Students forced to give passwords...

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Replies

  • runnercheryl
    runnercheryl Posts: 1,314 Member
    Those who would give up freedom for safety deserve neither. It negates the point of me and all my brothers and sisters in arms serving to defend those rights most of civilians take for granted. If your child is being bullied and don't tell you, maybe you need to be asking yourself why your child feels they can't talk to you and not teach them that privacy and freedom must be sacrificed so someone can feel "safe". I was bullied growing up. I learned to defend myself and when I needed help I asked for it.

    Absolutely.
  • macpatti
    macpatti Posts: 4,280 Member
    Those who would give up freedom for safety deserve neither. It negates the point of me and all my brothers and sisters in arms serving to defend those rights most of civilians take for granted. If your child is being bullied and don't tell you, maybe you need to be asking yourself why your child feels they can't talk to you and not teach them that privacy and freedom must be sacrificed so someone can feel "safe". I was bullied growing up. I learned to defend myself and when I needed help I asked for it.
    Absolutely.
    These are children, people. What if your 13 year old daughter is dating a 19 year old college guy. You are made aware of it and ask her about it and she lies. Will you then "invade her privacy" by looking through her things for evidence, maybe follow her one day, maybe pull her phone record and cross check numbers? At what point are you suggesting children not give up freedom and just how much "privacy" do you give them?
  • SandiBren
    SandiBren Posts: 33 Member
    The school is responsible for education. Nothing else.
  • NathanJ79
    NathanJ79 Posts: 36
    Just say no. At least, that's the first step.

    When I was in school, we didn't have cell phones or Facebook. But we were warned of adults trying to invade children's privacy. It was of a more sexual nature, of course. And we were taught to say no. In other words, object.

    Reading your child's Facebook is not the same as a sexual assault, but it is an invasion of privacy and the motives are similar... although, perhaps more similar to the webcam scandal, when the school was loaning kids laptops with webcams and watching them change and stuff. Whether it's sexual molestation, voyeurism, or reading private journal entries, the motive is the same. They want to be in your child's private life. And the advice is the same. Just say no. If that doesn't work, say it louder.

    With each of these things, there is a simple solution. Sexual assault? Kick the perp in the junk. Webcam spying? Put duct tape over the camera. Facebook? The parents have the password and log the kid in. The kid doesn't have the password. They have to direct the school to the parents, who do have the password.
  • veganbaum
    veganbaum Posts: 1,865 Member
    I agree students should never be required to give passwords. Doesn't mean I don't think schools shouldn't be allowed to snoop if they have good reason to, but that still shouldn't require a student to give up a password.

    I find macpatti's school's policy interesting - they can ask to see FB and a student can refuse, but clearly many cooperate. I understand that one might not want a school "raising" their child per se, because the U.S. is so diverse that it is impossible to teach a common culture (not talking about basic manners and things like that, which apparently no one teaches a lot of kids these days). However, I find this division - "my child, I raise them!" - starting to push a little too far. Obviously each person wants their child raised with their values, I'm not disputing a person's right to do so, but a lot of responses seem indicative of a bad attitude towards schools. Such an attitude by parents will be seen by their children, and then the children won't respect the school/teachers/etc., and then what is left for schools to do? Many parents aren't parenting and schools aren't allowed to parent, so who the heck is monitoring what kids are doing? Who's teaching them basic ethics and morals? Schools can't be blamed for everything, a lot of what has tied their hands are the squeaky wheels getting greased. Schools and parents need to come together and find some common ground. Neither is totally at fault, and neither is totally blameless.
  • TheWinman
    TheWinman Posts: 684 Member
    Why does a 13 year old need a Facebook page? My son is 12 and asked for one and I said NO.


    And I can bet you that there is a 50% chance he has one now!
  • sl1ngsh0t
    sl1ngsh0t Posts: 326 Member
    My opinion? Kids under 18 don't need a facebook. They're too young. And yeah, my 13 year old 7th grader doesn't have one, either.
  • lukeout007
    lukeout007 Posts: 1,237 Member
    My opinion? Kids under 18 don't need a facebook. They're too young. And yeah, my 13 year old 7th grader doesn't have one, either.

    That you know of....
  • SandiBren
    SandiBren Posts: 33 Member
    I pre-enrolled my son for Kindergarten yesterday, and I found lot of the questions to be intrusive. For example what dentist do we use, are we migrant workers, can the school nurse call my son's doctor directly...

    This helps him with his ABC's how?

    My daughter's school nurse demanded records from his doctor's appointment because SHE had diagnosed him and was sure she was right. She was wrong. And my daughter told her it was not her right to have that information and refused to give it to her. Yes, she could have been concerned about his health, but there was no need for concern.
  • macpatti
    macpatti Posts: 4,280 Member
    Reading your child's Facebook is not the same as a sexual assault, but it is an invasion of privacy and the motives are similar
    I will disagree on this point only. I don't think that reading a child's FB and sexual assault have similar motives at all.

    Regarding the rest of what you typed, that's just sick individuals with other issues. It's sad that there are these people out there who have access to our children.
  • budhandy
    budhandy Posts: 305 Member
    IMO thats different, its one thing for a parent to snoop its all whole other beast for some alien body to do it.
    Agreed. It's just sad to me that school administrators are considered "alien bodies".
    sorry maybe that was the wrong phrase to use, just trying to smart :laugh: oh I do you like your policy at your school.
  • macpatti
    macpatti Posts: 4,280 Member
    I agree students should never be required to give passwords. Doesn't mean I don't think schools shouldn't be allowed to snoop if they have good reason to, but that still shouldn't require a student to give up a password.

    I find macpatti's school's policy interesting - they can ask to see FB and a student can refuse, but clearly many cooperate. I understand that one might not want a school "raising" their child per se, because the U.S. is so diverse that it is impossible to teach a common culture (not talking about basic manners and things like that, which apparently no one teaches a lot of kids these days). However, I find this division - "my child, I raise them!" - starting to push a little too far. Obviously each person wants their child raised with their values, I'm not disputing a person's right to do so, but a lot of responses seem indicative of a bad attitude towards schools. Such an attitude by parents will be seen by their children, and then the children won't respect the school/teachers/etc., and then what is left for schools to do? Many parents aren't parenting and schools aren't allowed to parent, so who the heck is monitoring what kids are doing? Who's teaching them basic ethics and morals? Schools can't be blamed for everything, a lot of what has tied their hands are the squeaky wheels getting greased. Schools and parents need to come together and find some common ground. Neither is totally at fault, and neither is totally blameless.
    I understand my school is not the norm (I'm at a Catholic, college preparatory school). So, our parents trust us completely and understand and want us helping to raise their children. We take that trust seriously.
  • TheWinman
    TheWinman Posts: 684 Member
    My opinion? Kids under 18 don't need a facebook. They're too young. And yeah, my 13 year old 7th grader doesn't have one, either.

    That you know of....

    You may think they don't have one, good chance they do!
  • macpatti
    macpatti Posts: 4,280 Member
    sorry maybe that was the wrong phrase to use, just trying to smart :laugh: oh I do you like your policy at your school.
    :smile:
  • dlpnrn2b
    dlpnrn2b Posts: 441 Member
    I think that schools are taking things WAY to far these days. I had a bit with my kid's principle for telling my kids what order to eat their food in, and I am talking the food I pack in their lunch boxes, which is none of her damn business to begin with!! Then a first grader (6 years old) was expelled and charged with sexual harassment for singing "I'm sexy and I Know it" at school.. WTF ? all of this is WRONG and it is up to the parents to advocate for our children. If we do not do it, no one will!!
  • Asiral
    Asiral Posts: 133
    We were having a similar situation in Oregon. Job employers were requesting facebook passwords to look at potential employee's private facebook pages. There was a big blowout where Facebook threatened to take legal action because giving out passwords were against their terms of agreement. Its ridiculous.
  • smkafka
    smkafka Posts: 134 Member
    Wow...this is sooo wrong!
  • macpatti
    macpatti Posts: 4,280 Member
    You may think they don't have one, good chance they do!
    Well, my daughter is 10 and begs for one. We won't let her until middle school. I don't think there's "a good chance she has one" that I don't know about. She has no access to a computer at home, she has a non-smart cell phone that she only uses when I let her, and she doesn't have access to FB at school. Not sure how else she'd have one. My 12 year old son has one that only I know the password to (he doesn't even know it). He uses it in front of me only. I'm quite sure he doesn't have a secret one elsewhere because he's got no access.
  • runnercheryl
    runnercheryl Posts: 1,314 Member
    Not only do I not think teachers have the right, I also don't know why they think they have the need. Facebook hasn't always existed, and bullying certainly hasn't always been confined to schools.

    Did teachers follow students home and to the park, in the past, watching over them in case bullying happened somewhere that wasn't their 'territory'? I hope not!
  • SandiBren
    SandiBren Posts: 33 Member
    Schools are responsible for educating our children. Not raising them.
    Could this be part of bigger problem in society, though? It's sad to me that parents, schools, and churches can't join forces in raising children. What about the children who have no real supervision or guidance at home? For many children, no one is raising them.
    You can quote "it takes a village" all you like but it is the PARENT'S responsibility to raise the children in the manner they choose. NO ONE ELSE has that right. I am so thankful most of my grandchildren are home schooled!!
  • TheWinman
    TheWinman Posts: 684 Member
    You may think they don't have one, good chance they do!
    Well, my daughter is 10 and begs for one. We won't let her until middle school. I don't think there's "a good chance she has one" that I don't know about. She has no access to a computer at home, she has a non-smart cell phone that she only uses when I let her, and she doesn't have access to FB at school. Not sure how else she'd have one. My 12 year old son has one that only I know the password to (he doesn't even know it). He uses it in front of me only. I'm quite sure he doesn't have a secret one elsewhere because he's got no access.

    I was talking about a 13 year old in this case, most 13 year olds have them and many parents don't know they do. :)
    I've been in IT security most of my life and I do seminars for parents in our HS district "ONline safety and our children" You would be surprised.
  • macpatti
    macpatti Posts: 4,280 Member
    Then a first grader (6 years old) was expelled and charged with sexual harassment for singing "I'm sexy and I Know it" at school.. WTF ? all of this is WRONG and it is up to the parents to advocate for our children. If we do not do it, no one will!!
    Are you talking about the story in the news lately, or someone you know personally at your school? The one I saw on the news had WAY more to the story than what initially came out. That little boy had been reprimanded for singing songs with sexual lyrics before. He's been in trouble for touching girls inapprpriately before. It was NOT for just singing that song.
  • macpatti
    macpatti Posts: 4,280 Member
    a village" all you like but it is the PARENT'S responsibility to raise the children in the manner they choose. NO ONE ELSE has that right. I am so thankful most of my grandchildren are home schooled!!
    What if the parents aren't taking that responsibility? What if the parents are strung out on drugs and never home? What if the kids are left to take care of themselves all night because the parents are out? It's great that most of your grandchildren have wonderful parents who can homeschool them. Not all children are that blessed.
  • macpatti
    macpatti Posts: 4,280 Member
    I was talking about a 13 year old in this case, most 13 year olds have them and many parents don't know they do. :)
    I would guess these are parents who don't monitor computer or smart phone use very well! Or these are kids who are always at a friend's house and using a friend's computer with no supervision or monitoring.
  • TheWinman
    TheWinman Posts: 684 Member
    I was talking about a 13 year old in this case, most 13 year olds have them and many parents don't know they do. :)
    I would guess these are parents who don't monitor computer or smart phone use very well! Or these are kids who are always at a friend's house and using a friend's computer with no supervision or monitoring.

    Very true! It's amazing how parents at their friend's house reaaly don't watch what's going on.

    Also regarding cellphones. I know at high schools kids can go the phone guy and get a prepaid cellphone no problem. The phone guy use to be the concert ticket guy. lol
  • macpatti
    macpatti Posts: 4,280 Member
    It's amazing how parents at their friend's house reaaly don't watch what's going on.
    I know! I'm even more "on top of it" when our kids have friends over. I would hate to be "that house" where they watched porn or made FB pages, or smoked cigarrettes....haha (I have 5 children, ages 25-10)!
  • dlpnrn2b
    dlpnrn2b Posts: 441 Member
    Then a first grader (6 years old) was expelled and charged with sexual harassment for singing "I'm sexy and I Know it" at school.. WTF ? all of this is WRONG and it is up to the parents to advocate for our children. If we do not do it, no one will!!
    Are you talking about the story in the news lately, or someone you know personally at your school? The one I saw on the news had WAY more to the story than what initially came out. That little boy had been reprimanded for singing songs with sexual lyrics before. He's been in trouble for touching girls inapprpriately before. It was NOT for just singing that song.

    no, I am talking about my school . I am not aware of a story on the news.
  • vwrynn
    vwrynn Posts: 6
    The name of the school makes it sound like a public school, which is funded by the government. Time to introduce your kids to the US Constitution and the 1st, 4th and 5th amendments. Private organizations are not so bound.
    * Amendment 1 - people have the freedom of speech and press - they can express their opinions.
    * Amendment 4 - people may be secure in their houses, papers and persons.
    * Amendment 5 - people have the right to not incriminate themselves.
    They are not required to divulge the password (protected by 5th amendment as of this writing - subject to change later this year). I would ask the principal for a copy of his warrant.

    In searching the Internet, I see this is becoming a common occurence. I think the best policy is for your kids to say nothing except to request the presence of their parents. Be polite, but say nothing except to request the presence of their parents.

    I'm sorry this happened to you.

    ~V
  • SandiBren
    SandiBren Posts: 33 Member
    I guess I'm the odd one out but as far as I'm concerned I'd have no issue with the schools having passwords to my child's fb....it would cut down on all the social bullying plus I want my kids protected and if they want to help keep an extra eye then fine by me. If your child is as " behaved" as you think, why would there be an issue.

    We, unfortunately, have found that some of the worst bullies at the school are teachers. Not all, by any means, but there are teachers out there on major power trips. And we all knew who they were.
  • rml_16
    rml_16 Posts: 16,414 Member
    a village" all you like but it is the PARENT'S responsibility to raise the children in the manner they choose. NO ONE ELSE has that right. I am so thankful most of my grandchildren are home schooled!!
    What if the parents aren't taking that responsibility? What if the parents are strung out on drugs and never home? What if the kids are left to take care of themselves all night because the parents are out? It's great that most of your grandchildren have wonderful parents who can homeschool them. Not all children are that blessed.
    Considering that the mother is involved in this case, clearly the kid has a parent who cares. If the school thinks the parents are neglecting or abusing their children or out all night doing drugs, the school should be calling child protective services, not demanding the kid give up a password the school has no right to.

    Sometimes I wonder if you possess a lick of common sense. Seriously.