Survey time: Should a guy pay on a first date?

First off it's rude to take your money and not offer any back.IMO It would be nice if the guy paid to show he cares, but if not the bill should be split !!

I always offer to pay. Although I also generally offer to pay if I'm just getting drinks with friends too, that's just the way I am. But I'll get a little bitter if we hang out a few times and they never once offer to help pay or at least pick up the tip.

If I'm looking to be in a relationship with someone I want to feel like we are a team. If someone feels entitled to get free food just because they are a female then I'll assume they expect special treatment all the time.

Some women EXPECT men to have manners and to treat them a certain way, yet they have no manners themselves. Kind of disrespectful.

I always offered to pay my share, but I wasn't going to twist the dude's arm if he insisted on paying, unless the date was HORRIBLE and I knew I never wanted to see him again.

I usually would leave the tip at least, or buy a round of drinks, or rent a movie... something. I didn't like feeling like I owe anyone anything.

No...he pays. You are paying with your time.

Because your time is that much more important than his?

Did not read all the responses.

This is what my mother would say:

No...he pays. You are paying with your time.

He is also paying with his time...

Sounds like a loser and it sounds like you already know that.

My boyfriend paid for our first date and then the next 20 or so, too. Now he also pays the mortgage and the bills. I buy all the groceries, added him to my gym membership and will try to slip in and pay occasionally when he's not looking - either for coffee or for a fancy $200 dinner. It's my way of saying thank you.

But it didn't start that way and my boyfriend and I agree on the standard. He's a gentleman. I've lived with him for over a year and he still opens my car door for me 99% of the time. He's proud to provide for me. I'm proud to cook him dinner almost every night.

But everyone is different. And it works for us because we have the same views on our roles. And we're not stupid either - if we can't afford a nice dinner, we'll do something at home or on the cheap. Not trying to make him go broke to wine and dine me - that's pompous. Anyway, guess it's a balance and this guy is not the one for you. Next time, keep your $50 and offer to tip if that's what you believe in.

ETA: I'd pay for the whole thing before I paid for myself via split checks. Unless I was put off by the guy.

No...he pays. You are paying with your time.

Because your time is that much more important than his?

Yup. most women spend more time turning down dates than actually going on them. Men seem to ask everyone out for some reason. I dont go on a date with every single guy so the ones I do go out with I do expect them to value the time i'm giving them.

I say each should pay for their own meal, you don't even know if you have a connection yet, so I don't think it's fair to expect him to pay.

No...he pays. You are paying with your time.

Because your time is that much more important than his?

Yup. most women spend more time turning down dates than actually going on them. Men seem to ask everyone out for some reason. I dont go on a date with every single guy so the ones I do go out with I do expect them to value the time i'm giving them.

So in order for us to "value" our time together we have to put a price tag on it?

Depends on who asked who out. I'm certainly not going to ask a guy to a $75 per meal restaurant and then make him pay. However, if he invites me to said expensive restaurant, the same goes. The person who set up the plans pays. I even do that with my friends if I invite them to get mexican. I pay, because I invited them.