Is it rude...

Traditions are over-rated...

IMO - asking people to watch you open gifts is rude. Lol. I'm just do not into wedding crap. Just tell them you'd like to spend that day with your family.

^^^ what she says.

I just figured out what "IMO" means, and I'm pretty excited about that. That is all.

Well could you please tell me, then? I just realized I quoted someone and I don't know what it means...derp.

IMO = in my opinion

I'm going to be a bad person and I'm sure to raise a lot of eyebrows but....What's the divorce rate in America now? Over 50% I believe? And yet in this broke *kitten* economy weddings have become such an overblown self indulgent narcissistic affair in our country. From destination weddings to an example like this...a gift opening party. Why the hell would anyone want to sit around and watch you open your gifts?! I would not feel obligated at all to go, even if I was in the wedding party. The wedding festivities ended with the reception. The day after belongs to you. It's a long distance you've traveled and I'm sure put out a pretty penny for! Visit your family and Grandparents, life is short, they won't be around for ever. And I'm sure if your friend who is getting married is a really good friend she will understand this and if she doesn't..........

Eyebrow not raised. I feel this same exact way about weddings a lot. When they get really demanding, are asking for really expensive stuff, or are getting really elaborate I can't help but think exactly what you said.

You said you are in the wedding. As in bridesmaid? I think if you weren't in the wedding, you could skip it. But if you are in the wedding party- I think you should go as much as that sucks.

Agree 1 million percent.


You are in the wedding....hate it or not, you are going to have to suck it up and go this time.

Weddings are unique circumstances, in which what YOU want does not matter in the least.

Agreed. You agreed to it, didn't you?

You said you are in the wedding. As in bridesmaid? I think if you weren't in the wedding, you could skip it. But if you are in the wedding party- I think you should go as much as that sucks.

Agree 1 million percent.


You are in the wedding....hate it or not, you are going to have to suck it up and go this time.

Weddings are unique circumstances, in which what YOU want does not matter in the least.

Agreed. You agreed to it, didn't you?

Weddings are unique circumstances where two people express their love and affection for each other in a celebration that is supposed to be actual FUN for invited guest -- not an opportunity to force friends and family to play fantasy tea party for 3 consecutive days. She agreed to be a bride's maid, not a slave. All celebrations and parties end with the wedding day. This is something that was sprung on the OP well AFTER she agreed to be a bride's maid.

You said you are in the wedding. As in bridesmaid? I think if you weren't in the wedding, you could skip it. But if you are in the wedding party- I think you should go as much as that sucks.

Agree 1 million percent.


You are in the wedding....hate it or not, you are going to have to suck it up and go this time.

Weddings are unique circumstances, in which what YOU want does not matter in the least.

Agreed. You agreed to it, didn't you?

Totally disagree with this Bridzilla mentality!!

Its funny. I am getting married in September. My sister /MOH (maid of honor) recently got a new job and unfortunately my schedule and hers does not allow for one of us to attend my bachelorette. I have told others i would rather not have a bachelorette without my sister and I keep getting the "its your day" thing when I say that. No one listens when I say no b party because they want a b party I detest the its your day thing. It stops being all about you when you invite people to join the celebration.

The present opening party IS a regional thing in some parts of the US ( based on my time spent on wedding etiquette boards) which is likelynwhy some have heard of it and not others. It doesnt make it less valid. It is also something i have seen here, in Eastern Canada. Here, it is always just anither family/close friend get together and not about showing off. While I am choosing not to have one, none of the ones I have been to have been about that, hard to explain i guess. I have also skipped a fair number.

To the OP - my advice would be - an invitation is not a summons. Decline politely. Any normal bride would understand.

ETA - the requirements of a bridesmaid requiring showing up on time on the wedding day, sober, grooming (not professionally) and in the dress requested by the bride. That is it. throwing parties and attendance at such parties are nice, but optional.

No thats definitely not being rude. You have a valid reason for skipping. Just let your friend know.

As much as I loathe the idea of people throwing a gift-opening party, I think since you're a bridesmaid you should attend. It sucks, I know, but that's what I would do. I would think it's stupid, but I would go. That being said, as soon as that last gift is opened I'd bolt! You'll still have Sunday evening with family.