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I grant then ruin someone's wish...

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Replies

  • LCt99
    LCt99 Posts: 27 Member
    Granted, but now everyone you don't know has the burden of all your friends pain as well which is too much in addition to their own and causes a domino effect of suicides leading to the end of humanity as we know it.

    I wish oreos had zero calories.
  • cblue315
    cblue315 Posts: 3,836 Member
    Granted they have just recalculated the number zero when it comes to food and it really means ten thousand, so thanks for that I now have to run a marathon to have a cookie.
    I wish my new pedicure would last longer.
  • kjm3579
    kjm3579 Posts: 3,974 Member
    Granted, your new pedicure lasts forever however you hair now grows so wild that you need to trim it every day.

    I wish I was living on a tropical island
  • slimgirljo15
    slimgirljo15 Posts: 269,456 Member
    Granted.....its paradise ..but Dear Heart isnt there ...you soon grow lonely and bored...not such a great island hey..

    I wish i had unlimited funds
  • sweetandsassyred
    sweetandsassyred Posts: 1,607 Member
    Granted but you have to spend it all on unlimited bills.

    I wish I had all my shopping done.
  • cblue315
    cblue315 Posts: 3,836 Member
    Granted, shopping done, but mysteriously was loaded into someone else's car. Mmmm where did it all go?

    I wish I had a hot date tonight.
  • slimgirljo15
    slimgirljo15 Posts: 269,456 Member
    Granted...but next time dont cook the dates so long in the oven...you burn your mouth..
    I wish...I wasn't so bored
  • zcb94
    zcb94 Posts: 3,678 Member
    (I hear you!) Granted! Now you're so BUSY w/ office problems/housework, you ignore everybody you love. Ouch!
    I wish there were wholesome things on TV, besides foodie shows.
  • RunTimer
    RunTimer Posts: 9,137 Member
    Granted. (really) FULL HOUSE is back on
    FH-reunion.jpg
    ...Which also ruins your wish :)

    I wish it vacation time was longer
  • kjm3579
    kjm3579 Posts: 3,974 Member
    Granted, your vacation time is much longer since you are stuck on a desert island with just a soccer ball named Wilson for a friend.

    I wish I had a few days off from work.
  • shoppingmaniac86
    shoppingmaniac86 Posts: 2,067 Member
    edited June 2015
    Granted but you'll be sick with the flu

    I wish I was an awesome singer
  • GreySkyEyes
    GreySkyEyes Posts: 12 Member
    edited June 2015
    Granted, you're an awesome singer, but every time you hit a high note you pee a little.

    I wish I had an awesome swimming pool.
  • jaymvita
    jaymvita Posts: 5,787 Member
    GreySkyEyes wrote: »
    Granted, you're an awesome singer, but every time you hit a high note you pee a little.

    I wish I had an awesome swimming pool.

    Granted. Your pool is the envy of the block but your stunning inability to chlorinate it properly results in a searing bleach bath that blinds anyone who dares set foot in it. You yourself look like the lead character in Powder because of the chlorine damage to your body. But damn it's an awesome swimming pool.

    I wish I could get rid of this excess body fat percentage
  • shoppingmaniac86
    shoppingmaniac86 Posts: 2,067 Member
    jaymvita wrote: »
    GreySkyEyes wrote: »
    Granted, you're an awesome singer, but every time you hit a high note you pee a little.

    I wish I had an awesome swimming pool.

    Granted. Your pool is the envy of the block but your stunning inability to chlorinate it properly results in a searing bleach bath that blinds anyone who dares set foot in it. You yourself look like the lead character in Powder because of the chlorine damage to your body. But damn it's an awesome swimming pool.

    I wish I could get rid of this excess body fat percentage

    Granted but you'll gain it all back and then some

    I wish that my wishes wouldn't have any backlash
  • jaymvita
    jaymvita Posts: 5,787 Member
    Granted, your wishes have no backlash. Instead, every time one of your wishes is granted, someone somewhere dies a gruesome death and their cries of misery echo in your ears as you enjoy your spoils.

    I wish I knew what just happened.
  • shoppingmaniac86
    shoppingmaniac86 Posts: 2,067 Member
    edited June 2015
    Your wish will be granted

    But will be erased from your memories in .01 secs

    I wish I was a baller shot caller
  • _incogNEATo_
    _incogNEATo_ Posts: 4,537 Member
    Granted, but you don't get 20" blades on your Impala.

    I wish I was well-endowed... in my biceps.
  • jaymvita
    jaymvita Posts: 5,787 Member
    shoppingmaniac86 wrote: »
    Your wish will be granted

    But will be erased from your memories in .01 secs

    I wish I was a baller shot caller

    Granted. You're the best melon baller for the worst fruit tray production company ever. All the other melon ballets bow to you because you in fact call the shots. Too bad you're on an unrealistic deadline and spend all your time ballin'.

    I wish I remembered what just happened.
  • shoppingmaniac86
    shoppingmaniac86 Posts: 2,067 Member
    _incogNEATo_ wrote: »
    Granted, but you don't get 20" blades on your Impala.

    I wish I was well-endowed... in my biceps.

    Granted but then you become a woman

    I wish I was classy
  • jaymvita
    jaymvita Posts: 5,787 Member
    _incogNEATo_ wrote: »
    Granted, but you don't get 20" blades on your Impala.

    I wish I was well-endowed... in my biceps.

    Granted. Because your unborn twin didn't fully separate from you in uterine, your biceps sport a healthy ... Appendage. One that reacts in concert with your own. There's no hiding your intentions when you're out on a date ... Unless your wearing really rift sleeves.

    I wish I could unsee that.
  • jaymvita
    jaymvita Posts: 5,787 Member
    shoppingmaniac86 wrote: »
    _incogNEATo_ wrote: »
    Granted, but you don't get 20" blades on your Impala.

    I wish I was well-endowed... in my biceps.

    Granted but then you become a woman

    I wish I was classy

    Granted. You class yourself all the way up until you're an uptight, prude, Miss Manners know it all. You're gentility is impeccable. Your bedside manner is however deplorable and you die a spinster.

    I wish I could turn off the voices.
  • shoppingmaniac86
    shoppingmaniac86 Posts: 2,067 Member
    jaymvita wrote: »
    shoppingmaniac86 wrote: »
    _incogNEATo_ wrote: »
    Granted, but you don't get 20" blades on your Impala.

    I wish I was well-endowed... in my biceps.

    Granted but then you become a woman

    I wish I was classy

    Granted. You class yourself all the way up until you're an uptight, prude, Miss Manners know it all. You're gentility is impeccable. Your bedside manner is however deplorable and you die a spinster.

    I wish I could turn off the voices.

    Granted but then you start seeing ghosts

    I wish I could fly I wish I could touch the sky
  • jaymvita
    jaymvita Posts: 5,787 Member
    shoppingmaniac86 wrote: »
    jaymvita wrote: »
    shoppingmaniac86 wrote: »
    _incogNEATo_ wrote: »
    Granted, but you don't get 20" blades on your Impala.

    I wish I was well-endowed... in my biceps.

    Granted but then you become a woman

    I wish I was classy

    Granted. You class yourself all the way up until you're an uptight, prude, Miss Manners know it all. You're gentility is impeccable. Your bedside manner is however deplorable and you die a spinster.

    I wish I could turn off the voices.

    Granted but then you start seeing ghosts

    I wish I could fly I wish I could touch the sky

    Granted. You can fly. But you can neither steer nor land. So you float right up and out of the atmosphere and into the cold dark clutches of outer space. How long can you hold your breath?

    I wish I had a nickel for every wish I ruined.
  • RunTimer
    RunTimer Posts: 9,137 Member
    Granted, just in time for cash currency to be devalued in exchange for internet BITCOINs

    I wish everytime a bell rang an angel got its wings
  • jaymvita
    jaymvita Posts: 5,787 Member
    RunTimer wrote: »
    Granted, just in time for cash currency to be devalued in exchange for internet BITCOINs

    I wish everytime a bell rang an angel got its wings

    Granted. You maintain the official heavenly ledger that charts the angels who earn their wings every time a bell rings. But you're stuck in purgatory and won't ever actually earn YOUR wings. You're not jealous. At all.

    I wish I knew hot bitcoins worked. I keep deleting them from my computer ...
  • shoppingmaniac86
    shoppingmaniac86 Posts: 2,067 Member
    jaymvita wrote: »
    RunTimer wrote: »
    Granted, just in time for cash currency to be devalued in exchange for internet BITCOINs

    I wish everytime a bell rang an angel got its wings

    Granted. You maintain the official heavenly ledger that charts the angels who earn their wings every time a bell rings. But you're stuck in purgatory and won't ever actually earn YOUR wings. You're not jealous. At all.

    I wish I knew hot bitcoins worked. I keep deleting them from my computer ...

    Granted and then they no longer exist

    I wish my wishes were unlimited so I can wish for whatever I wishin wanted to wish for
  • semigallian
    semigallian Posts: 17 Member
    I wish all of the candy in this world would taste like rotting dog poop.
  • mrbyte
    mrbyte Posts: 270 Member
    jaymvita wrote: »
    RunTimer wrote: »
    Granted, just in time for cash currency to be devalued in exchange for internet BITCOINs

    I wish everytime a bell rang an angel got its wings

    Granted. You maintain the official heavenly ledger that charts the angels who earn their wings every time a bell rings. But you're stuck in purgatory and won't ever actually earn YOUR wings. You're not jealous. At all.

    I wish I knew hot bitcoins worked. I keep deleting them from my computer ...

    The coins aren't on your computer - they are in the blockchain. Just the keys are on your computer.

  • mrbyte
    mrbyte Posts: 270 Member
    shoppingmaniac86 wrote: »
    jaymvita wrote: »
    RunTimer wrote: »
    Granted, just in time for cash currency to be devalued in exchange for internet BITCOINs

    I wish everytime a bell rang an angel got its wings

    Granted. You maintain the official heavenly ledger that charts the angels who earn their wings every time a bell rings. But you're stuck in purgatory and won't ever actually earn YOUR wings. You're not jealous. At all.

    I wish I knew hot bitcoins worked. I keep deleting them from my computer ...

    Granted and then they no longer exist

    I wish my wishes were unlimited so I can wish for whatever I wishin wanted to wish for

    Granted, but everytime you make a wish, a neighboring black hole grows it's mass by 1,000,000 times.

    I wish I had Proffesor X's power.

  • shoppingmaniac86
    shoppingmaniac86 Posts: 2,067 Member
    mrbyte wrote: »
    shoppingmaniac86 wrote: »
    jaymvita wrote: »
    RunTimer wrote: »
    Granted, just in time for cash currency to be devalued in exchange for internet BITCOINs

    I wish everytime a bell rang an angel got its wings

    Granted. You maintain the official heavenly ledger that charts the angels who earn their wings every time a bell rings. But you're stuck in purgatory and won't ever actually earn YOUR wings. You're not jealous. At all.

    I wish I knew hot bitcoins worked. I keep deleting them from my computer ...

    Granted and then they no longer exist

    I wish my wishes were unlimited so I can wish for whatever I wishin wanted to wish for

    Granted, but everytime you make a wish, a neighboring black hole grows it's mass by 1,000,000 times.

    I wish I had Proffesor X's power.
    Granted but then you can only see into the mind of gay men

    I wish I was a vegetarian
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