :)


    I used that same technique to get through my Master's degree. When I started, it was 16 courses and years away! That felt daunting! So I had to focus and approach it one course at a time, and at times, even one assignment at a time. Just get the next assignment done ... just the next assignment.


    And in my husband's and my current situation ... I continue to do the next thing on my list. One thing at a time. For the past 3 years, I've not been able to plan more than a few weeks in advance. It bothered me at first, but I've settled in. It feels normal now.

    "Uncertainty tolerance is also something you can improve — even in lockdown."

    I guess I have done that if uncertainty feels normal now.


    M in Oz
  • SophieRosieMom
    SophieRosieMom Posts: 3,317 Member
    :)
  • cityjaneLondon
    cityjaneLondon Posts: 12,183 Member
    Bananas and Machka - writing is somewhat similar to an endurance sport. No one can write a big book in a burst of enthusiasm. A routine, discipline, keeping your expectations realistic, don't look at the whole thing at once. Small triumphs. I am a great believer in routine and habit. Cultivating one is hard, but once you've got into it, it's much easier.
    I used to tell my students to just get black on white. DON'T LET THE PERFECT BE THE ENEMY OF THE GOOD. Getting started every day is the hardest bit, so just tell yourself you will write one sentence. (Run to the end of the road. Do five minutes tidying up etc.) Doing something is better than doing nothing. Analysis is paralysis.
    It's the same with learning a language. Five minutes a day is better than no minutes a day. A few sentences is better than no words. (A short walk is better than no walk. )
    How many people let their lives go by ? "I haven't got time ......" The saddest words. There's always time to begin and then you just carry on eating that elephant, a bit at a time.


    My word for 2021 is FRUITFUL, so, what i hope to gain is fruitfulness! I want to finish the second volume of my memoir and publish it. I would like to gain some publicity for it.

    Love Heather UK xxxxxxxx
  • KJLaMore
    KJLaMore Posts: 2,827 Member
    MOrning all! Took a short walk last night. I wanted it to be a longer walk, but due to poor clothing choices (only one extra layer on) and no Yaktrax on my shoes; I ended up turning around sooner from cold and feet slipping around on slightly icy bike path. The thermostat outside my door said 32*F. Once I got out and realized how bitter cold it was, I checked the temp on my phone 25* with 20 mph wind; that brings it down to 11*! All in all, I did get one mile in vs. sitting on my butt and watching Netflix. Thought I froze my buns off, but nope...it was still there when I got home. :(
    Welcome new ladies!

    Braless and Commando - When I was younger, if my clothing choices called for it, yes. Now, I don't go anywhere without underwear on and going without a bra is akin to spending the day in jammies and no make up. (Things I only do when I am under the weather).

    What do I want to GAIN in 2021
    - Full use of my brain would be great! I don't mean the ability to use 100% of my brain; just having my brain act, react, remember, organize thought like it did pre covid. It is amazing, that even though I don't believe the stresses of 2020 really affected me as much as others, my brain tells another story. The inability to function is tangible, frustrating, and exhausting! SO...I WANT MY BRAIN BACK!!

    Today we are making gingerbread men! I know it sounds like a very Christmassy activity, BUT...I got an idea a few weeks ago, while wandering through facebook posts. Our Cheri posted a memory of a gingerbread activity (like a Flat Stanley activity) where you send your gingerbread man out on an adventure (through the mail). *lightbulb* I had already made up my mind to have the focus of 2021 be on geography and regions and I think having a gingerbread man run, run, run as fast as he can to all kinds of places would be a great way to introduce the kids to different places, cultures, and lifestyles!

    I better fly! Kiddos at the door! ttfn xoxoxo KJ (Kelly)
  • Lagopus
    Lagopus Posts: 1,016 Member
    edited January 2021
    Kelly, you're brilliant, brain fuzz notwithstanding! What a great idea for a geography lesson!

    /Penny, heading out into the dark to secure 10,000 steps for an ongoing challenge at the
    t07190.gif

    PS: When you send your gingerbread men to Svalbard, make sure they've got headlamps if it's winter, and sunglasses if it's summer!
  • Machka9
    Machka9 Posts: 24,799 Member
    Machka9 wrote: »
    Getting to know you ...

    I'll ask the question that appears at the top of the Message Board/Forum:


    What are you looking to GAIN in 2021?

    In the post that starts that thread, it says, "The journey with MFP isn’t just about what you lose (or how much you want to lose). It’s about everything you’ll gain. Healthy habits, confidence, motivation, support…and so much more."

    You can, of course, respond to that post by clicking the link at the top of the Message Board/Forum (be sure to read the entire first post before you do), or we can chat amongst ourselves.

    And here, the answer to "What are you looking to GAIN in 2021" does not just need to be about weight loss, fitness, etc. Maybe it's about improved relationships with family or friends, accomplishing an education or career goal, running your first marathon, retirement, consistency with your spiritual life, an uncluttered house, etc.

    Is there one thing you would like to GAIN in 2021?

    M in Oz

    There are many things I would like to gain in 2021, but one I've started chipping away at is getting on top of things around the house. I'd like to be able to walk in the door and not immediately think of a long list of things I need to take care of. Every direction I look from where I'm sitting now I'm thinking ... I should really go through that stack of papers, I wonder if I could put the stuff in that basket elsewhere, it would be great to move the file drawers into the office, oh but wait, that would mean I'd have to tackle the office ...
    I'd like to gain control over what I perceive as the chaos here.


    M in Oz
  • Machka9
    Machka9 Posts: 24,799 Member
    KJLaMore wrote: »
    Today we are making gingerbread men! I know it sounds like a very Christmassy activity, BUT...I got an idea a few weeks ago, while wandering through facebook posts. Our Cheri posted a memory of a gingerbread activity (like a Flat Stanley activity) where you send your gingerbread man out on an adventure (through the mail). *lightbulb* I had already made up my mind to have the focus of 2021 be on geography and regions and I think having a gingerbread man run, run, run as fast as he can to all kinds of places would be a great way to introduce the kids to different places, cultures, and lifestyles!

    I better fly! Kiddos at the door! ttfn xoxoxo KJ (Kelly)
    Lagopus wrote: »
    Kelly, you're brilliant, brain fuzz notwithstanding! What a great idea for a geography lesson!

    /Penny, heading out into the dark to secure 10,000 steps for an ongoing challenge at the
    t07190.gif

    PS: When you send your gingerbread men to Svalbard, make sure they've got headlamps if it's winter, and sunglasses if it's summer!



    Yes, and when you send them to Tassie, don't forget that we've got summer when you've got winter and winter when you've got summer. :)

    M in Oz
  • auntiebk
    auntiebk Posts: 2,481 Member
    "Get to do"s and "chose well"s
    Chose well: called Dr’s office to follow up rx, recycling, Post Office, Freddie’s, veg prep.
    Bonus: Stroll with C, D & T, ½ hr combing Tumble (one leg, @#$*&amp;% cockleburs/mats)
    Get to do: take BP, dogs to powerline, call S, call C, call R, FM Cu, volunteer firefighter letter to Cam’s employer, appreciation letter or certificate to boots donator, bottle return, research effective conflict resolution, index mutual aid files, watch STAS Day 20, submit grant pics and receipts, make experimental almond paste, declutter sideboard, practice new dances (Pure Movies to Wine, Beer, Whiskey, Sleeping with the Devil, I ain’t never gonna love nobody but Cornell Crawford (Alley cat), A Little Less Broken, One Margarita, I’m so used to being broke, All Night, Nothing but You, Blame it on my beating heart, Homesick); finish mulching flowerbed; broadcast cover crop seed in veg garden areas, invest another 10 minutes in prepping living trust, Freddie’s for complete series TDAP <$48, get Shingrix vaccine, find and configure a screen time popup, figure out where to plant naked lady bulbs, and soon as it warms up above 50 and dries out below 60% humidity I’ll tape and spray paint those rusted areas of Aunt Elsie’s stove. Reconcile Joe’s EOB’s Thrivent shows only 2263.48 so far, next BGBS ask Terry about GB’s FD firetruck tax levy – contacts, media, advocate???, Thursday FEMA AFG grant application webinar, Wild Rivers (541 247 3514) for dog wash/nail trim appointments.
    Reward: inventory seeds, plan next year’s garden, wishlist replenishments,
    Happier January:
    19: Get back in contact with an old friend you miss: Call CD or FB Cu
    20: Go to bed in good time to recharge: morning nap, then back to the old sleep 5 hrs, get up 3-4 hrs, snooze 2-3 hrs pattern.

    Lisa and Margaret Grr! Likewise "thankful for that algorithm," four words I never expected to say.
    Lisa “Verblio” thanks. Hmm, something to ponder. BTW I need to channel your grantwriting experience. The grantwriter our fire district hoped would write a grant request for a new 4x4 fire truck is out with a back injury and told us we could do it ourselves… ;}
    KJ :love: your early learning expertise… and your wisdom about what parents will do. ;} “Thought I froze my buns off, but nope..” made me laugh out loud and leave Joe wondering what was so funny. :laugh: Ditto what Penny said about your running gingerbread man geography fun.
    Allie sleeping in your own bed, hooray!
    Heather your singalong Zoom pic looks like such fun! Your comments about doing something is better than doing nothing hit home. Another phrase I’ve found helpful (from Gretchen Rubin via Barbie?) is “don’t underestimate the power of the 30 second task.”
    Penny which one is you?
    Kylia well done!
    Tracey sorry you’re hurting, pain is so exhausting. And it is a physical as well as mental drain. Would you remind me what happened and when physio is scheduled?
    Kate Hoping the vaccine makes your Spain trip possible… sooner than May… ;)
    Welcome @Mrs_Hoffer Teresa in central OH!
    Welcome @zaknjakesmum Jennifer and con VERY grats for breaking your plateau. Well done!
    Michele is Vince’s Coumadin a pill or a self-injection? Just learned Coumadin and Warfarin are the same.
    Katla so aggravatingly disappointing about your replacement lenses. :rage:
    Pip don’t understand how paying the $3K could be better than getting 85% of 6 months of income stream, allowing for a 15% property management fee. Is it because of taxes or??? “Moving sooner. . . “, how exciting!
    Julie great progress with the corrections, glad the second (grr) aspiration wasn’t as painful as the first. Commando? :noway: neither braless, not with “flip” and “flop.” Did used to swim nude at a friend’s house, lovely private yard, superheated pool, but that was long looonnnggg ago.
    Dee N of Columbus What you said about not wanting anything special, just nice normal days. A nice normal day would feel pretty special indeed.

    What I’d like to gain in 2021? While I’d love to get back to dancing at the Grange, lunching with pals, hugging friends, church, even going to the movies, none of those are in my control right now. Mostly I want closer relationship with Joe, more engagement with the dogs. This I can achieve by investing the time and energy. Oh … and I could like my house and body better . . . if I lavished them both with more care… ;)

    Lighter, lovelies!
    f8qt1s098sxm.gifBarbara, the Southern Oregon Coastie AHMOD
    January: leaner/stronger/kinder than December.
    daily: sit with Joe: 19, weigh/wii: 19/11/46! T’ai Chi & Parade, steps>5592=7008 vits=18 log=19 CI<CO=17 CI<250<CO=15 Tumble 5=18 Shadow 5=17 mfp=19 outside=19 up hill=17
    wkly: BB&B,T’ai Chi or SWSY x3 =2 rx=2 dance=4 clean 60 mins=6.5 packwalk=2, wt=1/3:144.2, 1/10: 142. 1/17: 142.4
    mnthly: board mtg=1 , grant=1 , 21 plan= bonus: AF=10 play=14 sew=1 waist=42.5
    2021: choose to be leaner/stronger/kinder NOW
  • Lagopus
    Lagopus Posts: 1,016 Member
    Ooo, wow! Put those two trips back to back and you can teach those kids a lot about the planet -- why it's dark here and hot there in December!
  • bananasandoranges
    bananasandoranges Posts: 2,410 Member
    Machka9 wrote: »
    But yes, endurance sports psychology can help.

    M in Oz

    @Machka9 I don't know much about endurance sports (I think). I used to go for days long hikes for up to 11h hiking per day, and I used to swim an hour a day for some years, then slowly scaled down to 30 min 5x a week and tapered off eventually when I stopped tolerating chlorine (or something) well a few years ago. Also, I did masses of quiet sitting meditation. Those 10 day silent retreats 10h meditation per day. It was very much being there minute after minute. And then after that, walking meditation. Probably too oft repeated now, but not focusing on where you are going but on feeling of the movement, the space around etc. I can definitely get some of that sometimes, as I imagine most or all of us can somehow. I think most people have some "meditative" activities in their lives, whether craft, sport, art, cooking, knitting, cleaning, singing, or whatever, where we are just THERE and that's mostly it.
    Bananas and Machka - writing is somewhat similar to an endurance sport. No one can write a big book in a burst of enthusiasm. A routine, discipline, keeping your expectations realistic, don't look at the whole thing at once. Small triumphs. I am a great believer in routine and habit. Cultivating one is hard, but once you've got into it, it's much easier.
    I used to tell my students to just get black on white. DON'T LET THE PERFECT BE THE ENEMY OF THE GOOD. Getting started every day is the hardest bit, so just tell yourself you will write one sentence. (Run to the end of the road. Do five minutes tidying up etc.) Doing something is better than doing nothing. Analysis is paralysis.
    It's the same with learning a language. Five minutes a day is better than no minutes a day. A few sentences is better than no words. (A short walk is better than no walk. )
    How many people let their lives go by ? "I haven't got time ......" The saddest words. There's always time to begin and then you just carry on eating that elephant, a bit at a time.

    Love Heather UK xxxxxxxx

    @cityjaneLondon Heather, I totally agree with you. One of my 3 groups this week chose the discussion subject, motivation or lack of motivation during this time of lockdown/curfew/social distancing. In a group of about 10 only one feels fully motivated and no issue. All the others are seriously struggling. One said, a bit like you say, that he does a little a day, and even if it's not great, it's already that, it doesn't have to be fantastic. That they (especially young students) are right now struggling to survive, to not get depressed. that even he did a just a little, he can say, "it's already that". some well-known artist said, (like when you have young kids and a full-time job) you can always draw a little. I have one colleague who has so little time but his commitment is to making one LINE per day! my research advisor said (recently) that she always would start and sit down to begin, and if it didn't go well, at least she had tried... that all seems to go in the same direction...

    @KJLamore I tend to always dress VERY warmly in the winter. Wool socks, often wool undershirt, wool sweater and down jacket, wool hat and often hiking sneakers. Then I'm pretty good to go for a bit of a walk or even a short-ish sit. It doesn't go far below 32° here very often. It often hovers around 33-34° at present it's a bit warmer.
  • bananasandoranges
    bananasandoranges Posts: 2,410 Member
    I spent about 2h just calculating and entering grades in this complex thing. It's really annoying cause the school has a faster system to just enter grades, but they don't let some of us use it and so we spend at least double the time. don't get me started! I have not yet started todays planned 16 corrections, or other stuff.

    AFTER 3H LAST WEEK ON HOLD W BANK AND SEEING TRANSFER AUTOMATICALLY MADE, they cancelled it with no notice and no reason. SO I HAVE TO CALL AGAIN FOR 1-2 HOURS. it's &@!( crazy! I am only having a tiny proportion of savings transferred so it's not a liquidity issue (unless the bank Is about to go broke). It feels like they are doing tricks to avoid parting with money. Now I have maybe another 2h on phone with bank and who knows if it will work. NOT HAPPY. I am tired - didn't sleep so much- but I guess going for walk #2 (after short 20 min this morning) would be wise, before curfew in 3 hours.