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I grant then ruin someone's wish...

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Replies

  • jaymvita
    jaymvita Posts: 5,787 Member
    Wow.

    I wish we were moving on from that one.
  • SojournerThirteen
    SojournerThirteen Posts: 28,204 Member
    Granted

    But your legs are taken away
  • kloet_22
    kloet_22 Posts: 1,691 Member
    No wish.....

    I wish I had got to sleep in this morning...stupid overtime at work
  • Cindy4FunFit
    Cindy4FunFit Posts: 2,732 Member
    Granted: you slept in and missed stupid work, but your favorite celebrity was waiting there to meet you. Missed opportunity!

    Wish: the day was longer
  • cblue315
    cblue315 Posts: 3,836 Member
    Granted, but like he said, you have way more things to do today.

    I wish I would stop grinding my teeth.
  • Unknown
    Unknown
    This content has been removed.
  • jaymvita
    jaymvita Posts: 5,787 Member
    w33bl3 wrote: »
    granted.. they all fell out

    i wish my heart had never been broken

    Granted, instead the constant clinginess and incessant fawning with the calls and texts every other second and the goo goo eyes that never stop and the jealous rage that ensues when you're not home on time and the screaming matches because you had someone else's ball point pen in your purse ... Turns you into a murderer and they nickname you the Black Widow in the press. Happy now?

    I wish I were more concise.
  • Cindy4FunFit
    Cindy4FunFit Posts: 2,732 Member
    Lol!

    Granted: you are more concise, but then I don't laugh as much through the day and I get super grumpy and as a result I decide to hate the world & I begin making a long to-be-smacked list and you are at the top. And I know where you live.

    Wish: that girl wanted good attention instead of bad attention
  • LovingLifeInCalifornia
    LovingLifeInCalifornia Posts: 9,362 Member
    Granted. She only wants good attention but you know this because she keeps asking you how to do that - and her voice is grating on your nerves.

    I wish I had been more productive today.
  • SojournerThirteen
    SojournerThirteen Posts: 28,204 Member
    Hey 1st! Granted, cuz I reallllllyyyy like you :)

    You were, but then a witch cast a spell on you that leaves you and all the people you know and love fall into a 25 year sleep (no cure)
  • jaymvita
    jaymvita Posts: 5,787 Member
    LovingLifeInCalifornia wrote: »
    Granted. She only wants good attention but you know this because she keeps asking you how to do that - and her voice is grating on your nerves.

    I wish I had been more productive today.

    Granted, you just delivered octuplets. VERY productive.

    I wish old man winter wouldn't be such a hardass!
  • LovingLifeInCalifornia
    LovingLifeInCalifornia Posts: 9,362 Member
    Why do you keep making me pregnant. That's twice now...and that's not even ruining a wish; its creating a nightmare!!!! :scream: lol

    Granted. He's not a hard as. Now he's a demon. Prepare yourself for a winter disaster.

    I wish I didn't have a crick in my neck.
  • jaymvita
    jaymvita Posts: 5,787 Member
    LovingLifeInCalifornia wrote: »
    Why do you keep making me pregnant. That's twice now...and that's not even ruining a wish; its creating a nightmare!!!! :scream: lol

    Granted. He's not a hard as. Now he's a demon. Prepare yourself for a winter disaster.

    I wish I didn't have a crick in my neck.

    Guess you need better birth control. Sheesh. ;)

    Granted, you no longer have a crick. You now have a cricket. A noisy one ... That you can feel wriggling king around in your neck because he doesn't stop moving. And the noise he makes echoes out of your mouth every time you open it ... Which annoys lots of people because they think you're mocking them and saying that they're boring. So you get punched in the face. A lot.

    I wish I knew when to stop.
  • jaymvita
    jaymvita Posts: 5,787 Member
    LovingLifeInCalifornia wrote: »
    Why do you keep making me pregnant. That's twice now...and that's not even ruining a wish; its creating a nightmare!!!! :scream: lol

    Granted. He's not a hard as. Now he's a demon. Prepare yourself for a winter disaster.

    I wish I didn't have a crick in my neck.

    Guess you need better birth control. Sheesh. ;)

    Granted, you no longer have a crick. You now have a cricket. A noisy one ... That you can feel wriggling king around in your neck because he doesn't stop moving. And the noise he makes echoes out of your mouth every time you open it ... Which annoys lots of people because they think you're mocking them and saying that they're boring. So you get punched in the face. A lot.

    I wish I knew when to stop.
  • Cindy4FunFit
    Cindy4FunFit Posts: 2,732 Member
    Granted: you stopped short, on a revolutionary idea that would have transformed mankind for the better. Should have followed your instincts & helped out your fellow man. Disappointed. Hang your head.

    Wish: I could hear the waves crash
  • jaymvita
    jaymvita Posts: 5,787 Member
    Cindy4FunFit wrote: »
    Granted: you stopped short, on a revolutionary idea that would have transformed mankind for the better. Should have followed your instincts & helped out your fellow man. Disappointed. Hang your head.

    Wish: I could hear the waves crash

    Granted, but the shell you just put to your ear still had a crab in it. And he's pissed at your callous disregard for his personal space and takes your ear clean off. Sorry I'll repeat all that into your good (only) ear.

    I wish mankind didn't rely on my genius so much.
  • Cindy4FunFit
    Cindy4FunFit Posts: 2,732 Member
    edited February 2015
    Granted: instead mankind relies on your fashion sense. Your mom dresses you funny. Do you even own a shirt?! We are so doomed!

    Wish: we had a reliable hero
  • jaymvita
    jaymvita Posts: 5,787 Member
    Cindy4FunFit wrote: »
    Granted: instead mankind relies on your fashion sense. Your mom dresses you funny. Do you even own a shirt?! We are so doomed!

    Wish: we had a reliable hero
    Cindy4FunFit wrote: »
    Granted: instead mankind relies on your fashion sense. Your mom dresses you funny. Do you even own a shirt?! We are so doomed!

    Wish: we had a reliable hero


    Granted. It's a foot long Italian hero with salt, pepper, oil, vinegar and mayo. But it can't keep secrets so it's not all THAT reliable.

    I wish my wit made sense to more than just my invisible girlfriend from Canada.
  • Cindy4FunFit
    Cindy4FunFit Posts: 2,732 Member
    edited February 2015
    Granted: thousands of people are gathered on your lawn to hear your next clever joke, because nothing else makes sense to them anymore. You'll have to be their legal guardians, your invisible Canadian girlfriend hates to share you & just broke up with you due to your over popularity. By text. Cruel love.

    Wish: you could just get settled already
  • jaymvita
    jaymvita Posts: 5,787 Member
    Cindy4FunFit wrote: »
    Granted: thousands of people are gathered on your lawn to hear your next clever joke, because nothing else makes sense to them anymore. You'll have to be their legal guardians, your invisible Canadian girlfriend hates to share you & just broke up with you due to you really over popularity. By text. Cruel love.

    Wish: you could just get settled already

    Granted, a colony of dust mites has just created a settlement on my back. Their population grows rapidly until I'm just a physical host for their thriving mite-ropolis. People are horrified at my living dust mite host appearance and routinely refuse my requests for coffee and pie.

    I wish I had some coffee and pie. With someone. Anyone.
  • sw33tp3a11
    sw33tp3a11 Posts: 4,646 Member
    Granted. Your wit is known to be the best in the whole prison block

    I wish for someone to make me breakfast
  • LovingLifeInCalifornia
    LovingLifeInCalifornia Posts: 9,362 Member
    edited February 2015
    Eta: I was too slow. This is in response to @jaymvita‌

    Granted. A meetup group consisting of only the most annoying people showed up with the most disgusting batch of coffee and spoiled pie. Yum.

    I wish I wasn't such a procrastinator.
  • jaymvita
    jaymvita Posts: 5,787 Member
    sw33tp3a11 wrote: »
    Granted. Your wit is known to be the best in the whole prison block

    I wish for someone to make me breakfast

    Granted, you're now breakfast for a cannibal tribe in darkest Papua. Bon appetit.

    I wish prison was kinder to me.
  • sw33tp3a11
    sw33tp3a11 Posts: 4,646 Member
    jaymvita wrote: »
    Cindy4FunFit wrote: »
    Granted: thousands of people are gathered on your lawn to hear your next clever joke, because nothing else makes sense to them anymore. You'll have to be their legal guardians, your invisible Canadian girlfriend hates to share you & just broke up with you due to you really over popularity. By text. Cruel love.

    Wish: you could just get settled already

    Granted, a colony of dust mites has just created a settlement on my back. Their population grows rapidly until I'm just a physical host for their thriving mite-ropolis. People are horrified at my living dust mite host appearance and routinely refuse my requests for coffee and pie.

    I wish I had some coffee and pie. With someone. Anyone.

    Granted. You're stuck with me.

    I wish I had a tattoo

  • jaymvita
    jaymvita Posts: 5,787 Member
    edited February 2015
    sw33tp3a11 wrote: »
    jaymvita wrote: »
    Cindy4FunFit wrote: »
    Granted: thousands of people are gathered on your lawn to hear your next clever joke, because nothing else makes sense to them anymore. You'll have to be their legal guardians, your invisible Canadian girlfriend hates to share you & just broke up with you due to you really over popularity. By text. Cruel love.

    Wish: you could just get settled already

    Granted, a colony of dust mites has just created a settlement on my back. Their population grows rapidly until I'm just a physical host for their thriving mite-ropolis. People are horrified at my living dust mite host appearance and routinely refuse my requests for coffee and pie.

    I wish I had some coffee and pie. With someone. Anyone.

    Granted. You're stuck with me.

    I wish I had a tattoo

    Win! Ahem, I mean what?

    Granted, Herve Villechaize is now your life partner because he owes you a blood debt.

    I wish that reference wasn't lost on so many young people.
  • Cindy4FunFit
    Cindy4FunFit Posts: 2,732 Member
    Granted: the young replace knowing who Herve is by losing knowing who Lady GaGa is. HOW will they go on?!

    Wish: a pop singer would keep her clothes on
  • LovingLifeInCalifornia
    LovingLifeInCalifornia Posts: 9,362 Member
    Granted, but they are sheer pieces of clothing...so you can still see everything.

    I wish I'd just get up and do stuff!!!!!
  • jaymvita
    jaymvita Posts: 5,787 Member
    Cindy4FunFit wrote: »
    Granted: the young replace knowing who Herve is by losing knowing who Lady GaGa is. HOW will they go on?!

    Wish: a pop singer would keep her clothes on

    That might destroy too many young people. You're heartless.

    Granted, pop singers keep their clothes on but all male opera singers particularly overweight male tenors over the age of 50 are now raging nudists. Thanks.

    I wish I didn't just throw up in my mouth.
  • Cindy4FunFit
    Cindy4FunFit Posts: 2,732 Member
    LMAO
  • jaymvita
    jaymvita Posts: 5,787 Member
    LovingLifeInCalifornia wrote: »
    Granted, but they are sheer pieces of clothing...so you can still see everything.

    I wish I'd just get up and do stuff!!!!!

    Granted, but you get arrested for having random, unnatural and frankly baffling sexual relations with inanimate objects around the neighborhood.

    I wish I didn't just think that up.
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