girls ... do you mind if your men go to strip clubs?

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  • Fat_2_Fit_Mommy
    Fat_2_Fit_Mommy Posts: 569 Member
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    You know I think strip clubs and all this porn everywhere is a part of the reason women have so many self-esteem problems. Not only do we have to worry about the pretty girl down the street, when we leave the house we have to worry about our husband/boyfriend watching porn and thinking about other women, they can get on and reply to sex ads, go to the strip club down the street or even pay for sex. I'm not a prude at all when it comes to being with someone but I feel like because so many men are into it it's become okay in society. Of course the person your with is going to be attracted to other women or men but I feel it takes it way too far if they go out of their way to pay to see someone strip. I've been in a relationship with someone who was pretty much a porn addict and it ruins your relationship and any self esteem you have left. Left him because of it.
    I still have high standards and I don't give a **** what other people think strip clubs are tastless and not classy at all. Porn is bad enough because it's everywhere but when you can actually touch the women and more with paying customers that is too much. I don't think it's cute or acceptable in any relationship. If your single do whatever you want but when your with someone you shouldn't pay to see someone strip. Personally, I think men/women are stupid to pay to see someone strip if you have someone at home. Just be more adventorous in your relationship.
    . ^^ this!
  • doorki
    doorki Posts: 2,611 Member
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    Okay, I know many women here are against their men looking at porn, going to strip clubs etc, and are SURE that their man is TOTALLY happy with them, but don't be shocked if you find out that they have a "secret" porn collection or have been to strip clubs without your knowledge.

    Mine knows I'd leave him in a split f****** second. And I'm married. Actually, his a** would get kicked out the front door. It's my house. I have NEVER cheated on any man I've ever been in a relationship with, and I consider this cheating. Our sex life is outstanding and I would NEVER look at porn without involving him, and neither of us is interested in mixing porn into our sex. We've discussed this at length... we're newlyweds. This is the kind of stuff I ASK about and get out in the open. I do not assume anything.

    He knows better than to lie to me. He will be booted out of my house for lying about something like this, and trust me... he knows and understands this.

    I pride myself on being open-minded in life... but this is one of those areas in which I am content to be a bit close-minded.
    Lol, so maybe you scared him into submission! You and I agree on a lot, but I guess this is one we don't.

    A.C.E. Certified Personal and Group Fitness Trainer
    IDEA Fitness member
    Kickboxing Certified Instructor
    Been in fitness for 28+ years and have studied kinesiology and nutrition

    Submission? He freaked when he saw I looked at porn BEFORE we tied the knot. HE freaked. He'd be a fool and hypocrite to lie to me. And he'd better run FAST because I'd come after him throwing all kinds of stuff, including punches... this is one area we will disagree on.

    So....would he freak about you looking at the "V" thread? hmmm =P
  • Gilbrod
    Gilbrod Posts: 1,216 Member
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    As the OP said, she doesn't care if they go, but they aren't releasing their nut on her. Palmela (get it) will have that pleasure for her man that night. Some of you said "I don't care as long as he comes back to me." Maybe I'm old fashioned, but I would feel insulted, if my wife had to go out somewhere else to get horny for me. I like the fact that I, or my wife, don't need outside stimulation to get our jollies on. And all I hear are boyfriends boyfriends and more boyfriends. The wives seem to mind. I'm sure stories will change once conditions of the single ladies change. As for secret oathes, not all men are alike. I cherish my wife's trust and promise to honor her too much for me to keep secrets away from her. All I'm saying is, are you really ok with someone going out to see someone almost or completely naked, get turned on, and release on you?
  • JoyceJoanne
    JoyceJoanne Posts: 760 Member
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    As the OP said, she doesn't care if they go, but they aren't releasing their nut on her. Palmela (get it) will have that pleasure for her man that night. Some of you said "I don't care as long as he comes back to me." Maybe I'm old fashioned, but I would feel insulted, if my wife had to go out somewhere else to get horny for me. I like the fact that I, or my wife, don't need outside stimulation to get our jollies on. And all I hear are boyfriends boyfriends and more boyfriends. The wives seem to mind. I'm sure stories will change once conditions of the single ladies change. As for secret oathes, not all men are alike. I cherish my wife's trust and promise to honor her too much for me to keep secrets away from her. All I'm saying is, are you really ok with someone going out to see someone almost or completely naked, get turned on, and release on you?

    WOW! Judge much?!

    I am married. Have been for 24 years. It doesn't bother me, or him. It's not about "HAVING" to do this to get horny. It's keeping the spark alive by being adventerous. Whatever that may be. As for secret oathes, good for you for not keeping secrets from your wife. My husband doesn't either. You happen to be the minority.
  • avalonmaiara
    avalonmaiara Posts: 60
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    boy will be boys i guess. however girls will be girls and i would get jealous :p we could go together? haha
  • i_am_losing_it
    i_am_losing_it Posts: 310 Member
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    yep, I would mind. Mind so much it would be a deal breaker.
  • stephslosinglbs
    stephslosinglbs Posts: 76 Member
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    Nope not at all, although he only goes for bachelor parties. I know he's coming home to me, no need to be jealous.
  • Huffdogg
    Huffdogg Posts: 1,934 Member
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    I love this thread. I have found so many small-minded and unentertaining people to ignore.
  • BrettPGH
    BrettPGH Posts: 4,720 Member
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    Submission? He freaked when he saw I looked at porn BEFORE we tied the knot. HE freaked. He'd be a fool and hypocrite to lie to me. And he'd better run FAST because I'd come after him throwing all kinds of stuff, including punches... this is one area we will disagree on.

    So....would he freak about you looking at the "V" thread? hmmm =P

    Absolute winningest comment right here! The same women freaking about men looking at women in strip clubs are looking at half naked men on this site and howling like starving wolves.

    I learned a little something a long time ago, you never really know your woman until you've seen her at a male strip club.
  • ninerbuff
    ninerbuff Posts: 48,682 Member
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    I guess many females here aren't familiar with the "Dancing Bear" female strip clubs. Don't look it up if you're a saint.

    A.C.E. Certified Personal and Group Fitness Trainer
    IDEA Fitness member
    Kickboxing Certified Instructor
    Been in fitness for 28+ years and have studied kinesiology and nutrition
  • Hannah_Banana
    Hannah_Banana Posts: 1,242 Member
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    I'm detecting a lot of "Hey! I'm the cool bi-chick!" in this thread...

    It's great to be confident in your relationship - I certainly am, my man would move the world for me. While I can't say one way or the other how I would feel about it considering neither of us have ever given it a second thought, I would have to wonder WHY. My man is quite satisfied at home, we enjoy each other immensely. If I dated a guy who would rather be at a strip club than home in the bedroom with me, I would find that peculiar.
  • JustJennie1
    JustJennie1 Posts: 3,843 Member
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    It's not about your man not being satisfied at home or whatever some of the posters here think. Also, where has anyone said that their husband goes there all the time? The last time I was at a strip club with my husband was in February for a party. The time before that was probably early in the summer or last year when we were in Colorado. It's not something we do "all the time". When he was in sales he'd take his clients to a topless joint. He goes to a strip club with his buddies very infrequently and when he does go I really couldn't care less.

    He has everything he could possibly want right here at home. A strip club just adds a little spice and entertainment. I'm not jealous. He's not taking the girls home and he's not having sex with them. He doesn't particularly like lap dances because they really don't do anything for him however he likes ME to get lap dances and we have had the couples dance once or twice.

    I think some of you people need to open your mind up a little bit. Oh, and for those of you who say he doesn't go or you put your foot down and there's no way in hell you'd let him go guess what? He's going. He's just hiding it from you.

    Oh, and when you go to the strip club with your man and you're both all horned up it makes for an incredibly fun ride home. Just sayin'.
  • JustJennie1
    JustJennie1 Posts: 3,843 Member
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    I'm detecting a lot of "Hey! I'm the cool bi-chick!" in this thread...

    Why does a woman have to be bi in order to appreciate a beautiful naked woman?
  • ninerbuff
    ninerbuff Posts: 48,682 Member
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    I'm detecting a lot of "Hey! I'm the cool bi-chick!" in this thread...

    It's great to be confident in your relationship - I certainly am, my man would move the world for me. While I can't say one way or the other how I would feel about it considering neither of us have ever given it a second thought, I would have to wonder WHY. My man is quite satisfied at home, we enjoy each other immensely. If I dated a guy who would rather be at a strip club than home in the bedroom with me, I would find that peculiar.
    Don't try to figure men out. We love watching big sweaty guys run or pass up and down the field with an oblong ball and get seriously excited about it (no homo). Many females don't get that either. Like I stated earlier, if men were truly dissatisfied with their girls, they would probably move on. Going to a strip club or watching porn isn't an indication that we're being unfaithful or are unsatisfied. We're just "visually" entertained. Testosterone has an effect on us sexually which is why the average male thinks of sex every time they think about food (which is about 19 times a day). That's usually double of what females think of it.

    A.C.E. Certified Personal and Group Fitness Trainer
    IDEA Fitness member
    Kickboxing Certified Instructor
    Been in fitness for 28+ years and have studied kinesiology and nutrition
  • 10KEyes
    10KEyes Posts: 250 Member
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    i personally don't mind at all. One rule though - he doesn't get to come home and get ~me~. "Bubbles" doesn't get to be in his mind while he's with me (not that my awesome body wouldn't override that fact...)

    but really - srip clubs, lap dances bother me not in the least. Unless, of course, he was blowing his paycheck everweek, then there would be a problem.

    You? How do you feel about it?

    LMAO! My wife wouldn't care either, but I wouldn't go for a couple of reasons. One, I can see all that at home AND I can touch. Also, I would hate to spend the money, what a complete waste. Just saying.
  • Meg177
    Meg177 Posts: 215 Member
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    I would say yes it bothers me. Because I know how easily addicted people can get to strip clubs, porn, etc. And it can ruin people. I would rather be single for the rest of my life, then have my boyfriend/husband go to a strip club or watch porn. Those images that the men will get in thier head after going to the strip club, it is hard to get those images out of thier heads. Porn too. I was a prostitute at one time in my life, trying to pay the bills after my divorce. And alot of my clients were married men. Thier wives had no idea. The other thing is, do you think the strippers like what they are doing? No, but they do it for the money, the drugs, etc. They don't really know any better. I have some stripper friends, they are not strippers anymore thank God. But all of them were sexually abused as children, as teenagers got into drugs and then became strippers. Drugs are very easy to get when your a stripper. Do you really want your men spending thier hard earned money on these strippers? Dont forget thier are vip sections where they can get extra's. And some men once they have been drinking awhile. They will forget about thier wife, and they will think, hey a handjob or blow job isnt cheating, because we aren't having intercourse. Have any of you researched the sex trafficking industry? They make millions on stealing girls and women and pimping them out. Alot of these women don't want to be prostitutes but are forced into it. Keep letting your husbands induldge in strip clubs, etc. I won't be surprised when he ends up cheating on you, or giving you an std. Strip clubs are not harmless fun. They are disgusting. Open your eyes. I dare you women to go to the strip clubs by yourself. Talk to the strippers, hear thier stories, and see all the married men with rings on thier fingers, sitting thier acting like horny teenage boys. There is an epidemic, and more and more people are becoming sex addicts, because of the easy affordable sex there is out there. Porn, prostitutes, strippers, Adult personals. Yall might be normal people that don't know about this stuff. But I have lived it, and seen the devestation it causes.

    Your broad generalizations are ignorant. I have had strippers for friends, I have known drug addicts, I'm totally aware of the sex trafficking industry, and yet I still somehow live with myself every day while enjoying strip clubs. Everybody's gotta get paid somehow, and if strippin' keeps the lights on, I think that's great.

    Her information isnt ignorant. Not all woman in that situation are there against their will or being abused or on drugs, but there are ALOT that are. You just never know which one is and isnt. How can you enjoy the "show" knowing that the sex indistry is made up of mostly women that are not there by choice. BUT I guess if you would be ok with your wife or daughter up there with men lusting over them (some innocent and some not so much) then enjoy. But its not a healthy lifestyle for anyone involved.
    ^^This. It's just not good for anybody. It's exactly the same as eating junk food and, as long as you stay under calories, it's OK. It's not. You need the nutrition of good, clean food. Same with sex - and this IS sex.
  • luv_lea
    luv_lea Posts: 1,094 Member
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    Doesn't bother me if they go. Most guys I've been serious with don't really have an interest to go alone and would rather go with me (as I REALLY like to go to stripclubs.)
  • SnakeDarling
    SnakeDarling Posts: 352 Member
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    Personally, yes it would bother me if it was frequent.
    Now if it's a special occasion, I don't mind one bit.

    But, to me, it would make me feel insecure with myself.
    Like... I can't turn you on like them?

    Just me.
  • BrettPGH
    BrettPGH Posts: 4,720 Member
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    It's just not good for anybody. It's exactly the same as eating junk food and, as long as you stay under calories, it's OK. It's not. You need the nutrition of good, clean food. Same with sex - and this IS sex.

    I love how authoritative people can be. Apparently you have not only your own life figured out but everyone else's as well. You are the arbiter of what is good and what isn't. Silly that the rest of us have thought we could make up our minds for ourselves.

    And saying that going to strip clubs = sex is just flat out ridiculous. I can't think of anyone who'd agree with such a statement.
  • JustJennie1
    JustJennie1 Posts: 3,843 Member
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    And saying that going to strip clubs = sex is just flat out ridiculous. I can't think of anyone who'd agree with such a statement.

    Some one with a closed mind who judges others.

    Seriously. I kind of have to laugh at where this thread has gone.

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